A Slightly Different Marriage

"I don't know Sam. I'm not comfortable with it and I'm going to have to think on it."

I did think about it and the bottom line was that I had been trusting Sam all along so there didn't seem to be any reason for not trusting her in what she wanted to do and so I gave her my permission.

Over the next eight months Sam hooked up with a guy, kept him for three or four weeks and then dropped him. In the second month she did start seeing her new guy about twice a week and then twice a week became the norm.

At home nothing changed. Well I guess that wasn't really so. One thing changed and it surprised both Sam and me. The thoughts about what Sam was doing started getting to me and turning me on. I was so wound up one night that when she came home I grabbed her, bent her over the back of the couch and took her from behind. It happened a couple of more times and then Sam stopped taking showers as soon as she got home and before getting in bed with me. She would suck my cock, but I wouldn't go down on her. I drew the line at that.

And then......

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It was the eighth month since she started doing the same guy for weeks at a time and one Thursday night Sam surprised me by asking if I would mind terribly if she went away for a weekend with her current boyfriend. She had never done that before. I'd thought she was almost done with him since she had never stayed with one of her lovers for more than four weeks and this guy was going on five. I didn't answer her right away and she quickly told me to never mind, but I knew she would spend the whole weekend pouting and being in a pissy mood so I told her to go ahead. The tone of my voice told her how I really felt about it, but it didn't stop her from going.

I spent a very bad weekend thinking about Sam and what she was doing and she still wasn't home when I went to bed Sunday night. When she did get home she was so quiet that she didn't wake me up and she was sound asleep when I got up to go to work in the morning.

Sam managed to avoid me for the next two days and it wasn't until Thursday that we talked. She apologized for her behavior and asked me to forgive her. She knew I wasn't happy with her spending the weekend with her toy, but it was something that she felt she had to do. She was getting ready to dump him because he was starting to get possessive, but she wanted one last time with him. It seems that he had a very large cock. Bigger than anything she had ever seen before and she doubted that she would ever see one that big again and she wanted one last full and stuffed feeling. She promised that she would never do it again.

What could I say? I'm the one who opened the door to all of it so it was mostly on me. I don't know what Sam saw on my face, but whatever it was she misread it and she got up and ran from the room crying. I followed her up to the bedroom and tried to get her to stop crying and tell me what was wrong. It took me a while to get her quieted down and then she said, "I'm sorry. I know I've ruined it for us. I know you hate me for going off on that weekend" and then she started crying again and I couldn't get her to stop. I decided to let things be until she could talk without crying.

The next night we sat down when I got home from work and hashed things out. She felt that she had let me down and that now I wouldn't trust her any more. I was honest with her and told her that I did indeed feel that she had let me down. I told her that the concept of letting her have her fun was based on her always coming home to me and that her weekend getaway actually had me wondering if I hadn't lost her. I told her that I had actually wondered if she would be coming home from her weekend. At that she burst out crying and ran up to the bedroom. I didn't follow and when I went up to go t bed she was already asleep. The next morning she work me up with a blow job, told me that I would never have to worry about her coming home to me and that she would never again give me reason to doubt her.

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After that came two months of Sam not stopping with the people from work and she had gotten back to the irritable and pissy stage. Her 'infamous' weekend was still on my mind so I didn't say:

"For Christ's sake go out and get laid and stop being a miserable bitch!"

Finally she asked if I would mind if she stopped after work with the crew. After a moments hesitation that I'm sure that she noticed I said that it would be okay with me. That girl's night out turned out to be different than any of the other previous ones. She did hook up with a 'cute guy' but he was with a group and when the people that Sam worked with had gone she joined the 'cute guy's' group. They left the bar and went to some one's house to continue the party. The next morning she told me:

"I was really, really bad baby. I did three guys at the party. It was a first for me and it was wild."

I wasn't all that happy when I heard that. Letting her play was one thing, but becoming a train puller wasn't what I had in mind when I let her run, but then it was only sex right? She met with her cute guy a couple of more times over the next couple of weeks, but never went to another party, At least not that I knew of.

