All Comments on 'XXL Pt. 02'

I love your stories. This may be your best.

As I said in part 01, great characters. As “they” say, the difference between comedy and tragedy is the ending. Sweet story.

Nicely done, sir. Thank you for sharing your talent.

Good story. I enjoyed reading, and rooting for Richard and Mandy!

When I see your authors name in the list, I know I’m going to read some very fine material. You have a wonderful way of getting your thoughts and stories across. I appreciate your development of the characters and the storylines.

Looking forward to your next adventure.

Ya know some btb endings are appropriate especially if those involved are extremely deserving. But there it is just something satisfying about a story we're even if the family goes their separate ways that they all end up happy in the end. The only issue I have is that the two that get off ruining others families didn't get any pay back. Thank you very well written as usual I look forward to your next story.

Looking forwards to your next offerings. I always enjoy reading your stuff.

Fat women, bladders, food etc. Impossible to follow.

Thanks for sharing a great story.

For some stories, there should be 6 stars. This is one of THOSE stories. Thank you for your contribution to what is fast becoming. a somewhat less than mediocre catagory.

Wish could quote more than 5*

Thank you for the yarn.

JimBob44 is able to bring into focus the invisible people are struggling just to get through the day. Thanks for writing. 5*

You had Mary Beth act like a crazy person rather than the selfish bitch she really was. She did everything absolutely wrong while Richard did everything right. Both situations are statistically impossible.

As such, the story devolved into a farce of Wile E. Coyote proportions. I could almost see the truck carrying Acme Husband Capturing supplies show up with an elaborate plan that results in an anvil dropping on her head. Although that might have been an improvement to this.

I have enjoyed most of your stories and despite you giving everybody across this nation a Cajun accent. As I read this chapter I ran into a major road block when you wrote 'Cabrini High School had been happy to welcome Richard Trahan on their staff.' Later you wrote that Mandy moved to DeGarde to be closer to Richard. Then you wrote 'Amanda managed to get a job at St. Pious, in the cafeteria. Her work day started at ten in the morning and ended at one in the afternoon. At first, she started visiting Camille after getting off of work.' That my friend had to be the longest commute in history.

as shit

You are usually fairly spot on in your criticisms, but y'all wrong as fuck this time. You didn't like the first chapter, what the hell made you think you would like chapter two? Next time quit while you are ahead.

Love the story, great!

like the whole side story you created at the end about richard's son stealing a wife away because of the musings of two serial shit stirrers that ruined richard's marriage. you kept foreshadowing that richard's son was a chip off the ol' block. but cheating wasn't in richard, and then the story went nowhere. it literally went nowhere. she cheated, divorced the hubby, shacked up with rich's son....and then that's all folks?

the two cackling man-haters got no real justice, and rich's son shows at least one major character trait that is very un-richard like. but that did foreshadow the ending....which is to say it meandered and went nowhere. i'm not saying it was bad or contradictory, but it was confusing and weird. you could have ended it with rich's young teen squeeze professing her love and fade to black. that about sums up everything relevant. you mention that mary-beth briefly moved on easily enough, but that was very much expected. once again....weird. not bad...just odd.

Under the fingernails of every character in this redneck misery fest. One star.

So she's 200+ pounds at 20 ? There's a pretty fair chance the scale reads 3. bills in 15 years, that's not even mentioning type 2 diabetes that usually accompanies that scale of obesity. Sorry about leading with the body shaming, but coming from family of large framed individuals, I know a thing or two about this issue. Most of clan works out , thank God, but those that put calorie blinders on have serious health challenges . Nuff said bout that.

As for the story ? Jimbob44 crumbled the cookie in surprising and artful ways in terms of conclusion. Extreme characters took a harrowing look in mirror and moderated their ways. It was confusing with scads of POVs to monitor as reader , but if author brings ' A' game , then its the price of admission. I wouldn't say the is pinnacle of this author's ability but even so this effort stands clearcut head and shoulders above the rank and file journeyman scribes on site.

Bottom Line (s): Tale took off a tad slow like Usain Bolt usual notorious nonchalant start in 100 yard dash , then ramping up in middle, smooth as silk, to win by stride (sometimes two) over hapless competition.

