All Comments on 'Savannah Ch. 01'

i loved the story can't wait for ch02 and beyond

please let her dad be cool with him and his little girl. you know the whole a man working to stand on his own.

Her dad ain't gonna be cool with it. If that's not true than, the her mom certainly isn't going to be cool with it. She'll probably forbid Grace to see Chase.

Y'all is short for you all. No true Southerner would say it to a single person. Good story otherwise.

I hope there is more to come soon. And actually, one of the previous commenters is incorrect - I know southern people who use y'all in the singular out of habit.

Great work. A universal theme of sorts and well written.

Smoking kills. :-P Just gonna guess, from previous works, I'm guessing we're going to see a lot of drama here as well. Looks like we're headed that way since these two come from different soco-economic backgrounds.

I'm from Kentucky and I say "y'all" quite frequently. Great story, hun. =)

right out of the park! Can't wait for Ch. 2!

This is a great start to a new story. Keep up the good work.

...except when the person represents a group or organization. For example, you can go into a store and ask one of the workers "Do y'all have any eggs?", because you're not asking about her personal eggs, you are asking about the store's eggs. But that's not the case in this story: all the "y'all"s are addressed to a single person (Chase) who doesn't represent any group, and I cringe at each one of them.

But I'm still interested to see how the story goes.

Okay I got to the second I which you decided should be expressed is "Ah". Really? You introduced the story as southern and you used y'all. You don't need Gawd or any of that other crap. It's annoying to read.

Its great, but the "ah"s get kinda annoying. I get it. She's southern, but it gets to a point where it's annoying. Also, please, please, please continue the "Beauty and the Geek" and "We're Screwed" story lines.

would like tosee where this goes

I actually like the slang, it adds realism to the story being in Georgia. I am from the south and appreciate reading a southern story for once, but they are right about the use of "y'all." Y'all is "You all" and you used it on one person. It is used on a group or establishment as the previous person said. Anyway, I like where the story is going and love every story you've written, Keep it up!

Not sure about this one! The language was a bit distracting for me, and the characters were 'bleh'. I really love Beauty and the Geek, though so maybe I will see how this develops.......

FYI, readers, some authors aren't comfortable using the proper word "God" in a story. Either a scene or story doesn't warrant that much gravity, or it's simply a personal choice of the author.

I liked the story, but it did feel a bit like Miley and Charlie moved to Georgia with the whole guy getting a girl who's out of his league thing. But as other people have said, interested in seeing where this is going.

Like it so far, it has a sort of Dirty Dancing meets Gone with the Wind feel to it. I almost thought Grace was going to call him a filthy brute or something near the end, only for him to say he didn't give a damn, then kiss her.

It is similar to Miley and Charlie, but don't let that discourage you. If that's what you enjoy writing, write it! We evidentally enjoy reading it or we wouldn't be here. The key thing to writing I find, is to write and write and write. And more than that, write something you enjoy writing. If this is it - more power to you.

Once again, I love this story as much as I have loved Beauty and the Geek! Can't wait to read more, but I understand your situation and will be patient. Great work!

-Spartan

I've read this story a few times and I enjoyed it I cannot wait for future installments. I see room for conflict though I hope Grace and her friend do not have to fight over Chase. Unlike Beauty and The Geek, I can see Grace and Chase going slow and having a good build up to the actual first time.

While on the topic, I disagree with others who think this story is a re-themed Beauty and the Geek. The main plot is similar except instead of school status, it is socio-economic status but how many times have we seen book, movie or tv series involving two people from different crowds falling in love? I do not think Chase and Charley are the same character though Miley and Grace pretty much are. The difference between Chase and Charley is that Charley has his lack of self-confidence and being an outsider that has lived in that town for his whole life while Chase has self-confidence and is only an outcast for being a move-in. Chase could get a girl like Grace IF the socio-economic issues didn't exist while Charlie could not.

Thank you. And please don't forget about Savannah. She can always use another turn in the spotlight.

Cigs are bad yo....but otherwise a great starter story.

to not realize that "y'all" is the contraction of "you all" and thus *plural*, so not to be used when addressing a single person.

Actually, in some areas of the south, 'y'all' is singular, and 'all y'all' is plural. I don't know how it's handled in that particular area.

I have lived all over the south nearly all my 76 years. I have NEVER known any true southerner to use "y'all" when speaking to a singular person. There ARE times when we speak to a single person and say "Y'all come to see us." It simply means the invitation is extended to the person's entire family or business. NEVER to a solitary person!

de Jay

First of all, I totally enjoyed the story!

Secondly, I actually grew up in Savannah (51st St). Y'all is definitely plural.

(just commenting to concur with the other posters)

Love the work though!

Love this one! Spent a bit of time in Savannah once...loved that too...enjoyin' this immensely!

We all dont have a sothern drawl? In So. Cal.

A very wholesome story I'm thourally enjoying your story, "dude"!

A very enjoyable read. Looking forward to how things evolve with these two .

I’ve liked all your work so far but writing a southern accent is difficult but you need to know the rule for using ya’ll it is reference to more than one. Never used for one person. Otherwise it’s not too bad. Good story so far.

I think it depends on which part of the south. A friend of mine is from southern VA, and he says that there y'all is for one person, and "all y'all" is for more than one. Who knows, it might even vary by county or by holler!

I hate phony Southern accents and grammar. At least the author should admit upfront their ignorance and apologize for it. In spite of what PhotoMaster days, every part of the South I have lived in has used "y'all" as the plural of "you". That is certainly true in Georgia.