by Tx Tall Tales
So nice ! I always enjoy this author's penchant for mixing in economic details with the purient ones. Now the vocational details of pool renovation come into ' play' as well. Though the the character of Amy was a little. sketchy in terms of her persona apart from aesthetics.
Personally I get creeped out when a woman goes into adoring puppy mode. She was not a challenge in short. The errant husband was a bit of a stereotype as well although those type of hubbies most certainly exist but usually TTT finds a way to insert a twist on tired modalities.
Regardless of those minute, dual quibbles everything clicked into place as if assembled by invisible story elves and the daunting nine pages whirred by for this reader . The multiple supporting characters were authentic especially the love /tolerance mix a college student accorded his parents.
The erotic content and detail was astonishingly varied for the Romance genre. If there is a graceful way to push the envelope - well this author will do that. Five Stars !
I never comment on a story, but yours deserves a comment...excellent writing, well developed story line, and an ending that leaves you undestanding the future of these two interesting characters.I will now search for additional writing from you, with the expectation of enjoying them as well. keep writing!
I rarely comment on stories, most are not worthy of positive comments, and I keep my negative thoughts to myself.
When I see nine pages, I worry that it's going to be a tedious read, but not this time. It probably could have gone many more, and still have been great.
Well done, I'm sure you are in competition for a winner, and I look forward to the next offering.
Wonderful story and so smoothly told. Yes, it's nine pages long, but they flowed beautifully. Good luck with the contest. :)
I'm with Amy; I'd love to learn to tango in Buenos Aires.
the title said it all please write some more, it just flowed and did not seem like nine pages good luck in the contest
J
One of your best...it was a great way to start off my Sunday morning.
not really a big fan of cheating but i was fuckin glued to dis story... simply amazing.. d list method for goals worked awesome with the story
when some come true, its icing on the life. TK U MLJ LV NV
This is the first time I've ever left a comment and I've been coming to this site for about 15 years I think. Well done. Great story. Kept me captivated and I felt that I had to get to the end. I could easily see this being made into a movie. And what a great ending. Being from Texas as well, a lot of the phrases and imagery were very familiar. Well done!
I enjoyed reading this. Most enjoyable. Need to read a chapter 2 ??? Story was realistic and without all the trashey verbals. This is my favorite. Great job and looking for more. Thank you!
Like all your writings, you are an excellent author. For those of us who don't write Thank-you for sharing your gift, it really is appreciated!
ummm wow...just wow! you are amazing! such talent! such emotion! i can seriously see this as a movie! cant wait to read more! ill will be keeping my eye out for you!
Fantastic!! Great writing style. Kept me riveted the whole time. One of the best. That must have taken a lot out of you. Thanks for sharing.
Its good to have you back posting stories. I've greatly enjoyed nearly all of your "tall tales"
Great story as always. I really enjoyed your other new one as well.
I have never read a better story you are a gifted writer!
what an incredible story. Length was amazing and made me want to keep reading. I hope you will continue to write, as I am sure us your readers will keep reading and enjoying.
I'm the "Amy" of your story; I was like her, living as a doll, as a fake to please the others, whilst the real me crushed and dying inside. I did not get married but I was living in darkness and droped out from university.
I can relate to her. I share her story, her feelings, her anger, her sexual energy. I even met my own "Alex", I too, had only 3 to 4 days with him. Although my "Alex" had his own issues and was out of my life after that, the very short time I spent with him was enough to awaken me and gave me the strength and courage. I experienced the powerful connection you described in the story, it's real. I'm now back to university, with a step by step plan of achieving my dream and my potential. I want to help people as well.
i never read a story over 5 pages long, i never comment on a story, so this must be on hell of a story to make me do both
Very well written story. You definitely are a very talented writer and would like to see more stories coming out of your pen!
