All Comments on 'Thinking Man’s Action 02'

One logical error - He asks ileana why she mocks amy's weight (at the hospital).

They both were instrumental in making amy assume that she was getting fatter and his apparent surprise at the fatty comments makes no sense.

that was horrible. I don't write because i don't think i would be good at it you are about my level so take a hint.

Your older stories are leaps and bounds better. Plus he seemed rather passive in the divorce considering all this talk of action.

This story has same end as FrancisMacomber's gem story "The Six O'clock News Slot " and EXP5***** . Hyper Super Outstanding Modern Figaro Type, Cruel and Super Romantic 1/3+1/3+1/3 MIXED REVENGE STORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

BTW I lost minutes from Battlestar Galactica episode....................

Why else use that instead of his real handle. The story won't win any awards, but is still a pretty decent story and i enjoyed it.

In a way, his "passive" noble character makes him a master of his fate. I had a hard time not laughing through this one, and the theme was good. Well written and fun.

The madcap pace from part 1 started right back up with the foray into the wild dog den. It continued with the hospital face-off between Amy & Illeana. Then the tension and supense started to leak from the story with Amy's departure and the introduction of mundane details of divorce legalities and loneliness of born again bachelorhood.

There was cognitive dissonance with the narrator confessing to missing Amy in spite of her philandering. Before he was trying to ignore her and muddle thru life and its multitudinous demands . No longer living with a cheater & liar would seem to be a wash at least, but he missed her ??

Deadeye Jane seemed to roar out of nowhere to become his wife. The narrator's main rapport had been with Illeana, so this was jarring. Finally the closure scene with Amy went down like flat, warm soda void of carbonation. Overly sweet with no life.

Amy had become aware of the scope of her transgressions. This was' nice'in terms of the character's capacity for self knowledge and potential improvement. In terms of comedic purposes cpete shot himself in the foot. Comedy isn't about being even handed.

In 'Ugly American' , ' Death do Us Part ', ' Blood From a Turnip' the villianesses remained defiant in their transgressions despite the consequences . This gave the protagonists one last chance in the farce to hilariously state their case & take a bow as the curtain fell.

Amy's explanation and enightenment was mundane to listen to.

Every sinner has a sob story as to how they lost their way. This one was nothing special. 'Special' is cpete's median standard and in this one conclusion, he fell short. I can't five star this read and won't vote because I don't want to drag down the average score.

I respect the ambition and plethora of issues this story comedically took on. This story was in no way a failure but it just doesn't quite measure up to cpete's best social/ marital satires.

Actors say dying is easy, it's comedy that's hard. cpete is one of the few authors willing to use this double edged sword in the volatile genre of Loving Wives. The plethora of hot rating fireballs throughly pockmarking his resume of stories vouch for the facr, that it doesn't pay to bet against his next effort's worthiness.

outstanding story thanks for your effort

When a bunch of anon injured me half year ago and I woved I would not go to the States. However I will buy 3 air tickets and I would fly to the States and I would kick you and StangStar06 on your asses for thinking yourself to be not good writers!!!!!!!

Well done and fun to read. Everyones happy......Thanks

@ john1946 Is everybody happy???!!!! Amy suffers to her death from a unhealing illnes,which origined from the revenge THE 1/3 CRUEL REVENGE PART OF THE STORY. She must see her former husband happinest almost forever THE 1/3 ROMANTIC REVENGE PART OF THE STORY. Both origines from an 1/3 excellent MODERN FIGARO TYPE REVENGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Unusual, and entertaining, both chapters #1 and #2. (Interesting use of metaphors, also.) There are some writing flaws; you need a better editor. But given the stroryline, that element is forgiven. This is a fascinating plot, and one which many writers would be unable to pull off.

Bill is the kind of man you would welcome to be your neighbor and want in a foxhole with you.

He was written a decent man that when either faced with trouble, or seeing trouble, did not just stand by watching (Junping on the jocks back and into a dog pit).

