Two Different Realities

"Wow, what a surprise." Carin said, "I love your new look, but what are you doing here?"

"First of all, I'm going to have a nice dinner with my girlfriend and her daughter. During the meal, I will explain." I said. "Amber thank you for helping me pull off this little surprise."

Just as we were starting to order our dinner when Meadow showed up.

"I hope I'm not too late," Meadow said as she sat down. "Ended up having to work a little bit longer than I planned."

During the meal, I explained that I was in town to test out a new model planned for release in three years. The biggest change was that the huge tractor was designed to run off natural gas. If it worked to our expectation the farmer would be able for the cost of labor build a refill station right on the farm. We had planned the cost needed to purchase the equipment to include the fixtures for the refill pump. Since natural gas was cheaper and cleaner than regular gasoline, we thought we had a very marketable product. If the test model was a success, the company would be offering it as part of a whole new line.

It was just before we prepared to order dessert when Carin's daughters asked the question. "Do you two hope to be settled in South Dakota before school starts in September?"

Carin said pretty much yes. Why? How far is Vermillion from your new home Mom? Amber asked. About forty miles from the farm? Why? I start working for an MBA at the University of South Dakota this fall if you'll allow me to live with you guys. If not, I can stay at Uncle Joseph's. I chose that one because the yearly cost is one of the cheapest in the country and I can cut down my cost of living.

Carin was smiling while trying to hold in her tears. I reached down taking her hand into mine. Holding it tightly.

Carin said quietly, "you were right."

"We are building a new four-bedroom house It will be finished sometime next month." I said "We wanted to be prepared in case you both decided to come. So, you will have to let your mother know what color scheme you will want for your bedrooms."

"You were both planning on both of us coming," Meadow said.

"More hoping, "Carin said, "We both had to let you make the decision on your own. If I had of forced you to, you both would have blamed Colin. He would have ended up paying for it in the long run because of the resentment you would have carried."

"How did you figure that out, Mom?" Amber asked.

"Colin asked me point blank if I trusted you two to make the right decision about what's best for yourselves. I said yes." She explained. "He said then let them because on what I have seen and learned about your relationship its stronger and more vibrate than what they have with their dad."

Amber and Meadow looked at me with puzzled eyes.

Then Amber spoke, "That first night you had sized us up by the time we left you had a good idea what we would end up doing didn't you Colin."

"I knew you were going for further education Amber and understood that it could be anywhere. Meadow was the one I concentrated on. It was when she brought out the point of respect that I knew how it would turn out." I explained. "The hardest thing I had to do was keep reminding your mother that it would all turn out aright. The hardest part in any situation is the unknown and the time to allow what is needed to come out."

We had just finished dinner and were leaving Carin and I was going to a theatre to see one of the latest releases. Amber and Meadow were heading home. That was when I was spotted by Kendra she was driving in as I was opening the car rental door for Carin.

It took her a few minutes to realize it was me because of the change in my appearance. My lifestyle was different as I no longer made my living sitting behind a desk looking at a computer. By the time she did, we were gone.

I had gotten slimmer working on the barn, installing a wood stove for heat in it while doing a general clean up. I had formed firmness to my muscles that I hadn't had in years. The old potbelly I had carried for years was long gone. I now had a slenderer build and looked younger than I had in years as the stress I carried was gone. In a lot of ways, I had been reborn. Parts of my soul that had been hidden by my relationships over time were coming out as if they had been set free.

I dropped Carin off after the movie and returned to my suite after leaving a request for a wake-up call in the morning.

Security recognized me and signed me in so I could get my first look at the finished new design. It was this that I had enjoyed the most. Seeing the finished product ready for final approval before mass-producing. Research and development can be quite boring but seeing the finished product in its glory made it worth it.

I got at it and was already into testing it before the rest of the team showed up. I had already discovered a couple of minor things that needed changing and had rerouted the feeding line so it wouldn't be affected by the direct heat. I had even written them up for the final report. Everybody was surprised and pleased with how good I looked.

