All Comments on 'The First Noel'

Thanks very much for a very well-written, super erotic, mom-son story. I love this genre and you write of it very well. I hope to read much more from this author.

Minor slip-ups here and there, but otherwise Practically Perfect in Every Way. Just get an editor (there are many available here) to run over your final draft and fix these.

You need a proofreader. Good story!

There's a difference, learn that difference and apply appropriately. Otherwise, great story, keep it up.

Good story minor grammatical errors. A lot of authors put come instead of cum. It gives me the drive to finish my story

Got a little confused when the 'her' and 'his'. Other than that! Amazing!!! Had a great orgasm! ;)

B-O-RRRRRR-I-N-G AS A "SEX" STORY, over 2/3's of the way through..... no sex. need to proof read and correct.... 90% of the time you typed " her" but meant "he"....you have the idea however seem hung up on the non sex aspect , but doing so on a sex web page....please give it another try ,I can see you " COULD" do better

Thank you for all the comments. This is my first submission and I hope to write more in the future. I apologize for all the 'his/her' confusion, and I should've done a better job at proofreading. I will do better next time. Thank you!

I was so engrossed in the story I never noticed any grammatical errors.

If you write more I think you will find that there is a surfeit of pseudo literary critics on Literotica.

I commend you on your first issue into writing BRAVO ! As for the His/Her mistakes don't let it bother you . You will get better as you write other issues . I think you did an excellent on this one . If you feel you need a proofreader there are plenty that have a ton of experience available to you in this group wish I was one but I am not .I am dyslexic so not a good choice . I hope you will continue to write as you have a gift don't squander it , and don't let the nay sayers hinder you . YOU DID GOOD !

Some of them don't apparate story building but you did well .

Thanks for the read . Oh by the way 5*'s too .

tx cracker

I hope you have noticed all the 'bad' commenters are too scared to leave their name and all those who actually have something to say are proud to identify themselves.

I have 5 stories on here, my first 2 are shit and I got some really bad responses. Fortunately I ignored the rubbish and listened to the people that offered advise, I eventually found a great editor too!

I'm guessing, by the number of he/her errors that this story was originally a daughter and you swapped it, it did get confusing but don't worry about it as the story itself is written well enough to shine through.

Now for the complaint, I have an almost identical story nearly finished, which will never see the light of day as this is so much better than mine.

.........and this is a very good one. Anyone who says they come here for the grammar and usage is lying to his or herself. It's the stories and this is a very well done one. Ignore the English teachers and continue to do your thing. Loved this story.

This is a terrific first contribution, and to add to the delightful surprise, the author is a very young guy, in his early 20s, so we have years of excellent stories to look forward to. The saga of 19 year old Noah and his mother Angela is heartwarming and at the same time balls-clutchingly hot. It's a story that occurs untold times in every ethnic group, all over the county. Literally untold. Guys who fuck their own mothers aren't inclined to blab and their moms even less so. But sweet motherfucking is all over the net, which tells us two things. It's an immensely popular topic, and it's a constant thought-provoking stimulus. Boys read about it and something deep inside begins to speak to them. "Shit! I bet lots of guys are getting their dick up between their mother's legs, right up into the same cunt they came out of. And their mothers, who love them to pieces anyway, welcome their baby boy with a big smile and thighs spread wide. Hmm. I wonder if mom..." Society makes this the absolutely worst taboo of all, so of course kids like Noah and moms like Angela are torn and conflicted. But, often, as with this courageous couple, nature wins out. The son's fat young cock goes up into his mother's warm wet cunt, they have themselves a delirious fuck--the by far best fuck of their lives--and the boy ends by unloading his young balls and shooting his mommy a great big twatful of his creamy semen. It's the best gift sons can ever give their beloved mother and the gift mothers appreciate more than other from their beloved son.

I loved your story! Especially when I realized it was your first one (I checked to see what else you had written). Keep up the great work and thanks for sharing it with us.

I noticed you had some unsavory comments..Take those with a grain of salt. For some reason I have yet to understand if they don't like a story then why spend their time reading it? I spend most of my life working in either farm, retail or industrial workplaces..There will always be people that aren't happy about almost anything. Just ignore them! Feel good about your story :-) I look forward to reading your next one!

Congratulations on your first submission. I did notice a few pronoun problems, however I assumed it was because you were so consumed by the plot. I do think that for the next few submissions that you might prosper by finding an editor. It would make you aware of the errors you were making and thereby avoid those pitfalls in the future.

I wouldn't mind if you were to add another chapter to this story.

Again congratulations on your first endeavor.

I loved this story and I hope this is just the beginning of many more stories in the future. I did notice that you kept referring to Noah as her instead of him, so you may want to proof read and edit your stories in the future. If you would like, I would be honored to proof read and edit your future stories.

Great first submission. I too look forward to many more wonderful stories from you. Thanks for sharing your talent with us.

Can Noah have a bit of chest hair to tantalize his mother? She could trace that hair along his pecs, etc., and maybe even taste him?

I've read many mother & son sex stories. Most of the other stories also have the should I or shouldn't I theme. What I liked about this story was the 'fact or fiction'.

The fiction was the dreams and story that the mother dreamt & written. The fact was that she eventually had sex with her son.

I always laugh when I read the comments that the readers have to let you know your mistakes. First, this is a sex story not a NY Times best seller. I tell these critics if they can write a good sex story without mistakes then write a story or shut up/.

Nice story; keep up the good work.

well written, it felt so realistic.. great one dude !

thx u

5/5

watch your pronouns you seem to be fixed on "her" at times when you are referring to Noah as if you are trying to change "his" to "her" or what. that was kind of confusing and caused me to pause a few times to reread. other than the pronouns, it flowed well and had good content keep up the work

Will there be a chapter 2?

Searching up widowangel for the heck of it lol

Wow ... very nice story ... well written

Sequel is a MUST

Please continue .

Good luck

An excellent story. Very warm and tender. Great job ShyGentleman, this is an outstanding submission.

Thank you for all your comments. I appreciate it. But I feel the need to tell you all that I am not planning on writing a sequel to the story. I prefer to write new stories (although I have only written just this one) instead of a long continuation or sequel that might potentially destroy the original. The next story might not necessarily be in the same category, but there will be a next one nonetheless.

Well written and a thoughtful analysis of the dilemma both faced. It is not easy to elaborate with such clarity and intensity unless one had been there to whatever distance.

Narrative left me awed and speechless, we read it together and almost cried.

Lady, you did a great narrative.

why are your pronouns so off ??

The story was long and not that much passionate. The length could be reduced and the passionate parts could be increased

This is one of the best... Psichology perfect, speed of the story is credible.

the author kept referring to noah as her??? a tranny story? 3 stars