All Comments on 'Bonus'

You are not the most polished writer, but I like your style, your characters and especially your sense of humor. Best of all, you make me laugh and that is a good thing.

As a German trying to speak English, I am used to a bad "Denglisch" (that's how Germans call a mixture of German and English) accent. But yours didn't sound real, it was almost painful to read (for me) and kept me from finishing the story.

So I'm optimistic and just assume the story was top notch and it's just me as a German being unable to read it.

Somehow, probably out of boredom, I made it to the end of the second page. I'm sorry, but your technical errors are so disorienting and so many, and the story not nearly compelling enough, for me to keep trying to figure it out. Just one fer instance: Out of the blue, you introduce the Sue character sitting beside a creek. That's OK. But them, here come this listing of entirely new characters who were never even mentioned in the prior text, let alone included with any description, with any indication of how they were connected with ANY of the existing characters. It was as if they were blocked and copied from another story and accidentally pasted into this one. There is no literary technique that recognizes such a disconnected intrusion.

Your attempt at both Cajun and Germlish dialog is so bad, so intrusive, so disorienting, as to discredit the any value of whatever plot line you envision. I think I stumbled on one of your previous stories . . . same problem as I am now recalling. You really ought to take a writing course -- or something -- in a local community college. Or something.

My eyes light up when I see one of your loving wives stories. Unusual style, off the wall sense of humour, and a taste of life in deepest Louisiana - what is there not too like.

Thanks for your efforts JimBob

Thanks for another great story. Somehow I missed “Nude on a Bearskin Rug”. I like Sue Lynn’s character. I’ll have to backtrack.

I’ve read a lot of fiction lately that eschews traditional English grammar and structure. A writer named C B McKenzie won some recognition for “Bad Country”, a southwestern crime novel. No quotation marks in the dialogue. It took a bit to get used to it, but it all made sense in context, and the book was great. I feel the same way about your style. Easy to read contextually, and I see the loose treatment of traditional writing rules as stylistically quite creative and refreshing. I’m afraid if you “tightened up” your work with an editor, you’d kill the charm in your style. Please don’t.

As always, thanks again for sharing. And thanks for the SWLA fix.*****

People think in their native language, not in an awful approximation of bad English. I found it unreadable.

The story was fun and your sparse but colorful style paints pretty pictures of DeGard in my mind. Do not waste good story-writing time trying to please the grammar patrol squad; great bedtime stories end your tales only need one thing: more of them!

The story was great. I noticed the haters feel the need to write half a page telling you how you screwed it up. But they haven't written too many stories themselves. Keep it up, and remember... Haters gotta hate.

I couldn't make it past three paragraphs. Your idiotic broken English attempts to give some local flavor to stories kill the stories. I have no idea what you think you're doing, but it isn't entertaining and it isn't fun. It's just mind numbing. Two stars is very generous for this crap.

I have no idea what that was about. It was unreadable.

I don't comment on a JimBob44 story.

He writes for his own enjoyment.

the flavor of Lousyann comes thru clear

The story line was grear. BTB then live better. If some idiots can't read local flavor speech, let them suckered eggs.

Only negative...64 'Vettes did not have trunks. Coupes were fastback but no trunk lid.

Old Dave

for you. Great story but would fit better in romance but a good read; thanks.

Nice start to the day while running updates on servers. Thank you

What a pain in the ass reading this terrible dialect. You told us they are German, you don’t need to ruin a possible good story with idiotic Anglo-Germanic language. Unfortunately it makes the characters out to be somewhat stupid.

Thanks for sharing a great read.

Always enjoy your stories! Keep doing what you do!!

... with just the right amount of the cheating ex-wife getting hers. Between the German and your more typical cajun dialects I suspect you have to fight with autocorrect a lot more than most authors but it was not hard to read.

Thank you again for sharing this wonderful tale of a cheating bitch getting what's coming to her - and the cheated husband being rewarded by karma.

As to the German included it added wonderfully to the atmosphere of the tale. Ignore any assholes who aren't intelligent enough to understand that, but then you already do =D

I veel neffer know. Too much ov the sheet vriting.

