The Circle Ch. 37

Chapter 37 -- Tammy the voyeur. More photos by Matt

After the meeting broke up, Tammy went up to Bob. "Thank you for including me in your meeting and vote. I'm not really a family member, but I appreciate the gesture."

"Tammy! You have become as much family as any of us. Of course, you get a vote. Plus, you are here most of the time with the kids; you'll be a star of the show along with the babies."

Tammy blushed, "Oh, dear, I hadn't thought about that side of things."

Bob hugged the slightly older woman. "You'll do fine. Just forget that the cameras are around."

Tammy paused, and commented, "I'm sorry I walked in on the four of you the other night." Before Bob could respond, she added, "It looked like ... fun."

Bob smiled, "It was. I really do love Renee and Ellen."

Tammy whispered, "I could tell. I watched you for a while before I said goodnight."

Bob chuckled, "Next time, come and join us."

Tammy's color shot up from normal skin tone to rose red in five seconds. "Oh, dear." She turned and scurried away. Tammy wanted to join in; that was her problem. She felt such moralistic pressure to remain a chaste widow that she still couldn't see any alternative to her single and sexless life.

Two weeks later, a Prep Crew arrived at the house. Ellen coordinated their visit. Their work was to see how the house was arranged, plan various camera angles, and to work on the lighting in the darker corners of the house so that things would show up well for the actually filming.

Some of the common rooms got rearranged. Light bulbs got swapped for higher luminosity bulbs. Several modern lamps got added, including some bounce lighting for some of the walls. Artwork was rearranged. Outside, some lighting got added near the pool and hot tub.

The crew carefully checked out each bedroom too, and then each of the nursery rooms, making minor adjustments here and there, and taking copious notes. One photographer in the group took some casual portraits of each person and each baby in the group; these were for PR purposes and to line up the 'cast' of The Circle.

The NBC prep crew explained that the tentative title for the series was going to beThe Circle. They also felt that some of their eyeball-to-eyeball competition was the re-runs ofSister Wives on one of the cable channels.

The network announced the TV series with a whole lot of ballyhoo about how racy it would be, how interesting, and such. The trailers made it seem like a combination of fraternity and sorority parties, along with various dramas surrounding the children.

A month after that, the first film crews arrived. There were going to be two shifts a day on each two-man crew, at least for starters; one in the a.m. to mid-afternoon; and the other from there to about midnight or earlier depending on bedtimes or when things got quiet in the house. Everyone in the house was fitted with a wireless microphone, and asked to wear it when in the common areas. At least they had on-off switches, but the pick-up antennas were all over the house, so if someone forgot to turn off their mic, whatever they said was recorded somewhere. One member of each film crew ran the sound mixing and recording equipment.

The first week of filming was probably a throw away. Everyone was so aware of the cameras that every interaction became like a stilted and poorly acted screenplay. "Good. Morning. Steve." "Oh. Good. Morning. Marlene. How. Are. You. Today." "I. Am. Fine. And. You?" "Just. Fine." Ughh. Watching some playback from the cameras after a couple of days made everyone groan because of how bad it was. Further, all the foreplay and romance in the group had totally vanished, except for what went on behind closed doors. There were no kisses hello or goodbye. No hugs. No handshakes and back slaps. Just mechanical humanoid robots walking through the day.

Brian Knight, an NBC producer, showed up on Sunday evening. He met with us informally, and urged us to get over the hurdle of the cameras being present and to please go back to acting as we usually did. His pep talk seemed to help, and everyone got more relaxed. He was a good coach.

After that, some of the drama started to reappear in our daily lives; the kind of drama that The Circle loved about each other.

Lolly came home from work on Wednesday, and after kissing everyone hello, stood in the kitchen and said in a loud voice, "I have an announcement everyone."

All attention shifted to the petite woman.

Lolly grinned, "I'm pregnant." She put her hands in the air and did a little happy dance in circles. Several of the men and women standing around went to her with hugs and kisses.

Tina brought in Charlyn and put the six-month old baby in Lolly's arms with a grin. "Ta dah! Now you can practice."

