Finding You Bk. 02: Paradigm Shift

The instant he slipped inside, Marcus shuddered from the electric frisson that sizzled along his cock and coiled like a live wire in his belly, sparking and crackling with energy. The most bizarre idea occurred to him that his alter ego had suddenly sprung to life and was squirming and writhing in excitement, somersaulting in his chest and slithering through his innards until its mouth lay just behind the root of his cock. As Tabby sucked his shaft deep into the back of her mouth, he imagined a stream of energy, white hot and incandescent, flooding out of her throat and sucked into the gaping maw of his beast, making its eyes glow a brilliant sun-bright yellow.

Marcus' heart rammed against his ribs, he blinked rapidly, briefly unable to discern the vision from reality. Pleasure built around the shower of sparks in his belly, a wild fire that roared along every nerve and jumped from synapse to synapse, lighting him up with pure, male vigor.

"Jesus, fuck, angel. Your amazing mouth will be the death of me." He groaned, thrusting his hips so that it forced her to take almost his entire length. She was already getting better at accommodating his size. As he inched his cock further down her throat he could feel her trying to relax and fight the urge to gag, holding it back for a few seconds longer before her natural reflex overcame her tenuous control. He watched her carefully and when the first signs of real distress darkened her face, he eased back, juddering at the shock as she desperately pulled cool air around his hot, wet cock and into her lungs.

He was so close. "Take my balls in your hand, little one. Squeeze me while I fuck your throat." He hissed as her warm hand clasped his sack and she massaged his testicles with probing fingers. She gazed up at him, eyes watering as he slid his cock along her tongue slowly. Once again, she relaxed her throat muscles and he thrust forward until her plump lips pressed against his abdomen. Marcus inched back and she gulped a breath just before he drove forward faster this time. He was right on the edge and thrust faster and faster, feeling her muscles spasm and flutter around his invading shaft and streams of glistening saliva, that she was unable to swallow, dribbled from the corners of her mouth.

"That's it, angel. Fuck me, you feel so good around me. Suck hard, baby, I'm almost there," he grunted, holding her head with both hands and preventing her escape.

Finally, with a groan that seemed to come from the deepest reaches of his being, Marcus jerked as ecstasy exploded in his belly and his cock began releasing his seed deep into Tabby's throat. Time seemed to slow and Marcus' brain floated in bliss for a few seconds before he felt the claws of another eerie vision sink into him and draw him into it.

Just as he'd seen his beast sucking energy from Tabitha earlier, this time he saw that same pristine, white energy spilling from his beast's mouth, travel down into his balls and blend with a darker, grittier life force - his own, he realised. What emerged from his cock, in the form of his semen, was a more powerful version of Tabby's own energy, combined and strengthened with the addition of his own essence. It flowed into her body where Marcus could see it spread like molten lava into her veins, replenishing the energy he had taken from her. His beast roared with possessive pride, he was feeding his woman with his own energy, marking every cell in her body with traces of him and forming an insubstantial, yet vital link between the two of them that Marcus couldn't understand. It was real though, Marcus could feel Tabby's presence pulsing along that link as if she had taken up residence inside him.

The vision cleared as his balls expelled the last of his semen and he reluctantly withdrew from Tabby's slack mouth. He immediately searched for that vibrant link to her, but all he could find was a dim echo of the powerful connection he had felt.

Had any of it been real?

He honestly didn't know, it had felt so real at the time, even though he knew it couldn't have been. Marcus briefly wondered if he was possibly losing his mind. First, his unnaturally strong attraction to Tabitha had thrown him and now he was seeing, hearing and feeling things that seemed to come from a separate entity inside of him. If that didn't define crazy, he really didn't know what did.

The instant he looked down at his angel, none of that craziness mattered. She looked stunned and a little dazed, as if she were drugged, but then her confusion cleared and that sweet smile, the one that he was coming to crave so much, spread across her cherry red lips and Marcus' worries disappeared. Tabby surprised him by leaning forward and placing a reverent kiss on his softening dick as if she was thanking him for using her so roughly.

