All Comments on 'The Enchanted Boy Ch. 07'

It's an intriguing tale. Sometimes it just gets a bit silly with cum shooting 7 or 8 feet but I've taken the good and accepted some of that as an awakening for inexperienced boys. I am wondering where the map is now. You've managed to keep me reading so I hope you keep writing. I think an editor would be a help to catch small mistakes and maybe help you round it out a bit once in a while. I laughed very hard when they said to Raphael 'you got the map but not our clothes' and he just shrugs. lol. I think they should have checked on the theol to make sure he was gone. But, I get he was old (really old) and he'd have gladly sacraficed his life for his great-grandson. Well, try to keep it realistic with the sex so it doesn't come off as goofy at those points and take from the story. I think it also would be good to think about human behavior a bit in such times like Vernon accepting he's gay so easily. A man of that age would have had more trouble I'd think. Maybe having him struggle with it a bit more first would have felt more real than easily just telling his son, 'hey I think I'm gay too'. I only say b/c it is a good story and I felt like the lack of realistic reactions detracts a tiny bit. Aside from that, good tale and I look forward to seeing where it goes. Keep the humor mixed in and the emotional parts. Keep writing