The President came in when I was using the test tractor to haul then push back two thousand lbs. It handled and maneuvered with ease. Especially through the mud bed, we had formed for this test.

He had to laugh seeing me in a pair of blue jeans wearing a white t-shirt and a blue baseball hat on backward. Working that huge tractor liked I owned it. The gears changed smoothly. The tractor's arms could hold the weight we required it to. I tried to tip it numerous times but failed in every attempt. Even drove it on two wheels off a ramp and it came back down on all fours just like it should. The balance in this piece of equipment was excellent.

"Colin you're still the man." The President said. "If you could turn this tractor on your head you would. What's your first impression of this beast?"

"If it can take what I will put it through it's going to be in the top five that we have ever designed. So far besides a couple of minor adjustments, it's passing with flying colors. An added plus is that it uses less fuel than a normal diesel engine." I said as I offered my hand. "Good to see you again Pete."

"We would give you your old position back if you wanted." He said with a smile "But by the way you look I understand why you moved on. Where did you find the fountain of youth?"

Little did he understand that he had discovered the secret to my evaluating a new product. I treated it the same way I did my first truck. Like the piece of shit, it was. If it could survive what I would do to it then it became a good truck. By the end of the day, I said it had held up good, one down nine to go.

It was almost seven before I got back to my hotel. As I entered the lobby, I spotted my daughter Kerri and her husband David waiting. Kerri was holding little Colin. I walked in looking like I needed a shower as I was covered in dry mud from head to toe. Kerri spotted me and walked towards me.

"Hi Dad," she said. "You're looking really good. Do you have time to talk to us or not?"

I looked over at David and caught his signal, so I said yes but let me go have a shower first. Then David joined us.

"Look you two can wait here or come up and wait in the suite that has a kitchen," I said. "We can order food to be brought up or we can eat down here. Either way is fine by me."

"Let's go to your suite and order the food while your showering then we can have a private talk that's long overdue," Kerri said.

So that's what we did.

We ordered what we wanted through room service than I went for a quick shower. As I was getting dressed Carin called so I told her what was going on and promised to call her back when I was done.

I cracked open a bottle of Crown Royal and poured us all a drink. The kids wanted coke in theirs I added just a bit of water in mine and gave it a stir.

"Dad, David and I have been going through a lot of issues these last two months. It took the conversation you found to bring it to the forefront." Kerri said in seriousness. "I just moved home last week. Mom had been talking about her outside relationships for years. We all thought you knew and had approved. Mom had justified her conduct by saying the two of you had completely different sexual drives. David and I were getting nowhere so I had a polygraph done to help verify for both of us what I had or had not done. Until I did that we were headed for divorce."

"I see," I said. "I hope you both realize that because of the damage done to both of you that it's going to take time and complete honesty to rebuild a new relationship going forward."

I took my grandson into my arms and held the little tyke next to my chest with his little head resting on the shoulder. I asked David to take a picture of me holding him.

"I learned that in a lot of ways I was behaving like my mother who was justifying everything she did by her point of view. She can't see that it still does not make what she did right," Kerri went on to say. "I was doing it without thinking as it was so natural. I now find myself stopping to think a lot before doing anything. To be honest it's been quite a shock."

"Dad," David said. "I'm seeing a side of her that I didn't know was there. It has led me to believe that we have more than a fifty/ fifty chance of making it."

"Just remember it takes time, honest communication, and a heart and mind that really listens," I said. "Your both young so remember that it is not unreasonable to seek independent help or advice. Kendra allowed the views of society to interfere with our marriage until she justified to herself the throwing of her marriage vows away. I bet she still is blaming me for it ending."

"Dad, your right!" Kerri said. "I told my sisters that I was done listening to her justify herself. I had a marriage I wanted to save. We got into an argument and I told them that when they got their heads out of their asses we would talk. Until then don't waste my time."

