The Divorce Attorney

Mandy was clearly on a mission, so I left her to it and did the dishes. By the time she returned she found me sprawled across the couch watching the late-night football game.

MJ looked and said, "Bedroom, now."

She was already pulling clothes off on the way, while I was left with the dilemma of figuring out if I should turn the TV off or not. By the time her bra had hit the floor and she still had three paces left before she got to the bedroom door, my mind was made up for me.

She was the aggressor that evening, all one-hundred and twenty-five pounds of this woman took charge in our bedroom and wouldn't let up until both of us could do nothing but hold each other's sticky, sweat-soaked and panting bodies. The shock that evening was when she let out a sigh, and then got on all fours, rested her head on the bed as her hands went behind and grabbed her ass cheeks.

The biggest hit to my shocked system was when she practically screamed that she wanted me in her ass.

This was Mandy Johnston, the same woman who had told me when our relationship had moved as far as the bedroom that her ass was all one way. Everything else was fine, and over the months I had known her she clearly liked to experiment; since we both seemed to be working our way down our wish list in the bedroom to a very harmonious conclusion. The one constant, and I would always respect it, was her ass. Did I decline or sit and discuss her offer? Hell no, MJ called all the shots that evening and that left no room for a debate.

I wasn't stupid, though; something had put her in this position and I wasn't referring to, all fours and in front of me. She looked once again at me and even wriggled her ass in the process. My mind overruled my dick in this; it had to. As my hands rested on her hips I held firmly, Mandy waited a moment longer and then let go of her ass. Her own anger was still apparent as she swatted my hands away from her hips and turned to sit and look directly at me, crossing her legs as she did.

"I offered you my ass and you didn't take it, why?"

Thinking that what I said next mattered a great deal to her, I paused a little longer to put words to my actions.

"You told me your ass is out of bounds. I've respected that from the time you told me and, other than grabbing your ass and the odd squeeze, I've let it be. Something has you rattled and I'm not doing your ass and regretting it much later."

A kaleidoscope of emotions crossed her face, some of them had me thinking I might be sleeping alone in the spare room for a few weeks when she gets up off the bed.

Her voice held a sort of quiver, almost like she was afraid to admit even that much. "I went to see Cindy."

She didn't need to pause; I knew my ex-wife's name. I did make myself comfortable on the bed, knowing this was a clear-the-air conversation from now on.

"She gave me the impression she was expecting me; she wanted out of your life but seems really pissed that I'm in it."

Mandy heard me sigh; she even paused expecting me to say something; sadly, she was disappointed.

"Our words were more like trying to score points off each other. In the end, her husband had to get between us; as I left, she told me you love anal and not a night went by that you were not in her ass whether it was her time of the month or not."

My hand moved to hold hers; she moved hers further back.

When she spoke again there was a tremor in her voice. "She says I'm not much of a girlfriend if I'm not putting out for you, so that means I'm going to be crap as a wife."

I knew what I said next was going to make thing worse no matter how I worded it, so pulling the covers back and inviting her to join me simply laid the groundwork. Mandy turned and then backed into me before the covers came back over us both and I held her in my arms.

The volume of my voice was lowered since my lips were so close to her ear. "I have a confession to make, and it's a true one. I'm a virgin."

MJ went to move but I held on tight and when she figured that I didn't want her to turn around she relaxed back into my arms. My only thought as I continued, was that this was the calm before the storm.

"From the day I broke puberty and grew hair all I could dream of were women in all their forms. Cindy was my sixth girlfriend and the one that stuck around long enough for me to have any kind of real connection with."

My skin picked up on the rise in body heat coming from Mandy at the mention of my ex's name.

"When I asked her to marry me she readily agreed, with one stipulation. Her ass was out of bounds, the only time I was ever allowed to touch it in all the time I was married was when she was clothed and that was only a gentle pat."

Her body stiffened and I got ready.

"That rule of hers was honored by me right up to and including through the time of the divorce."

I couldn't hold her as she spun round to face me. The question was there, I'm just not sure she was ready for the honest answer.

"But she told me, she bragged about how often you two did the dirty."

She had to see, to really know I wasn't lying to her, so it still took me a moment to confirm her own suspicions.

"She played you, MJ, and I'm sorry honey, but you allowed her to."

