Big Girls Don't Cry Ch. 01

Eventually her sobbing slowed, then stopped, and her breathing evened out and slowed, deepening as she fell asleep still clutching on to me. I lay awake for a long time, my emotions still roiling as I contemplated a life without parents, trying not to remember the life I had when I still had a family, trying not to feel sorry for myself, and not succeeding very well.

I woke early, my med student time-sense flipping me from sleep to full wakefulness with no intermediate state. I was confused for a moment; wasn't I supposed to be at home? Then memory flooded back; there was no home; this was home now. Then came the realisation and recollection that Lena was here with me, and why, with her leg thrown over mine, and her arm flung across my chest.

I eased her arm back and her leg off me so I could slip out of bed and take a pee, then debated getting back into bed or getting dressed. I didn't really want to get back into bed with my kid sister; it felt weird and pervy, so I quietly got a change of clothes and went to have a quick shower before getting some breakfast. When I came back, to wake Lena and ask her what she wanted to do about breakfast, she'd rolled onto her stomach, with her shirt pulled up around her waist, and I could see she was wearing a pink thong. I'd never thought of my sister in a remotely sexual way before, she was just Lena, and now, here was her very shapely rump practically naked to my view, just the string of the thong disappearing into the cleft between her softly rounded buttocks to say she wasn't completely naked under her sleeping Tee.

Admittedly, in my time on the wards at St. George's I'd seen more bare backsides than a man should see in a long lifetime, but there was something so sweetly innocent, and yet so furiously sexy about Lena's practically bare, perfectly formed bottom thrust out at me in that way; innocent yet desirable. I shook myself.

'Get a grip, she's your sister!' I told myself severely, and reached over to pull the sheet up over her, hiding that lovely bum from my view.

I had nothing to eat here; I'd expected to be away for a couple of weeks, or maybe longer, so I'd run the fridge dry, emptied the freezer, and switched them both off. Luckily, there was a golden arches at Amen Corner, just round the corner from the flat, so I went there and bought two sausage muffins and two orange juices for breakfast.

When I came back in, I heard Lena call my name, so I pushed the bedroom door open, and froze. Lena was on her back, her eyes closed and her t-shirt pushed right up under her chin, one hand squeezing and tugging her nipples and the other hand was down inside the front of her thong, working furiously as she rubbed herself. I was transfixed; she had lovely firm breasts, probably 34C or better, a nice handful in any case, topped with long pink nipples, stiff and delicious-looking, surmounting small rose-pink areolas.

"Yes, Darryl, ooh God, yes, like that!" she moaned, and I broke out of my frozen trance to hurriedly back out before she saw me. I walked back to the sitting room in a daze, with just one thought clanging around in my head; Lena was masturbating over me, oh my God! Now what did I do? I'd seen her, heard her, how was I supposed to act around her now? Christ, did she see me? Fuck, this could get awkward really quickly.

To say I was super-weirded out would be an understatement; and yet, the image of her slender figure, her erect nipples, and her hand working away between her thighs remained with me. Every detail of her beautiful face flushed with arousal, her smooth rounded thighs flexing and corded as she thrust her mons against her hand, and her gorgeous pink nipples, stiff and up thrust as she pulled and squeezed them was imprinted on my mind. I could feel myself getting hard as that scene replayed yet again in my mind's eye.

Shaking myself to try and clear the images from my head, I pondered what to do next. I knew I wouldn't confront her, even if I wanted to; a person's fantasies are their own personal property, and if she wanted to rub-off over me, it didn't really affect me; (or at least it hadn't until I'd walked in on her and discovered her doing it). In the meantime breakfast was getting cold, and I had no burning desire to have anything like that kind of conversation with my kid sister (even if she wasn't, a sharp jab of melancholy reminded me...).

Just then, a loud sobbing moan from the bedroom reminded me what Lena was doing in there, and she was probably finished now, so time to arrive...

Getting up, I silently opened and then slammed the front door, to alert her to the fact I was back, and called out to her.

"Lena, fast-food breakfast, come and get it while it's edible!" I shouted, hoping no trace of what I'd seen was in my voice or tone to alert her I was uncomfortable or embarrassed about something.

She appeared at the doorway, smiling, still in her long t-shirt, to sit cross-legged on the couch and dig into her sausage muffin and juice.