Fun tale 5*****

the frequent odd mistakes made reading the story a challenge at times. The judge part was not believable since she would be looking for a job after rewarding a friend while performing her judicial duties. The beginning was set up quite well, but the story became a bit frantic and unfocused in this chapter. I will read anything and everything you post. I did enjoy the story.

Like HDK wrote the only VERY SMALL mistake the meeting with judge (grandmother). It would have been better Author dramaturgy an accidental encounter meeting with the grandmother (judge) on a honor lunch at the Acme' company's owner. Cpete could write a humorouse twist meeting and she could have told about the love of the grandparents there. So there was a good twist with the one eyed veteran girl. Against this very, very, very small dramaturgy mistake the story deserves EXP5*****!

First, everyone acts the way Jon Lovitz did as the Master Thespian. So badly overwritten.

Second, I didn't care for Bil,l. Now, Bill is okay, but not Bil,l. Check for yourself; it's spelled that way at least twice.

Third, 'than' is not the same as 'then'. Three times that I noticed.

Those are just some examples.

I know, I know, cries of 'Grammar Nazi' are cranking up. But, as someone noted, your earlier works were better. This is like slash-and-burn, drive-by writing.

Needs a better editing job.

The anoxeria bit was over the top and the lady judge unbelievable, but 85% was great. TU and please post many more.

Very entertaining.

BTW, anonymous I wasn't thinking "'Grammar Nazi'" I was thinking: "troll."

Another good story....no wimps, good characterization and a happy ending. Thanks

the judge though unreal was funny because he had been saying that saving the kid ruined his life,and that ended up making his day.

The only real problem is with.I can buy Amy going into a rage at him like that,often cheaters to deflect their guilt would do that,but to run away like that would make no sense,sge either would want to get in his face or would prob realize she had screwed up and want to reconcile.....as portrayed she wasn't an evil bitch looking for an excuse to screw him,she was messed up and that doesn't work.Then when they

meet she basically blames him and never really apologizes to him,she acknowledges she screwed up but then she can't seem to understand how much pain she caused him. I kind of agree with others, she might have been better as the deluded bitch brushibg off what she did and blaming Bill with all kinds of ludicrous pomposity or had her really open up and take the blame and apologize and realize that bill hurt hrr because he was so hurt by her,that her thoughtlessness destroyed both of them and in the end the answer is in the mirror.Bill ends up doing the decent thing for her which was good,but the wrapup needed a better closure.

Very creative and interesting plot. Happy ending. Lots of twists and turns, for example I didn't see the judge coming.

This chapter makes up for the way the first chapter ended.

A very enjoyable read, thanks

keeps his values and changes the world a lot better, TK U MLJ LV NV

Extremely well written. It's an exceptional type of man who let's a divorce go through without bringing up his wife's infidelity. In the end everyone is happy, especially the wounded hero and husband of a new loving and caring wife. Well done.

1,967,101 Stars

but lots of fun, and a lively read. Thank you. Dead-eye Jane suddenly appears and claims the prize; perhaps she should have been given more background info.

Overall the editing is better than average for this site. Here are examples of problems due to mere carelessness:

We are you first, last and only call

"Bil,l that is one pissed off lady."

"Bill, l are you saying you would be open to marriage counseling?

A well-dressed guy about my age, with an older distinguished gentleman walked into the room.

But the following could be indicative of the editor's depth of grammatical knowledge:

The Detective looked around at Amy, Ileana and I once more,

They have better medical care than you or me.

I was scared shitless, he must have been terrified.

and similarly:

I lay back in my bed and smiled, the pain meds did their work and Ileana tromped out of the room.

Overall a good tale. For me, the story fell apart a bit in the middle but came together nicely in the end. Thanks.

Having the opportunity for balance and joy in life can soften feelings against another.

Things work out every now and then too.

I enjoyed part 1 and was glad part 2 came quickly. I usually try to figure out twists and direction as I read but the story flowed so well that I wasn't really guessing ahead. Not much else to say but good job and patiently wait on the next one.