One thing though… after having tomcatted around all summer with those promiscuous neighbourhood women – there is no reason to assume they (especially Jenna) weren’t having or had in the past other “liaisons” as well – there is a very high probability he would have gotten a STD. After all, according to the story he wasn’t using any protection with them. He thus took a huge risk. The same with the rape scene… he finds a note “inviting” him to rape one of the” housewives and he acts on it… without considering it even might have been a hoax or planted by someone else and he thus in fact would be raping a women against her will and knowledge! All that’s very naïve… and gets skipped by the author.
Really a tremendous story. I started reading it just looking for a quick "fix" so to speak...but ended up just reading the entire thing because it was so incredible. Extremely touching and deep. Great work.
Just a quick thank you for all the comments, and a little explanation for some.
This story was longer. Almost 14 pages, and it developed slower. Amy was harder to get, but it seemed to drag on, and I changed it, making her more desperate for love, and therefore quite a bit easier. Through the editing, her characterization became shallower than I like. I'm still not sure if I shouldn't have figured out a way to keep her on the hook longer, building up slower. So to LordSlamDawgg and Anonymous, good points, 100% justified, you caught me out.
I like my chapters to max out under 7 pages, so this was a bit of a challenge. I could have made it multiple chapters, but that would defeat the purpose of the contest. I had another story for the summer contest, but at 20 pages I just couldn't get it done - it will be submitted as a regular story shortly. It's still not done.
I appreciate the comments, especially constructive ones, such as LordSlamDawgg, who always provides useful information, and Belgium, who has very legitimate points. My fantasy stories often take place in a world where STD are not a concern (in spite of the warning about Jenna). As to our protagonist doing whatever asked, including the rape scene, he IS naive, and acting out after losing his fantasy girl. That part's intentional. He doesn't say no to anybody.
Pool details are pretty accurate. I've owned pools all my life, and worked a summer as a 'poolboy' but without the same results. I've worked as a public pool lifeguard. Chlorine is added when opening the pool, the Salt-chlorinator maintains the level. Water temperature rises VERY quickly up to about 90% here in Texas. The colder the initial water is, the faster it heats up. High seventies to high eighties can occur overnight, especially when the temperature stays above 95 at night. I know the comment author said he didn't need the details, but that's part of my style, I like to contribute strong background information. Maybe too much sometimes.
GoddessLilith, you're comment is most touching. I know there are women like this. My stories are rarely pure fantasy. Like most writers I build on real life, real people and real experiences. I know an 'Amy'. She's an amazing woman, and her situation breaks my heart. So far she hasn't met her 'Alex' to rescue her, and her one attempt to change things did not go well.
Thanks again for reading and contributing to make this story and future ones better. - TTT
I thought I had your story figured out at about page 4, things were going to get hotter and hotter and they would fuck by the weekend, blah blah, very obvious (but well done). I couldn't quite see how you would string that out to 9 pages.
Then the story took a sharp turn at about page 5 where Amy was crying and calling herself a slut. Suddenly it started being a Romance rather than an Erotic Coupling. This suddenly gave the story a lot of new life, the lists, the longings, etc., which made me want to find out whether they did find happiness, at all, or together.
So, nice touch.
The bit about all the other women was maybe a tiny bit unbelievable on two levels. First, that this would actually happen in real life. Second, he is in love with Amy so he spends all summer screwing other women? Kinda strange way of showing it.
Then at the end of the holidays (was it really the same year?) Amy visits him at college. I can just see this conversation:
Alex: "Amy! You've come back!"
Amy: "Alex! I love you and want to have your babies."
Alex: "Oh, Amy."
Amy: "Did you miss me Alex?"
Alex: "I sure did. I fucked about 40 other women, but yeah, I missed you."
See what I mean?
But, great story. I gave it 5 stars, it was a fantastic read. :)
I have been reading stories here for a few years,but was getting discouraged with the feeble attempts by the majority of authors. I started reading your work and couldn't put it down. The content was perfect and it flowed perfectly. No cheap tricks, just extremely talented writing. I have bookmarked you and intend on reading all your work as well as looking forward to future stories. Your research and talent are very evident. Thank you!!!
Loved the story and the life lessons. Also I loved the fact that the story ended with true love.
