by fannyrat
Irish Mike - fuck off with your greater than though comments. Arsewipe!!!
So when a reader provides feedback, without hiding behind anonimity and without being a jerk about it, the comment gets deleted?
Congratulations fannyrat, you will never improve in your writing. Hard to do when you ignore critiques meant to help you improve.
I have taken loads of advice from fellow authors. As you quite rightly say the only way to improve is to take criticism. I look forward to reading your contributions and stories and hope to use them as a benchmark for my aspirations as a writer.
Very well written and you made a somewhat typical storyline new and improved. Thank you.
So are you saying that only people who submit stories have the right to critique others? Or perhaps you are saying that only the people who write stories actually know how write. For the sake of argument, let's say you are correct on the second one. If you will recall, I did not criticize you on anything related to technical ability in your writing. I did not say anything about grammar, spelling, word usage, etcetera. I only made comments about two things in your story that I felt negatively affected its believability.
I like the way this is not just another mother/son type story, it seemed a bit more believable in a strange way,hope you write some more like this.
I loved your story. You caused my imagination to run wild causing more than one orgasm as I read you.
I only wish I could bare a son.
Thank you.
I have read articles about incest, periododicals written for doctors and think this could be real life. A young woman raped and the only man in her mid-life is a son. He is both her prodigy and her intimate relationship. The end was not what a rational person would do. The child would need to be shielded from its biological heritage. Most boys imprint on their mothers as their base of sexual desire. The older woman is the object of the Oedipus Rex scenerio. I have lived part of that.
I know of a rape victim who got pregnant also. She had the baby and everything because she doesn't believe in abortion. I could see this story happening in real life as it is not so far fetched from actual reality. It was a pretty good read.
The only thing that stands out about this piece of junk is that some of the commenters' come across as being inept with the English language. "He is her prodigy". Maybe her progeny. "I only wish I could bare a son". Try bear.
If you can't write proper English, don't embarrass yourself.
You clearly don't have a firm enough grasp of the English Language to know that you're wrong. The words used in the story were correct, however you might have missed that part of English Class and can be described as an uninformed jackass. Before you try correcting anyone make sure you yourself are in fact correct. Wouldn't want to be embarrassed now would we?
On a different note great story 5⭐🌟🌟⭐⭐
I liked your story. The writing is very good. The part about the rape and the use of DNA evidence to get 2 million pounds were both believable and the latter was clever. I liked the illicitness that the mother experienced and wanted to continue. I would have preferred for it to continue in the end rather than have the two of them get married. The ending seemed to me to be both undesirable and unworkable, and took away what incest stories need to be stimulating - the feeling of it being wrong and thus guilt-producing.
I really liked the idea when you didn’t want Tom as a husband, your man or lover but as your son to have an incestuous relationship with your son. This is just the thought that sparks all the excitement.
But, alas, this meandered into a morbid man-wife relationship instead of a son-husband and mother-wife relationship.
Better luck next time!
You tried to make this a mom/son love story but you failed miserably. It all came down to deceiving her son and getting at her rapist and his family. She wasn't "in-love" with her son. She was in love with incest. 2*
I really liked this one a lot. Pretty believable and strong premise. Her changing of mind could have been built up longer.
I HOPE A LONGER STORY WITH MORE DETAILS AND POLISHING CAN BE WRITTEN BY SOMEONE INSPIRED FROM THIS STORY'S IDEA.
mrfr42
An EXCELLENT short story.
I have really enjoyed reading this work especially the return visit to the grandfather.