All Comments on 'Whisper'

Love your stories, but didn't like this one. I didn't find the slightly extended ending on this site any more likeable than the abrupt ending posted on another site. Her whisper didn't seem to make any sense based on the rest of the storyline, unless she was lying. This ending left me not feeling good about either of the main characters. Disappointing.

This ending is better....thanks for sharing.

This ending was much better. She did not cheat, she loves her hubby, and she is a very honest caring character as written.

Well done!!! A fine TLW!!!! Not as good as Back on the Block, but very good. Definitely not "cookie-cutter" either.

5*****

The wife's story is pure bullshit. I didn't like this version either. It left a bad taste in my mouth. Court ordered to rub her stomach... Please!

What I liked the most about this story was the way Stang kept it going where you least expected it. From the first incident where the guy dumped his girlfriend when she tried to Miller him I laughed my ass off. I got scared for a while though when he fell in love with Peyton I kept thinking if he marries her won't her name be Peyton Place? I kept thinking that this was one of those stories like JPB's second best. I thought that the wife was cheating the whole time. But the end killed me. I just don't get it. Most of the people here don't think apparently that emotional affairs are cheating. The woman used the poor guy as a human vibrator while she was imagining herself getting fucked by Larry. Anyone with balls or pride the way this guy had always been described as having would have done the same thing.

There is a lot of reference to a different version of this story on another site. Can

someone tell me the name of the other site so that I can read the alternative to this story and Fur?

like the story but the end thru me for a loop. i know this man had insercurities , and jealousy.. but after all was said and done. they never strayed .she loved him gave him another child of his own went into this relationship with his eyeys open, it seems he married her beauty more than her personality.. yet he divorces her because she mentioned anothers name when having sex, a slip of the tongue. no infidelity . so this ending makes no sense and is so strange and foreign to me.. what was that all about??????

I love you writitng and fur what other site is the stuff p[osted pleas let me know.

as usual a well written SS06 story. I think Will only problem is he suffers from the "Captain Save a Hoe" complex. I'm not callaing Peyton a "whore". But why put ypurself through all this crap for a women that's not carrying your baby. Larry might be an asshole, lying, cheating bastard but he has a right to know that Two is his son. It didn't jive with me, I mean Will went through all this for a women he barely knew.

Where's the other one? I was loving it until the final whisper...I'd like to read the other story.

This story is ... but to me it is forced and contrived and it kind of ruins the whole story.

FIRST ... Will does not want to be roped into a marriage before he is ready so he dumps KATHY be cause of this massive manipulation or scheme that she and his ( Will's) sister come up with. OK ... fine ... It's nice to see a guy with the backbone in a sense of right and wrong that will not be forgotten the moment he sees a Vagina.

But that doesn't seem to match the setup with PEYTON. He is constantly accused by everyone including Peyton's family of being the guy who got her pregnant.

Yet for some reason WILL cannot seem to find 5 seconds the say .."Hey it was not me" . Instead we get this gibberish

"Yes," I said. "I'm the one who..." I was going to say, "I'm the one who told her to tell you she was pregnant."

"Well good," he said. "You can take her ass with you..." I later learned that he was only upset and never intended to kick Peyton out of the house.

"I will," I spat.

This is just awful cliche storytelling. Suddenly this strong guy with a backbone cannot find 2 seconds to say " I am NOT the father..."

Even worse is that throughout the story Peyton and then Payton's mother complement Will on standing up to Peyton's tyrannical father. What the fuck are they talking about? Can someone explain to me which part of being accused of something you did not do... THEN not saying ANYTHING to set the record straight... is standing up for your self?

SECOND.. a YEAR of YOUR LIFE?

Once Will and Peyton Hook up... she asks him for a year of his life.Ok. But from that point on the entire rest of the story is premised on the idea that will thinks that after one year she will be leaving. Sorry I don't get that. This was a conversation which took place and seems to be the reason why Will thinks their only going to be together for one year.

"No, I wanted a year of your life," she said seriously.

"Peyton, I'm twenty two," I said. "I've got a lot of years left. You can have one of them."

