All Comments on 'The Low Road'

A damn fine story!!!

5+

Wonderful story. Not like the usual crap here.

I know...I have been to exactly 35 in my lifetime. Well written and I am looking forward to your next story. Thanks.

Wow. It’s been more than a decade and literotica continues to surprise me with good stories like this. I’m always looking for a happy ending I guess.

I can't give it the 6 stars it deserves.

DAMN well done, sir. Thank you.

Amazing, thankyou so much...5* x 10

usual Todd-story, but I still kinda liked it

4starrs

Although fiction, shows the human condition where good prevails. Thanks for the story. 5*

You got me up in here bawling like a little p*ssy!

Damn that was good!!!!! I was wondering where this was going and nearly gave up. I didn't see the plot twist with the 4 girls. At the very end I started crying. (Thus the 3 stars. Was going for 4 but.....) As a 20 year Vet I salute you for this outstanding story.

Should have been 4 stars

DragonRider55 Tsgt USAF

If you have to go, his was a good ending. As always, it's a pleasure to read your work.

Damn near what I would consider the perfect loving wives story. Awesome is the best way to describe it! Please keep writing. Also, please, let us say a brief prayer of thanks for every service member, past and present, they are all hero's!

Never saw the hook till the very last word, as it should be. 5* and 5 again.

WOW! What an emotional punch!

At short stories

One more good story got shared.

Thanks!

I hope the bookdeal with you and the Missus

is going well.

My credit card is waiting to be used

on something else than Malt Whisky

and Havana cigars.

Top ratings from me.

When you move on to doing this for money, and you will, please let us know where we can go to follow your work. As always: OUTSTANDING!

Gut Punch *****

yehudi

This one had a old man crying like a baby.

A story that shows in its profound way possibilities how people can deal with each other! It tells very sensitively and hits the nerve of our time! I didn't think I could find such a good story on literotica! Thank you!

We know not how long our lives will be, so live it well. Those the love you can share in the joy, those that are just friends can cherish the warmth, those that hate you can stew in their own bitterness.

A bit over the top, in that even strippers know how to dress for a funeral, but still a 5 from me.

This was LOVING WIFE story of the decade!

Truly brilliant writing. 5

Unique

I always love it when a Todd172 is posted. I go to that first. Your interpretation of the Highway Song contest is unique and creativity at its best.

Thanks for the story. 5's

As always a very well thought out story, and well written with lots of feeling for the main character. Todd, you are Awesome!

Your one of my favorite authors here. Please keep writing.

Loved this story, Sgt Schnell's life ended with his real family around him, and his past was just that, forgotten in the dust!

Thank you for a brilliant story. Although sad, it is a beautiful story of hope.

Thank you!

Nicely crafted but it was disgraceful that he did not stick to his vows, as everyone knows marriage is forever no matter.... oh fuck, who am I kidding.

Loved the turnabout on Janice and his mum, just cos you're blood, doesn't mean you deserve anything.

The mention of Tony's surname was so fleeting I had to go back to put it all together. That I wanted to find out, for me, is testament to the strength of the story.

Thanks for sharing.

Very touching story

I really enjoyed your story. 72 years old and it brought back some fond memories. Soldier also. Damn the lowlife ex. Always thought that my Sgt Major made our lives better. Thank you. Great ending.

God Bless you Peter Schnell, or whatever your name was in real life.

Excellent work. Very touching.

Retire the damn trophy. Best story I’ve read on here

About the cheating wife and sister of that one soldier. Goosebumps.

Just to let you know, there was no grit in my eyes.

Such a good story and based on a true story?

That makes it even more poignant.

This is one of your best stories ever.

5 stars only because I can’t give you more.

It's amazing that you could write such a poignant story using only one literotica page. Well done.

Great Read!

My compliments to you and the missus, excellent story telling.

That it's rooted in reality, makes it all the more poignant.

I'm an old soldier. I can recognize a Schnell I knew from your descriptions. His story, I never learned the ending to, just that he had passed.

From now on, when I think of him, this story will be his.

Thank you for this.

You and the Missus are storytellers par excellence. Take care. We're living through more interesting times. And thanks for the stories. 5's of course. I don't grade them; just say what I see. Maybe grade myself against them.

As usual great story!

And again, wonderful.

Wow I did not see that coming. Had to read it twice. This story is a gem.

An absolute gem.

An amazing story. You had this 69 year old Vietnam veteran in tears at the end. Keep up the outstanding work.

So... would you take that deal: a lifetime in hell, as a loser, for a single year in heaven, as a stud?

'Sure makes you think... As I've heard someone said once, it's not how you get in the game or how you were in it that is important, but how you got out of it.

And, evidently, Peter Schnell got out of it like a king.