Mandy searched my face: I had nothing to hide. The days, weeks and months that I had been with this woman bore fruit that evening when she realized I wasn't lying. Holding onto her as she threw an absolute hissy-fit proved harder than even I imagined. Mandy Johnston had murder in her eyes and I was ever so grateful that it wasn't mine.

*******

We woke how we always liked to, in each other's arms. Her smile was pasted on and I knew why. I was just grateful that I acted the way I did, even down to my admitting my only secret. As I was making breakfast, she was on the phone to one of the senior partners requesting a day off. That made me look more closely at her; Mandy had never been sick in all the time I had known her.

The smile had improved by the time she joined me for breakfast. "I would be worth shit if I turned up at work today. I need the day to get my head straight." Her hand came out and held onto mine as though needing the connection. "I want to thank you for last night and I can only hope that you're okay with remaining a virgin."

This woman was the instigator most of the time in our bedroom antics, and any other room for that matter. She was the one who left me a sweating heap, gasping for breath. Mandy Johnston loved sex and I sure loved Mandy Johnston. Why the hell would I be bothered if she wanted to keep anal off the table?...and I told her so. She sure blushed when I mentioned how insatiable she was.

"I love your cock and the person it's attached to holds my heart." Her eyes locked onto mine. "You rock my world and always will but, I'm sorry, hun, there are only two holes in this woman you get a free play with."

It wasn't even worth thinking about; I wasn't going to miss something I'd never tried, so why worry about it?

I held her hand just a little tighter and said, "Deal."

The news came on the radio then, reminding me of the time. I left her sitting at the breakfast table and in better spirits than a few hours ago, that was for sure.

I got a phone call from MJ later that afternoon; my mind's eye had her bouncing off of walls because she sounded that happy.

"I'm with Josie. Her folks want to move to a sunnier climate and want to pad out their retirement. Mac, the cabin is going to go up for sale and we have been given first refusal."

The cabin was perhaps the glue that fixed us; the time we spent on the porch, either with Mandy on my lap or the chair next to me, was probably half the time we actually spent there. It was a slam dunk for me and perhaps a way of doing what I'd spent some time thinking about.

"I tell you what, MJ, we will only buy the place if we can have the wedding there."

The pause came first, the sniffles came next and I could hear Josie in the background asking Mandy if she was okay. She managed the squeak out the word "Deal" before the phone was taken away from her and Josie came on the line.

"What have you done to her?"

I needed to nip Josie in the bud and quickly. "I asked her to marry me, well sort of."

The pause was sure longer this time around. "Judging by the look on our girl's face, I'm taking that as a yes. You sure managed to swerve out of the way of that one, buster. I want to be able to see you on one knee the next time you're here."

The phone fell silent after that and I still had a couple of hours before I could leave. It was me that was worth shit at work that afternoon.

*******

The sale of the cabin took almost three months. Neither of us had any idea how much land was attached to the property until we looked at the deeds. Over the coming years, we must have trod over most of it.

On hearing about my proposal, Josie's parents gave us permission to use the cabin to hold the wedding; they even offered us the furnishings as a wedding gift, they had already spent the weekend up there and taken anything they deemed as personal, so it gave them some relief when we agreed. MJ and I were up there the next weekend and had to drag Josie along with us. The wedding planner came up under her own steam, and while I made the drinks, they all went into a huddle and seemed to speak a foreign language for the next few hours.

The planner took copious notes and used a tape-measure on everything: I have to admit I was starting to get really bored of hearing that thing retract and clatter when it was rewound.

When Mandy attempted to go into details, I held up my hand and stopped her. "I'm not trying to be rude, Mandy, but it's your day. I will nod in agreement, write the checks and turn up on time to watch you walk down the aisle."

Holding her close was easy; her body just seemed to be built to make contact with me in all the right places.

"I love you, MJ. Every day I thank Josie for dropping your ass at my table and you inserting yourself into my stale old life. You are my other half, Mandy, and, when I stand in front of you, I may even stutter when I say, 'I do,' but know that those two words do actually come from my heart."

She was gentle with me that night, she left me with enough energy to get to the bathroom to shower and promised not to join me so that I had enough energy left to get out again.

Everyday I thank the stars—and of course Josie—for bringing this woman into my life. I just wonder who our children are going to look like. I think I may have to go out and buy a shotgun if we have girls.