Dark as Daylight Ch. 18

Paul said, "His heart is cold, Doctor."

"That will be 200 soldier."

"Do you see what I mean, doctor?"

"Are we trying for 'five hundred', private."

"It's an awful long swim back to the island, Mr. Canyon."

"I'll rent a helicopter."

"You didn't bring any identification with you, remember? I had to sign you in, because I am your son."

"You are loving this, aren't you?"

"You know it, daddy."

"Doctor, I will give you $20 million, in cash, for 37 mg of potassium hydrochloride, a hypodermic needle, a stun gun, and five minutes of privacy with my son."

"Mr. Canyon, I can give you all those things, but it will not work."

"Why not Doctor?"

"Look at him. If there is 10% body fat on him, anyone would have trouble finding it. Where would an ordinary stun gun needle penetrate? It would probably just bounce off him, because he is all muscle. If that's not enough, if it did stick, he would pull the probe out of his body and attach it to his head so he could laugh at you. Finally, and most importantly, he wears those damn military boots, with the one inch thick rubber soles. There is no way for the electricity to course through his body, and debilitate him. If you have been training him all these years, as he told me you were, you have only yourself to blame for your failure in this attempt to kill him."

"You had to rub salt into my wounds, didn't you, Doctor?"

"No, not really; Paul asked me if he could have 37 mg of potassium hypochlorite after you came back from surgery. He offered me the land on Vancouver Island, the vacation home in Tahiti, and $10 million in cash. I had to turn him down, because of my oath not to hurt people."

"You bastard."

"It was worth a try, dad, wasn't it?"

Lucius looked at Paul's eyes, and he knew something was wrong.

He looked at the doctor, who was busy looking busy.

He looked at Megan, who looked away quickly.

"I've been had, haven't I?"

Megan took a towel and wiped Lucius head.

"A nice elderly gentleman like you could never be had, could he?"

"I'll give you $10 million to go out to my home, bring me my Sidearm, and two clips. When you're safely at home watching television, you will hear something awful that happened at your place of work, but you will not come here, because you were not listening to the television. You had fallen asleep and did not hear anything about that tragedy."

"Lucius, you must have been a very bad boy when you were a boy."

"Meg, I don't think you will believe me, but it is the truth. I did not tap my first piece of ass until I was 22 years old."

Paul shouted so loudly that the furniture in the room shook.

"I didn't know that!"

Nurses, technicians, orderlies, janitors, doctors and guards ran from their duty station to see what happened in the Colonel's room.

It took Doctor McCowan, and Megan several moments to appease everyone's curiosity, and assure them everything was fine.

Security was not so sure, and asked if they should stay close by.

He told them no, and to go back to their normal stations, because everything was fine.

They did so with great reluctance.

When everything was back to normal, Paul said, "What else don't I know?"

Lucius said, "I thought you knew."

"How did you hang onto that, until you were 22?"

"Think about it, Paul? I was born and raised in a town, where everybody knew everybody, and no one locked their doors at night. You couldn't sneeze without having the entire block say, "God bless you." If you told anyone you touched a girl's breasts, it was all over town the next day, and her father was standing on your doorstep the following evening. It was the best form of birth control ever invented.

I had just turned 17, when I left home, and went to the Academy. Four years later, I was 21, and I graduated second in my class. I didn't want to go back home, so I went straight to Fort Benning for parachute training. They tried to bust me out, because of my height and weight, and I had to fight to stay in. I know you remember I only lost that one fight at the Academy, and the people they put me up against at jump school found out I was not such an easy target after all. After I got my parachute wings, they sent me to Fort Belvoir, Virginia to learn about the civilian nuclear reactor they had there, from the bottom up. I don't know if they knew in advance, or were just worrying about what the future held, but 18 months later, I was transferred to Harrisburg, Pennsylvania to help with the mess that occurred at 3 Mile Island.

I made an awful lot of civilian enemies because of the way I thought the cleanup should go, but I made it many more friends, in very high military circles, especially Admiral Rickover, and General Grover, and they didn't forget about me, when it came time for placement and advancement."

"Brownnoser."

"Call it what you will, Paul, but did you get any of your stripes, without working your ass off for them?"