Lolly laughed and held the squirrely baby in her arms and tickled the youngster. Charlyn gave out big belly laughs. Lolly looked ecstatic. The baby looked at Lolly and kept yelling 'Ma ma,' 'Ma ma.'

Derek asked, "If you haven't picked a baby daddy yet, I volunteer."

Kyle, Kurt, Mike, and Don quickly added their names to the list.

Lolly teased, "I'll pick the man who loves me the most between now and when I deliver. Who'll hold my head while I have morning sickness; who'll love me when I'm as big as a blimp; and who'll bring me pickles and chocolate ice cream at two in the morning."

Lolly looked to each man, "Well, no one's dropping out. This will present a dilemma. Let me think about this. Seriously, maybe I'll do a drawing or lottery or something. I love all of you so much -- and you're all possible daddies."

Renee tossed in, "You could always have another female in the 'spouse' box on the birth certificate. That's being done these days."

That comment provoked an interesting discussion about the precise definition of 'paternity', the true meaning of fatherhood, and which female members of The Circle were the most masculine.

Tammy asked Lolly, "Are you going to go back to work right away?"

Another long discussion about when babies and children needed their parents most took place. To everyone's surprise, Tammy even spoke up with some opinions.

As the discussion went on, Mike captured Lolly and pulled the petite girl onto his lap. He started to shower her with kisses, and whispered little love words in her ear. She smiled and relished the attention. He slipped a hand under her t-shirt and started to fondle her boobs in front of the others, but no one seemed to care.

Mike already had a teenage daughter from his first marriage. We had laughed at how that poor girl would have to admit to her high school classmates that this was her father on the reality TV show.

As Chef Neil served dinner, Don made it a point to sit next to Lolly. He romanced her by nuzzling into her neck and ear, favorite 'hot spots' that turned her on. Lolly was in seventh heaven with the attention.

Jim started to tease Don about wanting to raise two generations of kids. He retorted that Monica's generation had that duty; he just wanted to remain on Lolly's good side because he loved her. The film crew captured the kisses between them, proving that he was indeed on her good side.

Down the long table, Michelle was filmed cuddling into Steve, a point sure to raise the ire of many viewers at seeing the married couple making ga-ga eyes at others. Steve was being attentive as usual, even running his fingers up under Michelle's skirt to tease her further. The sexual innuendo was thick.

Willow arrived home on the late side of dinner, as usual, having completed her duties at the TV station. Everyone welcomed her, and she took a place of honor between Bob and Matt, who both kissed her with more than enough passion to amuse the rest of the table -- and the film crew. Tammy was holding Ariana, Willow's toddler, who kept screaming 'Ma ma' in a voice that could probably be heard a mile away.

After dinner, the cameras followed Renee and Ellen as they went over Renee's schedule for the rest of the week, and then shifted to Bill, Steve, Kurt, and Mike as they went over house plans for a home they'd just started to frame.

Later, several of the film crew commented about how 'rich' the interactions of the group were for prime time viewing.

* * * * *

The film crews captured hours and hours of material, sending it all back to Los Angeles for viewing and editing, usually with comments about the content and key portions of the interactions. The crews had shifted to using two, and sometimes three cameras simultaneously because of the diversity of the conversations and content going on within The Circle.

Matt ended up capturing much of the footage one week. He had submitted some of his photographic artwork to a juried competition in the city, and had ultimately won first place. His submissions were tasteful nudes of most of the various women in The Circle. He was to have a dedicated show where he could sell his work at a major gallery for two months starting in a month.

He announced this at dinner one night, and got a round of applause from his colleagues. Renee and Ellen puffed out their lower lips. Renee said, "Hey, you don't have Ellen or me in your portfolio. We want to have you add us to your collection. We're feeling left out."

Ellen enthusiastically nodded.

After dinner the next day, several of the women attended to the makeup for Renee and Ellen, while Matt and Nathan created a boudoir 'set' in Matt's bedroom. Camera crews captured both sets of activity.

Renee and Ellen showed up initially in very sexy bustieres with see-through little thongs on their lower parts -- Renee in white, and Ellen in pink. They looked amazingly alluring. Matt took a couple of hundred shots of each one, and then more with the two of them posing together and looking very bisexual. Renee helped a lot with the posing based on her experience with modeling.