Put a smile on my face when I saw a new story from you. Honestly worth the five star rating.

Used to enjoy your writing talent, but this was fragmented and confusing. Go back to your earlier writing style.

entertaining and funny. Very nice story and where can I get a young woman like that

I always enjoy your writing.

wth happen, that dialog good god man lol wth and where the hell did all those ppl come from in the middle of page one u introduced like 4 ppl in 2 little paragraphs. i really wanted to enjoy it but only understanding every other word and building my own context doesnt make for a good story. oh and wth is Ja is that German for something?

Did you learn a German accent watching re-runs of Hogan's Heroes? I laughed for half a page before it got just ridiculous. As bad as your Cajun accent is, this was just, what the fuck? bad.

You were never very good, and this is just screaming fucking awful. How anyone thinks this guy is such a great writer, I'll never know.

To get used to your writing style...after getting into the groove a good read...thx

The best thing you've written. Thanks so much. Keep writing.

I'd hate to see worst!

I enjoyed this whimsical farcical tale.

It was fun and entertaining and easy to read.

Ignore the illiterates who are hung up on their own disinclinations and keep writing for yourself and sharing with rest of us!

Thank you!

no no i finished it wish i hadnt lol the dialog started to go into a cave man, me man u woman u give me son i call police give son lol well i did make me laugh so i guess it wasnt a total loss

Screw those who complain about the accent. Let them try to write English words with an accent and see how well they do. Accents are for hearing, not reading so you did the best you could. It was a little unbelievable ho quickly she just fell in with him. Someone who was as bored as she was at the beginning probably wouldn’t have had the patience to get to know him, damn, imagine his luck if she did. The story was fun and had a lot of divorced middle aged guys wishing it were them.

JimBob, I have found I like your writing style. You have a knack of creating cases that show that the male protagonist doesn't end up being a cuckold wimp. I feel that you might be what ever the next step above legion is. You keep writing and I'll keep reading. Sorry you don't read e-mails.

I liked this story and could read more like this one....

I found it incredibly hard to follow the story with the dialogue in a german accent. Maybe if you just mentioned that they were speaking that way and write what they are saying in english. I usually like your stories but found this one impossible to get through. Sorry!

Even though it was hard to believe this would have happened it was still far more believable than those silly BTB stories where the husband rapes the mother in law, cuts off the balls of the ex’s lover and dances for joy when she is left destitute and d graded. Those tend to be written in the minds of men who got taken to the clean real in divorce and fantasize these stories over beers at the local dive bar.

What a nerve! Some people...!

Enjoyed the story a lot.

I think the plot is good. I just haven't gotten past page 2. Dialogue is very disturbing. It's honestly giving me headache. Just like your other stories, grammar is at it's worst. Maybe this is your style where the dialogue is not the 'usual' one, but I'm not up for it. As you stated, you don't need an editor so I won't try bringing it up.

The broken english and accent were distracting. I work with people from varying languages and while I realize how hard it is to speak English, their accents improve to varying levels as well.

And the Jerome mini-plot- ewwww!!!! The hubby would have to give the Wife the house and custody of their underage kids and pay spousal support. Courts dont care about infidelity. DO some research. I only read a few paragraphs. Your humor is okay but the subject matter and plot are bullshit!

I gave you the 5 stars for the 'vette and the blond. Didn't care that maybe the German accent was off a bit or that maybe you left out or added one too many commas. That shit doesn't get my juices flowing like some of the others on here. Whatever turns you on I guess.

You're a great story teller, one of the few that I like so well, that I will I read the same the same stories over and over again. We have a codependent relationship that works well. Thanks again

called, "Pretty Woman?" A movie with Julia Roberts and I think Richard Gere? Seemed like it was kind of popular for a while, made some money, had lots of memorable funny, romantic, and sentimental scenes.

Ya, stories like that just aren't popular. Well, at least in some peoples' limited imaginations.

It would be interesting to understand what made Inga turn into such a heartless selfish monster, or, if she always was one, what made Claude marry her to begin with. Guess that's for another time, and maybe another writer.

