All Comments on 'Star Studded Pt. 01'

Nice

I gave it an I Hated It ⭐rating. This tale has so much potential as I read the first 2 pages it had an Excellent Read ⭐⭐⭐⭐ rating. Many of your products have received Excellent Read ⭐⭐⭐⭐ and Outstanding Read ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ ratings from me. I enjoy consuming your writings. Because of that I wanted to make sure I gave you’re the reason for this one receiving the low rating.

1. My ratings are just my opinions on a particular tale or segment of a series of tales.

2. This tale while having a great concept for the journey you created the repeating of the second page as the major portion of the third page threw it for a loop. I spent time as I was reading trying to figure out if it was a rethought on Lee’s part.

3. I do not remember reading any of your tales having an error like this. It changed my whole mindset on the tale.

These are my issues not yours. I understand cut and paste errors. Heck, I did it putting this comment together. But the reason for me generating the rating was the frustration created by the error.

I’m a very slow reader and the fact that you broke the tale into smaller segment was great for me being able to consume your products. That is a great plus for me to be able to enjoy your efforts in writing.

Even with the frustration I felt with the error, I am looking forward to the remaining parts of this tale being published. You have created a good production and are weaving it in a manner to intrigue us consumers.

Thank you for your creations and this whole series, which I am sure to enjoy the final products as they are published.

Keep Writing

JH4Fun

MY previous comment may be off and should be deleted. I just went back and reread pages 2 and 3. I am at a loss as to find the repeating portion. I apologize for the comment.

JH4Fun

Don't blow this story up like the astronaut story or drag on forever.

Three chapters of repetition seems to be this author’s MO! In this installment it’s the heroine blubbering and mashing her teeth over a long past event and her faithful husband doing his best to hold her tight as she constantly leaks tears. Chapter two will most likely hammer home this same scenario while the third chapter reaches an under whelming conclusion.

Not feeling this one so far

Having read your other works and having been let down by the constant repetition, I see we are looking at another. Unless the famous 'A' lister was Rod Serling and this is another adventure in the 'Twilight Zone', I don't see how having dated a star would be any different than any other person, unless she built a shrine in her head that she can't escape, ie: the twilight zone.

Nice one CL, your getting there with story writing. 3 pages, first chapter not as repetitive as been in previous stories when you try to get a point across. You also state a 3 chapter story- bravo for that, and i am sincere. You write very well. your creative, and your stories get deep where character emotions are concerned. Well done sir!

The way is a mess. The way she’s defending her very public secret only worsens his speculation.

This is already too long for the premise.

Confusing. Seems like she feels that she is better off baffling him with her bullshit than showing any kind of sense about the whole thing. I don't see a logical way forward for her. He won't put up with that shit for long. The way she is going she might as well go ahead and pack his suitcases for him right now.

It looks like a big chunk of text got copied and pasted to the back end of this chapter.

/

That error aside, I just don't understand the premise of this story. So she dated someone famous. So what? Either she's surrounded by complete morons, or, as Lee himself surmises at some point, she's got psychological issues and is completely unhinged in her reaction to anyone finding out about her prior relationship.

/

Also, why, instead of stewing on things until he starts to drive himself crazy, wouldn't Lee just do some quick google searches to get answers. Obviously, the info is out there, since the neighbors foiund it. Any rational person would just do some basic research rather than imagining random scenarios.

This just seems a bit overdramatized.

Your stories are starting to be the same. Wife has a secret and goes on and on for chapters.

Repeated section, but interesting storyline.

WTF page 3 is just repeating page 2 several times................

The only exasperation taking place was when the writer would finally get to the point instead of repeating again and again, the same thought process. I'm now at a stage that I'm not sure if I even want to know who this original "Hollywood" star was, what she did for him and why it had such an effect.

The imagination of her husband about the who/what/why etc is far more debilitating than any actual event. Did she meet up with a certain Governor of California, indulge in a mass orgy for 1 week solid with hundreds of guys, perhaps get rogered by a herd of horses!!! Frankly, I've lost interest.

the story seems to repeat around the time Lee drinks his coffee. I'm guessing you don't have an editor.