Full marks *****

...the militant lesbians would get their due, but characters don't always get what's coming to them, and that's one of the things I appreciate about your stories. 5 stars.

Dude you need to see a therapist or just stop writing this drivel where you are the wronged man and you get revenge on the evil woman. Seriously, you have to move on with your life.

FYI, you have the wrong high school name in LA. I enjoyed the first part more because the 2nd had the usual divorce stuff, but it was redeemed by Mary Beth changing her life around and Mandy’s comment that if she went to college she’d be a lonely shoe seller. The issue with the 2nd part is that Richard’s personality disappears.

While this may be Fiction, it reads & feels as if it was a Biography of a actual person.

Well Done.

Were drvin’, we were along for the ride...didn’t always like some of the twists & turns but you got us to the destination. Nice job.

Really enjoyed the story. Thanks for the read.

Enjoyed both 1 & 2. After reading part 1, I was looking forward to see where you took the characters in part 2 and was not disappointed

Thank you for yet another great story. A flower laden rose bush on the compost heap that Loving Wives has sadly become.

. . . but just jumped around too much.

Good work JimBob. Gave it 5.

Very nice tale of rural America as seen through your eyes - thanks for the story!

5Stars Jimbob. Very well done. You should , if you dont have some novels written

Thanks for the truth, which is always better than fiction. This truly is how people

function in our world. Thanks for sharing your pleasure.... J

Well, it ended on a less dismal note than CH1. JimBob is always a breath of fresh tannic acid and swamp gases ... and that, if not a pleasnt thing, is at least an honest and good thing! (‘ceptin the skeeters and “no see’ems!”)

5*

And an very entertaining read.

Thanks JimBob

5*

I always enjoy your stories and this one was certainly entertaining.

I liked your characters and the way you develop them. The plot was good and kept my interest from start to finish and I enjoyed the finale!

Thank you!

And ignore the disease of this site - HIV, he is so full of himself he can't stand when others clearly share great, enjoyable reading!!

He was, at one time, an editor, don't you know, and is therefore an expert in all things literature (in his own mind).

I like the Cajun dialect in your tales, and the humor.

I honestly don't know what people see in this? First of all there are too many characters that you introduce in random ways. Combine that with all the jumping around and it becomes very tedious to read. I finally gave up. Oh well, you got your fans, I'm just not one of them.

but it was pretty damn good as it is. Wish I had the time and energy to give you detailed analysis, but I think you already know 90% of what I might suggest.

I get it was not your focus, but I was really intrigued what could turn Mary Beth into such a failure as a wife and mother. How can Richard bitch so fervently about the failure of his children, when he subsidized, funded, their failure? You even had the kids turn it around, mostly, when Mary Beth finally shut down the enabling and appeasement of the kids. What might have happened if Richard had done the same thing, sooner, before their marriage reached critical mass and melted down? I felt he was way too passive and defeatist, noting the slow steady swirl of this family going down the toilet since their child died. Maybe it couldn't have been saved, but it was like he just kept on doing his thing while the boat slowly took on water and headed for the bottom.

So it was a very well written and interesting story about some really sad self destructive people. Once Mandy starts having their own children Richard will now remember why people tend to marry other people within their age range. You could write it anyway you choose, but in the real world its going to be half assed at best, and probably a miserable failure. Richard better get an appointment with the bishop before the fake priest accuses him of molesting some of the students to get him fired.

Yeah, lots of material left here for a sequel. Hope someone has the time and energy to write it.

Thanks again for a great story.

JimBob44,

This is the type of story that brings me back to Lit. Thank You.

I agree with BigGuy that the evil lesbians didn't get any retribution. Otherwise everybody seems to end up about where they should be. Five stars.

Curiously sweet, like most of JB44's stories. The only really mean one, in which a guy destroys a family, including completely innocent young people, is his least successful.

Fine storytelling and interweaving of a lot of moving parts.

Sho ain’t getten no 4 Stars, ‘cause I kin give it 5.

the second half of this story was pretty good.

Funny how Mary Beth didn't notice that the kids were spoiled as long as it was Richard that had to pay the price for spoiling them.

Rebecca was a slob? So now Jackie's fastidious? So why did she live like a slob when living in her parents's house? Her sheets are sticky? So wash them!

