All Comments on 'Sisters' Gift Pt. 01'

Hopefully Ch #2 will follow soon.

You don't write badly, but you'd benefit from an editor just to keep your story 'on track' and to eliminate the considerable amount of unneccessary information you included. Lots of tangents, and details that didn't contribute to the story, the characters, or the experience. Just helpful advice: If you step back to re-read the story and find paragraphs that could be eliminated without detracting from the story ...you can probably eliminate them.

Great story. This story could stand on its' own. I am curious as to what could happen in a second chapter, though.

Great story.

Thanks for the story, I enjoyed it.!

Thanks for writing!

Definitely 5*****!

God, this made me hot! I don't have a sister but I have a brother. We've been fucking since we were 18. He shoves his hard 7 1/2 inch cock into me at least twice a day and we fuck like fucking animals. He eats me ravenously. Loves my taste! He knows just where to put his tongue and lips to make me scream and scream. When I suck him off and he comes in my mouth I share it with him. We swap the come around until he kisses my tits and coats them with his lovely come. (I love his taste too!)

I hope it's apparent that we love each other like fucking crazy. We want to get married when we can move away from this town. What we WANT though is another woman who will make love to us, who eats come, who would like both of us to go down on her (it's understood that she'll go down on us.) She must be fairly young, but thirties would do. MUST LIKE COME. We'd treat her as a sister, a sister who likes to be fucked by men and women.

Write JJ @ PO Box smudhszschmudges... dam this computer is crasgiing...bluddy hewl.....vvsk..fucksu...helpp

Thanks for the story! Made up for the last one I read that seemed to have been written by someone using english as a third or fourth language, lol. It was murder on the eyes! ;)

I gave this a four, mostly because of two things; first it seemed rushed, not the story, more the timeline if that makes sense. Just seemed like it wasn't written in a manner that... Well I cant explain it without opening a second window and typing while I read along, sure its understandable though. Not a huge thing though.

The second deal is more of a personal annoyance. He is taking his sisters virginity... On the kitchen table.. I let that one go even though that seems kind of thoughtless for someones first time (shrug), now if it had been the other sister on the table that would have seemed totally in line! ...but the hang bit was him telling his other sister to sit on her face while he takes her virginity. That was just kind of lame; at this point in the story he didnt even know they fooled around with each other. Reguardless it seemed out of place while she was losing her virginity and kind of lessened/cheapened the moment. (Well maybe cheapened isnt the right word but...)

Other than that and a few niggly points I really liked the story! Always enjoy stories with a guy and sisters and especially when the author doesnt shit them up with parents catching them or getting into the sex. Its used a lot but I like the dead/passed on or abandoned by parents beginning to clear the plotline.

Looking forward to more writing, thanks!

I wonder Mike ever wrote a single paragraph.