All Comments on 'The Mountain'

by DreamCloud

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  • 379 Comments
Keoni1791Keoni1791over 8 years ago

Loved it! You have no idea how much I look forward to your works.

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
Wonderful!

Thank you for a wonderful story! This is the best story I have read in quite a while.

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
New favorite author

I just discovered your stories last week and have read everything you've written here on Lit. I had never checked dates and had assumed I was discovering a currently inactive author. Imagine my delight when I discovered a brand new story today! I'm afraid I haven't got any work done yet this morning - but it was totally worth it. Well do e. Please keep writing!

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
Wish I could give you a galaxy of stars

A translator myself, I couldn't suppress a chuckle about the interrupters, I mean interpreters :-)

That aside, the story is a sparkling gem.

Thank you for this wonderful story

Rampage62468Rampage62468over 8 years ago
Always go to the last page first.

I always make sure it ends happily... Ever since The Rehab... Will not fall down into the hole of crying my eyes out.

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
Thanks So MUCH!

Another amazing story! I liked how you could have cut off two or three pages and gone for the simpler Happy Ever After ending, but instead had to wrestle that last twist and bit of mystery intrique into there. Sure, we knew he would get the girl in the end (this IS romance), but by giving us something a little more, well......MORE..... only goes to show new readers exactly WHY every Dreamcloud story earns its red H!

So again, Thank you very much!

I will say I had a little problem suspending my disbelief over him fresh out of rehab, and being quite as active as he was with little to no residual issues over his leg injuries. Learning to walk again is one thing. Energetic lovemaking, running around in the park, hiking the mountain again, kicking (literally) a guy's ass........That might have been a little past his abilities only less than a year out from the coma period.

However, there is a rule somewhere that says you as an author are allowed ONE big suspension of disbelief per story. Too many, and the readers can't stay with you because it becomes cartoon like. But sometimes I wonder when reading your stories, if you took everything into account when creating some of the amazing things that happen to your characters. Here, the S.O.D. is in his almost superhuman ability to heal. But if a reader isn't carefull, all of his antics add up to one SOD after the other, and just might be too much. Sometimes the fix is simple. Adding a sentance here or there by way of explanation, or even perhaps tweeking the timeline. Personally, I think you write at a level that you could go pro, and SELL your published work. However, I can only imagine some high-powered editor still calling you out for the suspension of disbelief thing.

No matter, while these stories remain free here on this site, I think you can safely enjoy your reputation as being Top Dog on this site. The best of the best, and I hope those red Hs of gratitude are enough to keep you here writing for us! Can't wait for your next.....lucky for ALL of us, it never seems to be that long of a wait. And I thank you for THAT so much as well!

welcome007welcome007over 8 years ago
excellent story

truly a five star

great story

please write more stories

gt_readergt_readerover 8 years ago
Deserves Six Stars

A fantastic story.

GrandPaMGrandPaMover 8 years ago
Dang - makes me want to start learning Armenian!

yeah - the story was THAT good.

5* - with regrets that I can't offer more.

gravyruggravyrugover 8 years ago
One of a few

There are a few stories that I rate at five in spite of a glaring need for better editing, and this is one of them. Ramen/Ramon, interpreter/interrupter, could almost have been find/replace errors, except each was used correctly once before the replacements. The story was good enough, though, that they were a chuckle, rather than a serious distraction. Well done.

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
Outstanding

The story and the imagination behind it are both outstanding.

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
Great, Simply great!

I am a big fan of your stories. This was a little longer than some but the ending was well worth the wait. I gave you a "5" only because there was not a "6". Well done.

jd

ResidentWeavilResidentWeavilover 8 years ago
Loved it

What is the opposite of 'damned by faint praise'? I would like to know since when I say this was not one of your best, it is meant more as compliment to the others than an insult this this one. Maybe a 4.9 rather than the 5.0 of several of your others.

I had a hard time getting into the idea that they could have a real attachment after surviving and not really being able to know much about each other. I was able to get past that but I think it is a case where I might have had an easier time with it is I had a visual image of them growing close. Like many of your other stories, it reads very much like a screenplay we might see on the Hallmark Channel. In a good way.

