The Super

"Money? Pride? Our daughter. I don't know. My parents warned me about him, but I knew everything when I was 26. He was handsome, had a good job, and I was young and naive. Things were going along pretty well until Kelsey was born," she said nodding toward her daughter. "I gained a lot of weight, I was moody, and let's just say that for a few months, I was never in the mood. So less than a month after I had her, I came home unexpectedly one day and found him in bed with my best friend since junior high school. She'd agreed to watch Kelsey while I went out to have some alone time for the first time in a long while and well...we're obviously no longer friends. In fact, she's now my ex-husband's wife as of the day after our divorce became final."

"Jesus. I'm really sorry, Penny. I feel like a complete ass for the way I talked to you."

"It's okay. It's water under the...sink?" she said laughing at her own joke. "So is that your girlfriend? The cute one I gave the jump to back there?"

"Sarah? No. Not anymore anyway. We dated in high school then broke up just before I went into the Marine Corps and, well, it's kind of a long story. But we're just friends now. Mostly. Okay, some of the time anyway. When we're not arguing."

"You guys sound like a married couple," Penny said smiling. "You're supposed to get along while you're dating then start fighting after the honeymoon. You guys got it all wrong."

Chase laughed and said, "Well, it's not like that. We're strictly roommates until she can get a job and save up enough money to pay for her last semester of college."

"Didn't you tell me you go to school, Chase?"

"Uh, yeah. I'm a freshman at the University of Washington."

"But you were in the military so you're obviously not the typical 19-year old freshman."

"Right. I was on active duty for four years and I'm using the GI Bill and my job as the super to pay my own way through school."

"How long have you been sober? If you don't mind me asking."

"Not at all. I'm hoping to get my one-year chip tonight," he told her.

"Oh! Congratulations. That's a huge milestone." She paused then said, "I just got my my-year chip last month. I went from a social drinker to an alcoholic almost overnight after the um, you know...incident. I got drunk and stayed drunk until I began fearing I'd lose my daughter more than I feared getting sober."

"Sounds very familiar. I had an incident myself that started me on the downhill slide."

"Wanna talk about it?" she asked pleasantly but not in a demanding way.

"Not really. My best friend was killed in the war and I don't like thinking about it, you know?"

"I do. And I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry," she told him. "I try not to think about walking in on them, either. Not that I'm trying to make it equivalent to what you must have seen. But a trigger is a trigger, right?"

They were just a block away when Penny said, "You know...I really was planning on just saying hi to my friends here...but, well, is it okay with you if I attend here tonight? I know you probably can't stand me and if that's a problem, I can just say hi and leave. A meeting is a meeting so..."

"No, no problem. I'd enjoy the company so...please. By all means. And for the record, I can stand you." He smiled then said, "Just barely. But I can stand you."

Penny tilted her head, smiled and told him, "Well, that's high praise after the way I treated you."

Chase was surprised by how many of the old-timers knew Penny. All of them hugged her and told her how good it was to see her and asked how she was doing. She gave them the short version of the events and they all told her how sorry they were to hear she'd lost her house, but how thrilled they were she had Kelsey and was still sober.

Chase did indeed get his one-year chip and as they were having a cup of coffee some cookies afterward Penny made her way over to him and said, "I really am proud of you, Chase. That's a big deal. Do you struggle with it every day?"

"Yes and no. I'm good until the afternoon and then I start thinking about it. The evenings are the worst. From after dinner until I go to bed. You?"

"For me, the mornings are the worst. Once I started drinking first thing after waking up, that initial hit of alcohol was the most wonderful feeling I'd ever felt. It was even better than sex." She smiled back when her comment made him laugh. "I spent the rest of the day chasing it until I was too drunk to care or until I passed out." She looked down at her coffee cup and said, "That's why I nearly lost custody of Kelsey. One day, I passed out and I must have been out for hours. My ex had a key to the house and he'd been calling me over and over. When I didn't answer, he came over and found me. He called the police and they called social services and..."

He saw her eyes well up with tears and reached out and put his hand on her forearm. "It's okay. You don't have to talk about it. All that matters is you've still got her, right?"

She blinked away her tears and smiled at him. "Right. That's absolutely right. If I'd lost her, Chase..."

He saw another tear fall before he took her coffee cup, set it down next to his and just kind of awkwardly hugged her. "It's okay, Penny. You didn't lose her. And I can tell you're a good mom."

