All Comments on 'Sex, Cheating and Romance Ch. 05'

time for new lifes. TK U MLJ LV NV

Good read sorry it's almost over. Thanks for sharing.

I was right and I was wrong. I figured Randy and Olivia would get together but I also thought that Randy wasn't the biological father. I'm glad I was wrong about that.

Now all we need ia a proper ending.

Have to admit that I did not think that Randy was a blood relative of Victoria and that the death of Sheila surprised me. The rest was right where I expected it. I would like to register my agreement with those who commented that the death

Sheila removed a lot of opportunities for tension and character development. Will there be any surprises for the last chapter?

Certainly I like it...

I have two small comments: the first...although the development of the story was fine, tension was missing. Perhaps the developments were too predictable As a story, its arc missed a high point. Its dramatic points were rather limited.

The second is more pointed: What's with Red Lobster? The 3 RLs I've been in (East Coast, focused around NJ) were noisy, which I can put up with if the food were excellent, but more important, the food was at best mediocre. As a place for a story setting, RL does not cut it when so many good and excellent restaurants exist. Maybe someone can explain RL's charm in storytelling?

Regards,

Bill (in NJ)

but the story lacked intrigue & emotion. Where's the part about Olivia being the one who killed her sister? Well, I'm sure you'll get to it.

I hope Olivia who seems so perfect had nothing to do with the murder of the two low lifes in this story. that would kill there love for each other and kill this stories happy ending..

Excellent story.

Never thought I would get all teary-eyed reading a story on Literotica, but you succeeded! Well done!!!

as copy editor to do a restaurant review in the middle of a DG Hear, MFG, story, so no comment on Red Lobster. I must assume that Randy Burke is unaccustomed to fine dining, and that his budget doesn't extend to the high-priced places.

Well told!!

Yes, you are one of the best authors, but this is not your best work. I agree with the perceptive comments by NeuroBill and in addition find the dialogue to be stiff and not natural, especially between Randy and Olivia. You display a couple of persistent errors in grammar, but one does not know whether that's from an attempt at a "natural, down-to-earth voice or is truly an error. I look forward to your next story.

I am never a big fan of stories where the cheating spouse suddenly dies. It's just hard to engage after that happens. I suspect Olivia was the trucks driver that night. Thanks for the offering.

hopefully it does what its intended to do TK U MLJ LV NV

Only mystery left is who killed Sheila. Not.sorry about the.cheating whore's death anymore. It saved a lot of grief for everyone.

Why on earth would Olivia, knowing the results, leave Randy stressed out by saying he needed to love the child regardless of who the father was? This was not a TV show, keeping the suspense and stress as high as possible for as long as possible. This was a woman relieving the concerns of the man she loved.

It ruined this part of the story imo.

Has caused the accident and did the hit and run?

Randy, you are the father! This might be the first time this ever happened in a LW story.

Excellent continuation. but there are a number of loose ends: Who was the driver of the pickup when it hit the bike? Will we eventually know how the pick up ended up behind the bar? God intrigue and suspense. Thx

5*

BJ

Remembering the previous chapters, I thought about this: the sisters quarreled before Sheila announced her pregnancy to Randy. Which means that Olivia probably knew about her sister's adventures on that "wild Saturday at the bar" and that the baby might not be from Randy. There is no other reason for the quarrel, because if Olivia had even hinted about her feelings for Randy, Sheila would have quickly banned her from seeing her man. So, the confrontation between the sisters because of jealousy disappears. Consequently, Olivia knew, but hid everything for the sake of her sister's happiness, but did not fail to speak out about the meanness and recklessness of Sheila's behavior.