"So Darryl, what's the plan for today?" she inquired, and I looked blankly at her; I hadn't thought about it, as I'd planned on a fairly stress-free few weeks with mum and da...them, so my calendar was empty. I plopped down on the other end of the couch and looked at her.

"Lena, I don't know what to do next. I've got quite a bit of cash stored up, so that should tide me...us over for a good while yet, but I wasn't planning on being disinherited so completely, so I don't know. Baby steps, I suppose. Do some shopping. Look for jobs. Work out who I am and where I'm supposed to go now."

Lena slid up next to me, and wrapped her arm around my waist as she laid her head on my shoulder.

"Darryl, you don't need to work out who you are; you're Doctor Daryl Morgan, graduate of the University of London, St. George's Medical School, surgeon par excellence, that hasn't changed, and you're my big brother, and that hasn't changed either. The only identity crisis we need to worry about is the one going on back in Bristol with those two idiots who seem to think they're not your parents!"

I had to grin at that. Talking to Lena was always a lift for my spirits, her irreverence, wit, observational skills and ability to judge character were a delight to listen to when she was in full flow.

She leaned up and pecked me on the cheek.

"Right now we have more immediate matters to attend to; you have no food or supplies, so we need to go shopping soon; a muffin for breakfast may seem like the ideal way to start the day, but that's just advertising propaganda; we need to get some real food, something to stick to the ribs, as well as toiletries, all the things they tell us we can't live without! Thank you for letting me stay with you, I'll go as soon as I can find a place of my own, I promise."

I grinned at her. "Don't be daft, Lena, I'd love you to stay as long as you want; a day, a week, a month, a year, forever, I don't care; you're my little sister and it's still my job to look after you!"

She dimpled at that.

"And that's why I love you so much, Darryl Morgan! Just wait 'til I get dressed, and I'll make you a lunch you'd write home about."

She dressed in an outfit guaranteed to stop traffic, a tiny black skirt of some stretchy material that just covered the cheeks of her bum, a low-cut, figure-hugging black top that outlined every curve and jiggle, and teetering heels that made her legs go on forever. If she hadn't been my sister/aunt/whatever, I'd have a made a grab at her, and she seemed to know that was the effect she was having on me. Had she dressed like this just to tempt me and reel me in? An intriguing, uncomfortable, arousing thought.

We shopped at the local Sainsbury's in Balham. I told Lena to have a ball, my treat, buy anything she wanted, and she took me at my word, loading the shopping trolley with any and everything that took her fancy. As we strolled around the supermarket, I pushed the shopping trolley, and she linked arms with me, walking close enough to bump hips with me, and occasionally flashing me that 1,000 kilowatt smile of hers.

She got a lot of looks, I have to admit, and I did feel more than a little ego-boosted to have such a beautiful girl hanging on my arm as though we were actually a real couple.

When we got back to the flat, I stashed the groceries while Lena started cooking, and in an hour we were sitting down to her speciality, a fabulous Cottage Pie with green beans and cabbage, good, old-fashioned comfort food. She'd changed into a t-shirt and a pair of track-suit bottoms to cook, and I couldn't help noticing how they clung to her svelte legs and firm bum.

I didn't have a dining room, only a small dinette table I sometimes used for studying, so we ate in front of the TV, one at each end of that atrocious couch so we could talk as we ate. Our conversation was mostly about her parents. I still couldn't bring myself to resume calling them 'mum & dad'; well, they weren't, were they?

Lena tapped her fork thoughtfully against her bottom lip.

"You know, Darryl, much as I thought about it, and tried to put myself in their place, and tried to see it from their point of view, I couldn't; they had no right to just cast you adrift like that. They should have told you when you were a small boy, or never. You had a right to know, and they had a duty to either tell you from the outset, or kept their mouths shut forever after, amen!"

I was kind of in agreement with her, but they were still her parents, and dumping them like that seemed a little drastic. I said as much to her, and she looked at me with that diamond-hard stare she'd given her mother last night as she walked out of her house.

"I said it once before, Darryl, do pay attention! They tried to take my big brother away from me; hell, they DID take him away; in their eyes he never existed, they just kept you because they didn't know what else to do. They made my brother into a phantom with a couple of sentences, and they wonder why you reacted the way you did. Well, you may not be their son, but you are my brother, and you're all the family I want or need around me, end of story!"

