by PacoFear
Nice story, but seems a bit contrived and clinical -- and needless to say, is drawn out a bit much. Still I liked it and one can jump to the end and then go back and read the rest.
Great story and well written, not intended for a quick fix. Keep up the good work.
Ignore the weaklings PacoFear. You are a fine writer. A paced, well-written, story, building realistically and with intense eroticism. Well done.
Both the story and the writing are excellent; both are rare here. I am amazed at others' comments; maybe brother/sister sex does not ring their bells. The wryly intellectual language was entertaining and refreshing.
As much as you obviously care about writing, I should mention that "...wreak of her arrousal..." and "...taught smooth flesh..." are both incorrect. The words are "reek" and "taut."
A couple of calls from the parents would have brought things back to earth momentarily so that the flights of fancy would be more exhillarating, but that is a minor matter.
i liked it alot. im not into incest, but the story is more than that. and very well written.
Fantastic Story, very well written. You had me captivated the whole way through. Don't listen to the critics, keep writing, you're very good at it. I look forward to a sequel.
I was wondering about a Hero update before I saw this. A fitting sub, like I said very good story. Cheers. -- UK CYNIC
I loved the buildup, and the culmination of the sister's schemes. Of course, the way she was described, her brother might still have caved if he 'had' been gay.
One of the better sibling incest tales I've encountered on this site. Thanks for sharing it.
This was hot, tender, romantic....just lovely. Thank you. I loved it!
I appreciate the kind words. To Anonymous: thanks for catching the phonetic typos. I end up with them too often because I write by sound. It's one of the reasons I end up with my own peculiar little goofy rhythm. (My friends tease me that they can spot my writing in 2 paragraphs.) I missed the typos this time because I did a descriptive re-write after my last edit and never edited again. Dumb. To UK CYNIC: I promise I haven't forgotten you (or the other folks reading Hero's Life). I'm writing the next three chapters all together. Let's just say you'll love me, then you'll hate me, then you'll love me again. To all: one question I'll throw out to anybody who feels like answering - was anyone surprised that Jessica turns out to be a virgin? The half-dozen friends who read it were evenly divided on "totally obvious" and "never saw it coming." Just curious how you guys break down. Thanks again gang!
I seriously can't remember the last time I read a story like this, good job. What are the chances of a sequel?
To RedDevil: Never say "never" but I wanted this as one tight self-contained thing. I'm juggling my original multi-chapter monster right now.
I thought that and after checking the opening I assumed she would want him first. The mention of a lack of any recent boyfriend was a factor too. Re the previous anon comment I actually thought he summed up the plot pretty well, just a pity he didnt seem to like it. Dont know what else was expected from an incest story? Glad to hear about your Hero plans. Cheers. -- UK CYNIC
I'm not usually into incest but I enjoyed this story. I really liked the relationship they had and the stolen kisses game. Definitely knew she was a virgin from their first encounter when she wouldn't let him move his fingers. I was surprised that she didn't want him to break her in, though. In an intimate story like this, it was slightly jarring and distant. Regardless, I liked it. I'm going to have a look at your other stories now.
Impressive, dare I say perfect. I agree whole-heartily with your post script assessment. And it worked.
to unrealistic for my tastes no guy would put up with a sister that was constantly teaseing him and hinting he was gay he would get pissed at her tell her to go to hell and find a way to move out or atleast stay away as much as possible and when home stay locked in his room he sure wouldn't ever screw her keep it atleast sounding believable
I enjoyed your story AND the post script as well... I agree with your perspective.
I loved how developed the story is... the deep connection is important in any story or any romance. Thank you for this one.
What an amazing bit of writing this is! There are so many wonderful little character details in there, but the story never gets bogged down with them. It flows effortlessly. My only regret is that I can't give it more than 5 stars. I'm very much looking forward to reading the rest of your work.
"Stolen," my ass! They are eagerly given as the sex builds to SUPERMAX HEAT. It's hot sex, but also gentle and truly affectionate, at once deeply honest and craftily deceptive, something brand new and yet based on an entire life of shared experiences, feelings, and endless joshing. ("You're gay." "Oh, yeah, well you are Little Tits, the wannabe slut.") Without the splendidly fabricated banter between the two lovers, the whole story would collapse like a pin-pricked balloon. But it does hold together as a 5-Star tale. Thanks for a wonderful ride!
The sister is a very intriguing character--she's got a personality that's provocative while also feeling true to a little sister's annoying/teasing/affectionate relationship to her older brother. Rare to see and very well done.
This is fantastic! Character development worthy of a professional, a build that made me savor all of six pages, and just enough sweetness to leave a lasting impression.
And, sweet Mother Macree, that was hot. :D Well done, sir!
