by BreakTheBar
BTB, I think was a quality production of your creativity. A believable pace of development as your character Austin revealed a depth of personality unusual for this genre.
At first it seemed as if he was just going to be another whiny virgin-lad who accidentally polishes the magic lantern and then wham, bhan, whose next, ma'm?
However Austin's character showed character and turned out to be a lot more mature than seemed obvious at first glance. Then you bring this story to a crescendo with a very hot dose of erotic lovemaking.
Well paced & developed, nice transitions with characters that "work" and a very wide open opportunity to continue in the future with A & A will be very interesting. Even Austin's Mom should get her way for the wedding and below, hopefully.
BRAVO!!!! Please bring us more on this story line.
Best forever fuck friend :)
wouldn't be at all surprised if they ended up HEA*
*happily ever after
:)
I want more stories with these two because the characters were so much fun to read about. Austin was, despite his innocence, remarkably mature for the role he gets to play, Alanna is a diamond a in the center of a rough, gnarly slop pit, and I mean that in the nicest way.
More please....
And can't wait for the next chapter in their relationship. Jmontzingo@hotmail.com
Austin is a completely believable character. Trying to be the nice, decent guy, not understanding what it is that she wants. Her wanting him is just not in his paradigm, so he never sees the clues. He never interprets what she is saying in the way she wants him to understand. Few people have insight into the nice guy's plight.Well played!
Took a long time to get to the sex, but that was OK.
My problem is that when the sex happened it happened MUCH too quickly. No slow undressing. No first look at her breasts and nipples. No first touching and feeling. No slow buildup of sexual excitement.
She was naked, gagged and hogtied, and the pre-sex conversation just didn't do it for me.
I gave it 4 stars.
Yes it took a while to get to the ex, but that is what I liked most about it! The build up, anticipation and hoping that the good guy (Austin) winning the girls heart! Yes I did enjoy the sex part too, but I'm a romantic at heart!
I really hated that the story ended, but you ended it well! I choose to believe that because Alanna stated that she didn't plan on ever dating again, you are implying a long future together. Like I said ... A hopeless romantic!
I hope there are more stories about these two! I couldn't give you a 10, so a 5* will have to do.
Enjoyed it! Long enough to set up the story and short enough to not be repetitive in any aspect.
Thank you and keep sharing
Ed
I really liked the way they had been best friends and wanted to take to the next level but just didn't know how.
I also have to ask, StangStar06 always features a mustang somewhere in his stories. Given you use name and that you had Alanna break a bar during the first party, will you be working a broken bar into all of your stories?
GREAT story and build up. I'm sitting here wishing this was a book I was reading so there would be MORE it's 4:50 am Thursday morning July 23 2015 I have to work at 9 am but here I am just now finishing your story * kudos definitely keep me updated on Alanna and Austin drblock19@gmail.com
Your story is very good so far! (Which means I vote for another chapter)
I've also noticed a theme with your girls from several recent stories i've read. You're more into the athletic type than the classic thin, non-athletic girl who is just attractive. You go for girls who are in shape but also attractive, which is something I also like ;)
Got to cut Austin some slack.
He's a guy.
Guys don't do hints.
Guys don't get hints.
On top of that, he's an inexperienced guy, so he really has no clue.
Add to that Alanna has been out as a lesbian for years, why would her closest friend even though he is male hit on her?
What sort of insensitive lout do you take him for?
Loved it and contine this story right right where it left off please.
Hey everyone,
First off, thank you so much for all of the feedback you've been posting here or sending me. I appreciate every single note I get, and the fact that many of you are discovering my other works because of Pushing Buttons is fantastic.
@rightbank - No, there is not a broken bar in all of my stories. My username references an old quote from my university days, where my college at the time would air-thrust as part of cheers and such. When teaching first years how to properly thrust, we would always so you had to 'break the bar.'
@Anonymous - I appreciate you noticing the trend amongst some of my female characters. Maybe it's a subconscious thing for me, because I like all types of forms and figures on women, but I have been leaning towards athletic in my writing.
