All Comments on 'Who Can You Really Trust?'

Scorpio, I have to say that this was a truly delightful tale of well-planned and implemented revenge. As you know I am a long time advocate of castration with a rusty knife but I can also appreciate it when you give us a punishment more suiting the crime, inflicting public humiliation but no physical pain. Other writers could learn from this! Another great one SCORPIO, keep them cumming! Pete.

wow this just sooooo bad so silly so high school like................

lets review this TURD of a story...

Wife goes nuts sexually.... at a Fair/ carnival she takes off her Pants shows her pussy and ass to the public without any hesistancy at all.. then there is the halter tops......... all the while they are suppose to be a good CHRISTIAN couple?

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Hey I loathe the religious right as much as any of you but come on!!!!......Then at a party ANN dances with a few guys who get in a fight over which one of them will screw her...............................

THEN and only then does the Husband wonder is there are ANY limits?.............. um well like arent religious christians suppose to be like um conservative?

note how the author has the hubby reveal the PARTY event on page 3 ... and says it was a few months ago.. which meant it occurred when ANN was going wild in public....................................

but rather than tell of all these events/ incidents in Chronolgical order the author realizes his story would look even more unbelieveable than it already is!!.................. then there is the revenge. This is just another form of the plot idea where the wife gets caught and husband lets 20 guys fuck her.

The story had various elements but mostly a mentally ill woman who is married to a man who loves her. Instead of a vasdectomy he should have gotten her a mental doctor to straighten out her head, six months indeed. Would imagine during that six months she was already screwing the minister and didnt need hubby. The public humiliation thing could have gotten hubby arrested as well as the other wife. He was kinda stupid for letting things go on so long especially as her mental illness was so evident, maybe he was just waiting for the chance to have a bit of the ministers wife.

Only question not answered is how many other mentally ill women was the minister administering to. For every cheating man there has to be at least one if not more cheating women. Yes I define a single woman screwing a married man as cheating, both he and she. Adultry is adultry.

A lovely tale. If only he could have forced his whore wife and Reverend Mike to eat each other's shit it would have been PERFECT.

so if i'm to understand this right, he is trading an adulteress wife for one who it appears would have been willing to commit adultery except for the fact he told her 'no.' i have to assume that he is such a stud that otherwise the minister's wife would never have been tempted. therefore, he can trust her explicitly and will never have to worry about her kissing and desiring another man. i think i've got it now, i understand. a fan always.

Great Sex & Great Payback.

Stupid slut-wife & the studly minister; both deserved to be humiliated and divorced. Of course by this point, "Ann" would most likely enjoy the three college guys and is ready to become the frat house whore.

To the "reconcillation at any costs idiots" - do you as a group presume these couples can get back together and live happily everafter? Come on, and create some wimp/forgiving slut story & post it.

As always, this author is extremely entertaining and this rates in the top ten for decent revenge on the cheating spouses. Thank you for your efforts!

Mike and Ann had it coming to each of them when Ann bought that skirt in that fair and said it was $50.00 she could have gotten it cheaper at WalMart to save Pete money

Pat

But he was right on the money this time. This was a turd in the punch bowl.

No one.

Boyd

Your story was basically too far out in left field on the revenge and unknown wife was a hidden tramp of a story to really be enjoyed by most. Well at least me.

Sorry

-Risq

Stupid stupid stupid - Shakespeare pretty much set the bar with Othello - which has not been read, or even heard of, by most "revenge" authors on this list

The only revenge stories worth reading are where there are deviations from the standard line - none here - why do I read them? Once in a great while an author has something new, or delivers the old especially well. Not today

Very good job.

Sure it was a stretch but in fairness all things are possible - maybe or surely in the end.

