All Comments on 'Two Years'

it was great in the beginning but after they kissed it jumped around try to center it and keep a good flow

A pretty good story for your first time, you might want to yoke other writers experience, my favorite writers here are (Ahabscribe, Many Feathers, BaronSade, & rgjohn) the fist writer is my absolute fav of all four. You have not a bad style so far just don't rush it and I know you'll be great.

Nice job, I really enjoyed your story, Thanks for your time and effort.

this was way to rushed no way people go from being mad as hell to kissing and being in love that fast. what you wrote here should have been spread out over weeks or months delete this and rewrite it and take your time this isn't a race. when she woke up and saw the flowers more than likely she would have crumpled them up and dumped them on his bed then gone back to hers. she was so hurt there is no way she would have been in the spare room that first day she would have avoided and ignored him at all costs. KEEP IT ATLEAST SOMEWHAT REALISTIC AND BELIEVABLE PLEASE.

I think you should go to the forums and find an editor for your next story. There are spelling errors and I agree with the above. You should have spread your story out a little more and put some more time into it.

Blackstal21

I liked it, will leave the technical writing stuff to those that know more about that stuff. I thought it rang of more real life, thus I can see some of those that thought it rushed. It is my opinion and worked in my own real life experiences with my sister and mother that there was no real build up just taking advantage of spur of the moment opportunity not a lot of thought given to drawn out seduction. The first time with my sister was the result of a tickle fight got out hand turned sexual and we went with it. The first time with mom came at a costume party dad paid me to take his place so he could watch a game on TV, mom was drinking and while not drunk she was horny and since dad and I are of similar build I took advantage of the chance before me, as she thought I was dad. My going down on her was the give away but by that time she was feeling so good and being mad at pop she went with the flow as it was. One aside with that as my dad had a vasectomy and as mom let him believe that she thought he attented the party, he could say nothing when she became pregnant as result of our sex. The shorten version is the sexual relationships with both continue still with sis and mom has since passed but we had sex up until almost the very end, pop never said one word positive or negative but as he got older and had e.d. think he was glad I was keeping her home, he never once commented to me about the head board banging the wall and the moans when mom or sis paid visits to my bed.

Your story is Fabulous! There are the spelling errors previously mentioned but the story is just excellent!

Good but you need longer and more detailed sex parts

Great story. But as said before it's rushed. The whole story could have been 3 more pages. Try to givemore details. Make us feel as if we're the one to whom it happens.

I loved your story! You could perhaps "flesh it out" a little longer and get yourself a volunteer editor, but I like your style.

This story's pretty much the best emotional case scenario for an incest romance, they really love each other, nobody freaks out, they get to be together, be a couple, make babies, treat each other right, etc.

I think your more recent series An Ordinary Guy's a lot more realistic. Depressing and harsh, but it's real.

I like that in both stories there's a struggle whether to yield to the incestuous impulse that could cross over into Gothic narm territory (i.e. could go from poignant to laughable) if handled incorrectly but you aced that in both this story and AOG.

Bravo on multiple counts. I like the sense of place and character setting the scene as well.

My only mild quibble is I sense a little cut-and-paste with the physiques, names, and so forth, but hey, you're working with what you're comfortable with.

Keep up the splendid work!

Thank you so much for writing this it was awesome! Adorable sexy romantic everything loved the surprise ending!

Such a lovely and wonderful story. I could feel real emotion for jess and mike

I really like this one this is the type of incest stories i used when i had issues last year to cheer me up. I cinda wonder how this story would look if continued But. I am really happy with how it is.

Enjoyed that :)

I for one would love to see you return to this story and rewrite/fill out all of the "unwritten" parts that were left well ..... unwritten