by LaRascasse
I couldn't even finish reading it. Keep trying though. I'm just one voice
i was curious how the conflict with catherine would end up, and certainly did not see that coming. creative take on earth day (some might say 'stretch' ;) but planets disappearing with the snap of a goddess's fingers sure does put global warming into perspective, and you captured the spirit of earth day very nicely, which is that Humans Just Don't Fucking Get It).
From the time I started reading, I realized you were writing in the style of a classic greek tragedy. The prince is given the gift of knowledge and wisdom. Eventually ego and greed make him ignore the goddesses warnings. Sadly his people and planet pay the price for disobeying the goddess, and oblivion follows. Thank you for a well constructed tale and an enjoyable read.
The way the setting was introduced was one of the best I've seen, especially for such a non-standard deity mythos. Given the background that was hinted at, I'd be very interested in reading an entire novel from this setting, but the sex scenes where a little unfortunate in their fluidity and audience engagement, ending up as stilted non sequiturs more than anything else. You should definitely remove the purely sex-based theme, expanded the story and fill some of the gaps, then submit it for publishing.
I like this, although I find it hard to believe that the prince got to eighteen without experiencing an orgasm...
I liked this! It's a lovely cross between historical fiction and fantasy. As an earlier commenter said, the sex bits need to flow more in tune with the rest of the story. Plus, there are some places where your word choice or entire sections throw me out of your universe a bit, but nothing a good edit won't solve. But you also have quite a few strokes of genius that kept me reading and the whole concept was so wonderfully thought out. This is the second one I read from you that I really liked. :)