Really nice. My personal distaste for rim jobs are all that's getting in the way of me personally giving it 5/5, but, that's just me.
You did say he maxed the SAT's and completed a BS in 3 and then you made us forget it. You made the characters real.
Excellent ending... I didn't even have an inkling it was coming.
Thanks!
much I love this! Your characters are so fantastic!! Incest stories are a guilty pleasure... and when I like them this much it makes me feel so dirty. Keep up the great writing.
Great fuckin' story. Your characters are excellent, and the buildup was supreme. The kissing game was a clever vehicle too. Thanks!
I love your stories. The long slow buildup is a big turn on. And even though it's not believable in a literal sense, it's believable as a story, which is good enough for me.
Thanks for sharing!
-Carl
Man, if I ever get to write a story as good as that I will be one happy fella.
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
You drew me in to the sibling's story of closeness, which became sexual. This is a must read for everyone.
Wonderful story. Great, compelling characters and I love the interplay in their relationship. Some serious talent here man.
Hats off to the author for a wonderful story filled with humor, great dialogue and two highly engaging siblings. More stories such as this one would be very welcome.
i couldn't even get a thrid of the way down the first page it was so bad. no guy is going to put up with her constant teasing and infering that he is gay he would avoid all contact with her until he went to college even going so far as to talk his parents into letting him go early then he would stay there never to return keep it realistic and within the boundries of human nature please
this is a fine story so i can only imagine the person who left the prior comment is what? an ex wife or girlfriend. To anyone who is in any doubt its good- read it. -- UK CYNIC
I’ve got my egalitarian leanings, but it’s a bit difficult for my feelings to be hurt by a commenter who: (1) can’t find a shift key; (2) can’t write a complete sentence; (3) can’t spell “third” or “boundaries” or “inferring”; and (4) can't grasp the difference between inferring something and implying it anyway. Let’s see, did I miss anything? Chime in on the dufus below if you like folks. The best thing to do with the village idiot is form a circle around him and then point and laugh.
i really liked this story, it reminded me a bit of 'words on skin' but that was great too so im not complaining. Keep up the good work!
Please don't laugh too hard at the idiot below. Some people need help and understanding instead of ridicule. Poor thing, he/she/it couldn't even complete an entire sentence...
<p>
Nice tale though, and well written. Lots of fun to read. Thank you author.
Your writing seems so recognizable on these incest stories but your other writing seems as though done by another person altogether. Are you sure you are writing all these? "Stolen Kisses" and "Words on Skin" are just GREAT! But they are written so differently from the other laundry list of stories. Sweet, sensitive, and so very sexy, unlike your "Hero" stories of which I'm still trying to complete even ONE.
Well keep it up. Maybe I'll go back and see what my problem is and write you again....
For "Anony Chris": Here's an example of why it's fun to be me - I can tease out a compliment lurking in the background of your comment. Yes, I wrote all of these stories. And, yes, they are different. WoS and SK, which are similar in many ways, including that they're both written in third person POV, differ from my others which are largely 1st person POV. They *should* sound different and I'm glad you thought they did. Dear sweet Anony, just because you don't like something doesn't mean it "sucks" - just as your comment doesn't "suck." Find something in it you can appreciate. You know, like I just did. :)
Paco Fear, your stories are great!
And your comments on 'Hrrrm' were right on target
Great writing, and i agree with most of the others in that this and "Words on Skin" seem much better in terms of depth and plot than some of your others. The Hero stories are okay, but those two almost seem in a different league
The first of your stories I read was Words on Skin. This is the second and I'm glad to say it didn't disappoint. :D
Why are we here...but for you to make us "SQUEAM"! You've done a bang up job, too, by GOLLY! Excellent prose, my friend.
Great writing and soo Hott..... I've read a couple Hero stories and this was just as good... might want to here from these two characters again... any chance?
I enjoyed this, especially the cunning of your female protagonist, but I just couldn't get behind the breast enlargement, or the fact I just liked your Dingo girl better. Still a hot read!
Great writing again, and i agree with most of the others in that this and "Words on Skin" are your best work. Fabulous, keep writing and I'll keep reading!
This is the second (but definitely not last) of your stories I've read. They are brilliant stories. You really make the characters seem real. They have personalities. They're not quite interchangable. Kudos to you and keep them coming.
This is the third (but definitely not last) of your stories I've read. They are brilliant stories. You really make the characters and motivations seem real. Each of the characters have distinct personalities and are truely likable. I would love to see another story maybe telling how they dealt with the end of the summer when their parents returned or a couple of years down the road.
...well, never. I don't write sequels for my sibling stories. For me, the magic and tension are expended when they surrender to their romantic/taboo desires. It's up to you guys to picture the ho-hum details of everyday life that follow.