Now, I should warn those who are looking forward to the next story featuring Austin and Alanna - it will not be in the same vein as this one. I have set up these characters, and their immediate surroundings, to fuel a few 'homage' stories to some of my favourite sub-genres here on Lit. The next story, which has been eating up more writing time than it is due at the moment, will be a Strip Poker story. While I will be endeavoring to produce meaningful relationships, the fact is Alanna is a naughty girl and Austin is along for the ride of his life.
I encourage you to join up for my email list to get some more hints into this, as well as my other works.
Thanks again all!
~ Break.
You stories are very well written. Thank you. Can't wait for more of this and Font, and now I'll have to read the Estranged books too.
Loved the story Break. Can't wait for future installments to this and Font. Great job.
Well written and sexy. One word of advice: Leave out the "almost" and "practically" (Allana was practically writhing...)
theres tons of stories straight to gay(both male and female) but NO to other way around,been open minded is a to way street
Not knowing they were a story together I read Pushing Boundries 1st. I like them both , I like your style. Very entertaining
Really enjoyed the unusual path this love story took from childhood buddies to lovers.
Look forward to reading more,hoping their love continues to grow.In a quirky manner,of course.
but still thoroughly enjoyed getting there...well done! A really good read...waiting for the follow up!!!!!!
He is a moron. I was that gullible and clueless at 15 with my dream girl but at his age all the whining for 2.5 pages was too much. Thank you and i read the next part already it was epic. Can we have a story with Austin, Alanna and Mel? thx
I'm all wound up and hard as a rock! Thanks for the exciting tale, and the exciting tail! Hope they'll be going farther soon! I'd love to have him take her ass cherry!!
This doesn't happen too often but about page 3 I had become totally bored with this story and stopped reading it.
To me I liked this story. It seemed good to me slow story, makes the outcome better, develops great emotional stress.
I want you to write soon a continuation of this story.
Congratulations on your work.
5* for you.
I apologize for my English, is not my native language.
Seriously?? This was fucking retarded. At least have some common sense in your fucking story. Chick was enjoying being a lesbo nymph but apparently wanted her male best friend who confessed to her before to fuck her. Like she couldn't just sit down in his lap and stick his tongue down his throat. And then grinding all over some jock but apparently what she wants is his skinny ass. So she makes it look like somebody broke in and is about to rape her.
I liked the story. You'd be surprised at how irrational people can be, especially about romance and especially romance with a long time friend. As far as the goofy rape plan goes, lets remember that she's a bit of a freak already, she's tried numerous other occasions to grab his attention without putting her feelings on the lines and three and most importantly, she's plastered and is ending a wild night. She never said the rope wasn't a spur of the moment thing and even if it wasn't...
props, kinda sweet. Totally want to explore this couple more.
Almost 2 years ago to the day you said there would be more to cum....talk about suspense....lol
good development, well written, nicely engaging characters, thanks!
For all of us guys that have ever been in the "Friend Zone" with a beautiful girl/woman. Way to go bud !!
I thought you did a great job .. I’m a sucker for a happy ending ... thanks !!
Nicely paced and a decent length to wrap things up. Could be taken further with another chapter. All in all a great effort.
Austin tries so hard to do the right thing that he ends up meeting everyone's needs but his own. That they all take him for granted for it adds a whole other layer of frustration. (Although, if they did show appreciation for his sacrifices, that would be just as frustrating, in a different way.)
@Tw0Cr0ws: Yes, exactly. She's given him every reason to believe she couldn't possibly like him "that way". So any hint that maybe she does ... he'd discount it as merely his own wishful thinking. He'd be an asshole to just assume it was for real, and doesn't know how to ask without jeopardizing the existing friendship.
Says a guy who's spent a lifetime caught in that trap - and who's probably on the spectrum to boot, so "doesn't get hints" applies in spades.
That made the first part of the story somewhat unpleasant for me - it cut too close to the quick - but it's well written for all that. It kept me reading past my discomfort.
I'm just glad it didn't go where I was expecting - to a full-on Ayla-and-Jondalar level of nearly losing each other (from Jean Auel's "The Mammoth Hunters").
I loved the sex, once they got to it.
I would have liked to read more, though, about Alanna's feelings about it. It was her first time with a guy, after all. The story's clear that she loved sex with him, but I wanted details! Then again, they'd be hard for a male author to write convincingly, so I can't fault you too much for choosing not to go there.