"Thank you," she said. She'd put her arms around him and rested her head on his shoulder.

"She's a cutie pie, by the way. I love kids. They're so innocent and trusting."

Penny leaned back and told him, "That's so true. The innocent and trusting part. Well, okay, the cutie pie part, too."

She was looking up into Chase's eyes for the first time and it made him feel something he hadn't felt since...high school? With Sarah. He smiled at her and said, "She takes after her mom."

Penny laughed and said, "Ha! If you weren't so young... No wait. If I wasn't so old...

Chase slowly lowered his arms and said, "You're hardly...old. You can't even be 30." He honestly couldn't tell and now that he didn't see her as psycho bitch, he thought 35 was very uncharitable. She really only looked a few years older than Sarah so even 30 seemed a bit on the high side."

Penny rolled her eyes and said, "I wish I was 30 again. I'm almost 32 so yeah, I am...old."

Chase laughed and said, "That's hardly old." He looked at his watch then said, "Then again, it is almost 8 o'clock. Don't people your age go to bed really early?"

Penny gave him 'the eye' and played along. "Oh, yeah. But that's only so we can get up at 4am and go have breakfast at Dennys." She picked her coffee cup and turned toward another group of people. As she walked away, she looked over her shoulder and smiled and said, "Smart ass!"

Chase smiled back and mouthed the words, "Who? Me?" pointing at himself. She just flipped her head and pretended to ignore him.

Ten minutes later they were on their to pick up Kelsey and head home. "I wonder how many crazy tenants have called me while I was out," he said without thinking.

"Crazy? Like...me?" she said cutting her eyes at him.

"No, not like you," he said. "Okay, before today I'd have had you in mind as the poster child for crazy tenant, but..." He looked over at her and said, "But you're not all that bad." She cut her eyes over at him as he added, "You know, for an old person."

She took one hand off the wheel and hit him on the shoulder. "Hey! Violence is never the answer," Chase said holding up his arms in self defense.

"Don't mess with Granny," she warned making a fist.

"Granny Penny. That's got kind of a nice ring to it, doesn't it?" Chase said. He threw his hands back up reflexively as soon as he saw the tiny fist headed his way.

"You're lucky I'm driving, mister," she told him.

"Yeah. A woman driver. Lucky me." He ducked a third time and both of them laughed just as they were getting ready to pull in to her mom's apartment building. Several minutes later, Kelsey was buckled into her carseat in the back behind Chase.

It was dark when they got back to their own apartment complex. "Let me walk you guys to your door," Chase offered.

"That's okay. We'll be fine," Penny assured him.

"All the same, I'd feel better knowing you were safe."

"Well, okay. That would be nice." Kelsey had fallen asleep on the way and since she was on his side, Chase offered to get her. He unbuckled her seat belt and scooped her up out of her seat. He kicked the door shut and let Kelsey rest her head on his shoulder.

"Okay. Lead the way," he said to Penny.

When they got upstairs she thanked him for walking them and he thanked her for the ride. "Here. I'll take her," Penny said.

"That's okay. I've got her. Besides, we might wake her up. I'll carry her in for you."

Penny unlocked the door, flipped on the light, and showed Chase to Kelsey's room. She pulled down the covers then pulled off her daughter's shoes and socks. "Just lay her down like that. I'll bathe her in the morning."

Chase gently laid her in the bed then pulled the blankets up around her neck. Penny kissed her daughter good night then shut off the light as they walked out.

"Well, thank you again, Chase Edwards. I'd invite you to have a glass of wine, but..."

Both of them laughed before Penny said, "Sorry. That's not something to even joke about. But I do have coffee, tea, and maybe even some orange juice."

"Oh, no thank you, Penny. I've gotta go check messages and then do some reading and Sarah will probably be all pissed off about... Oops. Sorry. I meant to say she'll be upset."

Penny laughed and told him, "Kelsey's asleep, Chase. It's okay. I've heard the word a time or two before." She saw him smile and before he could say a word she put up a finger and said, "Not one word about how long ago that must have been, though."

He threw his hands up and said, "Oh, no. I learned my lesson on the way back. Note to self: don't mess with Granny Penny."

"Fast learner. I like that," she said with a smile.

And it was a really fabulous smile. So much so that Chase said without even thinking, "You have a really beautiful smile, Penny."

He saw her smile fade and her facial expression change. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean...all I was saying was..."