Wonderfully touching and romantic. I expect we will find it filling yet another slot in the top ten list. Though I am sort of hoping it won't. You are not leaving much room for the other very good writers here at the moment.

rightbankrightbankover 8 years ago
thanks for another wonderful love story

the betrayal by Doug was a surprise. as was the discovery by accident of new friends in Peru.

I learned a new truism, never underestimate the power of a woman's intuition.

your imagination took us on an interesting ride.

dreaming_dailydreaming_dailyover 8 years ago
Excellent

Loved your story very much. The description of the interaction between the parents and Melanie is spot on. Especially how Melanie reacts to water.

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago

Wow... You write the best stories. Thank yuo for sharing your knowlegde. I loved it

calgarycamperscalgarycampersover 8 years ago
Another Great Story!

I had to read it in one sitting. Fantastic story!

arrowglassarrowglassover 8 years ago
What a terrific tale!

So enjoy your stories...really liked this one...another favorite!

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
Wonderful

It was a wonderful story. I couldn't wait to finish it. It really drew me in and the plot twist was unexpected and delightful. Keep up with your writing. I can't wait to read the next story.

Rhsc1Rhsc1over 8 years ago
Another

Story to add to my favorites list. Thanks for sharing.

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
I love your stories.

Your stories are SOOOOOOO much better than ones I've purchased on iBooks.

mysteryman196mysteryman196over 8 years ago
Wonderful Story...

Your writing and the stories continues to grow and never stops astounding me. Truly a great story and wonderful characters.

priv8iiipriv8iiiover 8 years ago
Another Great Story

You are an incredible writer! I have loved every story you've written!! Keep up the incredible work!

BobecheBobecheover 8 years ago
Wonderful

Wonderful, absolutely wonderful

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
Nothing new to add.

Simply the need to praise you for yet another terrific story. You're one of the very best on this site. Please, please keep writing.

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
Thank you

Agree with some of the other comments about needing more than a smattering of editing, but a minor distraction given the quality of the tale. Bravo.

It is a real privilege to be able to read your work for free. Thank you.

LBLR15LBLR15over 8 years ago
Another Classic

Thank you so much for sharing this story. The writing is wonderful and the story heart warming. It's like a gift every time I read one.

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
confused

Interpreter, not interruptor.

milena, melina?

RasmatRasmatover 8 years ago
When I was a young man.....

I never dreamed I would ever read a "Romance" story. But, after a year as a Lit member and a big fan of your work , as well as that of a select few other writers, I have to accept that I am what I vehemently denied so many years ago; a "SOFTY".

This is a beautiful story, as your fans have come to expect, perfectly paced, with excellent scene and character development. I would have to reread all of your earlier submissions to be sure but I believe you have outdone yourself with this one.

FIVE STARS. Wish it could be TEN.

I do see an opening for a sequel. Just a thought.

JohnSpiritWolfJohnSpiritWolfover 8 years ago
Another EXCELLENT Story!!!

Thank You Again For Sharing Your Talents With Us DreamCloud...

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
Absolutely wonderful

This is the first time that I have commented on a story. It was wonderful, thoughtful and heart warming. Thank you

Chief3BlanketChief3Blanketover 8 years ago
Wow

This story is right up there with this author's stories titled "The Rehab," and "The Promise." Actually this story might be even better. It is certainly entertaining. With a well written complex plot, and cast of characters.

cliqueggecliqueggeover 8 years ago
superb as always

I always enjoy your writing

thank you and keep up the good work

RPGerRPGerover 8 years ago
To Rampage

But a good cry is sometimes wonderful too!

DC, thank you for once again providing us with a great story. It is now 1 AM on the day after it came out (I check your page daily for new ones) and there were already 32 comments before me. I hope that tells you how many people appreciate your contributions... this one no less than the others.

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
start writing the screenplay

First story in two years to prompt a comment! Think about expanding this story, very well done, lots of room to build out the characters.

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
Simply beautiful

Your story telling is wonderful. I could easily see this made into a movie. What a beautiful love story.

Privates1stClassPrivates1stClassover 8 years ago
"We Met In a Plane Crash..."

or you could have titled it, "Don't Wear Cartoon-Duck Panties." It's a good story--not your best, but better than most. Even saying that, I still gave it five stars.