I have to date read most of your stories and I have to say Thank You. Fantastic characters and plot. You put a part of yourself in every story you write and it is clearly evident. *smiles*
This is a very well woven tale. Anonymous posters often crack me up. Especially the haters. It makes it very hard to take them seriously when they can't even be bothered to come up with a fake name to direct reply comments to.
From a critical standpoint I would have liked to have been in Winston's head a little bit more. I would have liked to "hear" how he was justifying some of his actions, even before the sponge bath. I also think the "doctor's orders" might have raised a flag with a first year nursing student. Maybe not, as I don't actually know any to ask at the moment.
Still though, I thought the pacing was just about right and sex scenes were hawt as hell. (That's why we're here right?) :)
paco, ive read words on skin and this story and they are some what alike, im glad u do storys like this cause they make the right mix of a good read while getting my all worked up, thanks man!
Long story, but it was definitely worth reading until the end. One of the best incest stories I've read here. Great job!
awesome story. i love the intimacy u build between ur characters. it feels genuine. keep up the good work
Very nice story. Jess was a scheming wonder here. Good for Winston, hehe. It's a pitty we wouldn't get to read them get into action once her breasts are healed. I like big breasts, but I clearly favor natural ones, hehe. Thanks a lot for providing us with a story so very well written.
nice story man, but the girl is just a little... sneaky. Oh and that last part the immovabke object and irrestitable force was good. Nice story all around.
What an amazing story! You are quite the talented writer. I love love loved the slow build up, the pretense of innocence. That's what got me really wet. Can't wait to read more.
I really enjoyed this story i was sorry it ended I hope you write another chapter about them i have several ways this story could go in my head.Thanks for the reading enjoyment.Keep up the good work.
Wow!! Loved it. Was sorry to reach the end. Very good story. look forward to reading more! Keep up the good work!
Im a huge fan of Literotica, I would say, of all the stories I have read, this is the best. It was so perfect in building the story, I wish if I had a big brother like that to satisfy me, nice story, keep up the good work
Really fantastic. One of the few who can write about sex with tenderness love and consideration for one,s partner and still write erotica. More please
second story of yours i read,, this one was much better alot harder to perdict the plots although i gathered she was still a virgin when she said only 1 and half inches
although that story was amazing keep writing theses ill keep an eye on yours
a favour please,, i like the brother sister incest storys and 6 pages seems good length could you write more like this please they are very good to read
leebrookes@live.com
I found this to be sweet, sensual, and highly intoxicating. Very few people seem to be able to capture lust, romance, tenderness, and even filthiness into one short story, but you did it beautifully. Kudos!
I don't, as a rule, enjoy incest stories. Not even sure how I ended up here, but once I was here, the story carried it. Beautiful! Thank you for sharing; I hope it opens a lot of minds about love in another of its true and varied guises. Please keep writing! You have a great gift.
I was so glad you left out the redundancy present in almost any other story of the genre and not labour the inner dialogue, bluntly revealing her ultimate desire every paragraph. We're all adults and we can figure things out on our own from time to time. Too bad it's the rare artist who acknowledges it. Plus it kind of helps that we aren't 100% sure if she's wanting the whole enchilada, or is just using him a bit. For brevity's sake, I am also glad there weren't any competing interests (e.g. girlfriends) to add to or cut material from the story. This kind of relationship build-up almost seems to require a kind of 'time out' from the rest of the world; and it was quite cleverly done. Thanks for a great story.
I absolutely loved this story! So well thought out and nicely developed, such great dialogue, and the history between them is the perfect touch. ^.^ Adding this to my favorites. ^.-
This was a good length not too short also for me that clever stolen kisses game is brilliant for a little sister ploy!
I love that sneaky character i hope we see others like her. Also thanks for not making her tits 2 big. Some of us guys like smaller ones even if I'm the minority. Thanks again
Great story, You are great at writing these kind of stories, I would love to see some more :)
Only part I didn't like of this story, was the vibrator through the hymen.. I kinda wished it had been Winston instead.. Oh well.. still a great story..
only been a member of literotica for a few months,,,,find i really enjoy these incest stories as written by you and nikki,,,quite immersed in them,,,surprising to me!!
this story was a fun read,,not too long,,just right!!
thank you!
It's hard at times to write an incest story and keep it both believable and romantic. You have manged this with this story and your other one, "Words on Skin". I truly enjoyed your stories both in your build up and in your character development. I wouldn't mind seeing more of either story, but I think that has more to do with me being a sap than with there being anywhere to take them.
Still laughing here...Nice one !!
Well thought out,and it worked great for my simple mind :-)
...got anymore like that one ?