This was a fun romantic farce, and I thank you for writing it. And I thank you for allowing me to tell you. Guess that makes at least two of us who really don't know what good fun erotica is. Well, us, and the producers of "Pretty Woman."

a really good story that was fun to read. Your penchant for accents often takes a little getting used to, but I find your writing to be braver then most and your willingness to write characters that are colloquial interesting. This story was very...sweet and innocent. I really enjoyed that. I read Richard Gerald and he writes these very cynical (very good and very interesting) stories, but then I read this and I am happy to be reacquainted with two characters that are just sweet, innocent and really good people.

The story was fast paced (didn't drag), kept my interest and like all your work, made me feel like I was in the region you were writing about. Your very good at giving the reader the feeling of what it would be like to live where the story takes place. Add to it a happy ending where the good guys win and whats not to like? Five stars.

I like this story - one of JB's best. Some great lines and a lovely little lady who will be a true Loving Wife. Well done!

I've never seen any story on the site worse.

Cornpone porn for rednecks, except with a German accent, this time.

I gave up after the first few paragraphs. I wasn't about to try and figure out what you were trying to say through the story.

I can not believe how bitter some of the other comments are, I enjoy your stories very much and look forward to your new ones as they appear, I live in the great beautiful pacific northwest and have never been in the south, but I enjoy the flavor and descriptions you describe from your part of the country...really people lighten up, these stories are FREE.. I gave you 5 stars for this one, partly because some of the commenters....keep writing, you can tell from your scores, most of us like your stories very much

Funny accents and all, a total delight from start to finish. 5*

Fun and entertaining story, thank you for sharing your creative talent.

Enjoyment. At its finest.

.....you well earned your Five Stars - Thank You for a good story !!

Hi I really enjoyed the story - the long slow burn before the sex was good fun, thank you for a great read.

Jon

As a reader,I read for the content. As an instructor, I read for grammar, spelling, and punctuation. This story is poorly put together in the begining, but improves as it goes along. It's a fun story with a constantly changing pace. The character are well described, the dialogue is a little weird but doesn't effect the essence of the story. The story is a good example of a December May romance. Sue Lynn is a slut, but a lovable slut and she and Claude make a great couple and unbelievable in bed. Great sex scenes. Not the greatest literary piece but an entertaining story. It's essence is romantic and loving. Well done for a reader.

Sweet. Excellent work.

But it lacks tension.

Good story. Worth more than 5 stars I think.

I finally gave up reading this story, the German accent was annoying, the story was just thrown together. It seemed like this story was written by a 5 year old.

This story is totally implausible, but I loved it. Thanks.

This is a fine story; well told.

but better than many.

I took the weird accent to be German trying to be Cajun... YMMV.

Only problem I have is a vision of Sue Lynn in a few years... well, more to love I expect.

Still, I do make a point of reading your stories.

Green-something

I really did. You seem to have some kind of very vocal fan base, so I figured I just had to be judging you too harshly.

Well...

It...just didn't work for me. And I recall you are absolutely obdurate against....sorry...obdurate means 'stubborn' or willfully set in one's ways...so I have nothing to offer in advice.

I am sure there are people who love your work. Please focus on them.

Your stories take me to another place. Sometimes a strange place, but always interesting and fun. Thanks JB

. . . you had two native German speakers speaking to each other in badly accented English. They should have spoken to each other in German.

Still, it was a fun story, even if a bit too over the top to be believable.

when a real bonus is given and a bonanza is earned, TK U MLJ LV NV

Nice to see a Tuff as nail sorta sequel. Idk about German accents. I didn't hate nor love the accent. It did make him seem very foreign so mission accomplished. Loved this story!

but acceptable anyhow, overcome by reader desire and by some acknowledgement of her past. More with the "accent" -- Russian speakers of English have problems with definite and indefinite articles in English, because their native language lacks them. German has them abundantly. So his accent it was not the one of a German speaker of English and any which way why his origin was in another language it was not anyhow clear. Not needed. Nicht wahr? Ganz wahr! Aber uberall, entzuckend und herrlich!