Sam bonded with a couple of girls at that party with the result being another rocky period in our lives. One Sunday after a lazy afternoon of sitting on the patio drinking margaritas Sam asked:

"Can I ask you for a really huge favor?"

"You can ask, but I won't promise that you will get it. What is it?"

"Don't laugh and don't get pissed at me okay?"

"Go ahead Sam; what is it?"

"I feel guilty about my having my sexual fun while you don't. Actually it's more like I'm uncomfortable knowing that I'm playing outside the marriage and that you don't. I know you say that it is okay and that you don't mind, but I'd feel a lot better if you got yourself a piece of strange. I can't explain it honey, but it just doesn't set well with me and it makes me nervous and uncomfortable. My favor is that I want you to have another woman."

I laughed at that and then said, "Don't think I can do that sweetie. I'm just not the kind of guy who can go out and try to pick up a woman. I wouldn't know how. I mean I never even did that when I was single."

"That's okay. Just say that you will do it and I'll do the rest."

"You'll do the rest?"

"I'll take you to a party and introduce you as my cousin from out of town. I know there will be a couple of girls there who will take a shot at you."

"And just how do you know this?" I asked.

It turns out that the group she fell into when she hooked up with her current 'cute guy' invited her to a party. She told them she wouldn't be able to sneak away from her husband and they laughed and said to bring him. She told them she couldn't because she didn't want her husband to know that she screwed around.

"If you will go I can call Fred (her 'cute guy') and tell him I've found a way to get out of the house. I'll tell them that my cousin is visiting and I can use him as an excuse. I'll say that hubby doesn't like my cousin so he won't want to come along when I take my cousin out to show him where the night life is in town. Please baby? Please do it? I'll feel so much better about what I'm doing if I know you have done it too."

"I don't know if I can watch you with another man. Letting you go out and do your thing and sitting at home knowing that you are doing it is a hell of lot different from actually seeing it. I have no idea of how I might react."

"You won't have to see it. The party is at a home and there will be more than one room. I'll be in another room so you won't see a thing."

To be completely honest about it I really didn't want to go. I had no interest in having sex with another woman. Sam was more than enough for me, but she kept after me and I finally gave in and went to the party with her as her cousin.

It turned out that when she had called Fred to say she would be coming she set up a blind date for me with one of the girls who she had partied with the night she fell in with the group. I was introduced to Laura and then Fred took Sam by the hand and led her off.

I had a few drinks and talked a while with Laura and then she said:

"I love parties like this. Everyone knows why they are here. It is so much better than going to a bar and hoping you can hook up with a decent guy. I'm ready sweetie; are you?"

I set my drink down and said, "I'm new here. Where do we go?"

She laughed, took my hand and led me to a bedroom that had a king sized bed in it. We quickly undressed, got on the bed and then she swung around and went down on me. I was looking at her pussy and I knew what she wanted and I thought "In for a penny, in for a pound" and I grabbed her hips and pulled her down to me. After several minutes of mutual munching she swung around and mounted me cowgirl.

We were humping away when a naked Sam and Fred came into the room and got on the bed with us. So much for Sam's telling me that I wouldn't have to see her with another man.

I didn't like it!

Fred was a trash talking asshole and he was spouting a lot of crap like, "I'll bet your loser husband doesn't fuck you this good" and Sam went along with him and shot me through the grease with a bunch of stuff like "He has a wimpy little dick" and "He can't fuck for shit." I knew that she was playing along with Fred and didn't really mean it (or at least I hoped she didn't) but I still didn't care for it. I think Sam picked up on my feelings because when we were both finished with our respective partners she said:

"I've always wanted to try a little incest cuz. Want to switch partners and see if we get struck by lightening?"

I'd followed others into Sam since she started 'dating' and it hadn't killed me so I said okay. I think she did it to make it up to me for her trash talk and when we were done she told Fred that he was a better fuck than her husband, but that I was a better fuck than Fred was and she thought she might just keep the fucking in the family from now on. I got an ego boost from Laura when she said:

"Oh no you don't. He's mine" and she went down on me and got me back up for another go. She also gave me her phone number before I left and told me to give her a call.