I have been reading and writing on here for over 10 years...this might be the best i have ever read here...first and only story i have ever rated. Great work.
Weaved the story together perfectly blending action and a good storyline. One of your best contributions and I have read them all.
This is one of your best! Love the way you brought it together and although you could see the end of the story before hand, you did a great job pulling it all together.
Keep it up..!!
I usually don't add comments on stories, but this one was deserving of one.
This story is just purely amazing, I love it. The words used, the passion, the flow- everything just fit together. Love love love love love LOVE this!
I didn't consider that long at all.
That is a good indicator of how good a story is, if the time just goes a you say,"damn, I can't believe it's finished already."
Great writing
ES
Couldn't stop reading once I started the story. Great character development.
I really liked both of your stories that I have read. Keep on writing.
I've enjoyed your stories, since I first came across them, and these latest one were very enjoyable! It was a nice drawn out tease to the very end, with some good development of the characters.
DON"T STOP WRITING!!
The whole story was well done. This is the first story of yours I read, and it was stupendous!
Looking forward to your other stories. Thanks!
A great story. Just made my 'Top 10'. Thank you for the characters, the storyline, the believability of it all.
THAT was THE best erotic story I have ever read! Amazing! Great job! I'm an absolute fan!!!!
It was so real! A bit exaggerated, but made a great story!
Loved every bit of it - and couldn't stop reading it till I reached the end.
Makes you hope and believe!
Awesome, fabulous!
Keep 'em coming!
it was going well until you got into the "Alex the neighborhood manwhore" portion of the story. Rape fantasy, B&D.. maybe a bit much to believe for a 19 year old to be that adept. could have left those two houses out of the story and it still would have read well.
on the other hand, the scenes between the main characters were well-written. And you didn't have the kid deck the jerk of a husband.
Enjoyed it, but as someone else pointed out, our 19 year old lothario was just about 900 yards past believable in self confidence, experience, and self control. What 19 y.o.s have you ever known that wasn't just a walking hard-on that thought nothing about anything except the always hard head between their legs? And for god's sake, what was he cleaning that pool with, a toothbrush? You've got him spending four days, I think you had the ratio of work time to play time reversed - either that or this was an olympic size pool. But despite all that, I admit, I enjoyed the story.
Erotica, love story and life lessons all in one. A masterpiece. Keep up the good work
Probably one of the best stories I've read on this site. Hope you write more!
Story was the longest I have read but it was also the best story I have read on this site so far. Good Job
One of the best if not best story I've read. Please keep writing more.
I like the length! I prefer getting it all at once! Thanks! Great story!
This was so hot and worth the long read! Thank you so much for posting this!
Thank you so much. I'm sure you already know this story is in the top one or two percent on this site,
Speaking as an Objectivist, I approve quoting Atlas Shrugged in a positive tone. I'm uncertain this, however, is an appropriate context.
A love story clothed in erotic fiction. Thanks for the romance and happy ending. Makes me realize how few things I ever do just for happiness. I've been faithful to my husband for 25 years, but a girl can dream . . .
I have read almost all of your stories. But to me this 1 is my favorite. Why?? because it's a slow build up and it doesn't mentions about "DP, a chick" instead Alex acts like a real men and fucks alot of MILFs to forget Amy. Just how it's suppose to be when you want to forget a chick even though it's hard.
P.S. It's always about, ' Shock, Denial, & Anger'.:P
with the three comments from 9/29 and 9/30. You've done it again! What a delicious combination of lust, growing love, Protestant work ethic, tender loving sex, role playing, rough sex, motivation, and occasional comic relief. Frankly, I don't know how you do it, but I have to view this as one of your best works. I thoroughly enjoyed the whole thing, from start to finish.
from the beginning to the end...this story is really cooooool
I am a hopeless romantic, and really enjoyed this tall tale. I loved the ending, & i am glad that you remember sex should be fun and it is nice when the women cum too. I hope you win the contest!
