All Comments on 'Ten Day Cruise'

why does this stop in the middle of a sentence?

It looks interesting

Story stopped in the middle of a sentence . like it so far but some of it is missing ......

Got a good story going, why did it end in the middle of a sentence? Did your computer have a brain fart when posting?

Please continue the story. It is very exciting and I can't wait for the next one.

I gave you a 4; but I don't care much for stories that drag everything out. they become boring very quickly.

can not wait untill they are naked with each other they will hopefully have a lot of fun with their bodys Glen wants to have his sister bad

Like the pacing and the story line except for parents not telling kids about clothing optional part until after on cruise - could have told them and let them struggle with idea of going or not ... but please keep writing.

Contrary to Ten Bears, I like how this story shows the sibs slowly becoming used to the idea of nudity, still nervous about it being with each other, thinking of nudity and sex as being the same thing, automatically. I suppose they will decide to try it on in their stateroom, maybe on the balcony, and then with their new friends, and then...

the thought of what is going to happen gave me chills

the only problem is that it ended where it did,please continue ASAP

Two pages to say nothing, about par for most of the sub-standard writers on this site. This 'story' is boring, pointless and endlessly dull, why don't you go and write articles for needlepont magazines?

hey kids try this new koolaid. ohhh by the way it has arsenic in it ooops too late

Well written and interesting so far but the sudden stop during day 2 of a story called ten day cruise makes me think gremlins are at work.

Hopefully this is a work in progress, and the author simply forgot to add the [WIP] disclaimer...

So far I found the story appealing and fairly well done, but the ending sire needed some additional effor

nice build up. good pacing. I like what I've read so far.

The idea of M&D surprising them with a clothing optional cruise is a little far fetched but it does give a reason for what I hope is a great deal of good sex to come.

Like where the story is headed, perhaps our young siblings will learn to swap with Jenny and Brad? But having the story end mid-sentence suggests there was supposed to be more here that got lost in transmission or something... Like others, I hope we'll get to see the rest of the story and further installments as the cruise progresses.

Thank you for reading my story, Ten Day Cruise.

The original posting was incomplete. I have resubmitted the story and now all parts are available.

I hope you enjoy the story.

Dark Vision

I'm only on page 7 and I already skipped ahead to rate it a 5

This is one of the best stories That I have ever read on Literotica. A definite 5

The pacing was well done and the sex was hot. The slow transition to them switching was a great idea and made the story even better. I loved it and continued to read it all the way to the end. Keep up the great work with future stories :)

This story held my interest...just had to read it all the way through to the end...loved everything about it!!!

Top story. A very horny and erotic read. I thought they may end up sharing with Mum and Dad. Now that would have been interesting.

Top story if you should ever put the 2 Mums and Dads in the next trip it would make it more intresting.

Maybe the best story yet on Literotica, but a real novel. 'Took me 2 days to read the revised version, but well worth it. Wouldn't it be great if people really were as open and accepting as the 2 families here. But I'm a bit surprised that none of the kids wanted to try it with their parents - maybe on the next cruise. And, even though I'm not into gay, I wonder that Glen and Brad didn't try a little experiment of the sort, seeing the girls getting it on so happily. It would have kind of fit into the mood of the time. 'Don't think it would go in any sequel, though. Cruise II?

the best online story in a very long time.

kind of like islands. long well done very good plot and rap up was open.

this could go on. :)

thanks

The storyline was very interesting and the characters were very real to life.

A very enjoyable story.

Thanks for the read

Excellent story and well done. Thank you ! Keep writing ! I can't wait for your next submission.

I personally don't like ANYONE interfering with a bro/sis relationship. Kinda why I read stories in this category instead of romance. Gave it a 3 because of the obvious effort the author put into the story, otherwise I would have rated it lower. Still, it's obvious a lot of people loved this story, so maybe it's just me.

I loved the story line and theme. The author did a very good job keeping my attention. I've always said details make a story stand out and this story certainly makes that statement true.

The only critique I have is, when a speaker asks a question, the speaker "asks or asked" - not "said" - as in the example below. I noticed the author used "said" almost all the way through the story. However, it wasn't enough of a distraction to lower the rating. I gave the story a 5 star rating,

"What's the matter, don't you want to leave Meg?" Jenny said

Thanks for sharing this wonderful story!

RecHiker

I do wish they had done some experimentation with anal sex, bi-sex between the guys (mutual oral sex and mutual hand jobs), and sexual play with the parents.

I'm not usually into incest stories or nudity stories but this one was amazing. I started reading when it was first posted, was disappointment when it cut off mid sentence and kept checking back every day to see if it was back. I don't have much time for reading but I spent my few spare moments during the past few days reading and coming back to read some more. Dunno why this one just kept my attention but its obviously done very well. Congrats to the author (I don't usually comment on stories either)

over use of the word giggle. It made them sound like 13 year old instead of 18 and 19.