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
I enjoyed this story a lot ...

and felt like it was close to home, living in Eastern Europe. Armenia is not close to me geographically, but you are there, describing it so well I can feel it while reading. To pick up Armenia of all places... all the girls from there were simply beautiful.

I have to subscribe to your work, period. You know I was browsing through your stories and would just go "yep, he kicked ass here", "wow, that one was superb", "kicked ass here as well...". Was really happy to see this new submission and did not delay reading it, although I had a tough day and feel like sleeping is a must.

Thank you for all the good feels :-)

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
Tell Mikhail

Great story again. The only thingto make it better would be telling Mikhail that he was not responsible for the original crash, to ease the guilt he carries.

BurtschoderBurtschoderover 8 years ago
Another great one

Thank you for continuing to share your writings

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
Captivating Story

Excellent, well constructed story with highly believable characters - I was hooked from the start.

olddave1951olddave1951over 8 years ago
Very captivating story

OK, I'm a sucker for a good tale. Everything was right with this one. Damn it, why not have a happy ending.

Thanks.

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
Ramon or Ramen, which would you rather eat?

Correction for chapter two and three, maybe others:

Ramon - Ramen

it is a pretty unfortunate misspelling, makes me think that some guy named Ramon has been darned unlucky ;-)

Ib_SaysIb_Saysover 8 years ago
Another correction

From page 5 and forward:

interrupter - interpreter

Ib_SaysIb_Saysover 8 years ago

interrupted - interpreted

OldfatanduglyOldfatanduglyover 8 years ago
Great story, deserves better editing

I thoroughly enjoyed the story, but I agree with the other commenters who said that the editing could be better. For example, you repeatedly referred to Azerbaijan as Azerbaijani. The letter "I" on the end of the word changes it from a proper place name to an adjective. It is just like referring to America as American, or England as English, as in "Tomorrow I'm flying to English". The only place it was correct, was where you identified the pilot as Azerbaijani. Still, it was an excellent story.

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
Wonderful story

I gave it 5 stars but I would have given it 10 stars if it were available or 15 if the editing had been better.

oldwayneoldwayneover 8 years ago
I thought it was a really nice love story.

Five Stars from me and very well-deserved. Thanks for the story.

Dragonfire14Dragonfire14over 8 years ago
Superb Story

This is a thoroughly engrossing story especially how two people of different nationalities and cultures joined in such great happiness. Reminds me of John Lennon's song "Imagine" that if people could meet two at a time maybe the hatred in the world would be no more. As for the "editing issue", its the story that moves us and if we are forgiving we easily move through the few mistakes here and there. They do not take away from the context of the story! A beautiful story written in a very poignant way! Superb job and 5 stars for sure! Keep the stories coming.

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
Wow

Another wonderful story, DC always the best....

Keep writing, we are always waiting for your new submission...

dinkymacdinkymacover 8 years ago
Excellent!

Thanks for sharing.

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
thanks for sharing

You could build a novel around this, that I would buy, or just publish a book of your favorite stories, that I would also buy. Keep going, you could be great

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
wow!

I couldn't stop reading.. well done.

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
delightful

much enjoyed ,

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
Very

GOOD WORK!!!

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
whoops

i lost track of the time......this story was very immersive.

loved it, especially how they overcame the language barrier.

definitely 5 stars

darussiandarussianover 8 years ago
Thank you

This is easily the best story I've read on this site. And don't take that lightly, I've read hundreds, certainly everything on the top lists and all their threads. Very few have been great and certainly not as good as this.

Я не могу написать по Армянскому, но может быть по Русски как нибудь пройдёт. Спасибо за отличную книгу и, к сожалению, я только могу дать пять, но серьёзно хочется дать десять звёзд.

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
I am late to work this morning

... but finishing this story was well worth it. Publishable. And a thank you to darussian, below, whose endorsement drew me in.

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
Waiting

Thank you for yet another wonderful story.

I can't wait for the next..

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
I only wish it were longer

THAT my friend is a movie script.

brujaybrujayover 8 years ago
Wonderful Story.................

Great imagery, complete characters.........worth the time to read and enjoy.

Thank you for sharing your stories with us.