Thanks Author

"revenge" is not really just about the wronged tying up the wrong-doers and have them suck each other in a semi-public place, for humiliating purposes.

assuming, of course, that that is LEGALLY possible/doable.

it's totally unbelievable that the wronged, respective spouses could do that, stayed in that hotel room, and directed all that, have dozens if not hudreds of passers by look into it, laughed, and such and NO POLICE or hotel/motel personnel would come in.

slipping the clerk a $50, sure! it's total nonsense.

and, STILL HAVE TIME to go home, close accounts, file for divorce, and buy zig-zagging airline tickets to Seatle?????????????

complete nonsense.

now, on the other hand, if (1) that coersive BDSM (done by the two wronged spouses) was done quickly (even if it's legally wrong and the police was called later by hotel management and the wronged spouses were, YES, made to go to court, THEN, yes, it'd be believeable)

and

(2) AT THE END OF THE DAY Anne and Mike the preacher came crawling back to their spouses, begging for forgiveness, realizing that for them (Anne and Mike), each other was NOT really the right person after all ---- once the sex turned soiled, ugly, and degraded --- then it'd make sense.

at THAT POINT, the wronged husband and the wronged wife (the preacher's wife, who seemed, like Peter, to be upstanding, loving, faithful, and trustworthy) COULD THEN TURN AROUND and say,

"You know what?, I talk to strangers all the time, but not about personal feelings and other such intimate things. Since you are a stranger to me, you will have to excuse me if I don't want to talk to you about such things, or hear you tell me about your thoughts..." and just WALK AWAY...

it'd be really nice to see the wronged woman and man sit down, exchange thoughts about the past and the future and wonder whether they would have what it takes to move away from the nightmares to start afresh, by each other's side?, etc., etc. that would make the story more believable, yes,,, but not the zig-zagging, stealth airplane flights to rendezvous at another city, all the while the cheating spouses were still tied up in their hotel room for passersbys to see and gawk at,,, that's too freakin' silly!

Reading this was like watching a drunk walk a straight line. Your style was choppy, acerbic, and distracting; and yet I Liked the story. Well, I liked most of the story. Your conclusion was so way over the top that I have to downgrade my rating. I think you gave up on how to resolve the problem and rushed the ending.

Pete and Betsy wimped out. They shoulda doused Ann and Mike with gasoline and set them on fire. That's fair, ain't it? I think you should do a thorough job in whatever you undertake and it was really disappointing to see such wimps in action.

Not much of a tale as far as I can see. The writing is average at best and the characters not worthy of comment.

Here's a 25 because it's a Thursday.

It used to be the iconic battle cry of what they used to call in previous decades ‘the angry white male’. Namely, the repressed white male who finally found his voice in the midst of every one else presumably finding their voices. In saying: finding his voice we should not be too literal. That revelation at least as portrayed in contemporary art was not always most civilized.

Today’s posters (in this section in particular) of Lit. On the other hand (including me), have no such problems. I can imagine why the behavior of this husband would seem pretty incredible to us lot. But that common poster (again, including me) is still not the only representing type of common American males in this diverse common wealth of sub cultures.

In fact, the quiet introvert highly unexpressive white male used to be considered the typical American male up to two or thee decades ago. Silent as can be. They still do exist. It’s not that they never talk, they are just introverts. They accommodate, and they work hard. And they want to hold to the status quo as much as possible.

Coming back to the story, from this husband perspective, there is no direct evidence to any infidelity. All he observes is “just” changes in the patterns of her behavior. Those changes come after a traumatic loss for both of them followed by highly stressful period of efforts to keep the marriage together. But even after they seemed to have salvaged the marriage, the husband pretty much kept acting as if he was walking on egg shells, trying to keep her happy, in the marriage without any of them reaching a breaking point. He made it clear that he is uncomfortable with her ‘new take on sexuality’ as he tried and presumably temporarily succeeded to come to an understanding with her.

Yes, he could have drawn the line much closer to his comfort level. No more trashy behavior. Without the wisdom of hindsight, he probably figured at the time that such request would cost him his marriage.