She put her plate down on the coffee table and slid next to me, slipping her arm around my waist as she rested her head on my shoulder.

"I want you to know one thing, sweetie; I will never, ever, desert you or hurt you like that, I swear. After last night, I know you need me, and God knows, I need you too, but I need you to know and believe that you still have family who love you, you have me. We're family, the only family we have left, and we need to stick together. I'll always be here for you, just like you were always there for me when I was growing up. OK?"

With that, she leant up and kissed me, a small, firm kiss on the corner of my mouth, gentle, loving and genuine, a sisterly kiss, but it burned as it chimed and resonated through me.

We avoided the subject for the rest of the day, talking instead about what we were going to do next, our ideal jobs and how to find them, and mutual friends from back home. I'd almost forgotten how much I needed Lena; almost losing her nine years before had scared me in a way I'd never thought possible, and she'd become very precious to me, both as my sister and as my very best friend.

It was Lena who taught me to dance, who vetted my girlfriends (not that there were that many; it was Lena I used as a yardstick for comparison, and not many at all came even close to measuring up to her), and who commiserated with me when one of my fleeting relationships went south, as they all inevitably did; I guess, when I look back now, subconsciously I was looking for the one girl who was everything Lena was without actually being Lena. I never found her.

Eventually, we ended-up side-by-side on that hideous couch, Lena with her legs curled under her and my arm around her, watching some soppy late-night movie.

Chick-flick movies were Lena's one weakness, and I sat with her, mainly to hand her tissues as she sniffled, sobbed, and gasped along with the mush-headed heroine, who seemed to me to be going out of her way to fuck-up her relationship with her equally mush-headed love-interest. I decided early-on he should have been out instead looking for a slutty chick with fewer commitment issues, instead of hoping for some from this dimwit, so I shut off completely.

At last, the interminable epic was over, I was almost terminally bored, and there was a pile of crumpled tissues on the couch next to Lena, so a successful evening from her point of view. As the end credits rolled, Lena made no effort to move, and I thought that (God help me...please) there was yet another one of these horror stories coming on, but no...

Lena reached up and pulled my head down, kissed me on the cheek and whispered;

"Thank you for sitting-up with me, Dar, I know you hate these films. You can let go of my arse now...!"

I looked at her in mild incomprehension, then my eyes widened in shock as I realised I was holding her buttock firmly, not even realising I was doing it in my stunned state from watching that God-awful film...

I let her go like I'd been scalded, stuttering out apologies as my face burned, but she pecked me on the cheek again.

"It's alright, Dar, I know you weren't trying anything on with me, I could see how out of it you were. Besides," she grinned cheekily, "it was quite nice, if you know what I mean!"

She scootched up even closer to me, took my hand and put it back on her bum.

"There, that feels better, I like it there, Dar, keep it there for a while, please!" she smiled, so I did, much as I wanted to snatch it away; I had no business holding my sister, aunt, whatever, so intimately, but she obviously felt differently. I tried slowly sliding it off her smooth flank, but she just clicked her tongue and put it right back, growling;

"I said liked it; now stop moving it away, Dar!"

We sat for a while, Lena obviously enjoying the feel of my hand on her taut buttock, and to be honest, so was I; I was at war with myself; part of me was repulsed at the thought I was effectively groping my kid sister's backside, but another, darker, hornier part of me was thoroughly enjoying the smooth supple feel of her delightful rump under my hand. I began to make involuntary squeezing, massaging movements with my hand, and Lena sighed and moved even tighter against me, putting her arm around my waist and pressing her face into the crook of my neck.

When I realised what I was doing I stopped, Lena making a small discontented sound into my neck, but I really thought enough was enough; after what I'd seen that morning, this was perhaps a step too far. Instead I gently patted her bottom, a chaste, brotherly 'tap, tap'.

"Come on you, it's late, don't you want to go to bed?" I said, realising how it sounded as the words left my mouth, but Lena didn't bite, she just uncurled and slid upright, pulling me up with her.

"Come on then Darryl, you made me get up, so you have to get up too!"

I grinned and indicated the bathroom to her, she smiled prettily and slipped into the bedroom to change into her night wear while I checked the doors and windows and pulled down the window-shades. Just then, Lena came out of the bedroom, her toiletries and a bath towel over her arm.