It will always surprise me to read stories about mothers who truly despise their own children. Not saying it's not possible - I've seen for myself examples of this in RL, but what can I say... It's shocking. To have spent nine months carrying a life, just so you can treat it like shit for its entire lifetime... there's a special place in hell for people like that.

'Currently going through the whole Shack series right now, so 'am not the least bit surprise that I love this short tale. Thank you for the share, Todd.

What a marvelous story!!! Well done and well written. There is nothing ambiguous about the brotherhood of arms. SF VET

Superb as always but in my opinion you are best writer on this site. The final twist and my eyes are still tearing up. You ability to tell a story with humanity is amazing. God Bless all our service members and my best wishes on this St. Patrick's day.

I'm sometimes thankful for my bad memory, so I was able to enjoy the ending again.

Sitting here on a dreary Saint Paddy's day morning, locked down, Bars closed, due to that Chink Virus, low and behold there's a new Todd172 story on Lit! Oh Happy days, I swear my whole day improved, and your story did not disappoint. Thank you so much for your wonderful stories. Semper Fi!

I have been waiting since last year for your newest story . Like most of your stories 5 stars . You and your missus are a brilliant team . Please bring them on as fast as you can .

You hit the nail on the head in so many ways. In my 22 years of military service I have seen everything in this story to one degree or another. At first I thought this story was a "2" but by the end I had to go with "5". Remember, the Army takes care of its own.

glad he ended up with someone that cared for him

We have all known a Schnell. Hell, I am/was one. Unlike the story, i have a wonderful and supportive family. Truthfully, luck has rarely been on my side. My mother always says "how does the worst shit always seem to happen to you?" Lol its really true but I have learned to take it in stride. Its been easier since a little bit of luck and love came my way about 14 years ago when i met my second wife and then 4 when my daughter was born. Never thought we would be parents, we tried and failed for years, countless treatments, 2 miscarriages and 1 necessary termination. We gave up and 10 months later a 10 pound 6 ounce red head spitfire came into our lives. Makes dealing with the shit a whole lot easier.

Thanks for the story Todd. We Schnells appreciate it

Great story with a great twist.

When I read your stories with military folk, it hits home. Sometimes, too close to home. Especially with the funerals... brings tears to my eyes and that's not a good sign (for me), though it speaks volumes of the quality of your stories and writing. I spent a long time in the green suit and I'm a bit long in the tooth now, but the stories make me miss it. Even the painful parts. We don't do it for public acclaim, but for our Brothers in Arms. Even those we don't know that well...

They just keep on coming another stunning story

This was by far the best story,( but very sad) I have read on this site. I don't think it can be surpassed.

in just about every way. Heartfelt, beautifully written, impossible to predict, and just the right length for the story you have to tell. It's just a gem.

Thanks, ohio

Loved your story.

One of your best and I had serious chills at the reveal. Well done

Who could say anything bad about this story? Excellent job. Great read. Took up my lunch break, but it was worth it.

As a former soldier who served in the infantry in Vietnam (yea I’m old), thank you for sharing this story.

Ed

Most excellent story, Sir!

I have to say with all of the dust today, my allergies makes it hard to see.

Thank you!

Disgrace the men in uniform and then have all of your phony accounts pat you on the back. This piece lacked character development and the ending was pathetically rushed

though now I seem to be focusing on the method rather than the narrative.

Protagonist not narrator? Tends to free up the possibilities of making characters "larger than life" if you don't have to speak in their voice. How you dealt with Jinxy comes to mind.

I did find Laura to be one of my favorites of your characters - Amber seems like Laura redux... it would be nice to have more of a story around her, but I don't see how her story could continue from here. Perhaps a prequel, perhaps a retelling... anyway, not necessary but intriguing.

Hope all is well with your and yours,

Green-something

Well done. I was especially glad Schnell got over on his ex-wife and mother. Always good to see evil get its just reward. Clever little story. Thanks for the effort.

5 stars

Damn good story. Now I'll probably sit here for another hour, dog on the couch beside me, thinking about my time in Army starting back in '71

That was an amazing story!!

Nice short story. Thanks.

This was already the Loving wives version of One Million Words or The Rehab(look both of those up if you really wanna be sad and happy at the same time) when the man died of cancer, but then you found a way to rip my heart out TWICE at the very last second? Dude. That's emotional warfare!

Thank you

You have got some skillz, dude!

Well done and emotionally charged. Nice job!

I've discovered "68 Whiskey" the new MASH like TV series on Paramount TV Network.

I swear it reminds me of your writing and stories.

Lots of "misfits" and loving wives/girlfriends angst. Lots of dark humor and normal living Catch-22 dilemmas people try to struggle thru.

Keep on keeping on - PLEASE!

Why would SM know what FS wanted to know about the funeral a year later?

A sad soldier who did the best that he could with what he had. In the end he found some happiness and got his “revenge” on the people who didn’t love him. Thanks for sharing.