On the way home Sam asked me if I was going to call Laura and I said, "Probably not."

"Why not? You had fun and a little strange every now and then would do you good."

"Have you forgotten how we got into this? It was because I wasn't able to give you all you needed. I need to save what I do have for you."

"Nonsense. We do just fine and it won't upset me if you give a little of what you have to Laura or one of the others that attend the parties. I liked it and I'd like to do it again."

"I don't know if I want to do it again."

"Think on it baby? Please think on it. It was so much more fun for me having you there with me."

A week later Sam wanted me to go to another party with her. I'd thought on it and decided that I didn't really care for it so I said no. Sam pouted for days and kept working on me and I finally, albeit reluctantly, gave in. She told me that she had talked with Laura and that Laura really was looking forward to seeing me again.

"Just remember the rule; no entanglements. Laura may want you, but you are mine and I do not intend to lose you to her."

We went to the party and after a bit Laura and I headed for a bedroom and Sam and her guy for the evening - a guy named Jay – came along behind us. I said that Laura and I would like a little privacy, but Sam wouldn't have it. We had to do it on the same bed just like the last time. Unfortunately, like the last time, her date was a trash talking asshole and the bastard shot me through the grease the entire time we were there and Sam went right along with the program.

I didn't speak to Sam on the ride home. Every time she started to say something I snarled:

"Shut up Sam. I am severally pissed and it would not be a good thing for me to say anything right now."

When she slid over next to me and reached for me cock I pushed her hand away and told her to leave me alone.

All during the drive I was thinking "Does she go along with the trash talk because she really means it and it is her way of putting something over on me while making me think she is just doing it to go along with the flow?" I didn't used to feel insecure, at least not until Sam took off for her weekend. I don't know that I'll ever get over that. That and how I felt while she was gone. Had I not been getting the job done and Sam had been faking it all along? I remembered the movie "When Harry Met Sally" (or was it When Sally Met Harry?) when Sally demonstrated how easy it was for a woman to fake it. Was Sam's going along with the trash talk how she really felt?

Then I had a nasty thought. Did those guys trash talk because they knew I was Sam's husband and not her cousin? Was it their way of rubbing my face in the fact that they were fucking my wife in front of me? The more I thought about it the more I began to think that the people at both parties were aware that I was Sam's husband. What were the odds that Sam would end up with a trash talking partner two parties in a row?

When we got home I was primed. I leaped into her shit with both feet. I flat out asked her if the guy she was fucking knew that I was really her husband and not her cousin and she looked away from me and didn't answer which of course was all the answer that I needed. Then I asked her if the people we had gotten together with the first time knew the truth. Again I got no answer and she wouldn't look at me. I screamed at her to answer the fucking question and she started crying and finally admitted that every one knew who I was.

I just stared at her in disgust and then said, "So tell me Sam; did you have a good time humiliating me? Or maybe all the shit you said in response to what those two assholes were saying was how you really feel about me huh?"

She tried to run out of the room, but I grabbed her and pushed her down on the couch and told her she wasn't going anywhere until after she had answered all of my questions. It turns out that it was a turn on for her to do it. She said that I knew it wasn't true so there was no harm done.

I was pissed!!!

Seven people at the first party and eleven at the second one and all laughing at me behind my back. Then I unloaded on her. I told her that I was the one who freed her up so she could do what she was doing so I had no bitch coming over that part of it, but she was NEVER to tell me about anything she did from then on and she was NOT EVER to ask me to have anything to do with what she did from then on. Then I told her I was too pissed at her to be anywhere near her and that I would be staying in one of the spare bedrooms and then I stomped out of the room.