"Seriously?" she asked and her face got even brighter.

You see? It makes no sense at all based upon that conversation for Will to think that they will only be together for 1 year . Peyton doesn't insist on one year she seems to be very happy that she can have as much time with him as she wants .

THIRD ...OVER HEARING HALF A CONVERSATION

This did not even come close to working. It was telegraphed and obvious that Will had misheard part of a conversation... And that he was making these huge leaps in logic and assumptions without any facts whatsoever. It was not the least convincing.

I read the other one too and this is worse. Pheremones? Smells more like CRAP to me!

Boring & stupid. Where can I find the "meaner one"?! Is it just as boring & stupid? You really didn't need 7 pages of the story, 3 pages would've been better.

Don't you think he gave that right away when he left town. Maybe not in the law eyes, but in reality he said no thanks. Now he wants its back not to be a father but as ends something else he cares about more.

The misunderstandings that drive this story remind me of Jack Tripper and Chrissy Snow trying to get one over on Mr. Roper. I liked some of the plot elements but 2 things kept me from liking it as much as others. 1) I suspended my disbelief over the phermone crap until she was unbuttoning her blouse at the hospital. That move destroyed the likeability of her character. Sure, she resisted, but still....Really? With so much at risk? 2) When Will only hears part of the convo, as dedicated to her as he's been, you think that he would hear her out at least once (giving her the chance to lie) before deciding to run away and call it quits. I'm sure you did this for the plot device and to fullfill the promise of the title, but in the end it left us with characters we wanted to like and root for, but just ended up dissapointed in. After beating Larry up, how could his manhood be so fragile that her saying his name one time in bed brought on the divorce action? If he was trying to proove a point to her, it was lost and not expanded on before you wrapped up a story about two people who despite all they had been through, still hadn't learned how to talk to eachother before going off half-cocked and unaware. Last thing, if she really loved him, she would have moved to Boston with him after "two" was born so he could go to MIT, and it should have fit her plan to stay married and support him in becoming successful to his full potential. Oh well......

Interesting plotline, fun characters and good writing but I think that the other version is closer to reality. I can not imagine recovering my self-esteem if my wife did something like that to me! Yes, Larry could get a court-ordered DNA test and demand rights, but I do not think he would have the focus to do that..

The main character is such a puppet. And what is the deal with Larry? is he drugging people? Does he have mind controlling super powers? When you don't even leave a hint as to how his amazing seduction powers work it just ruins the entire story.

this actually happens more than you think! i hope she stays faithful and true!

For a change the man was utterly stupid and the woman was calculative - but in any case insipid characters and equally vapid story.

have not read it yet but i dont remember two versions of Fur and it is one of my favorites. i will read this one with anticipation as i do all of your stories.

you once were a gifted writer with good plot. the stories were excellent, then the plot went south and the stories were good, than average, than bad and it got worse and the level now is sick. not a single character has an IQ over 40 and if I believe you, shit the hole population of your country is that way. no wonder you live all ready in a third world country but there is a difference you did choose it to be one. sad, really sad.

about a VERY stupid man surrounded by poorly drawn characters. A long way from any of your better efforts.

I read the SOL version and the ending was completely illogical. This one is more realistic and feels much better to me.

Good Job.

Interesting story. Somehow I liked this psycho first wife in spite of her craziness and ended up rooting of her. IRL I once worked where there was a guy a lot like the Larry character in the story - somehow he ended up with a nonstop stream of women.

Maybe trying too hard. But earlier stories were much better.

Until the end.....leaving it open like that is like getting to first base with a hot date and then he or she has to go home,it leaves you empty,not feeling filled.

You are a great writer. You have a great sense of humor and an interesting perspective on life. However, 7 pages is too long for a misunderstanding story. It was a weak plot device and kind of manipulative. You are generally very interesting to read. Take a little more time with the next one. While I will be looking forward to it, I was a little irritated by the weak ending to this one.