The broken English didn't bother me. If anything it made me picture the main character clearly like what JustGr8 said below. I really liked this couple. I do worry about their age difference and the fact that they married in under 72 hours?

Didn't realize that was Ezekiel from Tuff as Nails until the last page. Always enjoy seeing other characters from your stories pop up.

Another great yarn....thanks, JB!

"Nobody’s taking your wife. Oh, don’t get me wrong. They’ll fuck your wife. Oh, they’ll fuck her good. They’ll fuck her better than you. But they not gonna take her. There’s no guy going, “Yeah, I want her to yell at me the way she yells at him.” “I wanna live in a house with no pictures of my mother.” Oh, they’ll fuck her, and then they’ll return her. “I believe this is yours.” “Bitch had me feeling bad about myself.” -Chris Rock

Part of the humour was the mixture of cultures. A mashup of dis-similar accents, life styles with no common point, ages all over the place, and a bit of karma thrown in because you could.

.

Thanks for sharing.

... from the master of dialect. Keep it up.

Another really good story...

... from the master of dialect. Keep it up.

yeah witch dialict do you mean couze i cant pick one up in this mess it certainly is not german! it is offensive even how you do it i wil give you a 1 just for being a idiot that doesent know his shit and becouze your dialect is just offensive

I could have sworn I commented, if I did it has been deleted. If so, this one will probably also end up on the cutting room floor. The broken English-German made this simply too painful for me to read.

Sorry.

but it should be.

Loved it. Very enjoyable spending a little time in fantasy land.

My wish to all of you with cheating bitch wives is you find a young woman like this to delight you and piss off your ex.

not how life works. I can proof other's writing but apparently not my own.

Can't believe someone comments on the German accent.....it is irrelevant as it's a good story. Keep up the good work jb

"cuck in a closet"

Watching a Major Auto Auction live in Houston today . A '64 Corvette Convertible sold for $32,000.00

Part of the fun was reading pissed off commenters. (Oh ya, enjoyed the positive ones, too, yeah).

Cajun (?) speech and German-English butchery added flavor.

Over the top. Unrealistic. Wonderful. Fun. Funny.

Paul in Oklahoma

Loved it, Ja.

The bonus was great and buying a classic corvette was great. But a1964 Corvette does not have a trunk. I liked the story.

Thank for the follow-up to the Tuff story. Do it again, with the new generator, and maybe with Tuff's & Claude's, kids in Kindergarten , then school, then ......Anyway, another 5 stars, only 'cause I can't give it more. Jay..

I hate all these clever bastards that extract the ureic out of other peoples accent - vat u tink mon?

What’s with the hillbilly language. People only talk like that in the movies and anti-Trump commercials. 🤪

JB again burns a bitch by moving on in fine style with 2 hopelessly mismatched characters that just somehow work, the studious devoted slightly nerdy betrayed divorcee father and the sexy young but faithfull devoted fuckdoll from the poor side of town, simply brilliant.

I couldn’t finish it. The goofy accents ruined, for me anyway, what may actually be a pretty good story. At least, according to some of the comments I’ve read. Moving on...

I loved the story, great and funny.

Thanks

Had to get past the accent in the writing at first but it made it better by the end

Thank you

Jim Bob You are a REAL story-teller, not like some of the 'authors' who submit soulless epistles to this site. Thank You on behalf of all of us who read Literotica and crave a satisfying and uplifting tale of a real 'loving wife'( if only while she is still 'in training') Great Job I shall look at all of your stories, Thank You.

How about a story of Inga's life going further down the tubes? Claude, Sue Lynn and Charles can be shown continuing to live the good life as they add to their family. And maybe get a Land Rover to go with the Vette.

I am thoroughly enjoying the JB44 Universe.

I love the stories and then recognizing other characters just adds that little extra.

You are, by far, one of my favorite writers here. I absolutely love that your story universe can be tied together with interchangeable characters and locations.

Great story,

Loved this story from the start to the finish. Hoping that something like this could happen to me.

This was a really fun read.

Dis is wunderbar. 5