by patric
I think you have the skills to do this professionally. You'd probably have to draw out her motivations and inner experiences of all this a bit more to appeal to the female-reader-driven erotic lit industry, but you've got great story-telling and dialogue chops.
Awesome story as always. Will be interesting to see how you take this further. I hope this is the start of a comeback. In any case, I really hope we won't have to wait another five years for chapter two.
Thanks for great story! "The Pimp" still my favorite story by Patric, but this one really hot.