One more fact the quiet accommodating – read repressed/in denial type as this husband seemed to have been up to a point would be an ideal candidate to snap. At that point (of snapping)you start acting in most untypical manner. To the world you could look cool and calculating (they don’t all scream and talk incoherently as many movies portray). But the script in their mind while possibly coherent to the person himself could be extreme cruel and to the outsider may be viewed as incomprehensible. (that’s why getting them to talk and hear their internal narrative is so important). Put those elements together and the scenario we have seen does not seem so incredible (at least to me) anymore. The husband was under strain and frustration to preserve the marriage for a long time. Things seem to have gone on the right course but then veered out of control as wife’s behavior kept changing and becoming more and more overtly promiscuous. Ask any professional – they would tell you she is asking for help. To their bad luck (It’s a ‘pay back’ story not reconciliation - take the genre or leave it). The author did not provide either of them additional therapists at that later stage of the plot. As thing get out of control it’s the husband turn to get into his funk. You think that when he snapped this kind of revenge is unrealistic? You are wrong. The orchestration of the minutia: (could management have called police or not could have been better) But it does not change much. With armed altercations police could have still avoided any intervention w/out a psychologist. But the main point represented by the scene remains credible anyway. The enormity of the rage by a person who finally snaps combined with loosing any inhibitions could and does make for pretty spectacular scenes. If anything this is a relatively tame outcome. The adulterous couple was very lucky to have come out alive and in one piece (if you get my gist).

I did not get the sense that the wife of the minister was a slut waiting to happen as one poster claimed. You can feel attracted to someone and not act on it. I also do not think that either the husband or the wife behavior is reflecting on any type of church or religion, men and women can ‘loose it’ psychologically across all lines of religions and professions. I am not claiming that clergy is like any other kind of profession, but they are humans. We must make a distinction between what the narrator, in the form of the husband perceives as some of his personal lessons for the future (arguably anti –the establishment of the church), and what the implied author of the story suggests. There is no doubt that the narrator is highly unreliable after all he is the repressed husband which snapped, shall we take the observation of this character as one and the same as those of the implied author (the authority upon which we can put all the responsibilities of putting together of this one particular story)? I don’t think so. After all he is the one who sent the husband to snap and I can’t see any evidence beyond the statements of the husband that would indicate any hostility to the church(how about the minister’s wife, She was equally wronged by this couple, or any person who could have been on the husband and the minister’s wife side. As a practical matter, I feel that it in fact it’s not such a bad idea for the husband to go to a separate e church than his new wife. One less thing for him to worry about.

I felt that the story could have been shorter on the details, but as another poster said somehow at the end, since all of the narrative came from the POV of the husband it helped build his apathetic somewhat slow temperament and at the end helped me believe why this kind of a guy would be the ideal candidate to pick up a gun and do what he did. In a clumsy sort of way it all came out right...

the characters were too stiff where they went through the motions but where were the emotions? Of course, the revenge was way off the top. Just because Ann cheats on him he should not fall into the moral gutter. No Christian would ever condone Pete and Betsy's actions. Just think about it.

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Pull a gun on his wife? Force her to swallow Mike's pee? Force her to fuck other men? What was her crime? She fell in love with Mike. Note she did not say that she was in lust with him or fucking other men. Ann just fell out of love with Pete. Now this is where the plot gets weak. There was no indication that either Mike or Ann loved each other nor did Mike try to defend Ann when they were caught. What was Ann's reason after all these years of knowing Mike to suddenly fall in love with him. What did Pete do to lose her? What did Betsy do to lose Mike?

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Then we have the crazy ending when the cheated upon spouses run off to cheat prior to the divorce. Obviously the love for their spouse vanished overnight and the love for each other suddenly appeared. Why didn't the police arrest Pete and Betsy?

Bottom Line: There was no basis for these changes. They just happened. So, the story was too unrealistic for a real life drama and not very entertaining (rather sad actually) for a fantasy.