Why the detour into Noelle and Chrissie breaking up Jewel and Buddy? I thought you were going to show them getting slapped down! Why did Jewel block them? They "helped" her! Or was she afraid that they might break up her and Andy?

The jumpy narrative was annoying.

Thanks JB44. If a man is not into reading about cucky wimps and slut wives we’ve pretty much only have you to turn to anymore. Your skill set has just gotten better and better

We must be on our way to the trailer park. Two stars for this illiterate crap.

Gotta love how Jim Bob elevates White Trash to fable and lore! He does not just condescend and dismiss. He shows how too many waddle unmindfully to their lowest common denominator—and even lower numerator. How some struggle to rise above the division bar—ever or on occasion—to increase numeration. And how a few use wisdom passed-down, life experience, education, and common sense to improper fractions which can, with more effort, convert into meaningful mixed numbers for transcendence. [Reminiscent of Erskine Caldwell with some Faulknerian spicing.]

This tale hits close to home in that I do volunteer work and see exactly what you ended this story with. So well done....and the rest of the story too! Been a fan for awhile, but you outdid yourself with this one.

very warm, funny with happy ending story. 5 stars

This is the first story I've read in LW in 2 weeks, great story.

Thanks again

Touching writing. LOVED IT

Your usual good finish to the story. With your penchant for recurring characters, maybe we can hope for a future story where Chrissie and Noelle get their deserved comeuppance. I'll be looking for it. Thanks again JB.

Just because you wrote the right things.

In the first part i don t see their you want to go. And now i just say thank you.

But i come from Europ and their it is not nessesary to have a paper to be someone.

But you are right and all over the world their are too many people how don t think about those how dont have. And to me shame i am one of these to.

Didn't really like this one. Like what BigGuy said, that's part of the reason why I love JimBob stories. Anything can happen, but this was way too much. How did the husband put up with all their crap over the years? He was pretty much asking for it.

What happened to Jewel and her "soulmates" claim? That sucked too. Hopefully she kicks Andy out after she realizes what a lazy asshole he really is.

Like someone else pointed out, the mistakes were there too. Some not a big deal, some kinda takes you out of the story a bit. Maybe it was because I didn't love this story that I noticed the errors more.

A lot of the kids lately in your LW stories are terrible. I understand sometimes you can't do anything about it, but sometimes it's just bad parenting.

Continued story of characters

with little sense but lot of emotion.

Learning as they stumble over their mistakes.

Warm and colorful.

Top ratings from me.

I found the first part confusing with too many names. Richard had a wife and family from hell, maybe he should have exerted more authority over his children. I enjoyed the character development as the story got interesting. Someone likes fat ladies. 5*

Mary Beth and the kids were too one-dimensional for most of the series. When they turned themselves around, it was hard to take seriously. Nonetheless, an enjoyable story.

A story of dysfunctional families, and the love of a faithful but not very good father for a little fat girl. She remains a fat girl but has the compassion that is needed everywhere. It was difficult to keep up with all the names in the first part, but that faded away in the latter half. I thought the conflicts were realistic, especially the one about the couch and priest. It's amazing what love can do to someone who is socially unacceptable because of her weight, but whose personality and humanity shows through and brings relief to those who are in need. The story was well written and probably more emotional than anything I've read on this site.

You my friend tell a great story. Thanks for sharing.

and with help from others, life takes on a new chapter, TK U MLJ LV NV

I will roast you before I toast you.

Its Pius and it pisses me off. Camille eats like a fuckin horse. My 80 year old mom splits a melon slice and a piece toast with me and says shes full. Man you went full throttle at the piece before the end and a lot was wasted on some pretty mundane shit.

That said this story was good. I get how a marriage in a slow spiral becomes routine and acceptable. I get how communication becomes more trouble than its worth. The dialect is great. If this had been in Bensonville, AR I think a lot of gripes from readers would have been alleviated. Colorado has some great Spanglish.

Well done sir.

Kind of skirted the age issue but all the good points overshadow that hands down. Once again you make real life come to bear in your stories.

WELL DoNe

My only contempt is your loss of place.

Just after Mandy comes to La., you write that she works at St Pious' cafeteria. St. Pious, however, is back in Co., not La.