"There I go again. I had to open my big mouth, and showed both my feet into it, didn't I? No sir, I did not. I worked my ass off, and earned every stripe on my shoulder."

"I believe I did the same thing to get my Silver Oakleaf's, Sergeant. If they let me stay in, I might have received a star."

"I would never have heard the end of it."

"You're right, Paul; I would have been insufferable."

"You are insufferable, sir."

"Have you done your 500 already, Sergeant?"

"While you were napping, sir."

"I did not take a nap."

"Ask your nurse, sir."

"Meg, did I take a nap?"

"Don't put me in the middle of your pissing contest, boys."

A tall skinny man walked into the room, and asked jovially, "Okay, which one of you wants to go to the other end of this wonderful hospital to have an arteriogram? The guy lying down on-the-job, with his left leg raised on a pillow is the winner. You get to ride on my flying machine."

Meg laughed, "You are always the life of the party, Hamp."

"That's why my mom made two of me. She knew one would not be enough to go around."

Meg laughed. "Where is Stamp now?"

"The last time we heard from him, he was somewhere around the Horn of Africa chasing bad guys in tiny boats. He told us it was so much fun when they tried to out run his 5-inch gun."

"Not much of a contest, I guess?"

Hamp replied, "Yeah, he told us that the shell goes through the boat, and explodes as it's going through the keel. It blows the boat up into tiny pieces, along with the people on it. It just ain't worth the money they make if they successfully hijack a big boat, and get millions in ransom for it, and the crew."

"Not if you don't live to spend it."

"Isn't that the truth."

"Come on little guy, you got a date with a redhead."

Paul had Hamp by the throat before he took his next breath.

"Listen to me you little bastard. The person you are going to put on your gurney is Colonel Lucius C. Canyon, of the United States Army. You will treat him with the utmost respect at all time. If his left leg was not broken, he would teach you this lesson himself, and not as kindly as I am. When he was finished with you, you would be eating through a straw for the next six months, and laying in bed with casts on both arms and legs, for the next three. No one, let me repeat that for you, no one talks down to him, or about his size that way without reprisals heading their way. Do we understand one another?"

All Hampton could do was nod. The vice grip Paul's hand had around his throat prevented him from breathing, but had not prevented him from listening intently.

"Good. Now, walk at a moderate pace, and get my dad to his assigned room for the arteriogram, without ruffling his feather again. I will be close behind you. If you do anything wrong, you will wake up face down on the floor, with a handwritten, 'do not disturb' note, signed by me, laying beside your head. Do you have any questions about your trip to radiology?"

Hamp replied timidly, "Yes sir; I mean no sir."

"Get on your way, and remember, I'll be close behind you, very close."

As he was moved into the hallway, Lucius said, "Paul, you sounded almost like me. Of course, this gentleman would have been lying on the floor, face up, as I explained everything to him, but you did well for a noncommissioned officer."

"Remember Colonel, Hampton has orders not to hurt you. I reserved that joy for myself. I can only hope that you will be bedridden, for a minimum of the next 3 to 6 months, because of this clumsiness of yours. It will give me many chances to 'accidentally', add tons of agony to your miserable life."

"You bastard, you're fired."

"Thank you, sir. I'll find those two numbskulls, and bring them to the hospital to serve you."

"If you leave my side, when I am recovered, you will be 1 inch shorter than I am."

"That is big talk coming from a little, incapacitated, man."

"We will talk about this when I have recovered plebe."

*******************

The gurney never touched a wall or the door on its way out of the room. Hamp walked down the right side of the hallway being careful of any door that was open, or opening, not wanting anyone to bump into his charge. He didn't know how far behind him Paul was, and he didn't dare look.

Paul was still in the room talking with Doctor Steve McCowan.

"I want you to get the best vascular surgeon you have. If you are right, they are going to have to repair the artery, before they can start work on the bones. If you don't have anyone, I'll take him to Seattle now. Don't guess with his health, he has enough problems as it is."