"No, it's okay, Chase. You just kind of caught me off guard." She smiled again and said, "So...it was very nice spending time with you. I'm glad we had the chance to learn a little bit about each other. And congratulations one your one-year chip."

Chase smiled back and said, "Me, too. I really enjoyed your company tonight, Penny."

"Same here. This was...nice," she told him.

Both of them looked at one another uncomfortably before Chase finally said, "So, um...I guess I'll be going. You take care, okay?"

As she walked him to the door she told him she would and for him to do the same. As she was closing the door, Chase turned around and said, "I was just wondering if you know, you might wanna um...you know, go to another meeting or whatever sometime."

Penny's eyes were suddenly bright and in spite of her subdued tone, Chase could tell there was kind of new...connection. "Well, I mean...I guess since we're both going to meetings and since I pretty much know everyone at the 6th Avenue location, I suppose it makes sense to do that. You know, saving gas and what not. So yeah, that sounds good. Maybe you can drive this time, though, okay?"

"I can't," he told directly without sounding rude.

"Oh, okay. Well, no problem. I just thought maybe..."

"I lost my license for a year. I'm lucky I'm not in jail."

"Let me guess. You were drinking?"

Chase nodded. "It was really serious, Penny. I almost killed someone and Sarah got banged up pretty bad, too. So I can't drive. At least not until my one-year suspension is up next month. If that makes you feel any differently, I completely understand."

"That makes your twelve months of sobriety all the more impressive, Chase. And no, it doesn't change my opinion at all. I mean, look what I did with my own daughter." She looked him in a way that said she really did understand. "I'd be happy to drive. So...tomorrow?"

"Yeah. Yeah, that sounds great. Good-night, Penny."

"Good night, Chase." She closed the door and leaned her back up against it, her heart pounding in her chest. "What are you thinking, Penny?" she said quietly but out loud. "You're obviously not thinking. He's wrong for you on every level. You have a child, he's too young, he doesn't have a career, he's an alcoholic, he's in college, and...but...my God! He is...so good looking."

Chase only had two classes the next day and there was something he really wanted to do. He took the bus straight home then called the owner of the apartment complex. "You wanna do what? That old thing? Hell, I bought new chains and swings and even Quickrete for the last super but he quit before...You'll do it? Hell, yeah. Go ahead. Just make sure it's really securely anchored, okay?"

Just as he was finishing, Penny pulled up. She and Kelsey got out and as soon as she saw it, she starting screaming. "Mommy, mommy! Look! It's a swing! Can I play on it? Pleeease?"

"Well, we need to ask first, sweetheart," he heard her say as they got closer. "Chase? What's all this?"

"Oh, it was sitting in the basement and well, someone kind of inspired me to set it up," he said looking down at Kelsey.

"Can I mommy?" she asked again pulling on her coat.

"Is it okay?" she asked Chase.

"The concrete isn't quite dry, but as long she doesn't go too high right now, it should be okay."

After just a couple of minutes of gentle swinging Penny said, "Okay, Kelsey, we have to get dinner before mommy takes you to see Nanna."

"But I wanna swing!" she said kicking her feet.

"Honey, we have to..."

"I'll push her for a while longer then walk her upstairs. If that's okay," Chase told her.

"Are you sure you don't mind? You don't have to do that, Chase."

"I don't mind. I want to."

He gave Kelsey a small push and she hollered out, "Wee!"

"It wouldn't make much sense to put it up for her then not let her play on it, right?" he said giving her another little push.

"Well, then I guess that'll be fine. But just 15 minutes, okay?" she said to her daughter.

When their time was up, Chase asked Kelsey if he could hold her hand on the way upstairs. "I'm a big girl and I can go up the stairs all by myself!" she told him as she ran ahead of him.

"Okay, just be careful!" he told her. He smiled as he saw her stop at each stair, regain her balance then step up again. "Wow! You really are a big girl."

"See, I told you so!" she said as she got to the second floor and took off running to her apartment. She couldn't quite reach the handle and waited for Chase to open it. As he did, she ran inside hollering, "I wanna play with Chase every day!"

She found her mom and hugged her legs. "Well, Chase is very busy, honey, so we'll have to see about that. Did you tell him thank you for playing with you today?"

"I forgot." She spun around and ran to Chase and hugged his legs. "Thank you for playing with me Chase. Your my best friend and I love you SO much!"