I've read two PacoFear's stories. Loved them both. The writing, short of three trained editors, is nearly flawless. The actual story is compelling and transports the reader into a another world, enough to rival any novel I've every read. I also love the fact that when reading the story you get something lost to most pornographic tales, A FUCKING STORY! After the second page I wasn't reading for sex, I was reading because I was interested in the characters lives. All in all, very well done and not for the intellectually sterile.
This story was just ok for me. You write very well, but honestly, your female character got on my nerves. She kept calling Winston gay which is just down right mean.
I first read Words on skin and I thought that you had just gotten lucky and struck gold with such an amazing story. But then I read this and was captivated by it. I'd really appreciate it if you made more stories like these. Their amazing your amazing at this and you've got to start writing your own novels. I'd pay good money to read a lengthy story like this. I look forward to your next story
I've read Outsourcing Anal several times and found it to be witty and very erotic. This was my first foray into another of your stories and I just couldn't stop reading. You really delveloped the characters and the emotion of the story and I loved sharing their adventure.
Now I'm going to have to go and read the rest of them.
Thanks for the great work!
Chas
Again u amaze me with another story. this story was very good as well i loved how she planned everything out. i love it.
I very much enjoyed reading this story. I love good love stories wherever I encounter them. The beauty of the love stories on Literotica is that they contain in explicit form the sexual components of a love story that usually must be at least partially suppressed to make it "appropriate" for a general audience.
And incest also is most of the time a completely forbidden subject in stories aimed at general audiences. But even though it actually occurs pretty rarely in reality (I think!), I don't find it objectionable. If woven into a love story skillfully, it can actually provide a genuine enhancement to the plot.
Overall, I think that your beautiful articulation of a terrific plot really makes this a first rate story. Thank you for taking the considerable trouble of bringing your vision into clear focus and making it available to your readers. I will continue to follow your writing in hope of discovering future gems like this one.
Thank you!
Superb job. The fact that I keep coming back to your work and reading Stolen Kisses and Words on Skin for maybe the 10th time in the past year indicates that you truly know what literotica is about. Your stories are creative, original, humorous, and filled with that spark that essential rare drop of undying love. I hope you write more brother/sister stories and I am lucky enough to stumble upon another gem.
I agree whole-heartedly with prashant1225, I come back here, abit more then once a month just to re-read this and Words on Skin. Your work is absolutely amazing.
Awesome job, very well written and it didnt seem like 6 pages. It just flew by, wouldnt mind a sequel too, kind of sad it ended, i would love more. Overall, great job and superb writing.
Simply amazing. Reading your great story and these terrific characters makes the few short stories I've written seem incredibly trite. Thank you for writing one of my favorite stories in a long, long time.
Its scares me how much I like your incest stories... you make it seem so natural and right, I feel the inner conflict the characters feel!
Every one of your stories is wonderful- the characterization, the love, the awesome beyond belief fruition. Please write more; you have a real gift and your stories are the first erotica I've really loved.
Wonderful use of words.
Shame it's over...or is it ?
Thank you for a terrific story.
I am a fan of your work, detailed and descriptive and deliberately tortuous. All I ask is that there be more of this particular section of your work so I can continue to sing your praises, thank you very much.
Dearest PacoFear,
It's been more than 2 years and 10 months since you finished this story: over 272,000 views. Like Jess with Tunny, we readers will have (must have) our way with you (even if we have to be sneaky and "scheme-y" about it); as you comment about the knife fighters, we ARE tied to you.
In this genre in particular, you shine. "Words on skin," "Macallan promises," and "Stolen kisses" are engaging, hmm, no, enchanting - nope, not that either...ah, that feels right: enthralling pieces (and from your ratings, others agree!).
Please, please, give us just a little taste more, just the equivalent of a cuddle so we can savor your writing?
Please, Tunny? Please...
I love the little cute games you give the brothers and sisters! Well wrote! And the sex was hot! The anal mmmm...
Virgin and on the pill for a year? lol
Great job! Keep it up!
your afterward on incest is as good of a description most of us are ever going to get. I've never had sexual feelings for blood family members(but step-sisters? thats a whole 'nother ball game.:) ) and i'm certain most cases end badly. Once read a psychology essay about it and only when both parties are truly ok with the incest is no one hurt. (but then you have family members who might object and the secrecy involved with that... yada yada yada.. )
I'd leave a longer comment but I've been reading your stories for 4.5 hours... time for bed now.
5/5 again. :) This time the sex descriptions were long enough :)
i normally do not look at the authors name when i choose a story, the brief synopsis and they are brief ! is usually what piques my interest. making the connection to other stories of yours, words... mccallen... which i heartily enjoyed, brings this story into perspective. marvelous story, kudos to you!
i now retire to your imagination factory! thank you in advance for sharing yours with ours.
lee