The Last Chimes of Fall

Over the next couple of weeks nothing really changed much. We were making plans for our marriage of course but we hadn't told anyone but Ron so far. He couldn't have been happier.

Sandy had pretty much moved in with me so Ron had the quad to himself. At first Sandy felt a little guilty, but he convinced her he was enjoying the privacy.

My concern was Kris and the kids. I knew the news of my nuptials was going to hurt Kris, badly. I thought when the kids see that, maybe they'll turn against me. I was really worried. As much as I tried to hide it, I don't think I was doing a very good job. One night, while on the swing Sandy turned to me and looked into my eye. "You're worried about Kris, aren't you?" she asked.

"I'm sorry babe. As deep as the wounds go, I never wanted to hurt her and this is going to kill her, I just know it. I don't even know if we should invite her to the wedding. It would be like rubbing salt in her wounds, but how can I invite my daughters without inviting her? She might be hurt even worse. I just don't know what to do honey."

"I think Kris will be fine, honey. We're having lunch together tomorrow, I have been debating on telling her myself. I don't know if it would be easier coming from me or you."

I was shocked to hear they were having lunch together. I guess Sandy saw it on my face.

"Kris and I have actually become good friends. I got to know her at the party."

"Yes I noticed you two seemed to be hitting it off."

"When you didn't want to talk about what happened between you and her at the restaurant, I knew she must have hurt you very deeply and that hurt was still there. I thought at first, what a horrid woman she must be, but she's not is she? She's a very good person who made a horrible mistake and she paid for that mistake by losing the man she loves."

Sandy gently kissed me then went on. "Kris doesn't feel that's enough punishment though. Not only has she lost you but she has deprived herself of allowing any other love into her life, as well. I think I can release Kris from her self-imposed exile from love and I believe our marriage will help."

I sat and listened. I was still nervous about Kris and Sandy having lunch. I loved Sandy and wanted to put my trust and faith into her. "Honey, there's two problems here. One, I don't want to hurt Kris, and two, I don't want to alienate my kids."

"I know honey," she said. "And if you want me to back off I will. I can call and postpone our lunch until after you talk to her, but I do understand her, Brent, and I honestly believe I can help her."

I looked into Sandy's eyes. They were sympathetic. "Won't Kris think I'm wimping out letting you break the news instead of doing it myself?" I asked.

"No, I'll make sure of that. Honey she already knows. She knew from the first time we met."

"Yeah, I think you're right. I remember she said something when she helped during the move in. As she left she said she hoped we'd be very happy together."

"Please honey." Sandy lightly ran her fingers through my hair as she looked deep into my eyes. "Let me talk to her."

I was still a little apprehensive but I agreed to let Sandy break the news of our wedding to Kris the following day at lunch.

The next day I was like a cat on a hot tin roof. Everyone kept asking me if there was a problem. I assured them there was not but I don't know how convincing I was. I looked at my watch around noon and wondered if they were talking yet. I looked again about one o'clock and wondered if Sandy had told Kris about our wedding plans. Every minute I expected to get a call from a crying Kris or from my kids saying they never wanted to see me again.

By three o'clock I wondered why Sandy hadn't called yet to tell me how she took it. By three-thirty I was a basket case. A few minutes later the studio phone rang. Audrey grabbed it before I got there. "Brent, it's Sandy," she said.

"Hi, how did things go?" I asked. "Jeez, I've been on pins and needles, what took you so long to call?"

"Take it easy," she said with a small giggle. "We're girls remember, we just left each other. Kris and I had a long talk. I really do like her, Brent. I wish I could have met her years ago, I think I could have helped."

"Well...did you tell her? How did she take it?"

"Honey," Sandy said calmingly. "Please, everything is alright. You're going to have a heart attack if you don't settle down. I told you before, she already knew. When I told her, she took it in stride. She's going to explain everything to the kids tonight. I'm sure they'll call you and tell you how happy they are for you."

I couldn't believe it. I was so worried. As Sandy spoke It felt like a big boulder had been taken off my shoulders. I expelled the breath I had been holding for hours with an audible sigh.