SSO6, fun story as always. The plot reminds me a bit of a another story on LIT were the guy marries the pregnant girl (b/c long time crush), but divorced her later when he learns she still has an infatuation with her original boy friend. She learns too late who she loves, they divorce and get back together later years later.

Thanks again and keep writing.

This is the first SS06 story I have been unable to finish. I sincerely hope it is my own mood and not that he has lost his touch.

The SOL version of the story was the nice one. After she betrayed her feelings by crying out for Larry in bed (plus whatever she covered up by cutting off the "what about b..." revelation), Will got to file for divorce and be an involved father. Here he is hoodwinked into cohabitation by a spurious judicial decree. How is this nice?

Unlike the majority of readers here, I actually prefer the other version. It is too abrupt, but there is something more 'real' about his reaction there. This Will is inevitably going to succumb to Peyton, compromising his pride.

I can't imagine a scenario where she whispers Larry's name, given all of the events that preceeded their lovemaking that day. No 'subconscious' slip after fighting so hard, after leaving Larry's presence hours before. It fails the logic and credibility test, Stang. No pheromone to bewitch her in her bedroom, no reason to even have his name in her head. They were discussing how good Will felt inside her, how they needed to keep it down to let Two sleep.

Larry comes out of her mouth then why? You tell me...because I don't see it. And no man will stand for that kind of emasculation- your wife uttering another man's name while you are actively doing her. How does one come back from that, especially with the insecurities that Will has? No, the alternate ending just makes more sense.

I want to like Peyton, I do. But she had the power to end this extended farce when he was cutting the hedges. By then, she knew why she was bitchy. All she had to do was say- "Sorry, Will. Hormones. But in nine months I'll be much better."

Problem solved. Of course, there's no story that way, but even at Kathy's she could have fixed it. No, she held off for some dramatic reason, rather than putting her husband completely at ease. She is a natural manipulator, and it is always about her. He's better off with someone he can absolutely trust. He needed to get away from her.

It's an acronym, folks. Google it or yahoo search it.

This is the first story I have read of yours where I despised the husband... Nuff said.

Old Marine Vet

It was interesting and it was good to see a smart woman.

so tired of Stories where the guy get used by conniving whores. Maybe the Taliban will take over the unfairness of the judicial system.

i know a lot will say he is a cuck etc but the story was great it just needs to be finished either will gets back with payton or moves on but finish it.

What kind of crazy ending is this? Why in blazes is she wanting Larry? And why the heck does Will stay with her after that?

Like Monolith said, there was no reason at all for Peyton to have Larry in mind when fucking Will. Unless she had been fantasizing about Larry all the time, but that is NOT the case according to the story.

This totally goes over into the realm of fantasy. Larry who can make any woman drop her panties, no matter what he says or does, or how he looks like. Just by being near him, they unconsciously strip. EVEN when they actively hate him.

And Will going back to Peyton, after she pulled that stunt? With that kind of history? Sorry, but the ending ruined it. I like the other ending more.

Most jack ass on here think with their Dicks so Trust Her And Gave Her a Chance she made a Mistake in Saying his name so what she love you and you love her so work it out!!!! it's not worth it you gave in to her 9 years ago it must mean something you love her she really love you so make it work and forgive!!!!!

ruined the story. and that crap of putting another version elsewhere, what the hell is that? Why not write half the story here and the other half on toilet paper and flush it down the hole?

I truly enjoy your stories and this one was no exception until the ending(s). In my mind there wasn't enough conflict through the years that appeared solid enough to warrant "the whisper". I can see where hints here and there could make a reader think there was a plausible explanation for that one moment but you did too good a job of ensuring Peyton's undying love through the years with minimal conflict to make that lapse believable. I can certainly see Will's initial reaction b/c heck - mine would be the same! It's the premise of the story up to that point that drives a lack of conviction into that moment... Please keep writing though... Still think you do a great job.

They say that Pablo Picasso never knew when to stop working on a painting and could keep on working till it was ruined. Consequently his secretary would often come in and remove his work before he got too carried away and destroyed his work. Stangman, you got carried away and went too far. That last bit was over the top, so hire a secretary to pull your keyboard away from you so you can stop when you should.