I thought that was an awesome story that had depth as well as a coming of age plot for both our hero and heroine. It was a little fanciful, but otherwise believable. Wish my goals were as easy or as straight forward as hers or his and that I had read those quotes earlier in life and not at my age. Again love the story.
"Dreams pass into the reality of action. From the actions stems the dream again; and Dreams pass into the reality of action. From the actions stems the dream again; and this interdependence produces the highest form of living." --Anais Nin
I am a big fan, this story is one of your best so far.
What a great read. I really liked the development of Amy's character, and the organic way you had her develop feelings for Alex. Good stuff. You didn't rush or get impatient with getting them together, you took your time and did it right. ("That's what she said.") Great story.
Really good and like the others one of your best. Would have like to have seen it go thru some more episodes with more details on the other women he was with and more with Jenny. Would like to see them get together as a threesome sometime, Would like to see how this plays out with them reaching their goals and others. Plenty of fodder for more episodes.
I came home after a great Thanksgiving dinner at a friend's house, and was a little lonesome, so I started looking over the Romance list in Best Stories. When I came to the poolboy story I just had to read it again. It's so well written, and the feeling of love gets gradually stronger as it goes. Naturally, I knew how it ends, so suspense wasn't involved, but that just made it easier for me to appreciate how you handled Alex's feelings for Amy. As I told you a long time ago, it's a beautiful story, and your description of his feelings is handled masterfully.
In all, this was like going back to a favorite place and enjoying it even more the second time.
The male POV of romance is so different from a woman's. Not clouded by all the flowery words and poetry nonsense. Straight and too the point. Absolutely loved it!
You. Are. The. Fucking. Man. That list..... has saved MY life. So for this I would like to thank you. You are the best. And again thank you.
-Friend and Admirer
I often find your stories when looking at the Top Story lists. When I see your name I know I'm in for a good read. Excellent erotica, but its the style and attention to detail that make your writing so enjoyable.
Thank you and keep 'em coming! (no pun intended)
Good God man. This story was absolutely phenomenal, no other way of saying it! I hope you continue to write, you are extremely talented.
I came in for a possible quickie and something possibly fluffy and heartwarming and come out in tears. From hoping for sexual fulfillment, I got emotionally fulfilled. This was beautiful. Undisguised, inspiring, and simply beautiful. I might have to hunt down your works for a while.
PS It might sound strange, but this kinda helped me out of my mini-emotional dump, so thanks for that.
Once again, I'm totally blown away by your story. Thank you for this.
"As beautiful as the package is, for the moment, I'm a lot more interested in the contents."
I think that line alone was the clincher for the story.
I didn't finish it. She's a whore, basically, screwing a college kid out of 4 days of labor. The idea of women trading their favors for money - hookers just don't do it for me.
Have read thousands, and can say ive enjoyed this one the most! Thank you so much for making a story with all the painstaking little details like the quotes etc - makes things so much richer. and the alternating erotic and emotional tones really brought it together. Thank you and here's to more stories!
A lusty teenager and a desparate housewife move from a simple business arrangement to serious, complicated love.
I feel myself as Alex, loving Amy so much that he has to let her go. How sad for them both. And then comes the glorious ending as the two reunite to consummate their love! Great, sensitive writing!
My favorite story and favorite author on Literotica!
Stuff like seven summit challenge just made it even more real... and i could so relate to it as a climber myself!
Kudos!
This story is perfect. I have written for Lit and have been reading stories on here for years and I love this particular creation. It made me horny, happy, sad, excited and then hope for the happy couple. I don't feel the need to watch them make love on a mountain or anything. You left them at Happily Ever After, and please keep them there!
Though, if anyone could write a sequel to this one, it is you.
This is one of the very best stories I have read in a long time. Absolutely brilliant.
Thanks a LOT for giving us the pleasure of reading such a wonderful story.
You are one hell of a writer! Wish I could have written that.
Lots more, please.
I couldn't stop reading -- not that I tried! And the hopeful ending was icing on the cake. Thanks for a great story.