Sure enough, later that evening the girls called me. "It's about time you found someone dad," Brea said. "Sandy is really nice. I like her a lot. So does mom. Catherine wants to know if you can still come over and..., oh alright," I heard Brea and Catherine starting to argue. "Just a minute dad, Catherine wants to ask you something. Here she is."

"Hi daddy."

"Hi pumpkin," I said.

"Daddy, will you still be able to come over and help us with our homework?"

"Of course I will honey," I told her. "I'm still as much your dad as I ever was."

"Good," said Catherine sounding a little relieved. "Then I'm happy for you too, daddy. I really like Sandy, she's nice."

Brea got on the extension and we all talked some more together. The girls sounded genuinely happy but as we all hung up it occurred to me, Kris never got on the phone. I wondered if maybe she didn't take the news as good as Sandy thought she did.

It was still on my mind the next day when I got a shock just before noon. "Hi daddy," I heard from the front of the studio. I looked around the corner and there was Kris with the girls.

"Well," I said while hugging everyone. "This is a surprise."

"We were down town doing some shopping and I wondered if you wanted to buy lunch for a wayward group of ladies?" asked Kris.

"I would be honored," I said.

Ron heard the voices and came out to say hi. We all exchanged pleasantries for a few minutes then I took my lovelies out for a nice meal.

"Hey dad," Brea said between bites of chicken. "Does Ron have a girlfriend?"

"Never mind there Pumpkin, he's too old for you. Beside what happened to what's his name, the guy you brought to the party?"

"Oh Mark? He's too immature. We broke up right after the party."

I knew he wasn't going to last long. We finished up and we all walked back to the studio. The girls went in the back for a few minutes to flirt with Ron which left Kris and I alone.

"Brent, I just wanted to tell you how truly happy I am for you. Sandy is a warm, affectionate, loving person; just the kind of woman you deserve. We had lunch together yesterday and...well, she convinced me that maybe I should open up to the possibility of finding someone as well. I will always love you my darling Brent, and I will never forgive myself for what I did to you. Yesterday Sandy told me I can live with the regret, but I don't have to go on punishing myself. I will never get you back, I know that. I think I always have. If I had to lose you to someone, I'm glad it was Sandy." She stepped closer and brought her lips close to mine. "Just one for old time sake?" she asked. I took her in my arms the way I used to, and kissed her, long and passionately. As we broke apart we both knew it would be the last time we ever kissed like that. She gave me a small smile before calling the girls and being on their way.

Sandy and I didn't have a lot of time to plan for a wedding. Ron would be going back to school in less than two months and I was planning on asking him to be my best man. Sandy said, since her son was going to be my best man, she wanted my daughters in her bridal party. Just like the party, what started out to be a small affair, grew into a full scale wedding. I didn't care. The more the merrier as far as I was concerned. I would share this day with the whole world if possible.

The wedding couldn't have been scripted any better by the best writers in Hollywood. It took place in an outdoor garden. Ron looked dashing as my best man and both Brea and Catherine looked like beautiful young adults in their formal bride's maid gowns. Sandy was a vision in her dress and I wore my favorite tie with my best suit. The tie was a two hundred dollar Italian silk tie; it was the last present Kris had given me before the divorce.

Later at the reception, I thought the day couldn't possibly be more perfect. I was standing with my new bride by my side when Kris walked up. She pulled my head down a little and kissed me on the cheek. "Congratulations you guys," she said to both of us. Then, to my surprise, she reached over to a gentleman I didn't recognize and pulled him in front of us. "I'd like you meet Allen," she said with big smile. "He's my date."

I immediately stuck out my hand. "Hi Allen, nice to meet you."

"And Brent," Kris said. "I think he has a lower handicap than you do."

"What? No way," I said jokingly. "What's your handicap?"

"Seven," he said a little bashfully.

"That's mine. As soon as we get back from our honeymoon you and I are going to have to hit the links."

With that he seemed to warm up some and really turned out to be a nice guy. I couldn't believe my lovely wife did it again. She was right, it took a woman's touch to bring Kris around. It was right after that I had my next humbling experience. As soon as the chance presented itself, Ron pulled me to a corner.

