All Comments on 'Ten Miles Beyond the Asphalt'

That is undoubtably the best story i have read on here for a long, long, time. well deserving of the 5.0 rating. Is there a part 2? Please?

I love the chemistry between the characters. I hope there's a sequel to this.

stories I've read on this site recently. I've been reading stories on this site for over a decade now, and most of them get a three or maybe a four star rating. A very few get five from me, but this definitely gets a five. Please, let there be a sequel, because you didn't address what Megan's problem was at school.

You have a marvelous talent to engage and hold a reader.

Great story telling. Liked so much about this, the characters, the plot twists, the language and style of the story, excellent, all of it. Please do more of this.

Please tell me you will write another chapter.

One of the best! I hope the saga continues!

I loved this story but felt cheated that you ended it so abruptly without continuing it until the next morning with the aunt. Please let there be a followup chapter and soon!

Holy crap, that was hot!

I loved the sibling's love story and normally don't like more people getting involved but you did it so persuasively. And hot. The aunt's reaction was so human and believable. Nicely done.

It feels like a second chapter is coming.. their story isn't finished!

Thanks.

I am seldom surprised by turns of events in this story, but this one knocked my socks off. Great job. There is enough material in this to give this a long run. I really hope you do! Is the mom next? Just keep Jason out of it.

I can't wait for the next installment.

I really like the build up. There's character development, and not just quick mindless sex. The sex was/is good, mind you but I really like to know the people. To see the love between them. Thanks!

Good taboo stories aren't the norm. Most authors usually write what I like to call "stroke fiction"...and it's usually three pages long. That is why most Taboo stories aren't all that realistic, nor satisfyingly good. This story, has been an exception to that rule... being longer than three pages, (Character development is EVERYthing people!!) and having the space, within the story, to have believable non-sexual interaction, between characters. This story covers character development nicely..and in a natural, rather than forced way. Paragraphs are well written, and detailed depictions of the countryside, the weather conditions, and the cabin, all set the scene for the reader. This is the mark of good fiction... feeding your mind, with the information it needs, to draw a good mental picture. When writing fiction... ANY fiction, this is absolutely essential. When writing erotica, it's even MORE important, in order to get credibility, from what can seem, at times, an unrealistic story line. So, with the appropriate details filled in, we can then begin the erotic portion of the story... which should feel more like a subplot, than the center stage. This isn't stroke fiction by any stretch of imagination... it's a HUMAN story... with an emotionally erotic twist. I haven't read an erotic story this good, since Nick Scipio began writing the "Summer Camp" stories, many years back. I sincerely hope that MSTarot keeps writing... I was unaware of this author, until reading this particular story. From there, I checked out the author's other stories... which are also well written. I would admonish the author, to proofread, utilizing a competent spellcheck word processing program... but other than that? Composition of the story, is very well done. Grammatical structure is as good as anything I've ever seen, fiction-wise. Plot creativity and credibility are seamlessly well done. Take a bow, MSTarot... you're onto a real winner here. This is a possible golden clitorides winner.

I was surprised with this story. Is really hot, and the turns of the events are amazing. The reaction of the aunt Elena (at first time) is the normal reaction to the incest, but later, when she agree the relation and ads herself to them, was incredible.

Please, don`t kill anybody (father, or others family members) in the sequels.

Waiting a next chapter coming soon!

5* for you!

Great Job.

I apologize for my English, is not my native language, but day a day, I`m learning to better write. I hope is no many grammatical errors in my comments!

Could have been even better with the help of a skilled editor.Before I get into that though, I must say this was one of the most thoroughly enjoyable sibcest stories I have read here in a long long time. I love these kinds of stories that are about Family, Relationships, with 3 dimensional characters and real plots.I also appreciate the wry humor, irony, and intelligent yet engaging dialogue.Throughought the story, the author's effective use of descriptive imagery with attention to details kept me reading.

I also am so grateful for the absence of unrealistic characters with perfect lives, gargantuan 10+ inch cocks, etc.

Now back to the comment about a good Editor: MSTarot I have read enough of your work to recognize you have a real talent for storytelling. Your writing is good enough that perhaps you think your work won't benefit from independent peer review and editing prior to submission. I have read some 6 your comments to feedback on prior stories that suggests you may still have a somewhat cavalier attitude towards spelling and grammar. It matters!

