All Comments on 'Discovery Ch. 01'

Superb technical writing skills. Give us more, please.

you spent most of the story offering information that did not further the story. The drawn out sex scene and the "we met 24 years ago" part that many writers toss in serve no purpose. In this story, a man learns his wife has made a lot of porn films and someone has tipped him off after 20 years of marriage. One sentence covers your two pages of extra words and no plot advancement. Trim the fat. You write well, but too much inane wanderings hurt the story.

We finally get a story with good character development and everyone else thinks it's too long. It is easy to get spoiled with the wham bam thank you maam stories that are all too common. I hope you have more chapters to this one!

have a talk with wife and move on.that stop blackmail and the b/s that follows crap like this.as long as the kids are his,move on.

My wife had a little silk dress that looked great on her. It was cut very low in the back with a little string tie across her shoulders to keep the dress in place. There was no way to wear a bra with this dress so her nipples left beautiful little peaks as her full breasts swayed behind the thin vail of silk. Anyway she got a wine stain on it that would not come out so the dress was finished. One day to surprise her I went into her closet to get the dress and bring it to a dress maker and have a new one made. She looked great in that dress. Thats when I found the bad in the back of her closet with all the cards and love letters from her boyfriend. Yeah I know what it's like to find something you wish you hadn't, but you can't unring a bell.

Really good read, although with quite a bit of rambling. I know, I know - character development is good. But the fundamental problem with your story is that too many things you wrote really didn't affect or concern the "discovery".

Still, great work, mate.

Good job. First the criticism; The sex scenes on the DVD went on too long a shorter description would have gotten the same job done. A little long on words in a couple of places.

Now the good part. The characters were developed very well, with good word pictures. Good plot and story line. Good flow except for a couple of wordy passages. I guess the best thing I can say about you work is that I'm waiting for the story to continue. Please hurry. Thanks for your hard work.

Looking forward to chapter 2

and am looking forward to the next chapter. This guy needs to do some research. Is his wife still doing porn? check into the more recent version of the movie. Order all her dvds to find dates of production. Are the kids his? I'd figure out some way to have dna tests done. Is she cheating? what's with the low sex drive, he mentions that her being horny is a rare occurance. I'd hire someone to look into her activities while he's out of town, after all, she's been lying to him the entire time he's known her, regarding her past career and her financial resources. Her financial resources would be a concern, surely after 25 years her porn star nest egg has been used up, has she been illicitally replenishing it? A continuation of her career or venture into prostitution maybe? What else may she be hiding? He needs to complete his research ASAP and then ask her some questions. It seems she's 'gone straight' since she left LA and assuming his investigation turns up nothing since he's met her he can go for total disclosure and ask her if she has had any simular communications. Regardless of what he's going to do with her, if his investigations show she's not been cheating or making movies/into prostitution since they met then they need to show all cards and nip the potential blackmail in the bud. Then he can let her show him why its worth his while to keep her. Again, well written and attention catching. I'm looking forward to the next chapter, hope we don't have to wait to long.

when a man finds out his wife had a history BEFORE he met her. It has absolutely nothing to do with their relationship. He should be grateful that she learned to perform such sexy acts with him after being fucked by so many virile young horny men. My husband was far more experienced that he let on before we were married, too. BOO HOO! Because of his past experiences, I have been able to discover my sexuality to the fullest and it is fan f ing

tastic I have.

He really is a shallow person to even worry about something that took place in his wife's life long before he knew her. The story seemed to be all about him, and his hurt feelings. He should be thankful that he has such a loving wife.Thanks

However, I disagree with the two previous comments. I doubt that most men wouldn't be shocked to find out that their wife had done over 50 porn flicks. Then add to that, as was stated, she had likely been a stripper, which isn't that big of a deal, but then he thought of how many also act as escorts or prostitutes. That's not a small thing. Then there is the thing that as he found out, somebody that knows him and his wife also knows this secret. Will this person try to extort money? Will this person try to extort sex? Probably not or the person would have contacted the wife not the husband, unless the person also wanted the husband to see him take his wife. Frankly, when you get right down to it, think about how screwed up we are when it comes to sex. Think about it. You marry a girl who has slept with half of your friends. So when you are sitting around watching football, is your wife looking at one of her past lovers thinking about how much better sex was with him? Maybe it was he who dumped her. Maybe he was the best she ever had and she still pines for him. Sorry, but a woman's past is somewhat relevant. We choose to ignore that fact however.

I love the way you create your characters. You have a style of building up their background. I'm eager to read the next chapter. I'm sure you will not disapoint me.

Many possible resolutions. The fact that he masturbated to the films might make him a potential cuck, but also shows that his marraige has not yet ended... There is the blackmail aspect, but it would seem to me that they ought to be working the wife, or just destroying her.

There seems to be a bit of amateur pychoanalysis evident in some of the previous comments.

I'm just appreciative of a well written story plus the promise of more to come.

Well done Bob!

Well, maybe not everyone if you actually grew up with the other person. But, unless you were with them every day all day long (what about her family vacations, other trips for school, scouts, etc) you can't know everything about another person's past.