With that said our food arrived. It was nice to share dinner with them. Kerri asked if I had been following some diet plan. I laughed and explained that I had just been working physically instead of mentally and my body was responding favorably. I no longer spend my days sitting behind a desk or on the couch. It was ten before they left. As they were leaving Kerri hugged me and whispered, I like this new Dad I'm seeing. I laughed and explained that since the divorce started parts that I had kept hidden were coming out because the long term relationship with your mother had affected me in ways I could not see.

I texted Carin to see if she was still up. She was so I called her and explained how the evening had gone.

Time heals all wounds is a favorite saying but that's not true. It just means that acceptance of what happened has come. Nothing more nothing less. You have trained yourself to adjust to it and accept what you cannot change. Still does not make it right although the progressive will claim it does.

Faith and Hope learned that the hard Tuesday night. It was again about seven when I walked into the lobby of the Hampton Inn. My two young daughters were waiting for me. My first thought was that Kendra had sent the double barrow shotgun at me. Boy was I, ever right! My twin daughters decided they were going to lecture me on my treatment of their mom. In their eyes, my conduct towards their mother was nothing but cowardness.

I had taken the young ladies back to my suite for privacy before they went after me for walking out of my marriage with their mother. They admitted that both their marriages were over because their husbands like me could not handle them being a totally modern-day liberated woman.

I had enough of their crap, so I called security. When security came, I asked him to remove the young ladies because I was not interested in what they were offering me.

My daughters were escorted out the back door and told not to ever return. The Hampton Inn security staff told them both that they did not appreciate high-class hookers trying to pass on some social disease to their unsuspecting guests.

Carin thought what I did was a hoot. She said those young ladies will be doing a lot of thinking tonight because without love someone is always paying for the sex in some way. Can I tell Amber and Meadow about this she asked? I said yes.

If one wanted to light a stick of dynamite without a match, I couldn't have done a better job. Kerri called my room about two hours later.

"Bravo Dad! Well done." Kerri said. "My two sisters have just learned that their shit stinks just like all others. They just left here still in tears."

"I couldn't resist the opportunity," I said in laughter, "because neither of them would give me the chance to explain anything. Their conduct made it clear they did not want to hear my explanation of it all. Finally, I made the only call I could."

"Security ran a background check on both of them they came up clean. Faith and Hope tried to explain. With you all having different last names they didn't buy it." Kerri said. "I told them when their friends with benefits were wining and dining them weren't, they, in fact, being paid for it in advance. By the look on their faces, I think they finally got it. I'm so glad now that I never went down the road. I'm ashamed now that I talked about it."

"Was David in on the conversation," I asked.

"He heard it all and was pleasantly surprised by how I explained things. It helped us a lot because we now are both seeing what happened with clear eyes." Kerri explained. "How could our mother have convinced us that what she was doing was all right?"

"Faith and Hope are really hurting; it's going to be a while before they will work it all out. They until that moment did not see that their conduct made them no better than the street people they had looked down upon for years." Kerri explained. "I said think about this you trashed our father for what he did. Did you ever think what our conduct and Mom did to him or did you only care about yourself?"

"That my dear is a question I'm still trying to answer for myself," I said.

"Mom painted our world with rose-colored glasses. Using her progressive views to make everything and anything acceptable. It took her getting caught for your daughters to see the reality of their world for what it was." Kerri said. "It's sad that most of our society is still wearing there's and are so blind to the truth that staring them right in the face."

"Kerri you learned something that a lot of adults will never understand in their life," I said.

"What's that Dad?" my eldest daughter asked.

"The skill, ability, and knowledge to think even about the simplest things in a logical way," I replied. "That is what makes your mother and my walk-in life so different. Welcome to my world. Too bad you had to learn it the hard way."