Examples:

A large stone is a boulder (n.) not a "bolder" [sic] (adj.).

The phrase is "pride and joy", not "pride enjoy" [sic].

There were more than a few other such errors throughout the story.

Use an Editor! If you are using an editor, get a better one. Spell check won't catch these types of mistakes!

Please keep writing!

You would have got 5 stars from me if you had edited it better. There were many instances of you using the wrong word somewhere. You let spell check autocorrect without checking for context. Get an editor for your next story. I would be happy to read it for you before you publish the next chapter.

What a good story.... made me aroused most of the reading time !

Kept me surprised from the beginng to the ent.

...but weak at the end.

I'm always been amused by critical comments from readers - particularly those who have established accounts and haven't produced anything - calling out a writer for grammatical and/or spelling mistakes. Obviously this writer knows better but like most writers didn't catch the mistakes on the second or even third time through. That happens to everyone. The focus of comments should be directed at the construction and pace of the story - and its proximity to reality. The nits and gnats of spelling and grammar - while important - are not ultimately the test of whether this is a good story or not. This is a good story and those who can do better, should jump in and show everyone what you got!

Damn good story. Hope you can continue it

Really enjoyed the story. A few issues with wrong words spoilt it a little for me - possibly from auto correction??? (annoys the hell out me as well but is of more use than not - just). Please don't let this put you off. Would love to hear how the story progresses after this...

This story has quite a significant set of circumstances, it's so damn interesting and covers many subjects on relationships, intimacy, and plain raw sex. Very enjoyable -- and now their Aunt has witnessed brother and sister having raw sex and becomes aware of a relationship beyond brother-sister. Their aunt has joined in and wants to now be a direct participant. It's obvious, Megan is not going to be told what to do or how her life will be and her brother wants the same thing and they have now begun to bond sexually etc. It will be so hot to see just how much their Aunt does sexually and hopefully, she'll play often and guide them in how to develop a hidden relationship from their parents and the rest of the family. So damn HOT; cannot wait for another few chapters. Thank you !!

I was absolutely loving this story until you decided to involve the Aunt. That was such a huge disappointment for what was becoming a great love story between the siblings. You are a talented writer. I still gave 5 stars for your writing and storytelling ability. My opinion of the direction you are taking shouldn't affect my scoring.

This is a great story; congratulations! And the involvement of the Aunt was key at least for me. They had to get caught, and they were; but I did not foresee the perhaps slightly too quick complete change in the Aunt. But who cares? People are strange, and the point is it was really hot. I love the Megan character.

This was nice, I love a story that isn't just fuck, blow, end. I know that we are supposed to masturbate to stories here, but a story where we can sort of bond with characters because they were developed makes the story more hot and steamy. I must admit I do hope that you create a 2nd installment that closes out what you left open here. After getting to know your characters I'm now drawn to see how things turn our for them, hopefully all ends well since fantasy can be everything real life isn't, but alas that's up to you we're just along for the ride.

And I fervently hope that more

chapters will be forthcoming.

The sibling characters were

fairly realistic and endearing

and I'm curious to see where

the author is going to go

with this.

I loved this story I loved following the story until it gets to were you hope it goes.

I would love to see what happens in the morning !

This is one of the best stories of its kind I've read, and it has some good writing in it. Thank you for sharing it with us.

...until page 7 or so, where you decided to get the aunt involved sexually. Then it quickly became a 4* read. Whereas I do not deny the hot sex scenes, yet it's just sad to see the blossoming romance between the siblings turn into family fuck fest so quickly. & they themselves had sex what, two times? & it has already became a threesome with the aunt. How much time before it becomes an all out family orgy? A week or two?