She has chosen you to be with. Does the past really matter that much?

Sure the letter is an issue - someone else knows - but once the past is discussed, that person has little power.

Nice writing - wanders a bit too much - could be tightened up as others have written - but nice story with a promise of more. Thanks for sharing.

I know it was way in the past but she must have thought somewhere down the line her past might have been discovered. That's the big failure in this tale. Still intriguing enough to see it through.

Thanks for the offering.

But I certainly think you're on to something.

However - 1. concatenation - the state of being linked together as in a chain; union in a linked series

connectedness, connection, link - the state of being connected; "the connection between church and state is inescapable"

2. concatenation - the linking together of a consecutive series of symbols or events or ideas etc; "it was caused by an improbable concatenation of circumstances"

connection, connexion, connectedness - a relation between things or events (as in the case of one causing the other or sharing features with it); "there was a connection between eating that pickle and having that nightmare"

3. concatenation - a series of things depending on each other as if linked togetherconcatenation - a series of things depending on each other as if linked together; "the chain of command"; "a complicated concatenation of circumstances"

chain

catena - a chain of connected ideas or passages or objects so arranged that each member is closely related to the preceding and following members (especially a series of patristic comments elucidating Christian dogma)

daisy chain - (figurative) a series of associated things or people or experiences

series - similar things placed in order or happening one after another; "they were investigating a series of bank robberies"

4. concatenation - the act of linking together as in a series or chain

joining, connexion, connection - the act of bringing two things into contact (especially for communication); "the joining of hands around the table"; "there was a connection via the internet"

Based on WordNet 3.0, Farlex clipart collection. © 2003-2012 Princeton University, Farlex Inc.

I think you want to review your thesaurus.

on the map!!! First story ive read thats referenced Durham

What a great combination of "what if" and intrigue!

I could envision it: Would I be excited - dissapointed?

Please write more

He wanks to his wife getting fucked by strangers!! Don't he realise that others know that his wife was a slut?! What does that make to his family?? He is a cuckold/wimp like the author!!!

All I can say is I sure hope who ever is 'publishing' the stories you've taken down has a good fuckin editor. It is atrocious and to have the nerve to 'edit' Andyhm's writing, after reading this, it's no wonder the one I just read of Andyhm's in romance was so bad.

More cuckold propaganda not very well disguised as a story.

He is seriously fucked up in th ehead. Good story forget the asshole of LIT!

Cuck-A-Mania,it's running wild!

Might as well make a film where she bites off hubby's chubby and swallows it down followed by his balls as a chaser!

Guys like this need to be gang-banged by several BIG-dicked jig-a-boos with everyone he knows getting a copy of the film.

Sick shit,man!

What husband would be worried about his wife if the video he found had been shot decades earlier. Of course if she is suddenly deep throating his entire cock he might wonder who she has been practicing on

Another wimpy

Quit reading

I want to know All that even slightly concerns me. That way I can make informed choices

Despicable are people who want to hide from facts. Service ran across need to know basis. Thought it was idiotic and still do today. Had CO who basically agreed with me and would just tell me to cover ears (not really covering them) and go on with the discussion

Yes, the guy is an idiot, but it is a very good story. He realized he deluded himself about her and had ignored obvious hints that she was far from innocent when he met her.

She told him she lost her virginity at 14 and was wild in high school. At a rate of 3 per school year, that gives her at least 12 guys prior to going to LA. She's gorgeous. Unlikely she became chaste in LA. 6 years to work her way through UCLA. She told him she had 2 serious relationships there. Common sense indicates she was with 25 - 30 men while in LA. So the idiot was okay with Kim giving it away 40+ times prior to meeting him but NOW is concerned she may have made some money doing it? Hadn't he ever wondered how Kim had become so proficient in 'deep throating' him or gained her extensive nasty ability at 'dirty talk'?

I understand he is in shock at his discovery, but he should try to ignore it. Don't confront Kim. If anything, sometime when she talks dirty during sex, ask her, with a questioning but innocent expression, to tell you how she gained her remarkable vocabulary.

Whether Kim was with 42 or 142 men prior to him doesn't matter. Either way, it was not 3 or 4 guys in deep relationships.

Learning something about a spouse that you never expected or wanted to know can be a real shock. I had been married three years and had a four month old son. We had gone to my wife's parents house in another state for a week long visit. I was sitting on their couch and saw an old Bible in a bookcase. I started to look at it and saw that it had been my wife's grandmother's. Paging through it I saw verses that had been underlined and various obituaries and birth announcements that had been cut out of newspapers. Then I saw a wedding announcement. I started to read it and received the shock of my life. My wife had been married 4 years before we met and had neglected to tell me. Her family had never mentioned it, assuming that my wife had told me of her past marriage. The marriage had lasted 2 years before a divorce. I decided not to make a big scene at my in-laws house so did not mention it during our visit. I asked myself whether it mattered that she had been married before me. She was now the mother of my child. I thought we loved each other. I also wondered what else I didn't know about her. I decided to wait until we got home to talk about us.