After that, the girls lost their clothing, and a similar set of nude shots was made. When Matt declared the photo shoot over, both Ellen and Renee came to Matt and Nathan, and asked to sleep with them -- together -- right then. Matt shoed everyone out of his room, and shut the door. The quartet didn't reappear for two hours.

Somehow the film crews were able to capture some of the photo shoot with footage they were sure would pass through the stations censors.

The next couple of evenings and over the weekend, Matt carefully edited through the hundreds of photos he'd taken of Renee and Ellen, ending with six erotic photographs that included some of each, and then the two women together. He added these to what would be shown in the gallery.

When the gallery with his photographs opened, everyone in The Circle showed up to celebrate, including a film crew. Willow had also brought a crew from her TV station to capture and publicize the event.

By the end of the evening, Matt had sold every 'first edition' photograph -- a first in annals of the gallery. The works remained on display for the next two months, and the gallery had record attendance during that time, and hundreds of smaller signed and framed photographs were also sold. Matt's hobby had turned into a lucrative vocation.

A national photographic magazine heard about Matt's show and award, and they showed up one day after calling to interview him, and to put some samples of his work in one of their issues. All this went further into making Matt a highly sought after erotic photographer.

In anticipation of the reality show revealing some of his work, Matt hired Alice to put up a really sharp-looking and professional website for him, where he could sell additional copies of his work, including many pieces that had not been displayed in the gallery show.

Tammy had been at the gallery grand opening, helping to squire the toddlers around the large open space filled with people, and to relieve mothers of their babies periodically. She'd been keenly aware of the photo shoot with Renee and Ellen, but had no idea of Matt's other work or the models.

In Tammy's mind, she wondered what she would look like if Matt were to photograph her. Would there be any appeal of her body to anyone? Would people turn away?

Tammy stood looking at a shot of a beautifully pregnant and nude woman, her body glistening with oil as her hands tastefully and lovingly surrounded the baby bulge. The picture was Monica, and the look in her eyes conveyed love for not only baby, but for all who came in contact with her.

Monica came up to Tammy, "Do you like it? It was only six weeks before I delivered Alyson. I think Matt did such a nice job."

Tammy nodded, "You are truly beautiful in every way, both in the picture and in person." She leaned over and kissed Monica on the lips. She whispered, "I love you and I love Alyson."

Monica was surprised, but did respond to Tammy's kiss. As they parted, Monica said in her caring tone, "I love you as well. Thank you." Monica pulled Tammy to another photograph around a corner. She pointed, "This one is a little more erotic. What do you think?"

The photograph showed another pregnant nude woman, Tina, and slightly behind her in dark shadows, but almost to the point of total seclusion, was a handsome nude male. The man's arms wrapped around Tina from the rear: one hand partially supporting the baby bump, and the other holding a breast but in a way that still allowed the viewer to see her darkening areola and nipple; the other breast was clearly showing. The man was leaning in and kissing the woman's shoulder as she obviously relished the physical contact. The viewer could almost see the man's cock against Tina's ass. The love and lust in the photograph were spectacularly captured.

Tammy smiled, "That's Tina and Jim. They're beautiful, and you're right, the picture is erotic to a fault."

Monica volunteered, "They made love after that picture was taken, with Tina on top. The two of them were so horny posing for Matt, they could barely stand it."

"How did you know that? Did Matt tell you?"

Monica chortled, "No, I was there helping Matt with lighting. After Jim and Tina got into their fuck, Matt and I also had a hot fuck. It was so worth remembering because Matt took some pictures of Jim and Tina while I was blowing him. The men were harder than rock. He also has pictures of afterwards, with Tina and I kissing as their cum ran down our legs."

Tammy whispered to herself, "That's so hot. I ... I ... I need a man."

Monica kissed her and said, "Tammy, there are thirteen men in The Circle. They all love you and want you."

Tammy looked embarrassed. "With all the beauty in The Circle, I can't imagine why anyone would want a middle-age widow whose only skill is that she loves children and can care for them."

Monica hugged the older woman to her, "Oh, you are so wrong ... so, so, wrong. We all love you."

Tammy looked uncertain.