That said, loved the sleazo getting the snot punched out of him.

And an obtuse one when it coms to women, but I am a relationship councilor compared to the husband. Way too little plot. Either double or triple the plot, or whack to babble. On and on about obvious shit, ehhh!

You are too good a writer to do this.

Ask your editor to tighten the story, please!

of the ridiculous ending!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You always submit good stories, interesting and well written and with good meat for realism but - calling Larry at the end.....that just is so beneath you.

I'm sure you disappointed most of your fans and yes, you know, you have many so - please, don't do this again.

Good stories need a conclusion and we know you are creative so, don't let us down!

I always look forward to your weekly stories. Both you and Mikothebaby submit well written, creative and compelling stories. Keep up the great work!

After reading Whisper's nicer ending, I was left wanting to read the other ending as well. I tend to like it when you put both endings in the same submission and let the reader decide their preference. Overall a good story. Can you point me to where the "other" version is located?

liked the story as usual but the ending was weird because she was all keyed up by larry and resisted him. that doesn't make sense that so many hours later she was still keyed up about jackass. will needs to shut up sometime and let people talk so he can stop leaping to conclusions and getting in trouble. Good ending but would like to read the other version. Where is it?

i didn like end

did it was really end ???????

because its fill like u submit story before u finish it . i mean what with "what should I do?... "

shouldn't it batter ending with they dont have divorce or they divorce in end then him asking What should I do?...

Part 2?

What's the address of the other site that has a different ending or version?

Thanks.

When the power went out. Where is the rest of the story? Are we all just standing at midfield waiting for the power to come back on? Stang I love your work but we need to know where or how the story ends

Liked the other version better..

It didn't really end and SS you need to learn when a baby's gender can be found out, she's 2 months along? (she had 7 months to go) so 8 weeks and already knows its a girl? I seem to remember another story of yours with the same thing.

Sorry SS for me the whisper part didn't work,perhaps if it had happened at the begining of the tale but towards the end... I realise that we are all only reading fiction but I do have a problem when a story's character/s do something totally against what we the reader have been led to believe, But still look forward to your next tale!

... As much as I hate to say this, you're writing more like a woman every day. Having read both versions or, actually, both supposed "endings" to this sad little tale, I'm surprised that you would consider this version "nice" and the one posted on the other site "mean". At least in the "mean" version, Wil grew some balls. As I read this "nice" version, I couldn't help but wonder how Wil's character who was supposedly so smart could act so stupidly. He has to be your most wimpy protagonist ever or, at least, in the top five.

Look, as you can hopefully see from most of these comments, what both versions lacked, in the end, was closure. Irregardless of what JPB or any other author says about readers ending a story in their mind, NOBODY reading these stories wants to do that. I really hope this doesn't become a pattern for you. Please give up all this wimpy shit and come back to us. I know that I, for one, really miss you.

Where the hell is the other version?

If you omit the part about her starting to unbutton her blouse at the hospital and if you stop reading at "you don't want Two to wake to the sound of his mother screaming", this could have been submitted as a Romance story. Barring being drugged and/or brainwashed, I'm not sure how Larry, who left her in the lurch after getting her pregnant and disowned by her family eight years prior, could "do funny things to her head" especially after he'd been busted up by Will and was lying in the hospital and apart from that scene and the part where she inexplicably called out Larry's name during sex, there doesn't seem to be anything else showing that Peyton did anything wrong.

... the other version is at storiesonline.net. Hope that helps cantbuymy and others.

How does it make you feel when your wife whispers her ex's name whilst in the throws of passion?

How about when they shout their name out loudly? Awkward...

I always enjoy your writing, Stang, but mostly because of your ability to continue coming up with fresh or unique plots. Unfortunately, this story like many of those you've written, comes apart in the second half. I probably don't do any better in my authoring, but in my humble opinion you overwork most of your stories; apparently hitting that 'author's wall' in how to continue what started out as a good plot. Despite what may be taken as my negative comments, I still praise you for your work and sincerely hope you continue writing.