5* - despite my griping, it's an excellent story. I'm looking forward to reading the sequels.
This story is fantastic! I never have been a fan of the BDSM stuff, but you have really piqued my interest with this one. I actually read 'Pushing Boundaries" first, and I found myself becoming curious about the BDSM references. That coupled with your description of Alanna as such a sexy woman really got my attention. I've read quite a few stories here on Literotica recently, and yours really stand out for the way you make the images of the women come to life in the eyes of my imagination. I'm really looking forward to reading your other stories. Please add me to your mailing list: ds75762@gmail.com
Just a great story. Bad girl, nice guy....Glad to see the nice guy win out....
Yeah, no. This guy is doomed. If she's pulling this much crap in the "trying to interest him" phase he'll be sucking other guys jizz out of her before he knows what hit him.
The bitch is toxic.
Too long a build up. I was getting worried that he was going to blow it.
A very satisfactory ending though with the promise of more to come.
Very well edited. I only caught one mistake and no homophones. Well done!
Your descriptions were spot on & very a rousing. Wish I could get my wife to read & enjoy this story arc.
I’m working my way through all your stories & I’ve only 2 series to go through. Retired with physical disabilities so I read Literotica stories as pastimes. Along with a tumbler of Don Julio
& ice.
Life’s not all that bad.
Bill S.
I am reminded of the Hanson Bros, in Slapshot and 'Hit Somebody (The Hockey Song)' by Warren Zevon (written by Zevon and MItch Albom) when I read this passage:
She didn't really care about scoring that much, she left that to her team and it worked out. Alanna was in it for the big hits.
ALANNA IS A BULLY AND A SADIST AND AUSTIN IS A PASSIVE CUCKHOLD TYPE - THE OTHER CHARACTERS - LIKE HIS MOM - AND THE OTHER RUGBY PLAYERS HAVE MORE ACCEPTABLE CHARACTERS. AUSTIN'S NAME FITS - HE IS A WIMP - OZ IS A HOPE - WHO HE SHOULD BE. SO MUCH HERE IS PAINFUL - GIVE HIM SOME BALLS. I COULD NOT READ THE 5th CHAPTER THE FIRST TIME AS I WAS SURE HE WOULD CHICKEN OUT - AGONY.
The succinct, "gay wimp turns lesbo straight," about sums up my feelings. The dude is a coward at every turn, be it his dick flick, sucker punch or not vocalizing his feelings. By the time we come around to them making up I'm rooting against them because she has been spoiled and he is too cowardly to for me to root for him. This character is the eunuch that tries to bang the women back at camp while the real men are out hunting. Even his girl is more masculine than him. She plays rugby and grabs women while he sits and nags.
Guess I’m surprised at the negative comments. The writing is first rate and the story arc is phenomenal! Tight dialogue. Could reread this multiple times and not get bored. Please keep writing!
The writing is good but the premise and character development is terrible. Austin nor Alanna are believable in any way, it just feels all too fantasy and not enough realism for a story with as much set up as this one has.
I really enjoyed this story. Not sure why it is getting so many negative comments. Keep up the excellent work!
Lovely story. I came to it via the second one first, and was surprised, but pleased, that this one was relatively short. No long drawn out childhood scenes. Looking forward to the series one day being expanded further.
Too much frustrating/annoying setup. Why spend 3 pages (which is most of the story) of him being an idiot when it's obvious he'll be the one in the end? Because of that there's not enough suspense to justify the eyeroll inducing buildup.
Alanna is definitely a naughty, horny little slut though. She's still gonna want pussy in the future so Austin is likely to get his heart broken at some point. Maybe a few 3somes along the way though lol.
Nice, slow build. A bit clunky in the transition. Trying to make a man with low or no self-esteem is a losing proposition.
Having read the last 2 stories of this series first, I enjoyed this story more than if I had read it first. Cute. Wish you could/would write more chapters/parts to add to the folks in parts 1,2 and 3.
As sexy as the series was, I also found humor mixed in. Completely entertaining.
I loved it, even tho it was dragged out to much. However there was no explanation about why she suddenly changed sexually, are we supposed to guess? But it was obvious that they were madly in love. I had no fears for the future, unlike striker24 ( see his comments) who I found. Is a miserable git.