As usual, I loved every word. I really think that except for the totally classic "Too Ugly to Die" story, this is your best. You are also without a doubt the funniest or perhaps funnest of the LW crowd. I gave you a pair of 5's (one from me and one from Kat) may I please have my editor back now?

Anyone who think most judges do not treat their courtrooms like personal fiefdoms, consider everyone as serfs and believe they are the rule of law need to talk to any bailiff, stenographer or spend some time in a courtroom. Ask any trial lawyer about “judge shopping”, or how about the recent case where the judge was sending all youthful offenders, no matter what their offense, to his buddies for-profit “boot” detention camp.

The courtroom “work group” is the oldest most protected fraternity in the country. Woe to anyone who dares challenge it (think Anita Hill)

Now I have to go back and give part 1 five stars. I thought it would be worth the stars, but one should always, "Act like a man of thinking", before you take action.

He turns out to be a big media hero, and his judge magically turns out to be the grandmother of the child he saved, and converts from Nazi Feminist to do him the same good deed in complete contradiction of her entire career as a judge? Yeah, nobody would notice that connection and get her crooked ass removed from her seat and thrown in jail due to the obvious and extreme conflict of interest.

I like to see the victim husband win as anybody, but this is one of those plot twists that isn't winning the lottery, not just suspending disbelief, but breaking it into tiny little pieces. Why not just make the judge a member of the mafia who not only divorces him on his own terms, but hands him a billion dollar judgement and has his wife publicly bumped off? It would make about as much sense.

This should have been five stars, because it's a good standard story, with a great female heroine (Ileana is awesome), but the idiotic plot twist badly damaged a story that I really wanted to love. Four stars. Great story, but try to keep some perspective on the suspension of disbelief factor in the future.

You have to be one of the best writers on this site. Your stories have humor and an actual plot. What some people need to realize is this is fiction. It only has to make sense in the writer's mind. It doesn't have to be real... just like Rambo isn't real. Pure fun, but not real. Keep up the great work.

Myhands316

cpete does do some fairly BTB leaning work - I suppose one should not be surprised at another one.

Giving your ex a life threatening disease for cheating on you is a bit much. Yes, people die from eating disorders - and the severity of the one being describe is life threatening.

The Fem-Nazi line (I thought it was FemiNazi, by the way) is pure Rush Limbaugh.

Equally blue-state political is the salvation-by-befriending-the-wealthy and veterans-as-superior-workers-and-human-beings. Not that veterans are to be dishonored... but are you really better than the rest of us?

At the end of the day, the lack/late development of Amy's motivation speaks to a male wish fullfillment fantasy, the gay female friend was good (kind of a wild trickster character - difficult to carry off) but was more veteran than female, leading to a lack of empathy to the female side of the equation. The eventual wife, for example, almost fades into the wallpaper. As far as a story goes, I've read much worse... the story mechanics went fairly well, the evolution of the protagonist was significant. The story beats a horse the author wanted beaten - I'm not sure that is the best mode of storytelling.

Green-something

A person enjoys while reading, but when he's finished and has time to think about it says, "Now wait a minute."

To each his own; I do enjoy your writing and have fun with the stories but I'm more of a realist I guess.

The perfect chance to yell "Geronimo" and you blow it. :-)

Now we get T-shirts that say "I'm to stupid to die"?

Well, great story enjoyed it.

(Sorry no disrespect meant, but all kids of a certain vintage yelled it whenever they jumped off of anything.)

As a vet myself, I loved the military humor! And political humor.

Nice to see someone recognize vets and their can do attitude. Not to mention calling attention to the many amputations and disfigurements common to today's vets returning from the "Sandbox". Regardless of the merits of the story to the literary minded, Kudos to you for describing the vets the way you did.

My main quibble to this very effective revenge tale is that I mistrust coincidences! That means having the Judge also be the Gramma is kinda 'deus ex machina' !

I mean, the author used up a LOT of 'suspension of disbelief' with I-Lean-A and her Magic Leg!

Well done. Thanks for writing it.