Now don't get me wrong MSTarot. I respect your literary talent. Also you have the COMPLETE right & control over your characters & stories to shape them whichever way you like. I'm just annoyed of seeing thich same trend over & over again in almost 80% of the 'to be siblings romance stories' (not the quick "I saw your gigantic cock & can't help myself" wham- bam- thank you ma'am type of stories, but the stories having the actual potential of becoming much more than a jerk off story). They start out as great love stories with great details, even capable of appearing in the romance section despite the taboo aspect. But then after 3/4th completion of the story the author decides to involve another family member (or two or sometimes the whole damn family!). If not family member/s, then why not the sister's BFF. Or better yet, find another sibling couple & have them swap partners. From there it quickly turns from a LOVE story to a LUST story. It's like the love (& the sex) between the brother & the sister is just not enough. I'm so mad at those times I can kill something. With all due respect to the respective authors, it's just sad (& quite irritating, I might add) that a love story showing such great potentials for 5 to 10 pages (& even worse, for many chapters) quickly turns into stale fuck story. Anyway keep up the good work & if you can, write a pure & simple "love" story between a brother & a sister sometimes. I'm certain if you do so, it won't be any less than a masterpiece! Thank you :)

~MD

N.B.- For those assholes who, after reading my comment, want to tell me, "Dude, it's just a sex story (i.e. erotica) site; not a literature site. So jack off & get over it already.": Well first of all, you may have a very little blood supply left to your bigger head, but I have enough to see the "Lit" part before the "erotica". So FYI, stories here are expected to be not just "erotica", but "literary erotica".

Secondly (& most importantly), I'm an independent citizen of an independent country expressing my opinion. So FUCK OFF!

Five stars for this hope to see the next chapter very soon.

This a probably be best adult story I have ever read. He attention to start put you right in the story I can Wally relate. Ver hot!!

Loved it!

This is a fabulous story so far please keep going

Can't wait to see more of this story.

Dog is cool too.

so much unneeded info stopped at page 3 i love long stories but seriously this sucked

Great, so far...

One of the best I've read this year great character development. I hope Megan and her brother keep their love intact and not just turn into a family orgy though. I hope to see more of this story !!!

This is one of the most epic stories I have ever read. Love it

Pass....

I felt like I was there. Some stories rattle on with mechanics but this one has so much body and feelings.

but there were so many missing or wrong words, spelling errors, and shifts in speaking voices that it was difficult to read. There were a couple of places I could not figure out what was meant even after re-reading several times.

None of them were fatal to the romance and could be remedied with a little attention to detail. Perhaps an additional set of eyes would help.

But, as I said, I really liked the actual storyline. Character development was fun to watch. I hope we will be able to follow these two as they figure out how they are going to make it work.

The story is great but I look forward to more. Maybe while fucking his sister the condom breaks getting her pregnant and their mother catches them and joins in.

Nice story line, earned a 4

Found it to hard to read, I usually admire the odd quip or one liner and I can appreciate that you've got more than one or two good ones going on in there but for me, at this time of night there’s to many, its like chewing my way through something that’s more tough than flavoursome... gave up on Pg 3 but it still earned triple twinkles.

Wheres the rest

I think that all of your readers would like the following of this story. But there wore much of the script that i personaly skipet because it was not interesting on the development of the story. You could write something with more action and less interaction

I'm always amazed at the quality of some of the content I read on Literotica. This story displays that quality extremely well. I noticed some of the other comments were complaining about the amount of build up, and that they simply wanted more action, but I say if you continue to write erotica, ignore their horny asses and continue writing it as you are. There's enough stuff on here that's all sex, no story, so it's nice to get some fresh air that has a solid amount of both.

Well done! You've lit the fire, now keep it burning! Ignore the comments about less story and character development and more action. The plot and character development is what makes a 5 star story. If they want less of that, they can watch a boring compilation porno with all the story taken out.

I appreciated your writing style, and despite the typos I found it easy to read and flowing well. My only critique was that you seemed to give up on any pretext of plot as soon as things started to get spicy. I understand the tender moment after leaving the hospital, but there's no real explanation for the 0 to 100 switch from either of them aside from lust. And to me, the aunt makes no sense. Why would she go from angry and furious to accepting so quickly. Even if she was enraptured by their two young bodies, promising to fuck the brother after 1 night seems rushed, and even more confusing that the sister would go along with it and be willing to share after seeming so possesive just a page before.

And I have read THOUSANDS of them.

Lots of beautiful "plays" on words and descriptive phrases that are worthy of a top author. (Feeding the mutt . . . and the end product . . . . Talk about laugh, Trev)

I gave it ***** FIVE stars because four wouldn't be enough.

Out of ten . . . I'd score it a nine.