"I'm having a nice long shower, if I come back and find you snoring and sprawled across the bed, I'll kick you, got it?" she grinned at me, one eyebrow raised, and I had to grin as I nodded in agreement.

I changed and slid into bed, still slightly weirded-out by sharing a bed with my sister, but made sure I only took up the minimum space on the not overly large double-bed. I was just beginning to drop off when I heard Lena's hairdryer humming in the sitting room. The rhythmic sound lulled me, and I fell fast asleep.

I woke with the scent of strawberries in my nostrils, Lena's shampoo, but that wasn't what woke me; years of sleeping with one ear open listening for my pager to go off had honed my hearing to a fine-tuned detection device, and what had awakened me had been a gasp from Lena, intruding into my confused dream of soft skin and damp heat, and pulling me back into wakefulness.

At the same time a feeling of moist warmth was enveloping the tip of my penis, which was at an aching pitch of throbbing hardness, solidly, painfully erect. A warm hand was wrapped around me, holding me as the sensation of hot moistness ebbed and flowed. Lena was holding me, and as I looked down at her, she looked back up at me, her bottom lip caught between her teeth as she grinned at me.

"The sleeper awakens!" she whispered, as I struggled between the echoes of my dream, and the reality of now, which was that Lena was lying up against me, naked, her lovely, hard-nippled breasts pressed against me as she rubbed my cock against her moist hairless slit. My shorts were half way down my thighs, so presumably she'd slid them down when she pulled out my cock.

I lay there for a moment, enjoying the feel of her dampness against my sensitive head, the heat from her slit enticing and sexy, before I realised what we were doing and began to pull away from her.

"Uh-uh, Doctor-Boy, not finished yet!" gasped Lena, rubbing the head of my cock against her clitoris, the hard nub obvious against the tender flesh of my cock head. She began to gasp harder, her movements faster and more definite as she stroked her slit against my hardness, the lips dragging wetly along my length. Her hips pumped as she masturbated fiercely against me, until suddenly she went rigid, her eyes rolling back as a spurt of warmth coated my cock and balls. Lena shuddered and mewled as her orgasm pulsed through her, her shudders gradually dying away as she came down, to collapse into me.

I held her close, feeling her heart hammering even as I wondered how the hell I was going to get out of this without really offending her; however, the one question I wanted to avoid at all costs was the only one I could think of asking; 'what made you decide to have a wank against me, Lena, now of all times?'

Eventually she slid her arms around my neck and looked up at me, no trace of guilt or embarrassment, just a happy grin as she pulled herself up and kissed me on the tip of my nose.

"That was nice, Darryl, I should have done that years ago!" she giggled, and then laughed at my expression.

"Oh Darryl, you should see your face; you look like someone just shoved an extra-large cucumber right up your arse!"

I looked at her, painfully aware that my erection was undimmed by her finishing herself off on it; if anything, it was even more engorged, and her pebble-hard nipples poking solidly into me were not helping matters any.

She reached down and started to slide my shorts off, and I resisted, until I realised that there was no point; I had a tremendous boner prodding her in the stomach, so modesty wasn't my most pressing concern right now.

I tipped her head back to look into her eyes.

"Why, Lena, why now?

She grinned cheekily.

"If I'd asked, would you have said yes?"

I looked away.

"Probably not."

She pulled my head back around to look at her.

"That's why Darryl. I've wanted to do that, and more, for the longest time now, but you were gone for so long, and then all that business at home happened, and I had to choose between the olds and you; I chose you."

I snorted.

"Lena, you left your parents because you wanted to rub-off against me? That's just not rational, and I thought you were nothing but!"

She kissed me on the base of my throat.

"No Darryl, I didn't choose you because I wanted a cheap thrill; I came with you because I've been in love with you since I was five years old; couldn't you tell? All I ever wanted was to be near you, all I ever did was to please you! When we had that...that thing, when I was 15, and I thought I'd lost you, I was really afraid you were going to leave, sick as you were, just sneak away one day and never come back. I was terrified they'd find you dead in some squalid room somewhere, starved to death or with a needle in your arm, or something like that. I was so frightened I cried for days. I used to get up at night, every night, and check your room, just to make sure you were still there, that I hadn't lost you, but you never knew, because I wanted you to be happy to be home with me again, with me, do you understand? I love you Darryl Morgan, and you're not going anywhere without me!"