Otherwise, a better story now that I'm beginning to understand some of the coon talk you write bout

Smokepole

What made the story so real was Richards thoughts, and even his notes during the mediation. His wit, sarcasm, was reacting the same way I would have. Sure, he let his family walk on him, he was a good man, not a wimp. Age ain't nothing but a number and more cushion for the pushin. Be safe people.

Shouldn’t Tornadough Donut Shop be Tornadeaux Donut Shop?

What I like best about your stories (other than authentic tragedy and believable redemption) is that I hear that coon ass accent out loud when I read it. If you try to read it, it will bog you down like bayou clay, you just have to hear it in your ears.

of Cajun Maugham?

Most of the loving wives stories here are not burn the bitch, and that’s OK with me. It’s enough to see the wrong party suffering, and in some cases growing up and learning how to live their lives right. If I might make one suggestion it would be to leave the Cajun accent to the Cajuns, because I don’t think most people in Colorado talk like that.

Mom finally got tough with kids

They learned maybe a little serendipitous but story

Enjoyed

Real people, real world issues. Phenomenal writing and engaging characters, This is one of my favorite stories out of your work I've read, and I have enjoyed many of the others. Keep up the great work!

Really liked the characters

I leave more comments about your stories than I do for all the rest on this site put together, and the comment is basically the same every time. Your stories have more humanity in them than anyone else's. I feel I know all these characters in one sense or another. Nearly every character leaves the story better than they enter it, and we end up empathizing with even the (sorta) villains.

You could turn most of your ouvre into something called 'Tales of DeGarde' and probably become a world-famous author, but I feel very privileged to read stuff of this quality on a free site. Unbelievable.

excellent5*

Maybe Mary beth should go over and eat all that the high grass

Both parts of this story was fantastic to read. I look forward to reading more from you.

Thank you.

Thank you for having a female who isn't goddess. They talk about blacks getting dumped on. Fat people not only have to put up with all the crap, but they don't have any protection under the law.

Beautiful story - Great character development and story arc. 5*

What a gem! Thank you for a smart story on so many levels. I echo the comments I have read concerning Mandy, your plotting, and especially your usage. I'm starting through your other stories immediately.

You've got the local language and culture down, dude. I enjoy it. But if you can be that faithful to the characters, why not try expanding your abilities? Stretch dude.

That ended so well, really liked that everyone ended up growing as a result of the end of the marriage. So rare in these stories to see characters develop and mature. 5*

What a pleasure is a well written story.

Beautiful. TC Ireland

I got a real hankering for a burger now

Torturous path. Their marriage had gotten poisoned by the tragedies and the lack of partnership and communication. Thought it was weird and borderline moronic that Jewel ditched her "soulmate" for the young Andy (with little to no future as a bank teller) because the two harpies started in on her. Was this to lay off some of the blame for why Mary Beth got seduced? Lot of pain, bad communication, and spoiled kids. Led to a trainwreck and an acrimonious one. The husband was not blameless. Yes the pictures killed whatever sentiment he had for amfamily that by then he had come to despise but he went pretty scorched earth on the wife, leaving her with zero money while she waited for him. Yes she was clearly at fault but their marriage died over many years for a lot of tragic reasons and I doubt in real life that he would be blameless. Good to see some maturity by the characters.

How can anyone hate this story. "You ain't small, but God damn, you sure are sexy." A woman doesn't have to be a size 6 for a man to love her.

Oooh this part is amazing. Way way way way better than the first part (honestly, I wish the author just combined them together). Easy 5 stars

I been to Colorado, didn't meet a single person there the talked like a Cajun from Louisiana.

Good writing even with the annoying speech.

Amazing story telling ability. 5*.

Nice story. Could have been longer

A nice, if short, wrap up to this storyline. It was interesting to notice the complete loss of Cajun speech after relocating to Louisiana. Still a solid 4 Star ⭐ rating.

Might be the ex-wife was the only character in the story with any character.

Loved it. Thanks.

To quote a bubbly Big Band leader of yore "wunnerful, wunnerful".

Tis a 5! Some of JB44's stories are junk, some are good, some are excellent but this one - he knocked out of the ballpark. I think the weight angle is a bit overdone but since the office secretary has to rewrite every tech report I hand her I think I'll keep my mouth shut ......

Great story; but please correct PIOUS to PIUS.