All Comments on 'Second Born'

Glad to see that you are still writing, I've enjoyed many of your stories and am looking forward to more. I would love to see you revisit and expand some of your older stories, such as Little Ms Marker or The Accidental Master. Your stories are always well organized and a pleasure to read. Excellent work!

This was a well written thoughtful and totally amazing story you have a gift that deserves to be heard

Absolutely fantastic. Loved the attention to detail and the plot as well. I’m going to go read your other stories as well. Thank you for such a well written tale and I have to admit, I was skimming through the naughty bits, just so I could continue with the tale. Bravo!!

Great story. Enjoyed it immensely. 5 stars. Keep it up

One of the best I've ever read.

Your top notch story! I've noticed all your stories are rated 4.5 or above.

5

Bravo! Stayed up late two nights in a row reading this. Loved it!

As some others wrote i skimmed through the sexy bits to get back to the main plot, please keep writing five stars from me.

Great story and would have given 10 ⭐️ ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ If possible! A follow-on story is hopefully coming soon!

A proper enumeration of all the merits of this novela would require many pages.

It was a pleasure to read.

Thank you.

Excellent..... Sometimes after a few pages or chapters you understand (good or bad) how the story or writing is trended .. I kept reading and before I knew it, I was finished. Thank you for a wonderful read and story, hopefully there is more to come....

good story plot wise, but needs editing, kool use of the multiple languages,

Got a surprise when I found this.

A great story.

Thank you.

Cheers

Wonderful read a second part would be excellent.

Fantastic war story. Lovely read. If I have any criticisms, oddly enough, it's in the sex. It was rather distracting from the overall incredible narrative. But, as this is Literotica, I can hardly complain about such things, can I? Brilliantly done.

Absolutely loved this story, it was well written & had a good plot from start to finish, look forwards to another follow up story to see how Medusa develops going out into the galaxy....

Absolutely outstanding! Wish I could rate it higher than 5 stars.

Thank you for sharing with us!

DOS

Overall great story. It has a bit of a rough start. You have a meandering style of storytelling where you imbed multiple ideas within a scenario… your run-on sentences are so long they appear to be run on paragraphs. Many of the flashbacks didn’t add much and the “cum stretcher “ is unnecessary and jarring to read… frankly some of your word choices were extremely repetitive ex: convivial . The story could easily stand out as one of the best with heavy editing and removal of most sex scenes.

Wow, great read. Five Stars ain't enough.

Great story! I suspect Sir Galahad is both a Space Opera/Sci-fi reader and has a U.K. Forces connection, far too many references to books I’ve read and U.K. terms e.g. “in mufti” & “Bootnecks”, both terms I doubt many countries have heard of or use (barring Canada, Australia and NZ etc). That said, it was a great read, but there was a moment I really wondered if it was a satire…. It didn’t really need the sex scenes which seemed superfluous and crowbarred into the story flow tbh, a merciless edit and re-post into Non-Erotic might help enormously. I’d really like a sequel to this, authors time permitting. 5 stars from me tho, thanks for writing and posting, cheers, Ppfzz.

A truly phenomenal story.

A Rugby boy? I'm not surprised the story is well written, although a Radleian could do it far better.

One of the better stories that I've read on here; I was lucky to run into it! I hope to see many more science fiction stories published under your name - hopefully soon!

(I gave to agree, however, that a few of the sex scenes began to feel out of place and repetitive; especially after the battle when one would expect grief, not lust.)

Well done indeed! I have read this story from start to finish, stopping only for food and drink, because once I started I could not stop - I HAD to read the next page, and the next, and the next, until there were none left unread. Now I must see what else you have written; I hope that there is more??

An excellent story. I read it almost nonstop

Apart from the five stars, most things I might mention have already been mentioned. I am just still a bit baffled about the imperial bit. Or should I see that more like Queen Victoria was Empress abroad and Queen at home?

Wow! What an awesome story you wrote. I'm not sure if it's the canadian that is surprising me since I'm mostly used to US/UK english but the vocabulary you used is phenomenal! Not to mention the military jargon... One thing that stood out like a sore thumb, the sex scenes. I get it that this is literotica and those bits are more or less a given, but when the sex scenes come up they seem to be very jarring and missplaced. Almost as if they were inserted as an afterthought. I admit that even before the waterfall scene I was skimmimg them and after I just skipped all others since they seemed more or less the same. Maybe if they differed from one another more or were conected to the surrounding context. But no matter. It's still 5/5 as a whole. Easily publishable if you haven't already :)

I can see by other readers comments that we all agree this was a well written and enjoyable story. You sir can spin a yarn !

Well told story, rich characters, superb pacing - the low point was the sex - not sure why, but your colorful and descriptive language when describing the environment and settings completely falls apart when it comes to the sex, to the point that the language was actually jarring to read! I had to skim/skip the sex. I suggest either working with an editor that can help with that, or just leaving them out as you continue to develop!

I was hooked, although I kind of wanted to have Thia suddenly end up pregnant and realize humans and medusans are biologically compatible. It can also bring about a new series, about Triom, the orphaned prince.