All Comments on 'Saving My Sis'

Your subject matter was wonderful. Your approach was believable. With a little experience your word flow and vocabulary will improve. You did very well. Old Reader.

Beautiful - just keep it that way.

Lukas

Don't we ALL wish our sisters were THAT horny for us ugly, mean, old older brothers!!!!

I've read better but this was good. I enjoyed, keep up the good work.

another chapter please???

I think that if you used contractions in the characters dialoge,ur writing would have flowed better and been more believable.Other than that,nice work!

it is a good story and i could really believe it

Also pretty emotional if pictured right... If you did not say he was a marine the realism in your story I think would have fallen. Only a disciplined man *marine joke/comment here* would knock a father like that only once... cause there's always the old fashioned one-two if you get me and boxing last I knew has many good ol one-two combos.

Anyhow good story yet you should specify what they had to go through as what you did mention is just light stuff, like verbal abuse compared to some certain other things.

...as you might think...My first wife was abused by her mother and one of her many boy friends...This is a fantasy and very stylized for effect...but it does happen...Work on your plot structure, and character development with opening up the story for a better take on why this all happened to the kids. Overall though, good job, and not just a bit more than average hot...

you say that he sent her in to get the room at the motel ARE YOU CRAZY? if he sent her in the person at the desk would call the cops. you do not send a girl with chopped up hair and slit wrists in to pay for a room think before posting please.

I felt the same feeling when my sister touched my cock. very nice story.

Read the sodding story, asshole, and stop obsessing about slit wrists and motels. Jeez ! Don't they have sleeves in your world ?

That was a great story keep up the awesome work

Keep up the awesome work. Hope you make this into a series. I'd like to see where this goes.

I hate stories that start this way. It's like listening to the drunk family next door. I feel that these stories should be entertaining,not about a dysfunctional family.

Have to keep this story going. Semper Fi. Thanks

Omg, that had to be in my top ten here for worst english phrasing and spelling problems, lol! The plot was fairly cliche' (a lot of that around here though) but I'll give points for the storyline, even if I was cringing a lot! Thanks for writing though.

It was great but I bloody hope theres more...

It got my panties soaked :-D ;-) xoxo

he receives a hero's reward. His kid sister's adorable little coochie.

No problem with the plot, though your pacing and exposition need some work. But you would be surprised what not punctuating correctly does in terms of off-putting your readers. Give us some more detail and slow down your action a touch, and maybe give us more backstory, and your stories will entertain as well as tittilate.

Greatly aroused thinking of being the brother saving the sister. Hope to read more.

Who doesn't want to be the hero and save his sister or mother?

Very Nice!

Thank you for such a sweet story. For siblings to be in love is the greatest love of all.

A wonderful story. Love it. AAAAA+++++

Tragically beautiful!

Perfect damsel in a distress love story with her Marine!