All Comments on 'Pretty Little Toilet'

I sure as fuck hope it's a fantasy. 😝

The star I gave was because you did repeatedly give opportunity to safeword.

Thank you for commenting respectfully even though it isn't your thing.

But yeah, it is indeed... a fantasy to be kept a fantasy (at least to this kind of extent.) Some of it is also my writing brain's inability to just do the Best Possible Scenario where everyone who hasn't pre discussed a scene follows unwritten rules. Thus the need for someone to watch over and it to go.. absolutely too far the once and on the edge of too far a couple of other times.

It was a story that kept me reading and was well written, but I felt it went waaaayyyy too far. It is only my opinion and she was given the opportunity to use her safeword once the gag was removed and I suspect there was a way to safeword even with the gag. Ryan came off as an asshole but in reality was not, he did what he had to I suppose but he also was concerned. He did clean up for her and threatened her if she told that he did. Her Master should have taken a change of clothes as not only was she covered in piss she was forced to wear clothes that were the same. Being the toilet was degrading but the brush was a bit overboard. More so when another Master chose to use it to show his sub how he would use it on her if she didn't behave. Ryan was concerned about her wellbeing especially when that happened. So he cared, helped her clean up even if he seemed to be an asshole he wasn't. This was a fantasy or at least I read it as one so I gave it more than 1 star, but not 5 stars as it went too far.

Totally respect your right to rate it lower, so please don't think this is me arguing about that. I just kind of wanted to explain.

My brain... doesn't spit out perfect fantasies where everything goes perfect. I really, really wish it did. My life would be easier if I could rub one out without my brain suddenly going 'That wouldn't happen like that.'

But further than that I had a couple of narrative reasons.

It absolutely does go too far. The toilet brush is definitely something Ryan saw in Porn and liked the idea of- but reality turned out to not be what he thought it would. He'll probably return to the idea but keep it external( like scrubbing her down)- and even then, he probably won't go back to it for awhile. He also didn't realize that the other Master would be that rough, but that's a risk when letting someone enter a scene without knowing them and without having a long conversation before hand.

I'm working on a sequel that goes much better in general. It shows that she hasn't been back to the club even though her and Master still like the idea of her 'earning' new things. And Ryan gets his camping trip, with a much smaller amount of people using her. People he was able to talk to before hand so even if he doesn't know exactly what is going to happen- he knows them well enough to know they won't go too far from what has been brought up. Hannah gets to enjoy being a urinal with the most 'painful' thing she's put through being gravel under her knees.

Well I loved the story x

We're never told, are we?

I'm definitely going to keep an eye on your future work.

I'd love to read what else she'll do for that machine. Or what she does with Ryan.

I feel like you represented how a safer version of this type of scene should go. Frequent checkins by a trusted scene guard, opportunities for her to retract her consent and end the scene. Bottom's safety is monitored by scene guard at all times.

Well done.

Just when I feel I've read it all here, I find you. Another level of submission and degradation that offers devotion that is transcendent, beyond anything the vanilla world knows. Thanks little Hannah. I'll go and look further...