Brujay

photolvrphotolvrover 8 years ago
Thank you!

Such a wonderful and beautiful story! One of Literotica's best! I loved the characters, especially Tamara! Please write more stories about them! Ty!

asianToyasianToyover 8 years ago
Outstanding

Loved every word!

asianToy

teedeedubteedeedubover 8 years ago
Agreed

Wonderful story. From every aspect. Thanks for sharing.

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
Exquisite storytelling

Wonderful storytelling, characters, and detail. I have traveled quite a lot in Europe and Asia, a bit like this gentleman herein. Like him, I have often found that people in less modern circumstances often display more humanity and more connectedness to family and community than we Westerners manage in our busy, self-absorbed, and anomic lives. 70% of communication is nonverbal, so they say; but most people will never understand this unless they travel in other countries and attempt to interact and exchange stories with persons who do not share a language with them. Your story does a lovely job of showing how this works, especially when there are two stranded persons depending on each other. I loved the Russian red herring which masked any foreshadowing about his partner's duplicity. Really well conceived and presented. Thanks for your generosity in sharing this wonderful tale with us.

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
Yep, you've done it again.

Thank you for continuing to contribute here. You're one of the very best, and this story lives up to your previous work in every way.

sithonsithonover 8 years ago
5 stars again!

A great story . A nice twist with the murderous partner ,and the

duplicitous ex-girlfriend.

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
Movie rights

If I had the bucks, I would finance this myself. Wonderful story.

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
The best

This was the best story ever shared here. Thank you for sharing your talent!

SouthernSamanthaSouthernSamanthaover 8 years ago

I am truly thankful I somehow discovered this writer. His talent is unbelievable and others may find words to express how fantastic he is but I'm simply overwhelmed by his stories. They touch me in ways I can't describe. I hope someone discovers these stories and make movies or even made for t.v. movies from them. DreamCloud's amazing talent should be shared with the world.

MullendersMullendersover 8 years ago

you wright some mighty fine stories!

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
A very rich srory!

A very rich story with twists and turns and characters to love. Thank you so much for a great read! Mike

mnstk76mnstk76over 8 years ago
Did it again!!

Yet another great story! You never fail to excite the senses with the mystery and intrigue, the twists and turns, and the PASSION!! Thank you for sharing your talents with us...

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
Suspenseful, passionate, and beautiful

This deserves to be a movie

SimonWolfeSimonWolfeover 8 years ago
Definitely movie material

I most definitely agree with a prior comment that this story has the substance and depth to be a successful movie.

DoctimeDoctimeover 8 years ago
New name for DreamCloud

DreamStorm!!

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago

You should start writing novels,the stories are extremely good

MindsMirrorMindsMirrorover 8 years ago
Just Discovered!

The story is excellent! We just discovered you and your story when someone favorited one of ours. This definitely deserves all 5*s (maybe more). We would like to echo the calls for you to go professional. Then you will be getting paid to have critiques of slight grammatical errors. Good luck publishing or give us more.

Thanks for the fantastic read. MM

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago

Man, this is some serious writing!

AnonymousAnonymousover 8 years ago
60,000 Words!

Dream Cloud,

You are an excellent writer! This story has lots of great and creative ideas in it. It is half way to a novel and I believe it could be published as such. I know the BIG push is to self-publish right now, mostly for financial concerns (publishing rights and all...), but if the publisher likes it, and it will!, then your book will be read more widely. It's good enough for me to give it 5 stars +. I have read some of your other works, but this is by far the best! I love that the sex was part of the story and never gratuitous. Very romantic and necessary to drive home the love and excitement they had/have for each other. One last point is that you had "the rest of the story" included in your work. Most authors leave us hanging, but you gave us the whole back-story, mid-story and finishing-story. Really, really well done! First rate and my favorite. B/C I don't have a Log on yet, I couldn't favorite here, but trust me: it is!

Congrats!

Christopher from California, also an author

goatman92goatman92over 8 years ago
Yeesh.