"This is going to sound really out there, Brent, but I never really got to know my dad very well. Well, now that you and mom are married...ah, you're going to think I'm nuts," he said.

"Ron, there is nothing you can't ask, tell, or talk to me about, please what is it?"

"Would you mind if I called you dad?" he asked. I was almost knocked off my feet. I had already regarded him as a son, but I wasn't expecting this.

"Son, I would be honored," I told him.

"Thanks," he said gratefully. "Listen, since you're in such a great mood, there is one more thing." I waited for the bomb to drop. "Can you talk to mom for me. I know she's not going to be too keen on the idea, but I'm going to change my major when I get back to school. I checked and with the credits I have, I can do it. I'm going to major in photography," he said.

If ever there was a night for surprises, this was it. Wait till I tell Sandy about this, I thought. I agreed to tell his mother and since he would be back in school by the time we got back, we hugged and said our goodbyes. When Sandy saw us she came over and they did the same. Sandy had tears in her eyes but Ron promised he would be back for Christmas. I thought to myself, great, I only have between now and Christmas to tell Sandy her son's not going to be an engineer like they both planned, but a photographer...great, just great. Then I couldn't help but smile to myself.

A little while later Sandy and I were headed for two glorious weeks in Maui where we both spent the most wonderful time of our lives. Before leaving I thought to myself, if there is a heaven, it's going to have to go some to beat this.

As we landed back in Chicago the trip may had been over but the honeymoon never ended. Life with Sandy was like living each day in a fairytale. Every day we grew closer, became even more compatible, and fell deeper and deeper in love.

To quote an old cliché, 'time marches on.' It sure does and at a very rapid pace, too rapid if you ask me. Ron changed his major to photography and, of course had a job waiting for him after graduation. I had waited until after our honeymoon to tell Sandy. When I did tell her, she was overjoyed with the change. She knew all along photography was his passion just as it was mine. Knowing he would learn the trade from me and probably take over the studio someday was a thrill for both of us.

Brea graduated and went into teaching. Yup, high school history; she met a great guy, got married, and I had two grandchildren.

Catherine surprised me by taking journalism in college, and maybe with a little influence from her old man, got a job right out of college with my alma mater, The Times. She also met someone and was married. No children yet, but as much in love as they were, I doubted that will take too long.

Kris married Allen. They too were a very happy couple. The more I was around Allen the more I liked him. The four of us developed a fantastic friendship. Sandy and I double dated with Kris and Allen a lot, not to mention Al and I were always on one course or another almost every week-end. One year the four of us even went on a cruise together.

Yup, Walt Disney couldn't have written a better life for Sandy and me.

Of course if we were home, almost every day would end with Sandy and I cuddling together on the back porch swing watching God with his paintbrush and listening to the wind serenade us, using only our chimes. Sandy said it sounded like a gentle rain hitting the wings of angels. Life simply couldn't be more perfect, Sandy and I couldn't have been happier.

I was sitting at the kitchen table when Sandy walked in and poured herself a cup of morning coffee. To me she looked worried, a look I wasn't used to at all. "What's the matter honey?" I was concerned. It just wasn't like her not to be smiling.

She sat next to me, took a sip from her cup and looked at me with a tear in her eye. I knew something was definitely wrong and I queried again. "Honey, what is it? Please tell me, what's wrong?"

"As I was getting dressed I found a lump in my breasts," she said quietly.

I wanted to go into panic mode but I couldn't. I had to remain calm and supportive for Sandy's sake. I reached for her hand. "Honey," I said trying to use a soothing voice. "Try not to worry. I'm not about to let anything happen to you. You know yourself most of these things turn out to be nothing at all."

I gave her hand a reassuring little shake. "We'll get you in for a checkup as soon as possible. You drink your coffee, I'm going to call the doctor right now and get it scheduled."

On the outside I was cool and in control. On the inside I was an absolute basket case. I called Sandy's doctor and scheduled an office visit first, maybe a biopsy wasn't even needed. Then I called Ron and told him I was going to take a few days off and for him to run the studio. He asked me if something was wrong but I didn't want to worry him so I just said Sandy and I were simply going to enjoy a few days to ourselves.