The main character does not deserve happiness. He is the most unsympathetic protagonist I have read in decades. The dumb shit deserves a crappy apartment and estrangement from all people who are decent. His self perpetuating angst causes everyone pain including the one who loves him for the right reasons. I dislike him sitting here an hour after reading the story. And those readers who are into the wife's crap for the mistake. Get real. As a shrink I can say it does not have a unconscious meaning. Freud said, "sometimes a cigar is just a cigar." In my family, my ex wife is invited to attend. After the occasion, I have been known to call my present wife by the ex's name. I do not want my ex wife in my life nor do I want her body. It happens because of the setting and we were married 18 years. I remember my grandmother when she would start to talk to one of us grandkids. Frequently, she would not get the name right and us grandkids would patiently let her run through the names until she hit the right one. For pity sake's people, I am glad I am not in your life and a target for your judgment. The wife in this story is a frickin' saint. The protagonist/hubby is a self talking self convincing putz. Stang Man had to have made it so obvious that you had to see he was the cause of his own unhappiness. Should have killed him off. He needs it.

This was a good read right up to last two pages. Somehow the story fell apart thereafter. I would have given a 5 except for the last two pages which ruined the whole thing. My high five went to a lousy two as a result.

Your male leads are getting dumber and dumber and more and more prideful. It is getting boring. I have never rated you below a five and I doubt I ever will because I appreciate you sharing your talent with us, but you are stuck in a rut. It seems obvious from your stories that you got hurt in a previous relationship, however, it is my understanding that you are happily remarried. My advice to you: build a bridge and get over it! Use your talent to write something else.

and nothing is happening.

Wife says to husband:

"What's the matter? You cannot think of anyone either?"

Thanks to late great Rodnry Dangerfield, and thanks to SS06 for his work on this story!

SS06 finally writes a story about a wife who isn't an utterly stupid braindead whore and in the end he can't leave well enough alone, so we get this twisted, jumbled thing.

Seriously Stang, you need to define where you want to go and then work to make it coherent.

The comments by some of the other readers are amusing, however.

Pheromones. We all know that there are guys out there with an unreasonably high talent for bedding women right and left; they're the assholes who make the nice guys wonder what is wrong with women. More baffling though, is the occasional complete fuck-up of a guy like Larry Miller who has the same unreasonable rate of success. How does he do it? People have theories about guys like that. Charm, pheromones, the ability to lie like the devil himself, cock size, or the ability to think like a woman. But the truth is they don't have any idea, and the fact is that these guys make an imprint on women in a heavy, if bad way. Enough to make a woman blurt out the wrong guy's name during sex? Maybe. Hurtful as fuck, either way, because people want to believe that love conquers all and that someone would never have a distracted moment (even if sex is pure distraction) where they make that mistake.

Manipulation. This is the bit that really makes me giggle, and I'm not sure if Stang meant it this way and was being incredibly ironic and making an awesomely believable character, or if he was eating the same cake of Delusion that some of the readers are and honestly believes that Kathy was conniving but Will was not. Think about it. There is several paragraphs devoted to exactly what kind of girl Kathy was to Will. He never told her (manipulation) but she was his practice girl, the kind that's there to fuck, but not meant for marriage. He used her plenty happily, never cluing her in with the honest truth until she attempted to manipulated him back. Then OMG the sky is falling, bitch tried to manipulate me! Afterward, he completely estranges himself from his sister for the manipulation, and then goes on to manipulate both his entire family and Peyton's entire family by lying about the father of the child.

Lol, yeah. There are guys who think nothing of manipulating people like that (pure double standard), and it's an interesting character flaw that doesn't make someone into a pure asshole because all people have double standards to one degree or another. If it was deliberate on Stang's part, kudos for awesome. Unfortunately, can't rate reader comments down for embracing that double standard. Oh we

Man/Woman Disconnect. It takes a mature writer to understand something like this and write it well, and it's clear that some of the readers really don't get it. There are two completely different perspectives even in a successful relationship. We hear the jokes about it all the time: Man says one thing, woman interprets it an entirely different way. Will says, "One year? Sure thing, baby." Peyton hears, "I'm willing to spend an entire year with you, so that means I feel something for you, and therefore I'll probably fall in love with you and your child and we can be together forever."