Wednesday night I went to Carin's for a family dinner. The girls wanted to start planning for the move and how we were going to get it done. I told them what I had learned from Kerri the previous night. After dinner we did the dishes up, I washed the girls dried and put away. The girls finally caught us kissing seriously. They kept teasing us about it for the rest of the evening.

Carin and I were out getting ready to enjoy a private dinner at a restaurant down by the pier on Friday evening. We were sitting across from each other looking into each other's eyes having a drink before ordering when the twins walked in.

The Hostess approached us. Your daughters noticed you Mr. Waite and were wondering if you would allow them to join your table. I hesitated but Carin said yes, we would like them to. I stood up and moved over to sit down beside her.

"You can't leave things the way they are with them. No matter what. I know you don't like them right now, but you still love them." Carin said. "So, you have to hear them out."

Whether I liked it or not Carin was right. We watched as the hostess brought my daughters to our table. By their look, we both realized they had a lot on their minds. I waited until they sat down.

"Faith and Hope let me introduce you to Carin who not only is my lawyer but now my girlfriend," I said firmly. "If you're here to berate me some more please just leave."

"Dad we deserve that," Faith said. "We had a long talk with Kerri Tuesday night. She was brutal with us and pulled no punches."

"We went there expecting some support." Hope explained. "what we got was the truth shoved down our throats. By the time she was through with us we knew just what our own conduct had shown about ourselves."

"It really does not paint us in a good way." Faith added. "Kerri showed us that we were getting paid for our services like a hooker but in a different way."

"We talked about our conduct between ourselves and came to the understanding that a lot of street people do it for money to survive not by choice. Yet we were high and mighty and judged them for it." Hope explained "We did it because we thought it was fun and believed that we were doing no wrong. It makes our actions a lot worse."

"When we got home, we confronted Mom about it. We ended up in a huge argument. Mother ended up saying we had been listening to too much of your conservative bull shit." Faith said. "Mom in one of her rants said so what if others got hurt, they should learn to grow up. In our society, the only wrong is getting caught. There are no consequences for social crimes."

"Look at our Federal government we have some of the biggest politicians making money illegally and nothing happens to them. It shows the laws only apply to some. Nothing is black or white." Hope said. "Each of us has the right to live our lives as we see fit. Mom still has no remorse or guilt. That's when it hit us. We teach our students what is right and wrong, but we have blurred what that is by our own conduct."

"We are down here today because we found a two-bedroom furnished apartment nearby that we have rented for six months." Faith explained. "It's reasonable and close to the school we both teach in. We both figure it's the first step in rebuilding our lives. It's time for us to stop living mother lies and find out who we are without her influence."

"Hope and I will be moving in tomorrow since Mom is going to be busy with some political party thing." Faith added. 'When we saw you, we both realized we had to apologize to you because we were so wrong."

"Dad you really had no choice but to do what you did. We see that now. If you had faced us directly it would have been four against one." Hope said. "You knew we had to work through it in our own way."

"Sometimes, you just have to allow things to work out on their own," I said. "You were already forgiven because I saw your behavior as being influenced by your mother. Kendra, I will forgive but will never give her a second chance again. Her actions have always been self-centered and deliberate."

With that said I handed them my cell phone and asked them to add their contact information in. They did and added my new number in theirs.

"What area is the phone number for?" Hope asked.

"South Dakota," I said

"Omg you moved back to grandpa's farm," Faith said with a huge smile. "He would be so proud."

"You know the farm?" Carin asked.

"Yes, Dad made sure the three of us spent every summer there growing up," Hope said. "Until we started high school and developed the typical teenage attitude. We all learned to drive on Grandpa's tractor."

"Dad always drove us out and brought us back. He talked to us every night while we were there. We never heard from mom the whole time we were gone. We learned that with her it was out of sight out of mind." Faith said. "Grandma used to say mom was the shallowest person she had ever known. So, Dad why are you in town? Carin, can we get your cellphone number?"