All Comments on 'Two Weeks in Maui'

Why is it that so many writers on here have scenes where a woman covers a guy's dick in suntan lotion or massage oil, then immediately starts to suck him? Just think for a second. Women don't suck cocks covered in lotion

I loved your story set on the most beautiful island in the world. However, all Hawaiians and Hawaiians-at-heart are sensitive about the spelling of our names and place names. It is Leilani and Pa'ia. I hope you will write more stories with this special place as a backdrop.

there are many more spelling mistakes than leilani and pa'ia, such as lahaina. this story needs serious editing, and doesn't really reflect anything about hawai'i. sorry.

Please learn the difference between "there" (a place) and "their" (possessive). Also it should have read a "cheap" thrill. Cheep is a sound that a baby chick makes.

Despite a few spelling mistakes (far less than many semi-literates who post here) an excellently rendered tale and very believable. Done with sensitivity and respect for all characters and, thank goodness, no stupid comments on "my modest 9" cock"

Well done, I shall look out for more from you.

Usually, when I discover a story will run more than 2 pages I'll skip over it, but the pace of your story kept me enthralled to the end!!! I'm really curious to find out what happened after they got home. I sincerely hope you write more chapters!!!

Great job and don't let those english critics discourage you.

By the way - what was in that tea??? .... just kidding !!!

I enjoyed the story from the start to the finish. Something not many stories can do, for me anyway.

Keep up the good work.

You hit all the buttons and moved about without repetition or soridness. The very large elements which made it arousing and entertaining to me was both the sharing atmosphere and the respect show for and by each party.

In such a comfortably created manner you were credible author. Was it perfect - of course not but as a first effort it was very much - no significently above average.

This was a 12 author and if you continue to do this arousing work with respect for your characters and us then you will always be appreciated and respected yourself.

To carry this a bit further, in my mind you are one of the first writers that can be labeled author out of the gate. We are sure you spent a lot of time on this which we appreciate. This effort of yours shows what can be achieved with reasonable mindset emulating in some way life at an arousing pitch but keeping the base unrealistic pervertions and absurdities at bay. Others should take note as this was large stuff.

Since there is always room for betterment consider an editor - you can get better faster with one if you wish.

Thanks Author - more please at considered interval - with high Regard

...your editor needs to go back to editing school. Too many spelling errors for pleasant reading; each time my mind has to review the meaning, it jars me out of the story. This is a common problem with Lit stories, which is too bad in this case, because otherwise it's a pretty hot tale.

This was an extremely erotic read with hot women going for this guy. This is definitely something that many men fantasize about and frankly I am no exception. The thought of three sexy women (actually four with the housekeeper) working this guy over had me on overdrive the whole time I read it. You would think I had had a cup of her miracle tea.

Those who commented on the spellings and grammer issues are actually right but who really cares about that when this is such an erotic tale. Eventually you will clean up those things and some will have to find something else to complain about.

Thank you for your excellent work. I really enjoyed it. I look forward to your next posting.

Charleybear

This story makes the unlikely seem possible. The women are treated with respect - rare in these stories.

Never mind the jerks that say bad stuff of your writing the "proper way".They are snobs looking at the wrong thing.

This was the sexest story I have ever read.You did very well.You drew out the story very nicly instead of just a quick fuck.It kept my cock hard the whole time.

You made my cunt wet and stimulated as I read this fine story. It was so hard for me not to make myself cum. Very good, lucky women. Betty

Kool story . LUVED IT LUVED IT LUVED IT>,....

Beautifully captures the joys and feelings one can have with people that one knows and those we are willing to get to know. Very very well done and my compliments to the author.

not sure if we are talking of an in-family harem or what...

Enjoyed the story, but please go take some English classes. Incorrect tenses, "there" instead of "their", "ridged" vice rigid, "your" where you mean "you're" all tell me you (and your helper) rely on a computer to correct your errors. I.E., some good editing is certainly in order. Please keep writing, I love beach stories. The errors are a distraction from an otherwise excellent piece of work.

I loved this story. It was beautifully constructed, and very horny. This guy is the luckiest bastard of all time

However, your editor needs to have his/her arse reamed a few times. as the spelling and grammar were deplorable. In fact, this great story was nearly fucked by bad spelling. Not good enough.

Spelling? Sentence structure? Punctuation? Writing ability? Bah !!!!

Just idiot mind shit.

GREAT STORY!!! Trying to talk my wife into bringing my sister-in-law along on our next vacation. Don't know how she'll feel after she reads this story. Keeping my fingers crossed!!!!

I would love to see how this family has gotten along now a few years later.

Lit really needs a category for poly-amory. Have read many (well, a few) stories on this subject. Of course, if a woman does it, she is a slut. What is the masculine of slut?

I started reading a story by Biscuithammer with a great plot about a recently divorced guy getting a roommate half his age who enjoyed regular sex with him plus growing close to another great gal friend half his age (who approved his roommate) and their sexual tension was building in the right direction. Even though technically well written, I abandoned the story because somehow it did not do it for me.

With that background I start searching and stumble onto this gem by greathands660. Made me think of how one singer can be technically good, hitting all the right notes but it's like, "yeah, OK I guess". While another singer, maybe not so technically qualified, grabs me, makes me sit up and say, "yeah she's got it."

greathands660 has got it -- great hands on the keyboard.

The comment by Anonymous, 01-09-06 (titled: Very Impressive Author) is a wonderful analysis of this masterful story. Charleybear's comment was also great.

I wish greathands660 was still submitting stories.

Maybe another Literotica author would like to provide us with a sequel to this lovely tale.

The spelling and grammer, mentioned by others, were a nonissue with me.

Paul in Oklahoma

PS. I was so impressed with this story, I immediately read the author's other two stories. I don't know whether to choose this one or Second Chance at Great Love as the best -- each are great for different reasons. Even runner-up Nutcracker Blizzard is 5 stars.

Scary good. Most men’s dream to “help out” a wife’s sister if they are allowed. A good length. Including the housekeeper was inspiring as introducing lomi-lomi (Hawaiian massage). Love the elements of skinny dipping, massage, nude beach, strangers and friends. Love to read more.

12 years ago???!??? Well written

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