All Comments on 'The Family Business Ch. 03'

I was enjoying the story up until you decided to add uncle wes. Completely ruined it. I had to scan through til it was over. Why do writers seem to need to keep adding more and more males to a story that has enough already? Its overkill and not exciting or erotic. Ive seen at least four stories recently ruined with this lame method of continuing to add new characters instead of telling us about the ones already in the story.

I've really enjoyed how you've continued the series. I was happy to see chapter 2, but it wasn't until this chapter that I thought you've really hit your stride with this story. Not only did I feel there was more action in this chapter, but I also thought the pacing and momentum of the overall story was well executed. You introduced some great new characters and pairings, all the while teasing for more to come. Things seem to be really hitting a head, and just like Leon22's worlds, you're giving us an entire universe of incestuous pairings. You're surrounding the main characters with voyeuristic incest, amping up the temptation.

I was okay with Nicole getting it on with the uncle, as the pairing was hot, and hinted at an even more taboo past. I don't know if all these pairings necessarily need to feed into the greater main plot of the "business," but it works, and I'm okay with it. Keep up the great work.

yeah adding the uncle was a waste. why isnt the young bucks not just fucking every chick that moves in these three families. uncle wes is a throwaway scene at best and adds zero this story about 3 dudes screwing females on camera. hope thats his only scene because hes worthless to what was already established. a 3 but could have been a 5.

I disagree with the other person who complained about new characters. It adds to the narrative. Please don't make us wait as long for the next installment. Great job!

Thanks!

Need to remember that Brad is the family lawyer, not the accountant -- big difference. Also might want to stay away from English euphemisms, stick with American euphemisms (down the pan may be proper in British English, but in American English it would be down the drain). Also try to remember that words in the "Queen's English" that end in 'ise' like realise, need to end in 'ize' for realize. Not really complaining, but it may help to solidify this since it is based on action in the U.S.

I wasn't a huge fan of the uncle to be honest. I think if you already have the two brothers and their friend why add another male to the mix it should be another female is anything. But I honestly still really enjoyed it either way and look forward to seeing what happens next.

Sorry for the title, but it is another great one! Reading most of your work I wonder if some one like john persons would do illustrations!! Even if must character profiles so to speak.

Overa cant wait fot more, and somewhat mixed on the uncle.... Oh well, you have a way with these things - lets see where it goes.

more please..?

Do you have any plans on finishing stories from other writers? Zaxxon and his Westville series comes to mind.

can't wait for more. thanks.

Look, the odds of being born with a dick 9 inches is about the same as finding a four leaf clover. About one in 100 thousand. Being born with a 12 inch dick is as likely as winning the Mega Lottery. Twice. Back to back. They are highly uncommon even in the porn industry. Suddenly you introduce a FOURTH guy with a 12 inch dick to a group of NINE people?! Come fucking on. The impossibility completely ruins this. Just say Uncle Wes is also a Jedi Knight so we can move to sci fi/fantasy and get it over with. Everyone in the story might as well be billionaires. It's all just as likely. I get that this is erotic fantasy but now it's completely warping reality into something no longer fun.

There's to many men to females, would have been better to just have the young men for this story.

Love the series so far!

this series is the best i have had this far on literotica.......big dick big tits bangs my mind......

and great! very sexy - and even a little humorous. whatta fun read. 5 stars.