Monica reached down and swept up Marshall into her arms, kissing Sheila's toddler. "Tammy, come with me over to that corner where there aren't so many people." She looked and saw that the baby seat with Alyson asleep in it was being guarded by Sheila and Jim.

Tammy followed and looked up at the photograph Matt had taken as the two stopped. The photo was a close-up of a woman's mons with a man's hand twirling a finger through the small tuft of pubic hair.

Tammy commented in a neutral tone, "Now, I can't tell who's in that picture."

Monica smiled, "That's Ellie and Alex. They were about to make love."

Tammy muttered but smiled, "Too much information."

Monica said, "Tammy, we all love you and we all want to make love to you -- and I mean that in a carnal way, and in a way reflecting our mind, body, and spiritual connection with you."

Tammy looked shocked.

Monica continued, "I guess I'll have this talk with you because no one wants to cross the boundary that you've established about physical contact. What we do see and hear from you repeatedly, almost on a daily basis, is that you see us andalmost want to participate. You are being a voyeur to this important part of life, without allowing yourself to fully participate."

Monica took a deep breath, "I'm not saying you have to change at all, but I am reminding you that you have taken the position as a spectator instead of engaging in life. I don't mean just the sex. You looked longingly at Kyle taking flying lessons; you could do that. You've watched Neil prepare meal after meal for us with great interest in his recipes and technique, but you don't cook. You appeared more than casually interested in being a photographer, but you don't act on your interest. You found Alice's work on the various websites she builds fascinating and watched her work for hours, yet you don't lift a finger to take that interest to the next level of actually 'doing' something. We know you have some computer skills, so it's clearly not that you're a technophobe"

"Tammy, I know you've been a widow for four years. Losing someone dear to you is tough, and I would be shattered were I your shoes when it happened, BUT it's time to move on and start living again. You chide yourself for not having any skills beyond childcare; well, those are important skills that most of us don't have as well as you do. That said, go and develop some new skills in addition to what you have. Engage with life. Stop hiding behind the babies. Learn to fly. Race cars. Skydive. Scuba dive. Become a master chef. Make a computer sing. It's all at your fingertips -- just do something.

"Everyone in our circle loves you, and we will support you in every way we can to help you grow and evolve, and develop in whatever direction you choose. Just know that there is a loving support network right there for you. If it's money, we'll pay for it. If it's time, we'll make sure you have it. If it's the need of a mentor, we'll provide that. Just do it."

Tammy hadn't had anybody be so confrontational with her since her husband died. Mark had often chided her to 'get out of her own way,' he'd called it. Monica had told her the same thing in so many words.

She admitted to herself as a tear ran down her cheek, Monica was right. She did hide behind the babies. As her own kids had been before they left home for college, they were a convenient excuse to not engage any further with life. The last time she had, the one great love of her life had suddenly died at the hands of a drunk driver, leaving her a shattered woman. She didn't have to be shattered any longer.

Tammy started to cry, and Monica pulled the woman to her, holding her and the toddler. Marshall looked at Tammy with surprise that she was crying; he stayed mute, apparently knowing this was an important time for the two women.

Two strong male arms surrounded Tammy and pulled her to his chest. Alex kissed Tammy's forehead and temples. He whispered, "I love you, Tammy. I promise to help you. We all do."

* * * * *

Lynn came downstairs holding Charlyn in her arms. Tina followed, kissed her baby and rushed out the door to her car. Derek followed the pair, also kissed the baby and ran off.

Tammy looked up from playing on the floor with Ariana, Teddy, and Marshall, the older of the tots. She asked, "Why the rush?"

Lynn smiled, "Tina has a one-hour massage at the spa in thirty minutes, and then a test in her Anatomy II class. She's really into getting that physical therapy certification. Derek is just late for work; the baby slept in and so he made love to the two of us, so now we're all late."

Tammy nodded. She looked at Lynn, and there was no doubt on her face that she wanted to ask her several dozen personal questions.

Lynn, being insightful, said, "Tammy, you can ask me anything. I have no secrets."

Tammy was jarred from the confrontational response. "Oh. How'd you know? It's just ... well ... you make love with all the men in The Circle, don't you?"