Things were cold around the house after that. Sam tried to 'make nice but I wasn't having any of it. I was just too fucking pissed. Sam kept trying to smooth things over, but I was too bent out of shape for her to get anywhere. I had given her permission to play as long as it was all above board and I knew and then she goes and cheats on me behind my back. We worked through that, I put it behind me and let her go play and then she pulled that weekend shit on me. We got by that and then she goes and pulls this party shit. I love the stupid cunt, but I'm now at the point that I just don't trust her any more.

Three weeks went by with me not saying any more than I had to to Sam. She was trying hard to 'make up' but I was still way too pissed. I couldn't get it out of my mind that her trash talk was real; that she meant what she said and that she knew she could get away with it by saying that she was 'just playing the game' and going along. I will admit that I probably wouldn't feel the way I was if it wasn't for the fact that she played me for a fool by letting every one know I was her husband and then making me believe that every one thought that I was her cousin from out of town.

Those three weeks went by with me still in one of the spare bedrooms. Sam hadn't gone out since our blow up so that meant she hadn't been laid in three weeks so she had to be going crazy. The down side was that I hadn't been laid either so I did something that I had never done before. I still had the phone number that Laura had given me so I called her. We talked and then arranged to meet after work for a drink. After one drink Laura said:

"Why are we wasting time sitting here? We both know what we want to happen."

To answer her I took my cell phone out and called home. Sam answered and I said "I won't be home tonight and disconnected.

Laura said "That was short and to the point. I think I detected a touch of "and if you don't like it tough shit" in it."

"That pretty much sums it up."

"Things not so hot on the home front?"

"Haven't been since that last party we went to."

"Why? You seemed to enjoy it. You liked it enough to give me a call."

"Things just didn't set well with me."

"Why not?"

I told her how humiliated I felt after what Sam did to me.

"So what. All it was was sex. So she got off playing her little game. It doesn't change the fact that she loves you. Everyone at those parties is playing a game of some kind. You were playing a game pretending to be her cousin. Fred was playing a game when he trash talked. It was a turn on for him to be able to say that stuff in front of the woman's husband knowing that he wouldn't get the shit beat out of him. I've had Fred a dozen times and he has never trash talked with me.

"I play my own game. Did you know that Steve is my husband? No one at the parties knows it. He watches me and when we get home he goes down on me and cleans me out. It is what turns him on. It turns me on to look down at him and see him play vacuum cleaner. I get so turned on that I almost fuck the poor man to death. Sex is fun lover and different people have different ideas of what fun is. You have to realize that. Sex and love are not the same. Enough of this stuff. Take me somewhere and fuck me."

As I drove home what Laura had said reminded me that my stance had always been sex is sex and love is love and they didn't necessarily have to go hand in hand. In fact that was the main reason for my being able to let Sam go out and play. Was I being too much of an asshole toward Sam? I did say "Go ahead, it is okay with me and by going with Sam to the parties with her wasn't I giving her my stamp of approval?

The car was suddenly jarred as I hit a pothole and it got my attention back on my driving and off my mushy thoughts. Yes I did say okay and yes I guess my attendance at the parties did give my approval, but it was only approval for sex outside of the marriage. It was not an okay to humiliate me and play games on me. According to Laura every one was playing their fun games and every one had different ideas when it came to 'fun games' but to me a game was something you played – not something to be played on you.

When I got home Sam was waiting up for me. "We have to talk Rob."

"Not now Samantha. I've just spent an exhausting evening with Laura and I need to get some sleep. Can't go into work all worn out."

"That's not fair Rob. We haven't made love in over three weeks. It should be me and not Laura."

"I didn't see it that way Samantha. Laura hasn't lied to me and humiliated me in front of others. I feel comfortable around a woman like that."

"Damn it Rob! Why won't you see that it doesn't mean anything? It was just fun. You know that none of what those guys said is true. I got off, they got off and I know that you got off with Laura. As for humiliation? So fucking what! Does anything that those people might think of you matter? You don't know any of them and other than at the parties you never have any interaction with any of them. Do you care what the mailman or the garbage man think of you? How about the check out clerk at the grocery store? Those people mean nothing to you so why do you give a fuck about what they think!