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SleeplessinMD

As far as judging the credibility of the characters this is up to each reader’s interpretation. My response is to the first part of your comments. You should be making the distinction between the particular characters; their behaviors; their mental states; code of behavior, and that of the implied author – the latter being the total sum of all the information gathered by the story. IMO It could not be said that the author chooses the husband to be his or the story’s messenger as far as the”lesson of the story”. In most modern stories the meeting point of the circumstances which the plot throws at the particular characters and their interactions with each other, and after giving into account TOGETHER can get you to the approximated message of the story. In this case the plot puts a particular type of a person in certain conditions where he acts in a way which may is could not acceptable by most moral code of conducts. But the story prepared us with extensive details as it followed the down ward spiral of his life. It is consistent with familiar patterns of high distress and response to overwhelming crisis. It certainly is not something that anyone wishes upon oneself at anytime. This kind of behavior (and worse) does happen. For sure, you must realize that the author does not automatically stand behind any one particular character in his/her stories.

Does your critique of the story in this regard means that this kind of bad times in people’s lives should not be describes because people do deviate at times from the morally prescribed behavior? How boring could that be?

oh you are so masterful...little man...i'm finding harder and harder to critique the stories. bah.

believe yourself at least half the time. You marry a spouse and become one. Trust is essential, this is the only person you really put yourself and your life totally in their hands. If that person ever does anything that makes you question their actions or behavior, who destroys any degree of the trust that marriage for all intents and purposes is over. The best revenge is to sue for adultry in the divorce and name names. The little macho games dont really make sense and who wants to go to prison because your mate is untrustworthy? Nope being stupid isnt being smart. You will be angry but try to control and channel that anger into providing you with the weapons you need to insure a divorce that cost the other as much as possible. That is revenge. It is especially nice when the other person is married and you name the names and they come out in the divorce.

All of your stories are very well done. I don't like all of them, but that's taste. The facts that you have story, can spell, and can use grammar properly make for very enjoyable reading. Thank you for your work !!!

You stated that the wife committed no crime. In actually in the US it was and may still be true in most states there were statutes that made adultry a crime. Additionally there were, and still may be laws against fornication, fucking, with someone not your spouse. And in almost all states, at least until recent years, laws that made adultry a justifiable reason for divorce. An alienation of affection suits are still conducted in many states. In many states signing into hotel/motel rooms under assumed names, including as husband and wife if you arent is illegal. And some states even have laws such as one that Texas had that said if you signed into a hotel/motel as husband and wife you were commonlaw married, that creates ar real set of interesting questions. So waht crime did they commit, depends on where you live, and in what time period.

Unfortunately I found that there was a little too much

sexual elaboration without sexual tension. That gets a

boring.

As usual they had not considered what they should do if

they got caught because it would never happen to them.

This was one of the most confusing, rambling stories I have ever read. It makes absolutely no sense at all. She goes from conservative faithful wife to exhibitionist adulterous in the blink of an eye. Then husband gets revege by having them pee in each others mouth. Please, give us a break. When everyone agrees with Harryin Va you know the story is terrible.

the Ct. Yankee

That's because below is used to wimp husband stories where he just walks away when he sees his wife fucking another man or takes it all out on her and lets the man slide. You did it up right and humiliated the cheating couple the way cheating couples should be treated...KUDOS TO YOU>>>marriedwithballs@yahoo.com

they didn't handle it all very well to start, and pete and betsy finished it for them. the infidelity and disloyalty and most unchristian behavior came back on them

Sleezeball assholes call themselves ministers and proceed to screw all the women and sometimes boys that foolishly follow then.

I'd trust an atheist any day before I'd trust a "man" of god. At least the atheist won't lie to me every time the talk to about their beliefs.

where he might hear 'All have sinned."

Or 'When you judge another you condemn yourself since you're doing the same thing.'

And how he would hate to hear the words of Jesus to the woman about to be stoned for adultery "I don't condemn you. Don't do it again."