Unbelievable that an 18 year old woman that was a virgin could go from being a prude that refused to look at nudist to becoming one, claim to love her brother in more then a sisterly way and started having sex with him to 3 days later start fucking a guy she just met and his sister and not be phased by finding her mother blowing another man. Funny part was when she was whimpering to Brad that he must think of her as a slut and he said no. Only reason he could have said no was because he wanted to pound her pussy again. I was surprised that Meg and or Jenny didn't end up fucking their dads in either a 3 or 4 way and the same with Glen and Brad and their mothers. Other then that it was a fair story, but totally unbelievable

What a great story kept me up just about all night couldn't walk away....loved it

Great story but way over-use of "giggled" even if you're a 14 year old girl.

If the kids would have had sex with the parents that would have been the icing on the cake. That's OK, I filled that part in for myself. lol

I like this story and very exciting. This could still continue with 1 or 2 more chapters.

Great Job. Please continue writing.

I loved this story. I think you need to expand on the use of different types of alcohol to lighten the mood and surprise your readers every once in a while. Besides rum and coke you used a mai tai and thay wasnt even spelled right. Other than that I think that you should definitely continue this story.

Warm, romantic, sexy,full of fun. Beautiful natural, realistic language showing young teenage love with exciting sensual sexy scenes. Wonderful!!!

ever thought about making a movie out of it ? you could make two movies out of it. one a R rated and the other a X rated one. i would watch the X rated one . I thought it was a good story. i think you could even add on to it up until they got past the next cruse. married still in the lifestyle.

I liked this. It was fun sexy and different. I would have preferred if the siblings ended up together though. But that is just me.

you have had a year to continue with this story. what's the hold up? excellent story

Wow that was a long one,but enjoyed every minute of it . Have to say though i kept waiting for the parents to join in and i would love to see a movie like that.

Just briliant!

I'm sorry I didn't find this story sooner, it's great!

Thank you for sharing. * * * * *

RecHiker

Good job. One of the best stories I've read.

A good story has to have a number of elements - a good story line, descriptive narrative, enjoyable content, sufficient character to not become boring & plot twists. This story had it all in spades. I normally stop at 4* unless a story is exceptional as this one is. Well deserved 5*

Had my attention the entire time. LOVED it. Somewhat predictable though. None theless, great story and great ending.Thanks,

I loved the way this story was written, the author knows how to write indeed. I enjoyed reading every sentence, specially that usually I don't read long stories...

However, here are my constructive criticism:

- The story was tooooo long in it's category.

- Too many repetitions of scenarios, sometimes I thought I was reading the same pages again, but I wasn't. i.e.: the story repeats itself on many pages.

- The word giggle was used extensively and kind-of lost it's meaning

- To make it more enticing, it would've helped if the parents were also involved with their children, at least at the end. Or at least there should've been some description of the parent's activities in the foursome situation. We only had a hint :(

Overall I enjoyed reading the whole story, it had meaning and makes people understand the swinging concept better as well as incest.

Thank you. *****

Horrible

No mom son incest

Long read, but very well written. Took several days to read the entire story. I loved it. Keep writing.

It was a long story but well worth it. Would recommend it good read.

Disagree with commenters who wished for sexcapades with the parents, or for anal.

Preferable AS IS.

So much of it was sex scenes, that well into the story I began to skip/scan through them until the plot or storyline picked back up. Same with details about eating.

Epic story.

5 stars.

Paul in Oklahoma

1. This is a fantasy site and there is no requirement that plots be realistic or plausible. It's acceptable to have plots that are far fetched but a story is more exciting when it is mostly realistic. The "surprise! It's a nude cruise!" element did not work for me. And, frankly, if you tell an 18 year old boy he can go on a nude cruise, he doesn't need to get nude himself, but he can still walk around and look at naked women . . . he's going to agree to do that every time unless he is a religious fundamentalist.

2. Everyone goes from being in love with their sibling to being in love with the other guy/girl literally overnight. That was a colossal fail for me!

3. I realize that it is a long story and editing your own work is difficult, but there were several typos throughout that were distracting. They were the kind of typos that spell-check does not catch, such as "there" instead of "their." Hopefully, if you are still writing, you are using an editor to review your work.

4. Despite these criticisms, I thought that it was a very good story. Comparing it to other stories on this site, it is definitely a five-star effort!

Really great story, I read most of it through in one sitting. I kept flashing back to a 10 day cruise I went on long ago. I love that kind of story. I'm stunned with happiness that you never had them doing any anal to each other, I find anal a complete turnoff.

A bit long.

Enjoyed the writing, the development of the characters. Sex scenes were well done. Gave it 5 stars. If you ever plan on a sequel, a group sex version with the parents on the next cruise would be interesting, maybe involving the newly married children.

Crazy how I found everything I like short and everything I don't long am I the only human who like exclusive ralationship?

very compelling story! I was hinged on every word

Excellent story, love happy endings. Maybe more chapters?

Tiku21, I agree with you. Exclusivity is my thought as well. I enjoyed the story until the other couple joined in. It just took so much away that was building and changed to orgy story in my mind. That's not what I was reading until it was. That's when I stopped reading it.

Their parents were very deceptive and rude :/ They should have informed them before the trip on what kind of trip it was.

I really enjoyed reading this. I couldn’t relate to the MC that much as I have no idea what goes on in the mind of a woman, but I liked it for what it was.