Not sure if you used an editor, but if you did, don’t use them again. Page 3 was an extreme disappointment. I’m getting real tired of reading the long drawn out story of “ooh I love you, you’re the best, I never loved him, you would change if you found out, I’m being cryptic so it’s destroying you, but love me please, don’t ask questions, ask short question…” blah blah blah. The husband should just pack a bag and say, “if you don’t trust me, fuck you.” Get on with the story.

10 Big Blazing Stars for Mr. CL for another heart wrenching story! Wow, thank you so much for a new edition of gut wrenching, brain twisting, and emotional torment as you continue to bring to life imaginaery characters larger than life. LOL You are great sir. I am glad to see that this will only be 3 chapters to sweat and impatiently wait to be published unlike some of your previous stories. LOL I find your tales to be so intense, so heart breaking , and very interesting that I would NOT be surprised that your real name is "Clive Cussler". Buster2U

Verboseness will not lead to the Nobel Prize in literature.

Based on prior stories by this guy I not reading or voting until all chapters are done. That way I can skim through them all and save a lot of time.

The reactions to fame in this tale reflect a teeny bopper’s views of it. Good grief, the wife needs to get a grip, her friends do, too, and he husband has access to the internet, look it up and tell wife it doesn’t matter. None of it seems realistic. I have a friend who was involved with someone famous. No one gives a great goddamn, except to goof on it on rare occasion. Wife’s intense focus on hiding and fearing her past association, though the author has worked hard with the vampire analogy, is really the reaction that makes it more than it is. If she dismissed it as nothing, saying it was overblown and she never got to know him, people would move on.

Choppedliver's stories are like reading unintentional parody.

It's almost painful at this point.

I get it, you know a lot of words

I'm just here to vote a 1* because you can't seem to get it through your thick skull that less is more. You're not impressing anyone with your long, drawn-out storylines with endless, unnecessary dialogue and meandering story progression. Do EVERYONE a favor and get an editor. Trust me, you need one.

So far the theme is, anything worth doing is worth overdoing. That apparently includes the telling of this yarn.

Piss poor. She keeps a public secret from her husband for no particular reason other than to cause a rift in the marriage and then frets about it. What an insanely stupid premise. Unless the famous guy was John Holmes and she did porn with him, taking that foot long sausage up the ass, why be concerned about something that happened years before she met her husband. Sooooo fucking stupid.

Interesting plot idea, but the story ends up wallowing in endless repetition of "feelings" over an issue that isn't troublesome enough to merit endless handwringing. The result is boredom, and it also makes the story mawkish.

Another unrealistic exxagerated psychological introspective tale, with the usual cheating manipulative slut wife and the immature, almost childish, idiot husband, likely going to the usual ending RAAC.

Annoying, generally pathetic and misses the only real part of any story, an ending which I hope we can all consider it has... ended, like a bad cold or a hospital stay! It certainly doesn't deserve a star rating it's all clouds and no stars

Unless it was truly salacious, this seems like something that gets disclosed in the first couple of dates. Just a lot of unnecessary angst.

I'm guessing page 3 is supposed to be the fulfillment of her prophecy that everybody who learns she dated somebody famous changes and becomes obsessed with it. Unless it's just poor editing?

Either way, I can't bring myself to like it or even find it particularly clever because she has just become so unlikeable, with her constant insistence without revealing anything.

Don't know if I'll give part2 a look yet or not.

This story is both pointless and unnecessary

Another story too stupid to finish. Both the premise and the execution were fails.

Too much repeating of the same lines. Character talks in circles without making any sense. Already too long and this only part one. Don't know how this story got past the editors but it should end very quickly. Rated it a one!

Sorry but that was dull. It was drawn out and repetitive (never mind that page 3 was essentially a repeat of page 2). The author was trying to make readers feel the drama and angst that Gwen was feeling but it didn’t feel real. She came across a bit of a delusional drama wueen

Probably because the reader didn’t know who the ex was. I’m sure the author was attempting a dramatic introduction of this fact at some point. I’m guessing though had it been disclosed early in the story, the scoring would have been higher. You might have lost a good portion of your audience already.

