All Comments on 'The Gambler'

good story

Nice short story.

Both readers lol. I actually liked the suicide ending though.

One of the best flash vengeance tales I have read in a long time. Well done. Permanent mental trauma to both cheating assholes and some justice meted out.

5/5

But the BTB fan in me feels she got off too easy. She dates, moved away, appears to have a nice life with money to spare? But cheated on husband still has anger issues and not living very happily.

Tight little story. I honestly would have preferred the suicide ending with an aftermath epilogue. The wife's decent into abject insanity from witnessing her husband doming himself and the accompanying self flagellation. The playboy publicly revealed as a full blown sexual predator losing everything before finally being trapped and murdered himself. Food for thought, this was good, but it could be a lot more creative.

Having handcuffs at a specific time and knowing the bio of the lover means planning. That planning is not explained in the story. The husband is spilling his feeling, but keeps his cool enough to trick them.

Was he emotional, or cold-blooded ?

Protagonist motives are not clear.

- Divorce can be arranged without life threats

- Emotional pain can be achieved by sharing incriminating photos with friends and family

- Confession. There was nothing from the wife. The guy's explanation had no consequence, so it was not important.

Why the revolver ?

The wife "needed to be needed", so she found a lover.

The wife is also his "rock". His reason to quit gambling.

How can she be his rock and at the same time feel not needed enough to look for a lover ? Maybe he needs to become better at displaying affection, instead of pointing a gun and blaming other people ?

Well played!

5

No happy endings here. Good to see that he exposed Bob for the dirty sleaze that he really was. Like the Russian roulette mental torture on the cheating pair. I was really hoping Bob's luck would run out.

Thank you Gambler, lots of differing strong emotions in a flash story.

About as tight and perfect as you can get. Very good. The punishment fit the crime.

I liked it. I pictured Jerry dead and some kind of Saw type scenario to further the story. The extra ending was very PC of you, but personally I am getting tired of PC.

I laughed so hard at the ending. The sent message where he could borrow the gun was perfect.. BRAVO ..

You never had Barb explain why she had the affair.

Nice flash story. Good job.

Thanks, Ahaz. Write another when you get done with those finals, please. Randi.

Sorry but that one has been written before.

Just exceptional writing, well paced throughout. Not being able to write my way out of a wet paper bag, its really dark out there these days, so how about a laugh with a slapstick LW maybe? Stay Healthy

Good little story Thanks for posting and good luck with your exam!!

And you didn't waste our time about what size and flavor pizza they ordered with that phone on the corner table, the pink one.

Maybe if you had written more pages she might have gotten around to saying she was sorry. Glad he didn't waste his time either.

Thanks for the effort, one of the best.

Loved the ending! 5*

I don't think he'd do more than a few years: Handcuffs = unlawful restraint; Brandishing the gun = assault. Given the circumstances, he'd probably get minimum sentences, served concurrently.

i liked it! Great twist ending! No loving wife!

For plot and writing 5 *****

Burninglove

Great story, loved it. She was was a bitch, he made the predator pay. Her punishment should have been a bit steeper. But oh well, still a good ending.

Scores 4/5

Well done.

Right in the bullseye of Hanging by a Thread.

Respect!

Top ratings from me.

"I think both of my readers would be disappointed" lol ty for the read, enjoyed

Thanks!

Definitely good that you didn't do a hard stop at the last chamber, would have been all tension and no satisfactory release.

I got an out-loud chuckle when one of the commenters asked, "Why the revolver?"

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Quick answer: because if it had been an automatic, this flash story would have only been a short paragraph...(I am still chuckling.)

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Palming the sixth cartridge is MY kind of bet. (Oh, wait. I'm thinking automatic again...Bwahhahaha.)

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Reminds me of the blonde joke: The blonde, holding a loaded pistol to her temple says, "Quit laughing! You're next!"

Keep 'em comin'.

Very good, really hanging by a thread, you think the gut will ever touch a married woman again?

Thanks to Black Randi. This is some creative stuff you inspired

Brilliantly imagined and written tale. Personally, I preferred it without the epilogue - but excellent either way..

LA

Both ways

Second read so I cannot vote again one small nit to pick. If you open the cylinder on a revolver and point the barrel up the cartridges will fall out of the cylinder, if it is loaded.

Bland worthless story without plot with cliche ending. Basically just garbage.

I remember reading this story way back when. I gave it 4-stars but reading it again I bumped it up to 5-stars. I must have been in a bad mood the first time.

"Basically just garbage." - dark2donut2 describing himself in a sentence.

Very clever!

I did know that had 6 empty cylinders; he wasn't the type to kill himself. If he was he would have killed the man and himself leaving his wife to suffer a lifetime of emotional hell.

Well, that was fun.

That would be terrifying. Good that he inflicted a little suffering on the cheaters.

Nasty! Gripping and entertaining!

That was really good. Depressing, but good. I vote for a limited reconciliation followup ( together again but unmarried either her on a very short leash) :)

Confused as to why Gino’s thugs ‘worked him over’ if he was able to pay him off that same night???