What a fine story. Makes you think. Nice to hope that sacrifice and valor was rewarded after all. Mother and skank ex, got their just deserts.

Thank You again.

Nice.

Too many Army stories blame Jodie.

I can't tell you how close you story is to two differnt domestic stories from Grafenwohr 1980. Lets just say a prior secret vacectomy changed a lot of shit for a housewife that was really a pregnant whore.

Wow, this one is a 7* at least! Great twist, never saw it coming..... Hooyah, salute! USN-CPO, Vietnam.

Great, well written. As an ex-infantry man brought tears to my eyes.

You sir, can write.

So glad to see another tale by you, you are one of the best on here with characterization and depth.

Thanks for sharing your gift with us.

5/5

Agreed with another commentator, a well crafted short story...

It had enough twist and turns I didn't even see the last sentence coming and I am usually really good at catching these things. Todd, I have liked, disliked and down-right hated some of your previous stories but I have to say, this little ditty was one of your best. You could have probably dragged it out into much more but I doubt it would have made a difference, in fact, I think it would have hurt the story. It was written to near perfection for what it was.

Well done Sir and I salute you.

That is all.

A very nice story. Well thought out and written. I enjoyed and please keep writing!

Thanks for the story.

"Buckeye Fan"

Excellent story, I do believe the author was a senior NCO. The story as accurate, innovative, very powerful, and very well written. Very nice twist at the end.

I sent a link to this story to a bunch of fellow veterans.

I had to write a posting on Facebook, explaining the concept of "Jody" for my civilian friends. You didn't include it and your story really didn't need it. A cheating spouse for a deployed soldier is a universally understood distasteful idea. My ex left me for Jody when I was in Afghanistan and elsewhere in 2001/2002.

There is a lot to like, and that a baby cares on his name, because he was good man. The ending is so righteous.

Reminds me of a kid I barely knew. Back in the early 80's a kid was literally new to the unit, I don't even remember his assignment, fresh out of boot camp maybe a few months as I recall, and he looked so young. Crossing the street to go home for chow, he was hit by some asshole who was drunk and late to report. The kid lingered a few days, some pretty young girl came to be with him, I don't recall either of their names, I am getting really old. He had not been assigned long enough to make real friends, or so I thought, so I went to the funeral so it would not be empty. Seen to many ugly returns in the early 70's. At first, she was there alone. I found out that they were both alone in the world, met each other in high school, her mom was a drunk, dad unknown. His parents disowned him when he took up with her. He had defended her "honor" at a party and she fell for him like white on rice, but when his parents said "drop her or no college" he decided to join up because we were paying bonuses back then, and they could get married which they had as soon as he was through basic. They honeymooned in base housing. Only a few weeks together really when he was killed. It was just after Christmas when he died, the funeral was empty except for a couple people, me and her, then slowly more people came, one guy after another even a few wives. Turns out they had adopted all the singles, if you could not get home to Thanksgiving, they would take you, same for Christmas, on and on. They all chipped in for food, she was a great cook, had to be fending for herself from age 9. She could sew, and soldiers always need something fixed. She was loved by the base wives who gathered her up and helped her from her first day, and from what I found, I heard rumors that she helped company commanders wife after they lost their first baby, cooked, cleaned and cried with her. Before the service was started it was standing room only. I will remember it till the day I die. Not here long, no great medals or victories, but a good but short life well lived. Unfortunately they did not have time to start a family, as in youth there is always tomorrow, until there isn't. I never heard what happened to her, she had to leave base housing after, the life insurance was not great back then so I suppose she found a way. Of course his family wanted nothing to do with her, did not even attend the funeral, I did her a story, which I believe, that the wife of the base commander pulled some family strings of her own and got her into college to become a counselor. I bet she would be a great one.

I’m a damn fool but, I still believe in romance - good for Schnell! And thanks for the story!

Well done indeed.

As a veteran I laughed out loud with the line, "but no Soldier is ever beyond the reach of a truly pissed off Sergeant Major." my next response was, "AMEN! Brother"

Loved the twist at the end. The hero sounded like a decent human being who at least found some happiness toward the end. Thanks for sharing.

It would be a shame to enjoy a story this much and not be able to express my gratitude to the author.

Keep it up.

Even if it wasn't exactly a "Highway Song" and even though "Drive" is scoring better, this is better, hits harder, and gets extra points for being concise.

Loved your story. Now I will have your entire body of work to enjoy. My job won't be quarantined unfortunately. More road trips, more time to read. You haven't done a bad story yet.

That was just so good in every way. The throwaway at the beginning that explained the end, the enormous heartbreak, the rage at evil characters, the sad playout and the final twist that had me paging back frantically to make sure I had it right. The death of everyman.

Just as good on the second read.

Thank you, sir! Finest writing, finest reading.

You always write great stories. This one was one of the best.

Outstanding story, 5 star effort! *****