Funny on comedy channels, not so funny in practice.

Good stuff, keep on writing.

everybody getting upset over the ending, REALLY? Look it's set up to where YOU make up your own definite conclusion on what happened. Maybe that was a deal breaker, maybe that wasn't. He could possibly make her go through hoops before letting things slide, or before kicking her to the curb. They could possibly go to counseling, and he got his issues taken care of while she got help with the reason for that slip of the tongue. Maybe he went with a scorched earth policy and outed the truth and sued her and him into the poor house and took just his child or took both children. Maybe he hired some Russian assassins and got rid of the problem(s). That is what is great about stories like this it leaves it up to YOU to make the ending that YOU are happy with. SS06 keep it up and just remember you only have critics when you are doing something correctly. 5*****

Guy changed his whole life on the off chance she would fall for him. You can bet he'll forgive her. We don't need an ending to figure that out. However, I do feel the reader needs some closure on why in hell she would say Larry's name. You did such a great job of writing her as the loving and committed wife. I was convinced! And then this? Doesn't make sense. And then she hardly sheds a tear, runs out to get a lawyer, and then manipulates him into coming home. I don't know which is the real Peyton: the wife madly in love with her husband, or the spoiled manipulative hottie that gets whatever she wants? I need an ending to help restore her status as a loving wife, not to find out what he does.

Wonderfully written, though a tad predictable (until the very end). Five stars for keeping me engaged and smiling.

Can't wait to read the other version. Can't imagine how that one will end.

Just read the alt ending. I guess it seems drastic that this guy is pushing for divorce for just a slip. However, it is only the reader that knows the truth. As far as he knows, she must be fucking the guy and simply feeding him a line of bullshit. What would you think if you had suspected your wife was cheating and then she says the dudes name while your fucking her? You would think the worst. Her friend must have been lying to you. That is why we need an ending to the hopeful version. The dude deserves the truth. She didn't cheat. Are we going to let this loving couple suffer because if a whisper?

Still don't like the ending but its better than the ending on SOL.

for finally changing your plot line... and then there you go again.

You have an amazing talent, but it gets drowned in the sameness of the same old plot. Try something different. Please?

same old same old from a one dimension author. Talented writing, no imagination.

We have just entered the real world ? maybe !

Good plot device - we hear about it all the time - she fucked up but not BIG time just big.

Should he get over it - if he can get over raising Larry's kid he can get over this - he knows what Larry does to women so he knows they do not want what he offers - and Pey did actually resist his charms this time. So that ought to count for something -she also found the perfect answer to keeping Larry away which counts too -

So all in all they ought to make it for ever now - as long as they both keep an eye out for Larry -

I think mustang man is losing his balls, ome gram at a time. Count this as one of his recent stories that I couldn't stomach. The wife is a lying, conniving bitch and her husband is a dumb ass wimp.

this is just sitcom crap--two people having different ideas in mind and using pronouns to create hilarious situations based on the misunderstanding that will be resolved with a good, hearty laugh at the end.

This crap is awful in a bad, formulaic sitcom, and even worse in a short story.

"and Pey did actually resist his charms this time. So that ought to count for something"

The only problem is that he doesn't know that. The reader has that perspective. Again, given she says his name during sex, he has to assume she actually is fucking around. The only way around this is for an extended ending that allows him to find out the truth.

I usually like your stories but this is just plain freakin stupid

between all mentions of priests, and then the use of gods name in vane, I stoped reading on the 2nd page and rated it 1 *

priests are nothing more than the comman man, worshiped by many undesireable people.

could you write this worthless BS/CRAP. while not the best you were a very good

story teller. but keep this up for future , you will get 1 *, without even reading the story.

with whiney commenters who feel entitled. Normally, unless I can say some thing nice, I remain silent. But the comments on "Whisper" have really provoked me. SS06 (and Mikothebaby] spend their time, energy, and considerable talents providing us readers with entertainment. FOR FREE!!! If you don't like it, ask for a refund! And those stooping to personal attacks are beneath contempt

BTW - I liked the story.