Or 'Judgement without mercy to those who show no mercy."

He would probably choke if asked to read the words of saint Paul 'Jesus came into the world to save sinners, of whom I am the worst."

I think the husband put up with an awful lot with his wife. I suffered the pain of the miscarriage. He did without sex for 6 months. He got the vasectomy at her demands. He endured her acting like trash, then the final humiliation of the Minister, his best friend screwing her. I felt his reactions when he caught them realistic. Maybe not mine...I probably would have just left with Betsy like he did. Hard to tell.

any one else is a wild ass guess. TK U MLJ LV NV

The answer to your question: "Who can you really trust?" is as follows - DON'T TRUST A LIVING ASS AND WALK CAREFULLY AMONG THE DEAD!

I know it's fiction, but it sure is unreal. I couldn't finish reading.

not believable and too far out.

Over dinner Ann shared with me that Betsy had shared with her that Mike had lost both testicles in an accident and that she had only one ovary.

So just how does Mike get hard for Ann and how does Ann lick his balls as Betsy demands? It's little mistakes like this that can get overlooked by an author.

Another cheating wife tale !

I thought the husband would BTB more as I think she got off lightly !

Good story up to the end.

people aren't trust worthy, politicians, ministry, lawyers, judges, city, county, state, and federal employed of all walks of life.

why we are nothing more than a 3rd world country as corrupt as the countries

we insist on policing and imposing our will on them.

sentimentality expressed in so many LW stories puts you head and shoulders above the rest.

The first part of this story was very well developed. It was obvious that the miscarriage had a significant psychological effect on her. This would have had more depth if you had developed this further at the end. The two cheaters disappeared at the end. Would have liked to know the fallout from their actions.

pity she lost the baby but forcing him to have the snip job before she would have sex again was just not on but then she turned in to a wild cheating slut....loved the way they humiliated them both in the hotel and got strangers to fuck her.....after that they both got well and truly fucked in the divorces and then him and Betsy got together and hopefully having the snip job reversed he was able to get her pregnant. Cheating sluts and so called Christians belong in the gutter....nice story of revenge

His cheating wife was fucked by 3 guys...she should become pregnant...that the perfect end...

Two fucking cheating assholes. One a married minister. Hopefully their ex-spouses live happily ever after.

Between "forth" & "fourth." Not that that would have saved this drek.

agree with other comments. it's really bad.

I did and gave it a 5

As is prior anon. Would be a "0" if they existed.

Yourself. For Sure. I Hope. TK U MLJ LV NV

How stupid do you have to be to not know that exhibitionist behavior is displaying to attract a new mate? Hopefully, he learned from this, and won't be such a pussy in the future.

Very strange

Her behavior was not even close to normal long before he caught her screwing around on him. Crazy wife, never a loving wife.

But spending every waking hour of every freaking day reading and pontificating on a fuck story site is "normal?"

Get a clue you friggin closet case - and don't talk about "normal" anymore.

I don't condone cheating, but the story was a bit much, in more than one way.

First, the punishment heaped on the cheaters was a little "crazy", and second,

no man with any balls is going to stand still for that kind of humiliation, he would

rather die trying to get out of it. I know I would.

But if I were to submit to that kind of punishment and was allowed to walk away,

there is no place on earth those who humiliated me could hide that I couldn't

find them, and punish them. Terminally.

The ending was surprising, because I thought this was going in an entirely different direction. It's not that the author intended a surprise ending, but rather that the storyline was not tight. In the beginning I suspected we were headed toward an affair with the pastor. In that respect, the author remained true to the title and the opening of the story. However, it's the in between that confused me, and maybe even lead me to be disappointed with this one. I began to think she would start pushing for an open marriage. Her behavior was indicating that. Picking up on that would have made this a more intriguing story. You even set up the reader by having the discussion where she negotiates rules. Instead, it settled into a simple I've fallen in love with someone else. No emotional struggle, no fighting for the marriage. Just a goodbye and some revenge.

