All Comments on 'Party of Five Ch. 15'

This is one of the very best series I've read on Literotica. Please keep up the great work.

Where does Alice fit in this puzzle. Does Josh finally seduce Valerie. Answers please and soon

this series is one of the best if not the best story on this site that being said there are from my point of veiw some places that could be improved.

1. Dawn is fun cool and a dam erotic read, but in the first few chapters we got to see a human being (in her dariy and her trouble with guys) now its all preaty much sex (which is why i read it, but you know)where is the girl who wants love?

2 Where is the mother? now i am not saying you need to haave her involived in the sex but where is she all the time?

3 spelling now you have done a surperb job of writing but in chapter 14 i lost a sentence or to when he was talking to Alice

these are the few things i think could make it better

P.S. Alice rocks!

The last installation was toned down a bit when compared the the earlier installations. I love this story, it's one of the best I've read on this site. The one thing that I would say is that not to gloss over some of the interactions with Dawn as you did in this installation. I still love reading about Dawn's exploits in detail, and you provide them with wonderful detail.

Thanks and keep it up.

While this is a very enjoyable series I wonder when we will have the Party of Five and I hope that it means five women & Josh. It's great build up and Alice's involvement is eagerly anticipated. The stage is set to explore many more games between Josh and his sisters especially ones that are a little kinky. An avenue that has got to open up is the turning on of Laura as well as scoring with Valerie. Let the boy light up and score a few direct hits of his own to satisfy his curiosity and fantasies. One thing for sure he doesn't need to get fixed on the notion of incest what he is doing is fun, not legal but very erotic.

The best story I have read in a long time. I am interested in Alice, if Josh is not sure about Alice I think she is great and would date her in a flash.

When are Jacquie, Dawn, Alice and Josh (not to mention Laura) going to become one big, happy family? When are the communication barriers going to break down? Alice is hot as a pistol for Josh and so is Jacquie. The only problem is that Josh doesn't know how to tell everyone what is going on.

They need to have a wild party with family and Valerie and some of Dawn's friends. Let everything bust loose.

Your note coerced me to leave a comment. This is my favorite 5+ chapter series here. I have your submissions page bookmarked and I check it everyday, something I only ever used to do for BobClarkJr.

I like that you're deliberately keeping it slow. So many authors make the mistake of thinking new chapter = new combination of bedfellows. Keeping the sex 1 on 1 also gets a plus from me.

I am, like you, a bigger fan of sister-brother than any other incestual partnering, so I don't agree about the comments about Laura's absence. You mention her enough to be remembered. That Josh's mother-figure had actually become Jacquie while he was growing up seems logical enough to me to account for the lack of communication between Josh and his mother.

As for what I would prefer to be different...

Anon.'s first point. I, too, miss Dawn's human side. In the last couple of chapters she got a little bit too annoying for me. I like what you did some chapters ago better, that being Dawn telling Josh how she really feels about him after every time she gets him worked up with her teasing.

- K

I'm glad to see Alice's introduction to the party is warming up...I really like her interaction with the others now. I was glad to see another scene with Jacquie, but would like even more with her. I know you like to write Dawn, and she's a good read, but I'd like to see it balance out. I have a couple of suggestions as well...for you to take or leave as you with. Maybe Dawn could hide in a closet and watch Josh and Valerie...maybe something she'd enjoy doing? Also, if you're looking for a way to get Alice involved...i think it might be cute to have Jacquie help hook her and Josh up...I dunno...just things I was thinking while reading. Good stuff, keep 'em coming...

I just wanted to drop a line to you and say that I've been reading stories here for a long time and I've never found any better than yours. I've read a few multi-chapter series on here but yours is the only one I've ever actually eagerly awaited. You're right about one thing - I can't wait for Alice to get involved. Keep up the excellent work!

I like your work on this story but I have to ask... What the hell is wrong with Josh? You have written him to be the biggest asshole in this and if he really cared for his sisters he should have told them. Based on the way you have written the others, how do you plan to bring them together when Josh keeps lying to them.. No trust.

I’m reading your story from the very first episode. I have imagined that Dawn would have something to do with Valerie from the episode when Valerie first asked Josh out, then refused to date Josh… I’ve immediately thought that Dawn will manipulate Valerie… Perhaps she already have a relationship with Valerie…

Goodness gracious! I'm so sick of dawn it's not even funny. I want some Jaquie, already! I know I still have more to go, but this is for future reference. Enough with Dawn. Oh, and despite this chapter, if you ever stop writing I'm going to be knocking your door with a two by four.