The guy is a victim he never says no and what guy with a divorce on going is not gonna get his lawyer to read a move home order? gets a 1 for just not being a good read and the male character just taking it, and her for being a bitch.

and sometimes a beautiful weed appears, TK U MLJ LV NV

Your writing is impressive but this time you blew it with the last page. You had a 5 now you got a 3. Call a tow truck.

What the fuck?

Or is there a follow up?

follow up please.

It seems to me that you spent hours preparing a gourmet dish only to throw it out in the garbage when it was done

I knew it

great ending 5 starrs

but a very weak and sloppy ending. He'd have to be brain dead if he didn't realized she loved him after all that.

that ended as they all do. No one has any of the answers they seek. It is a story told a thousand ways and always ends the same. Who loves you, baby? It seems it is the guys who love, and those who love the most get hurt more often than not.

Will graduated first in his class but was too stupid to think how stupid it would be to hear only snippets of a conversation and act on them...?

Larry desperately wants a child now that he can't have one and is too stupid to think a woman he dumped on might lie to him and try to force legal action against her requiring DNA work on the child...?

Her father forces her to date some guy and is too stupid to think it might have BEEN that guy who got his daughter pregnant...?

Peyton has sex with a guy twice in spite of having hated it the first time and figures there must be some phermonal activity going on with him then sees that he still has that kind of effect on another woman but STILL is too stupid to keep herself from being alone in a room with him...???

I read this story which isn't too bad in a sort of "don't take me too serious" fashion but am too stupid to just treat it like that...???? =)

Why do most of your male characters have to be idiots? They make the same mistake again and again without ever learning from it.

Divorcing someone because they cheat on you is logical. Overhearing something and acting before you have any facts or evidence is moronic. Divorcing your wife because she said someone else's name during sex is a bit of an overreaction. Should you be pissed? Yes. Divorce her? That's a bit much.

The way this story ended (if this could really be considered an ending) ruined what could have been a fine story. Too bad I wasted so much of my morning only to be left like this. There needs to be a category for stories with no real ending to warn readers ahead of time. I guess there's no way to warn the reader about bolt out of the blue, makes no sense, crap endings.

Great up to the feeble, weak-assed ending. A strong ending on either side would have been far better than the wimpy whisper of an ending...

When he asked how she'd feel if he called Kathy's name while they were making love, and she said she'd be badly hurt, he never asked what would she do about it, and I'm sure she'd say she wouldn't leave him over it.

End the story!

All that ending shows is that Larry could hear about the baby,catch her alone and fuck her.

For sure really. After the scene where she talked him out of charging Will where she started removing her clothes , A short while later she said his name at a time when she should have been Ultra Will,they just got back together.

Then there is Will being changed from a decisive no holds character into an emasculated semi cuck in like the last few paragraphs after being a rock all throughout the whole story.

Very unMustang

is much better.

Will is a prick for using girls as "practice". Karma usually takes care of itself in the long run.

I'm sorry, but given how she feels about Larry, even after spending an hour in his hospital room, I find it hard to believe that she would call out his name in the throws of passion after 9 years.

Finally a man as stupid as SS06's women. This guy should run far and fast away from this woman or he'll be raising 2 children that are not his. After a few minutes in a hospital room with this guy, she's taking her blouse off??? She is just another one of his whores. Run, Run, Run.

I hate multiple fucking endings and from what someone commented I KNOW I would hate the other one. Too much angst in this story, it left a bad taste in my mouth. I guess it is a sign of some sort of weakness to get so tied up in a story you are reading. So, I know that I would have really not liked the other ending. Well, on to the next story, I am reading down the page although I did skip the one on Transformers, not my style although I did not even look at it. Too many stories that appeal to me. Thank you for writing, Stang.