"We have an excellent vascular surgeon. His name is Mark Vassello. He is a Canadian product, but he graduated from Emory University Medical School. He was no dullard, either. He graduated 29^th in a class of 320 doctors. We've all asked him why the hell he came back here, and he told us flat out that he could not stand the American system. I guess it takes all kinds."

"We also have an excellent orthopedic surgeon, Albert Finlandar. He is a graduate of McGill University, and the University of Washington Medical School. For the want of a few hundred miles, he could be making 50 times the money. He says he doesn't care about the money, he just wants to work properly and treat his patients with care. He could do it better in the US."

"Okay, I want them both here, and in the Colonel's room at 9 AM. If they argue with you, ask them which side of the dirt they prefer being on. Steve, I'm not joking. I don't joke when it comes to him."

"I'll tell them, Paul, and I assure you they will be here. Meg is an OR nurse, she does this to add income. Would you like her in the OR with the Colonel?"

"Do you bake cakes, also?"

"What kind do you want?"

"The Colonel loves Blackout cakes."

"It takes two days to make those from scratch, but I'll make a big one especially for him."

"Make two of them, and I will make your dreams come true."

"You got it, Paul."

"Okay, I have to go find dad, before Hamp shits in his pants."

"All the way to the end of the hall, followed the blue line to the redline, asked the attendant what's room he is in."

"Thanks Meg, see you later."

They were just wheeling the Colonel into the examination room, as Paul trotted down the hall.

Hampton said, "I swear I felt your breath on my neck every step of the way here."

"Isn't it amazing what a little fear will do to you?"

"I guarantee you it made me think twice before I did anything wrong."

"You may want to pass that message along to anyone who might treat my dad. I won't tolerate him being abused in any manner. I know you understand it now, make them understand it." Paul reached into his pocket and pulled out five $100 bills.

He said, "There are two methods of gaining compliance with your wishes. One is with kindness, and the other is with a gun.'

He handed the $500 to Hampton. "Which way do you think you prefer?"

Hampton looked at the five bills in his hand and said, "Sir, I'm 22 years old. I can say in all honesty I've never had this much cash in my hand in all my life. I think I like this way better."

"I agree with you. How can you be so skinny, and so soft at the same time?"

"What do you mean soft? I can handle my own end."

"You couldn't do 50 push-ups correctly if your life depended on it."

"I'll bet you $500 I can."

"Let me see you do one push-up correctly."

Hampton got down on the floor and did a push-up. Paul put his foot on his back and didn't let him up.

"That is not a push-up."

"What was it?"

"It was a crude attempt at looking like a push-up. Lay down flat on the floor, put your elbows and arms by your sides, and your hands by your ears. Bring your toes under your feet, and brace your body straight as a steel rod. Now do one push-up."

As hard as Hampton tried, he couldn't keep his body straight as he pushed himself up.

Paul asked, "Are you sure you want to bet me $500 that you can do 50 proper push-ups?"

Hampton got up and said, "No one can do 50 push-ups in that position; it's impossible."

Paul fell to the ground and did 50 push-ups in 45 seconds. Hampton's voice was caught in his throat.

"Any questions?"

"No. How many of them do you do a day?"

"500."

"You're lying to me."

"There are two men who live on the island, with the Colonel and me, who also do 500 push-ups alongside me, every day. Would you like to call them liars also?"

"What else do you do out there?"

"We run 5 miles before breakfast, and another 8 miles during the day. We lift weights, shoot at targets, fish, do electronic surveillance for some people we like, and a few other things. Why are you interested in making $10,000 a month?"

"Did you say in a month?"

"I don't believe I stuttered."

"What would I have to do?"

"You would have to be obsessively loyal to the man inside that room. I mean you would have to be willing to step between a bullet and him, and I am not pulling your leg. That is exactly how important he is to a very wide group of very important people. They depend on him, the way he depends on me, and the two people on the island to keep him safe."

"Anyone could get on Vancouver Island, walk up to where you live, and ambush him when he walks outside."

"That anyone would have to get past our cameras, motion detectors, heat sensors, and passive alarms to get within 500 yards of the cabin. The cabin has a wood exterior, with a 12-inch thick steel reinforced, poured concrete interior. Anyone who tries to burn us out will be sorely disappointed. Our 10,000-gallon natural gas tank is located ½ mile away from the house, and you don't want to be the guy who tries to get to the delivery line to the house. You will never see your mommy again. Water is from a well directly under the house, so no one can contaminate it, or cut off the supply. If a bad guy has thought about it, the house is protected against it."