You reduce husbands to mere vassals who have to "fight" to keep the interest of their Lady. We already know she doesn't love him and yet you would impose your sick world and life view on all husbands. I would suspect that you have never experienced the pain and anguish of betrayal or, you are a woman so caught in her need to find herself and reach self-fulfillment that you totally discount the value of the man you latched onto to support you.

Reconciliation is possible but fighting for the marriage is a pipe dream. If he has to fight, if there is no remorse, THERE IS NO MARRIAGE and probably never was.

According to the story, he wasn't a man with balls. They said he lost both to an accident. Of course he wouldn't be performing sexually if that were true. What was the truth?

5* for originality, even though it was sick (I like sick).

they paid the cheating assholes back but doubt they would have got away with letting men rape her while tied up...the idea is good but far too fanciful

Unlikable characters, stilted storyline, disjointed conversations.....you've written better.

The details lack your usual clarity. Minister Mike and slut wife fell off the grid. I actually know a preacher's wife that was having sex with other men, including members of her church. And I personally know a preacher with five children who had an affair with a female member of his congregation because his own wife had had major surgery and no longer had any sexual desires. He had to step down as pastor.

So. Preacher Mike nails Ann, Pete's wite. Pete gets Betsy, Preacher Mike's wife.Ann is a little, make that alot, cuckoo after losing the baby. What are the odds. And Betsy and Mike just happen to love each other, figure the odds.

Took 4 pages to get to the cheating/revenge, much of it was boringly redundant. Only a 3

....more than unadulterated garbage. It is clumsily written, the characters are developed on one pathway then used on another. Confusing dialogue and unlikely scenarios. Certainly not one of this writer's best. One strained star.

A lot of words to get to a decent revenge end. What happened to the cheaters?

Wow, that’s one severe revenge. They deserved it, but who thinks of the restraints and pissing in mouths?

Kind of surprised that nobody called the cops, or talked enough that word spread to the cops. Cheaters or not, that’s unlawful restraint. In some states it might be kidnapping.

I love a good payback story.

No way in hell it could happen that way but it was a joy to read.

No way this would happen; but it was a fun read!!! I would have divorced Ann before I got snipped!!!! Ann definitely has serious mental issues!!!

But Guess what a news flash recently had a minister arrested over fucking another mans wife they were planning to murder him for some reason or other so isn't truth stranger than fiction.

Karma would be Ann getting pregnant from one of the young guys. Mike rejecting her because of the disgusting things they were made to do and how much she enjoyed the young dudes. Ann ended up a single mother in a trailer park, never knowing who the father was. Betsy and Pete had a very nice life with their three kids.

Reading again after it came up in randoms. Good story, but needs epilogue covering the future of Mike and Ann.

I just can't see spending all that time and trouble to humiliate two people who showed they have no honor, no decency, and no character. Get them out of your life and move on. That's all they deserve. Good story, but they aren't worth the trouble.

The rabbi/minister fucking another man's wife happens a lot FYI

How did they get restraining orders?

Takes some skill to have an over-the-top punishment like that, and make it seem boring. Story went off the rails halfway through and dived straight off a cliff.

Ridiculous, started well but got lost halfway through.

Sometimes the search for revenge diminishes the wounded parties. This is one of those times.

Most ministers are Not counselors!

Why not see a grief counselor right after she cuts you off?

Your MC is stupid, idiotic,and all derogatory words you can think of

I'm glad you told us in the beginning that this was a work of fiction and that's what we got. It took so many turns we got lost a couple of time.

Well, that was bizarre.

Unbelievably stupid.

While the revenge was fun, I just can’t believe they went to church again. Kinda a 1 bitten twice shy thing. 5 stars for a great story. DMW aka Sumnut96

As many have said it's over the top, I liked the plot but think it ran away from you in the revenge bit,