All Comments on 'Sylvia's Mom Pt. 01'

Good start off, waiting for the next chapter.

girooster, thanks for your comment and your interest. The first chapter (Part 1) was intentionally kept reasonably nonsexual. Subsequent chapters will be far more graphic and descriptive. Parts 2 and 3 are awaiting approval by admin. Hopefully, they will be published in the next few days.

This is a novel so expect it to be lengthy (70,000 words or so). Most likely, 20 and possibly even more chapters. The first seventeen parts are already written and are being edited prior to submission for publication.

The beginning of a story isn't a story. I just wasted five minutes of my life.

Sylvia's Mother was done by D.C. Roi, I hope you have premission to do a rewrite....

I appreciate your comment and concern about the two series of stories having similar names. I assure you "Sylvia's Mom" is not a rewrite of "Syvlia's Mother." I was not even aware of the existence of "Sylvia's Mother" until you brought it to my attention.

While I have not had the time to read the series, I do not believe D.C. Roi will accuse me of plagiarism.

I am sure you must be aware that titles of stories, books, movies, songs, etc. are not subject to the same copyright regulations and laws as are applied to the actual content of the material contained therein.

I trust that had there been any suspicion of literary impropriety on my part by the administrative reviewers on this site my story would have been rejected.

Thank you, again, for both your vigilance and your comment.

To all readers of my work. Your comments, either positive or negative, are gratefully welcomed as they will help me to become a better writer. As this is my first attempt at writing for other than my own entertainment, obviously, I have much to learn.

Thank you for your encouragement.

Sorry but this is just a jumble of ideas crammed onto a single page. needs body and structure.

I suppose your comment explains why I was never able to get an A in Composition while I was in college. Too much beer and too many Frat parties may have been contributing factors.

Perhaps I should just give up and go back to just reading and "wanking", but I never got an A in Quitting either so I think I will keep writing. If only one reader likes my work that is enough encouragement for me to continue trying to improve.

I still see babies crawling before they learn to walk. Most of them are encouraged when they take their first step. After all, "The longest journey begins with a single step." I do not recall the source of that quote.

Thank you for reading my story. I apologize for it not being up to your standards. I would love to read some of your writing. I'm sure I could learn a lot by reading it.

Excellent.......You know you want Sheila as your lover.......please continue......don't worry about what some people have to say......Its your first time......please continue

Your comment is deeply appreciated. I will be adding more material as frequently as I can. I try to write for the enjoyment of readers. Hopefully, my writing skills will improve with time and experience.

Readership and criticism (positive or negative) keeps me striving to be a better writer.

Thanks for your positive support.

I enjoyed your story, but it felt a little rushed. Several times it was like the plot hit a fast forward button and then slowed down. I think I know where you are going with the plot, but don't be in such a hurry. Slow the seduction down. I look forward to future entries

I appreciate your advice and I will keep that in mind for future entries. I am not a young man anymore but I suppose I was thinking like one..."To hell with the seduction, I just want to fuck, NOW!" LOL

Thanks so very much.

Absolutely amazing story. This is so fucking horny and erotic. Can't wait for some more of it.

I appreciate your comment very much and I assure you more of this story will be forthcoming. Please stay tuned. Hopefully, my writing skills will improve. There are a lot of writers on this website who are far more skillful than I so I read their work and try to learn from it. If there is only one person who enjoys reading my work, I will continue to write just for that him or her.

"Mrs. McDonald was raised in a very strict family who believed that every girl should be a virgin when she got married. She had decided to raise Sylvia in the same manner."

Religious upbringing, so far so good. But then she runs around in a skin tight top without a bra and daisy dukes? And she decides to seduce her daughter's boyfriend after she said that going steady is basically like being married?

I'd like to read Michael banging them both and then some and red is one of my top ten hair colors, but if a main character is that implausible I'd rather stop right here and not read any further.

Greetings G

Now let’s see just how really good this storyline gets..5 stars

I love the slow but heated build up. 5/5

You need to learn to write your dialog in the same manner as we Americans speak. We say "I don't" most of the time, not "I do not". There is a casualness to the way we speak in normal circumstances, but you seem to prefer stuffy, cramped and uncomfortable speech....it ruins the story for me, and I'm sure a lot of others as well. Just relax, and imagine you're having the conversation yourself as you write.

A good solid foundation on which to build a story

To anonymous from 2 years ago.

Many authors/writers on this site DO NOT follow the lazy American idioms, many are using proper English as they are taught in language schools were the language is taught as a second or third language. Consider how your sloppy American English sounds and reads to one who was taught English in Australia, Canada or the Caribbean islands, never mind those from countries that have never had English as a primary language.