"Holy Shit! When do I start?"

"You start when you can do 200 push-ups, you can run 8 miles, and you can shoot like a marksman at 1000 yards. Don't say it's not possible, because it is. At this moment, there are more than 800 of us, most of us are protecting the new spaceship that is being built in South Carolina. The rest of us are on details all over the world. Three of us are on detail taking care of the Colonel. Since he broke his leg this morning, I am in command, and I am going to bust his chops, for being so careless."

"Isn't that dangerous?"

"You bet your ass it is, but there's nothing he can order me to do that I am not capable of doing."

"You're very sure of yourself."

"That's why we run 5 miles before breakfast and so forth. If you really want in, I have a friend that owns the gym here in town. You will get help with your training there. I will be paying for your training."

"What's the catch, nothing is for free."

"The catch is quite simple. You're going to hate everything you do, before you quit. You going to hate me even more for telling you-you could earn $10,000 a month if you weren't so soft."

"I am not...okay, I'm soft. I'll join your club, but I won't quit. How long should it take me to work up to 200 push-ups?"

"I have to ask you a few questions first. Are you married?"

"No."

"Do you live with your parents?"

"No."

"Do you live with a girlfriend, who cooks your meals, or by yourself and cook your own meals."

"I live alone, and I know what a stove looks like."

"You will never reach 200 push-ups."

"Why?"

"Fast food will kill you. Eating out will kill you. Salt, food additives, and preservatives will kill you. Why do you think the men and women in the armed services are lean, rather than portly, and overweight?"

"They eat the food that's prepared for them?"

"The food that's prepared for them does not contain salt, food colorings, or preservatives. You probably believe the cooks in the armed services are at the bottom of the barrel. You picture them sitting out back in dirty shirts peeling potatoes, and cracking eggs. Well you're wrong. We have machines for cracking eggs, without breaking the yoke, and to peel, slice, dice, shredded, mash, and do anything else needed to a potato. You must take and pass a 3-part test to be selected to become a Chef in all the services. After successfully completing basic military training, you are sent to school to learn how to become a chef. It's an 18-month course, where they teach you everything from kitchen sanitation, to which knife to use to cut a lettuce, carrot, or a steak. It's not all classroom duty. The trainees cook thousands of meals, under the supervision of qualified chefs, while they are learning. The dishes they prepare are tested before they are served. If the chef won't eat it, a private won't get it.

'The Navy says they have the best chefs, and the best food. But it is said that an army marches on its stomach, so, we disagree with them.'

Every year the services Top-performing Chefs are judged by Renowned Food Critics from around the United States. The Top 6 Chefs are selected to compete against the Top 6 Civilian Chefs, in the United States. The Top 6 Winners of that competition compete against the Top 6 Michelin Chefs of Europe, and Asia.

It is a very prestigious competition, and military's chefs, from around the world, have scored very well. They've never won the top prize, but they have come in as high as third and fourth several times. It's not too bad a record for a man or woman, who simply wants to serve his/her country, while in uniform."

"I didn't know anything like that existed."

"Why did I start talking about that?"

"You said I would never get 200 push-ups, because I was living alone, and I didn't know how to cook."

"That's right, just look at all the money you missed out on."

"You're not even going to give me a chance?"

"Hamp, why would you try to do 2400 push-ups, and run 35 miles in a week, only to see it get thrown out the window, when it would all be lost when you pick up a coffee and doughnut for breakfast, on your way to work, eat a large meal at the hospital for lunch, and have a Wendy's 'Doublestack' Bacon cheeseburger, with a large fry, large frosty, and a cookie, for dinner, on your way home, and ice cream before you go to sleep at night?"

"Have you been spying on me?"

"No, Hamp, I've just known thousands of guys like you."

"I'll change, for that type of money, I'll change."

"Hamp don't do it. You'll try and you will fail. You'll get angry with yourself and you'll feel worse about your body."