Damn that's a good story. I feel the friend/enemy storyline is unnecessary however. I've read alot of romance novels and stories that seem to hide behind a danger or adventure to propagate story or advance the overly complex plot. Thankfully, it seems you didn't do that. I just felt like the friend/enemy thing is just too out of place. Oh and another thing, I would've liked to know the heroine a bit more. The story is told through the hero's perpective and language barrier prohibits communication I get that but I would've like to know more about the heroine.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 8 years ago
sucker for a romantic story

I really enjoyed this story immensely and I thank you for sharing it. I have discovered that I am a sucker for stories with romance and a happy ending.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 8 years ago
mountain

I love the story

Ed Grocott

SELSTIMSELSTIMabout 8 years ago
Not Disappointed

Which is amazing because with every story of yours I read I figure there is no way he can top that. The only explanation is that you are getting better with every story but I don't know that much about creative writing to be able to point out how. Your stories are so real and vivid they actually evoke the same emotions as if I was really there. I wonder what Doug is doing right now? Thanks again for the wonderful experience.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 8 years ago
Great story but . . . .

As usual a very good story. I was a little disappointed this time though with the number of spelling and grammatical errors. I haven't come across as many in any of your other stories, and I have read quite a few.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 8 years ago
Fantastic

One of the best stories in that genre I have ever read.

Sak77Sak77about 8 years ago
5 stars, favorited, but. . .

I just had a REALLY silly thought. Why didn't your very cool protagonist get himself a speaking electronic English-Armenian translator? LOL Super story. Thank you.

AmbivalenceAmbivalenceabout 8 years ago
Screw Lifetime or Hallmark...

This is Big screen movie quality...

I love the story and the shocks throughout...

His anger over the shoe...

His committing to the fall to ensure her survival...

His anger at his parent's actions...

The violence due to his poor language skills...

His even greater anger at his mother's and Kimberly's deceit...

The surprise of the initial sabotage reveal...

The "how lucky/unlucky can you get" about the second one...

His turning pale when he learned the true target (I picture in the movie the film would have slowed and the sound faded prior to Doug's name so WE wouldn't have heard it)...

Twins...?

And if course, through it all, their love surmounting the language barrier...

Truly amazing...

AnonymousAnonymousabout 8 years ago
6 stars

I don't give 5 stars as "love" to me is something one feels towards wife/spouse/kids or other family-ish relations, not towards concepts/things/stories.

If 6 stars were possible, in my book it would be with the label: "Excellent story, which I will re-read at a later time."

AnonymousAnonymousabout 8 years ago
Sublime

I loved reading this. I rarely visit the romance section because it seems so many stories lend themselves to 'dragging', making what should be moments of frisson into 5 or 6 roadbumps of "oh hey, that was nice I guess". You hit these moments right on the dot and bore a true gem.

RB1947RB1947about 8 years ago
Thank you

for another of your amazing stories. It is 8:25 AM and I never got to bed last night. It's all your fault.

memorable_eventmemorable_eventabout 8 years ago
Amazing story.

I've now read many of your stories and find them intoxicating. Thank you for adding spice to our lives. Definitely should be published as part of a collection of your short stories.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 8 years ago
Amazing

Loved this story. I've read everything you've written and you always amaze.

slamdog1slamdog1about 8 years ago
Other than a few grammatical errors

all I can say is you're a damn fine writer. 5*

AnonymousAnonymousabout 8 years ago
The Pulse of Humanity

Every story I've read by this author, makes us humans worth having a future.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 8 years ago
good one

As always, your story was very good with a nice twist at the end. I enjoyed reading your work. More, please. :)

AnonymousAnonymousabout 8 years ago
Amazing

You can qualify for a novelist this was the first of your story I've read but it's a start

REGARDS DK

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 8 years ago
you are one of the best

From "the rehab" to "the mountain", everything you put up is a masterpiece from a master.

MrmacjrMrmacjralmost 8 years ago
Sequel

I know this is rather lengthy for a story, however there is much more to be discovered about the family and the business. Will Tamara's brother do well with the purchasing,how will the families do with the twins and will the American portion of the business have more love in her life? I think you have more to deliver. Thanks for this portion

roveroneroveronealmost 8 years ago
Another SWEET story, superbly crafted...

I like hot and hard, but also sweet-another great story, engaging characters...love the emotions and twists you weave in

Think this was perhaps fifth story of yours I really loved...glad there are still more to go....

Anonymous
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