Thanks for the "fitting ending". As the famous saying goes; "Once a cheater, always a cheater". Stupid fat-ass cheating slut got what she deserved and more!

This had originality, it read smoothly, and there was a bit of humor. I agree with others that Jane should have been developed as a character in the story prior to the sex scene. Thanks for writing.

I thoroughly enjoyed reading your story.

Thank you

as others have said - just a few too many 'coincidences' to keep it lodged in the real world. Having said that, I read a lot of Charles Dickens in my youth - and he almost made 'coincidences' an art form! So, all in all, a very enjoyable story.

Hands down GREAT STORY, but the turnip series always will be my favorite

This reads like some of SS06's earlier, whimsical stories. Could your editor have something to do with that? I appreciated the confrontation at the end. I don't really buy it (in the real world), but it is as good a reason as any in fantasy land. I thought Amy's blow-up and initiation of divorce was a surprise. But, hubby had, through psychological warfare, really screwed with her head, so irrational behavior shouldn't be too unexpected. I enjoyed the light humor and clever quips, but I would have liked to have seen it scaled back a bit, during the heavier scenes. I'm all for the occasional use of gallows humor, but it was a little much. The Skeletor reference was almost distractingly annoying to me (plus very mean-spirited considering Dead Eye didn't know it was Amy). I was a little disappointed that the story didn't have more drama-I would have expected hubby to have more angst over losing his only girl since he was 16. Still, a fun little tale of cheating, divorce, and moving on.

I have to say Cpete stories are always a treat and bring out the best comments. The Blood from a Turnip stories had over 165+ comments. Now that is story telling.

Keep up the good work

I enjoyed it very much!

Brutal

need to get a life.

Go correct your grade school students, let us adult readers enjoy the story.

I laughed so hard thru part of this ......

Awesome!!!

Thx

and collaboration on projects, brings some closer together, TK U MLJ LV NV

Enjoyable read

HDK was right; your second chapter was sort of free range, and no judge would go the route the Femi-Nazi went. However, it's only a story, and I still loved it.

I read both parts, and just absolutely loved them. I loved the ending. Boy did I get it wrong...I really thought Ilena was going to be his wife.

... but, overall, this was an outstanding story. Well worth 5 stars.

Personally I would have told Amy, in the restaurant that she was the biggest thing that I had ever seen, and I`ve been on safari!

What utter crap to blame her ex for her being a gutter slut! "It`s all your fault, because you weren`t there!" Bullshit! They were never together because she CHOSE to switch shifts and quit school. She CHOSE to not talk to her husband and tell him she was lonely. She CHOSE to become the town bike. None of which her husband had any input in.

As for her anorexia? Tough shit! Again, not hubby`s fault. She CHOSE not to eat! He never deprived her of food! As the old saying goes; " I`m responsible for MY feelings, not yours! Your feelings are YOUR problem!" So, feel fat? Your problem! Don`t blame your insecurities on me! Easily offended? Good, you deserve to be offended then! It`s not MY problem what you do and don`t take offence to. I`m not your mother. It`s not my responsibility to hold your hand all your life! Grow up, and stop blaming everyone else for your shit!

Yes overall a great story. the only thing that erked was why be so nice to the cheating cunt of an ex wife. Personally i would have let her skinny boned anorexic arse rot. Fuck, if she wanted to starve herself to death i would be only too happy to let her. Still I loved one eye jane when she said that she was still more than capable of capping the skinny bitch. My kind of woman. God i'd even pay for her ammo and make it match grade at that.keep on writing please.

A.P. England

and does nothing.

What happened to the prosthetic leg?

Why was the infidelity not even mentioned in the divorce?

Other than her new job at the bakery, what happened to Ileana?

The ending left too many holes in the story.

Marvelous......Thank you. I am reassured at stories like this. I enjoy the entire full circle challenges and results. HOORAY. Fine wordsmithing.

thanks,

Loved it. Five stars.

Miko needs to learn the difference between "then" and "than" plus some other things.