Chase put his hand on the top of her head then knelt down and looked her in the eye. "You're very welcome Miss Kelsey. And I love you, too. We'll do this again real soon, I promise."

Chase couldn't remember the last time he'd smiled like that or the last time he'd even felt like that. Last night and now this. He looked up just in time to see Penny wiping away a tear she obviously didn't want him to see and he pretended it wasn't there. "So I'll stop by in an hour, okay?" she told him.

"I'll be ready," he told her. "See you, new best friend!" he said to Kelsey who gave his legs another big hug.

Right on time, Penny rang the doorbell with Kelsey in tow. Sarah answered the door and said, "Oh, you're the lady who gave me the jump. Thank you again."

"No problem," she said. "Is Chase here?"

Sarah stood there for a minute and then realized she recognized the voice from all the messages left on the machine. "Do you live upstairs by any chance?" she asked.

"Yes, we do. Why do you ask?"

"Oh, no reason." Sarah heard Chase finishing up in the bathroom and went to get him. "Um...psycho bitch is here," she said quietly as she stuck her inside. "You know, the woman who jumped my car. Why didn't you tell me that was her?"

"She's not a psycho or a bitch, Sarah. She's actually a very nice person. And she's been through hell recently with a divorce and her own recovery."

"Oh, okay. I see. It also doesn't hurt that she's really pretty either, doesn't it? Now this is all starting to make sense."

"It's not like that," he said as he finished brushing his thick, dark hair. "We're just friends. We go to AA. She's got a cute kid. That's it."

"Right and I've got a bridge to sell you—cheap."

Penny barely said a word on the way there or on the way home that evening after their meeting. Chase finally said, "You're kind of quiet tonight. Everything okay?"

"Yeah, I think so," she told him. "I guess I'm just a little confused, that's all. I'm fine, though. Really."

"Confused? About what?"

"I don't know. It's...complicated."

"I'm a good listener. Well, if you want to talk."

Penny didn't say anything for a couple more blocks then without looking at him said, "It's just that I only recently got out of a bad marriage, and I've got to put Kelsey first, and I really need a better job, and now someone's kind of come into my life, and...I'm just a little confused."

"Oh. I see," Chase replied. "Well, he's a lucky guy. Is it getting serious or something?"

"It's the 'or something' part. I don't think he even knows how I feel yet and I'm not sure I want him to."

"I guess that makes sense with you just getting divorced and everything. You probably need some time to think things through and figure out what you want to do. Is he someone you work with?" he asked looking over at her.

"Oh, um...no. We don't work together. I really just met him and anyway the whole thing is kind of crazy. It...it'd never work out. There are just too many differences and like I said, I don't want to rush into anything. It's just that I feel like there's a connection or something."

Chase felt like he'd been kicked in the balls. "That's pretty amazing. I was kind of feeling the same way about someone I recently met, too. But like you say, I just don't see it working out. Anyway, I'm sure you'll make the right decision and do what's best for you and Kelsey. She's really great, by the way. I had a lot of fun playing with her on the swings after you left."

"So did she," Penny told him. "She talked about you all through dinner. Chase this and Chase that and Chase is my best friend." She finally looked over at him and smiled. "You made quite an impression on her."

"Yeah, well, she kind of did the same thing with me. I can't remember the last time I enjoyed something that much. Just pushing a kid on a swing. It was the most fun I've had in a really long time, you know?"

She smiled again and said, "Yes I do." She didn't say anything for another minute or so then told Chase, "I guess I'm mostly worried about Kelsey getting hurt."

"On the swing set? Oh, no. It's really anchored in good."

Penny laughed softly. "No, not on the swings. I mean hurt by this guy I was referring to. I wouldn't want her to get attached to him and then, you know..."

"Oh, right. I gotcha. Yeah, that could be hard for her to understand."

They were pulling into the parking garage to get Kelsey when Chase said, "I like talking to you, Penny. You're pretty great. Just in case you didn't know that."

"Lately, I'd have to say I don't know that, so it's nice to hear. Especially coming from you, Chase. And I appreciate you letting me ramble on like that."

"Ramble on? Not at all. That was obviously very important to you and I'm glad you trusted me enough to tell me about it. I guess maybe I really am a little bit jealous of this guy. Whoever he is." He smiled at her again just before she got out of the car and she looked away as though his smile was somehow painful for her to look at.