I really hope that you will follow this story up with a sequel. Please!

bring the part 2 already!!

Excellent work, thank you.

You had me intrigued how this story would end with everyone being happy. It was a great story but the end was a fizzer I reckon but I am sorry I can't think of a better ending.

I am a huge lover of M.S. Tarot stories. This plot was great, the sequence was wobderful. It flowed well. Everything was excellent....but....

...hehe! You knew a but was coming didn't you? I really despise Megan. Not a sympathetic character. Maybe if she had gone into therapy she would have gotten her head on straight when she was 12? Any child forced to do those beauty parents would need therapy! Lol. Glad this story is fiction.

You did good sir! Great story with a wonderful villain. Megan was perfect as the antagonist.

I would have loved it, if the condom had torn while he was screwing Megan that last time. I hope his aunt gets bred when he nails her over and over.

Story's good. But I personally am withholding a star due to the fact that your attempts at injecting humor fall flat almost 100% of the time.

the next morning?

lost a star with the threesome. turned a love story into just another fuck story...

It was a great story and I was enjoying it, until the 3some with the aunt. If there will be a Part 2, I hope it doesn't include the aunt or any other extended family member.

What's here is good, and I like it a lot. Unfortunately, the only thing that's been resolved is the immediate crisis. Everything introduced prior to Aunt Elena's arrival at the cabin -- which is most of the story -- is still up in the air. It's a good place for a chapter to end, but the issues of the father's health, Megan's academic career, and the status of their relationship haven't reached any natural stopping point. Please return to this!

Good story beginning. You need at least one more chapter. The thing you need the most is an editor. Spelling and grammar count. It will make your presentation much better.

Even if it was an incest story it was more romance than anything else. Until the last page at least. Including the aunt totally ruined the previous 7 pages of building romance. Also, where’s the resolution of the story? Nothing about the father and mother’s arguments and how do they move forward together?

I’m not sure the last bit with the aunt ruined the story but it didn’t help it any. I know. I know. It’s a story. And most of the this author has been spot on with all these stories. This one just feels off,

Talk about a need for part 2!

I just skipped to the comments from page three to tell you that I LOVE YOU for putting "nother" ("and a good nother thirty minutes beyond that")!!!!!!!

Had potential but you blew the landing. Not really impressed.

I woudh have liked to read the :rest of the story". WTF...CINCO ESTRELLAS!

I really enjoyed this story until the end…again. You have a slow build love story between the siblings, they admit their love and consummate it, and then the first thing you have them do is jump in bed with the aunt? I know this is supposed to be fantasy, erotica, but so many of these stories are ruined by authors trying to do too much with it at the end. They declare their love, have a vicious fight to defend it, and then fuck the aunt ?! Not love. And it doesn’t even remotely make sense. I agree with the one review…good approach, but you didn’t stick the landing.

I love your stories but PLEASE find an editor....

Great stories, premise and ideas but I spend half my reading time trying to figure out what word you forgot or why you added the wrong word...

"I love the bother of you"..?

Amazing!

Also, I understand why you added the Aunt! With her getting involved she wouldn't spill the beans, so to speak. Thanks for writing.

so many good ways this story could have explored. instead it turns into just sex. nothing important but an author that loves to write words. example being a whole paragraph describing an elevator, REALLY?

On the first page the main character rolls his eyes an laughs when he finds put that his father was in an accident and is going to surgery. Err... I've read enough.

This is undoubtedly one of the best stories I’ve read on literotica. Your story building, unforeseen twists and turns. Not just sex, but also romance and tenderness. Good job.

I am a copy editor and some typical mistakes with some writers stand out but you did a really good job.

Great story.

I would like a somewhat "happy ending" stopping point like the father fully recovered.

I really enjoyed reading your story, until I reached the end. Now I'm left somehow disappointed.

It starts with reasonably well developed characters and a plausible plot, but quickly gets lost in the rapid succession of drama and sexual interaction. Apart from the abrupt ending and the rather casual resolution of the individual dramas, I find it unfortunate that Megan's character in particular is not told to the end in relation to her dropping out of school. An option not taken to give her character much more depth.

The involvement of the aunt first as part of the drama and then as a sexual partner is overkill in my eyes and wouldn't have been necessary.