Your story left me with the 'Feel Good Factor' - thanks for that !!

why so many other writers on this site acknowledge cpete as an inspiration and mentor, so to speak. Writing is just great, insightful and fun. I thought it was hilarious when the guys infection came from the toddler and not the wild dogs.

Kids bite. When they are scared, excited or just tired.

Well told. But unlike 007 with Pussy Galore, Bill was not anle to convince Ileana to "join his team." (grin)

Thanks for the good story and positive conclusion!

...but I did enjoy that story - well done cpete !!

Something entirely different,it was.

...and I had some good laughs - thanks a bunch.

Yes, this was one fantastic story. I liked how you incorporated the Vets into the story. Job well done. Thanks for a very original and entertaining story.

I loved this story. Thanks for writing it. All btb stories should be this good.

Can't believe I missed this story until found it under cpete site. Pays to look at your favorite authors from time to time.

Thank you for sharing. Please keep writing and I will keep reading.

the vets still help and try to do better. TK U MLJ LV NV

on this site. So every once in a while I have to go back and read some of the oldies but goodies. This one was good, but I would really feel sad for someone in this situation without the friends that he had. And yes, I agree that he should have played mind games with the bitch. She betrayed him on so many levels that maybe death would have been the only way to even things up. But screwing with her head was the next best thing and perfectly legal.

As usual, the oldies are the best. No wimps or cucks here.

Wonder if he got the kids a dog? 😇

Very enjoyable, tongue-in-cheek, story but the comment about Behaviorists isn't exactly accurate. It's that kind of Dogma that gives Behaviorism a bad name. Actually, ones behavior is a product of their environment but that is just an explanation for their behavior not an excuse. Everyone, unfortunately, is responsible for their own behavior, even if you were raised to be a sociopath. No child has any control over the way they were raised and there are some pretty sick parents out there and don't even know it. I loved all your clichés and the dog puns in the comment section were clever. Thank you for the entertainment.

Let's see, she IS cheating, just because she's bored!

She BELIEVES he's cheating, simply because she finds a LESBIAN'S hair in their bathroom, and she goes for a scorched Earth divorce, and we're supposed to feel sympathy for her when it all blows up in her face?

Sorry, she got just what she deserved!

The ending was not quite as good as the first chapter. While he brings up the issue of her doing things with her hookups that she never did with him, she never addresses it. I'm bored, was not a satisfactory response. This was not a believable marriage.

that hiring vets isn't good business IT IS GREAT BUSINESS, TK U MLJ LV NV

Your latest reminded me of this story.

You have a thing for amputees. Whomever it is, I wish them well.

The Judge was personally involved because he'd saved her grandson and she made a judgement call that was totally out of character with all her previous cases. If anyone puts two and two together, she'd be disbarred, disgraced and her judgement award in his favor would be set aside.

You are right about most Veterans being people of action, doing a good job doing it to completion and doing it well and some of the best quotes.

" When time comes I want to good like my grand dad. He was in peace not like the other passenger in the car with him"

"Be a thinking man and act like a thinking man"

I like your use of words and your ideas, keep up the great writing.

A very unique tale. Thanks.

Seeing you state at the beginning that any errors are your fault; allow me to point out a few especially the first :- you need to get your facts correct when dealing with Armed Forces stories, what the hell is a " motor round ", guess you mean mortar bomb (motor round is what Brits often call driving a car), second, you continually use "then " when it should be "than" & vice versa. I'm constantly amazed at the number of authors who just do not seem to know how to use these 2 words properly & of course also those other perennial mix up favourites; your, you're, there, their & they're. Still, a good read. 4 ****

Thank God you didn't make the lesbian turn straight. Hi always laugh my ass off at this in other stories.