First time commenting here, and I've really enjoyed the series. 90% of the other stories I've read here don't use the non-sexual parts properly. Their only purpose is to establish some form of context for the sex, and can completely irrationally jump from watching TV together to sex over the span of 1 paragraph. The build-up is just something you're supposed to hate, and trudge through until you get to the sex. This series, however, uses the non-sexual parts as something else to enjoy. It is well-rounded, and involved many different elements of story-writing. I frequently laugh at the many funny parts included in the series.

Not that the sexual part of the series is left ignored. People are saying that you're going too slowly, and yet I'm amazed at how effective the character development is. I got a hard-on just from Josh and Alice talking, something no other story on literotica has even come close to doing. Love the story, please keep writing

I didn't really get the why behind having Dawn drive him to the school then them having a conversation with her legs spread. They just didn't go together and it seemed quite off from your normal storyline. I love Josh's and Alice's conversations--as there's quite the "hidden invitation" there from Alice that Josh currently doesn't get.

You probably get this a lot already, but I still want to ask whether anything is going to happen between Alice and Josh, because she obviously really like him...

and am enjoying it immensely, still. Enough sex to keep it quite interesting and plenty of humor. I will finish the story, I just wanted to say thank you.

And I stopped reading your notes at the start of each chapter two chapters back, they irritate me, LOL. Thanks again for writing.

I can't read this anymore. Josh comes off as a complete fucking faggot who just happens to sleep with his sisters.

"Oh noes, what would some random chick who blew me off and only wanted to be friends think about me?!?"

"If I have any sexual thoughts about my sister, Alice, then I would be betraying her!"

Its official, the brother is an asshole douche and just needs his dick chopped off and lobotomized to put us out of the misery of him. I had hoped he would quit being such a loser after all of these chapters but it seems it isnt to be, sigh. I usually love multi sister stories but he just makes the story a burden to read.

Josh is annoying me as well though probably not for the same reasons as everyone else yeah he's acting like an idiot about Valerie but whats really annoying me is how he hasn't told Jacquie about Dawn yet and how hes treating Dawn as well, says shes just a slut and it annoys him yet when she shows anything different (ie. just sleeping in bed with him) he basically tells her to fuck off... grrr ... bit of a hypocrite if you ask me being concerned about betraying one sister by thinking of her "that way" (whats that about?) and treating the other like something he's scraping off his shoe.

...I swear... You gotta just love the story, but.... Josh is such an undeniable total fucking twat douchebag. Jeez! You pretty much love to hate his oxymoron retarded ass! He's banging two sisters and won't admit he wants to fuck Alice, much less admit he's in love with her. He's mostly physically infatuated with his girl-friend, solid crushville, just hoping she turns out to be a good person. (Funny how that works sometimes, have a longtime crush on someone, then get to know them an they turn out to be a prat!)

He is seriously a total wanker every time he's talking with Dawn, she comes up with fun fantasy conversation (say involving the other girls) and he turns into a repressive, prude wanker! Then his piss attitude about not doing it with anyone in the house. Ugh, next time I should cut and paste some wanker highlights! Lol.

Can I just shoot him and bury him and take his place? I'd be fucking all three sisters, mom and the girlfriend inside of two weeks. End of the month we'd be swapping out sleeping three at a time in bed at night! :)

Sorry to be so blunt. But your Josh is the most comprehensive and brutal character assassination I've ever seen. No woman would touch such a loser with a ten foot pole

I am surprised Dawn has not taken Josh to Lara's for a threesome.

Josh sound like a pussy or gay. What straight guy in his right mind would keep turning Dawn down for sex. Josh is a damn dumb ass.

I’m giving it a 10 for Dawn, Square Josh and Prudish Jacque, not so mich...

this really sucks lol im starting to think literotica.com is an elephant grave yard. i cant tell you the amount of good stories ive found on here just to realize they never got finished and are over 8 or more years since last being updated. i dont think ive read a single story, at least in the incest cat, that was long and actually finished.

I love the story and the pace you are going at. What ever you do don't stop writing these