Later that afternoon I sat in the outer office while her doctor examined Sandy. After the exam I was called in and sat with my precious wife waiting to hear what the next step would be. The doctor confirmed a biopsy would be necessary and scheduled out-patient surgery at the hospital for later in the week. While we sat there he did try to comfort us by saying most likely it's nothing but he wanted to be on the safe side. We both agreed and I took Sandy out for a nice lunch after we left.

Of course I couldn't show it but I was so worried that trying to stay optimistic for Sandy's sake was one of the hardest things I ever had to do in my life. I drove her to the hospital and filled out all the forms while they prepped her. They let me see her just before taking her into the O.R. I kissed her, told her not to worry, and I would be waiting for her when she came out.

About an hour later my beeper went off signaling Sandy was out of surgery. I was by her side holding her hand as she awoke from the anesthetic. I took her home, called in her prescription for pain medication and had it delivered. For the rest of the day and night I waited on her hand and foot. By the following morning she was well enough to meet me at the breakfast table. Now it was just a waiting game.

Two days later the doctor called. He would not say what they found but only that he wanted to see us both in his office. I didn't say anything to Sandy, but I figured he would have given us good news right over the phone. I started silently praying to stay strong because all I wanted to do was break down and bawl like a baby.

Again we sat side by side holding hands opposite the doctor as he delivered the news. Sandy had a very progressive form of breast cancer and would need to have both breasts completely removed. Hearing the news Sandy collapsed in my arms. My first thought was why, with all the bad people in this world, why does something like this happen to someone like Sandy?

Still trying to stay brave I held her and comforted her as much as I could. The doctor wanted to get the surgery scheduled as soon as possible and said it would be followed up with Chemotherapy and Radiation to kill any leftover cells. He said after that they can do breast reconstruction surgery.

The doctor gave me something to help her rest so I put her to bed when we got home. It was time to start making phone calls. I was not looking forward it. How was I expected to talk about it without falling to pieces?

I managed to get through my conversations with Ron and Kris but asked them to call everyone else. I just couldn't talk about it anymore.

On the day of her surgery the entire family was there. I stayed with Sandy as long as I could, but after the nurse wheeled her into the operating room, I disappeared. I guess everyone was searching the entire hospital for me but no one thought to look in the chapel. It was Kris who figured out where I'd be. When she quietly entered she found me on my knees making every bargain, every promise, and even offering a swap of my life for hers to the man upstairs.

The surgery took several hours, but for me, it was an eternity. I was the only one they would allow in the recovery room with her so after hearing she made it through the surgery okay, the rest of the family went home for the night.

For the next five days, while she remained in the hospital, the only time I left Sandy's side was when Ron would relieve me so I could go home, shower, and change clothes. When I was finally able to bring her home the entire family and several friends were there to welcome her. It was so great to see her actually smile again as so many worked so hard to cheer her up.

Over the next few weeks we tried to live as normal a life as we could but it was hard. The Chemo and radiation treatments were taking their toll. Even with medication to lesson her nausea, Sandy was finding it difficult to eat and was throwing up. As a result she was losing weight, her complexion was losing color, and she was becoming more frail every day.

I was nervous when I had to bring her in for her next checkup. I had been contributing her condition to the treatments, but in my heart I was afraid.

After the exam her doctor readmitted her to the hospital. I was on my way to her room when I saw him walking toward me in the hall.

"What's going on?" I asked. "Why is she back in the hospital?"

He looked into my eyes and I could tell from his expression he was about to deliver more bad news. "I'm sorry, Brent," he said softly. "The cancer is not responding to the treatments like we'd hoped. It is spreading throughout her body. At this point," he paused. "I'm sorry, there's just nothing more we can do."

My grief turned to rage. What the hell do you mean there's nothing more you can do, I thought. I reached out and grabbed the lapels of his white coat and pulled him with-in inches of my angry face. "Now you listen to me, as far as you're concerned that woman in there is the president of the United States, you hear me. She's the fucking president and you're going to save her."

Just then I felt a hand on my shoulder. I looked to see Allen and Kris standing next to me. "We're so sorry, Brent," Allen told me. "But it won't do any good to threaten the doctors; it's out of their hands now."