I still can't get over how much I enjoy this story. It has all the best things in life. Dogs, kids and a bakery. What more could you want? Also a conniving, cheating wife gets taken down like the scum that she is. I actually got the inspiration for this comment from the subsequent comments since my last reading. (is that redundant?) Anyway for those who thought that he was a meanie to his poor little lonely wife I gotta say, get real. She did not just do what she did for something to do. She systematically set out to destroy her husband one little slight and indiscretion at a time. All the while keeping this from him because he just really didn't matter any more. Cpete invented the perfect dysfunctional spouse and turned her loose. Such a great job of writing. I'll check back in a year or so and see what's new. So, to the one's who don't believe a judge would act like that, even though they generally do what the want to do until censored, I say buck up little campers, it's just a story and Pete gets to write his characters the way he wants to. Hooty-hoo.

It's been a while since you were on but your stories are still classics. Thank you cpete wherever you are.

...and it's still a great read - Nice one,cpete !!

I just realized that all your "heroes" are inept assholes who rely on miraculous circumstances and benevolent god-figures to bail them out of the mess that they've put themselves into because of their own stupidity.

She got bored and lonely because they were no longer together 24/7?

She was the one to choose to go on day shift while he stayed on nights.

Most businesses pay extra for night shift workers because it is harder to find them, so it would not be the bakery moving her.

The bakery owner liked them, he would have kept them both together to help them.

Unless she asked for day shift.

Really, really good story.

Aside from your obviously liberal asinine aversion to guns for self protection and a bit of disrespect for veterans, this was a pretty good story. Fortunately your disrespect was pretty mild, knowing your political bent, it made it a little comical.

Had some nice elements to it. Mind game subtle revenge was cool. A man actually getting justice in divorce was a welcome change.

Pretty good story. An easy 4

I expected it to be Ileana. The author was a bit too coy.

The problem is that Ileana is the only female actually fleshed out and I came to like her, there need to be at least a few interactions beforehand to make the reader care about Jane

You may be right, but only if someone who knows complains!

Remember, the Judge uses her maiden name, Amy probably doesn't have the kind of high-powered attorney that can hire investigators to look into things.

Like Ib_Says wrote, Jane wasn't fleshed out enough as a character to let us care about her -- until you dropped her on us at the end.

Love the story (both parts), thanks!

Same as always, wife cheats, hubby gets revenge, wife loses everything, hubby gets new hot wife and lives happily ever after, ex-wife’s life turns to crap. Totally unrealistic. But there are hundreds of the same on this site. None where the same happens to husband when he cheats.

This is my second read and I still enjoy the humor and stranger-than-fiction scenarios, maybe more than the first time. Loved it and thanks for sharing your work!

Terrific story! All Praise From Me For The Brave Military!!!!!!!

You definitely have My Endorsement! ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ WOOF!

This is a clever little tale of a cheating wife, off-beat revenge and a bewildered man being rewarded for doing the right thing. Zola would have hated it - I enjoyed it. The story moves along at a good pace, the characters are endearing and the dialogue is snappy and often witty. The story may be closer to a modern fairy tale than real life but it stays faithful to it's own logical parametres. One to savour.

LA

I always enjoyed this story. Ex Viet Nam, Desert Storm Vet.

Enjoyed it thoroughly.

Good plot. Good characters. Well done.

Thoroughly enjoyable tale, with excellent characters, 5*.

"None where the same happens to husband when he cheats."

Because this is the loving wives category... all about married women having extra-marital affairs. There is no category specifically for cheating husbands.

"hubby gets new hot wife and lives happily ever after, ex-wife’s life turns to crap. Totally unrealistic."

Sorry, but that's just not true at all. The old adage about men ageing like wine and women ageing like cheese is very accurate. At around 40, which is the usual age of the wives and husbands in these stories, women are long past their prime. They can still easily get laid, by spread their legs for a horny guy they meet in a bar, but the chance of finding a "good man" their own age, who wants to marry them is incredibly small.

By contrast, if the husband has a decent career and doesn't fall into depression post-divorce, it's easy to land an attractive younger wife. I know lots of women in their early-thirties who are desperate to settle down and have children, having wasted their twenties being focused on a career. I also know a number of divorced husbands (their wives cheated on them) who all ended up happily married with younger wives. In every single case, the ex-wife was harder-up financially, settled for a guy they didn't really love, and regretted destroying the marriage.