Surprise, surprise! From the most exasperating author I've ever read comes this refreshing tale. At least on page one; page 2 seemed to bog down in his typical unending pursuit of wringing every nuance out of every thought possible. Scratch page 3- it's just a mistake, repeating page 2. This one has promise, altho 2 more chapters is scary. And no, I don't see how a short fling with a famous person would have such an earth shattering effect on her life.

Please don’t publish the other two installments of this story. Rework this one down to 750 words and start from there. My eyes bled.

Another sh#t story from a sh#t author your storylines suck and your writing is 3rd grade

Sorrrryyy, 1 star. No way I can raise it to even 2. Spent 3 pages reading that Gwen had this big secret that she somewhat, but not fully, told her girlfriends but not her husband. So he's running blind & she doesn't seem to trust him to tell him what she did... or whatever. She told him towards the end of this chapter that she told him the gist, but not only didn't I read it, looking back I couldn't find it!

I will NOT be reading the last 2 parts of this story. I wasted 20 min. or so reading this & getting nothing from it. Yes, 1 star sums up my feelings. Bob

You did a cut/paste thing here where a whole section was repeated?

The h is a bit TOO wimpy to be honest. Seems codependent instead of loving.

An interesting concept. But to be honest, like for splashdown, it’s way too repetitive sometimes

Oh my God this is repetitive, even without the obvious cut-and-paste error. So long and drawn out, all the melodramatic over-elaboration adds nothing to the story. Get to the damn point already.

Sorry but you desperately need an editor. The same crap was beaten to death over and over until the reader just gets sick of it. You also repeated an entire section but bad cut and paste. One star is generous.

You bullshit so much that you repeat whole sections of the story and don't even catch it. I'm done with this one.

I am afraid that the eponym Choppedliver was misspelled and should correctly be Clickbait.

Trying to muddle through this story was like hiking through three feet of fresh powder without the benefit of snowshoes or walking across a mud flat with the tide out and all you can do is just keep slogging before the water rushes back in your up to your neck in it! But worse is that it is like a YouTube video that promises some kind of exciting information about a subject that could be dispensed in 30 seconds but the video is designed to stretch out the tidbit for 15 minutes. It's like watching the TV show 'Lost'.

Dude, the way this part went made me want to bitch slap you and his wife. Your trying to build up the big reveal, but by the time you do its going to be such a let down. Try making your stories a little bit smoother and just write them as they come. Quit, with the dramatic build up.

A game of "Truth or Dare"; but I don't see where anyone knew what the truth was that Gwen was so adamant about not revealing. Surely, she could have come up with something else to keep the hens at bay.

Is this an AI thing?

Don’t keep us hanging for 4 more chapters.

Repeated 3 or 4 times with no end.

UGH! I gave up before the end of page 2, she is too melodramatic! 2 pages of her continually HIDING something from who she claims is part of her soul. Pathetic really, part of her soul but no trust in him? No respect FOR him? Just repeatitive drivel I have no intention of finishing.

You've had some good stories, but the last few, not so much.

Lots of words but she says nothing of substance

Noooooooooooooooooo!

I found one of your stories again.

Pages and pages of a couple in love torturing each other because of what they can't say.

Realised what it was and who the author was 3/4rs through the first page.

You are unique, after making a mistake I don't mark or comment on part complete stories, but you get a comment and 1 star.

You are a very talented writer, but please try to plough a different field. These stories are just repetition on the same form of misery.

This wasn't a fucking story. It was worse than clickbait..I'll NOT be reading ANY thing you post!

Hate it!!

I sort of get this, but also don't, it is so wordy, so repetitive it dragged to me, sorry I can see you put a lot of work into this.

Page 3 repeats starting about halfway down.

All angst and drama. No action, no substance.

Good god someone get those ppl to a shrink or an asylum or drugs or all of the above

Different. Interesting, but overwrought.