"Thank you, Sir." She bowed her head and rested her cheek on Marcus' knee, too tired to keep her head upright any longer. Her adoration humbled Marcus to his very core and he felt a hot surge of emotion hammer at the walls that encased his heart. Something wanted out, but instead of allowing it to flow; Marcus instinctively reinforced his defenses until he couldn't feel the pressure any more. He wasn't even aware that he had just smothered the love that wanted to burst out of him; his fear was just too strong and too ingrained into him to permit it.

Unsettled, Marcus caressed the damp hair on her head and winced as a wave of guilt hit him, making him feel like a complete asshole. "I'm a very bad man, aren't I, angel?" he murmured regrettably.

Tabby stiffened and sat up, staring at him with confusion clouding her eyes. "Why would you say that, Sir?"

"Because we were supposed to be helping you cope with the drop and here I am, taking advantage of you. I am sorry, angel, forcing myself on you wasn't what I had been planning. Seeing that collar around your neck, where I have dreamt of seeing it more times than you can imagine in the past month, had more of an effect on me than I expected. You looked so much like a dream that I needed to feel some part of you around me so that I would know you were real."

Tabby wrapped her arms around Marcus' waist and hugged him tightly to her. "You didn't force me to do anything, I wanted to serve you." She picked up his palm and pressed it to the center of her chest where he could feel the rapid cadence of her heart. "Feel me, Marcus. I. Am. Real. You've claimed me and I'm not going anywhere."

"Thank you, my sweet angel. You don't know how badly I needed to hear that from you," he smiled, stroking her cheek.

She pulled away and looked questioning at Cooper. "Do you want me to serve you as well, Sir?" she asked.

He shook his head. "No need, little one. As much as I'm sorely tempted to accept your offer, I think that you've had enough for one night. What I would love from you though, is a cuddle." He opened his arms and Tabby got off her knees and climbed into his embrace. He closed his arms around her and buried his face into the shallow dip where her shoulder met her neck. "I will never get tired of holding you, kitten," he breathed against her skin.

"I like being held, Sir," she giggled and then sobered as a sudden reality check shook her.

Cooper felt the tremor rock her against him and pulled her back in concern. Her face was tense and she looked lost as her eyes bounced between him and Marcus. "Hey, what's wrong, kitten?"

"I don't want to leave. In here, we are protected from the world beyond that door." She pointed to Marcus' front door with a trembling finger, fighting the burning tears she could feel stinging her eyes. Her emotions were so volatile and swung from one extreme to the next without warning. "I'm afraid of what's going to happen when I leave this bubble we've created. Everything happened so fast that I haven't had time to think or work out the logistics!" Tabby's words tumbled out of her as her panic rose. "I've never done anything like this before. I don't know what to do!"

Marcus rushed to hold her and reassure her and Cooper hugged her tighter to him. "Do you trust us, angel?" Marcus asked her gently.

"Yes," she replied weakly.

"Then all you need to do is take our hands, we've got you and we won't let anything happen to you." Marcus wrapped one of his hands around her left hand, Cooper took her right, and they held her securely. "We will figure out the details, love. All you need to do is come along for the ride."

Though easier said than done, Tabby nodded, choosing to have faith in her two new lovers and forced her worries to fade into the background noise of her mind. In her heart, she knew that she wanted what they were offering; it was just her insecurities getting in the way. She squeezed their hands back and they instantly enveloped her into their arms, surrounding her with the comfort and stability that they offered.

With their arms around her and their masculine scents mingling into a fragrance that her body was already craving like an addict, Tabby was aware that she had already become attached to these two powerful, sexy men - so attached, that she might actually be well on her way to falling in love with them.

Marcus' hands at the back of her neck startled her and she sat up quickly, her hands flying to the buckle of her collar that he was fiddling with. "No!" she panicked, "I don't want to take it off! Did I do something wrong?" The tears she had been fighting broke free and spilled down her cheeks.

"Hey, hey," Cooper soothed. "You didn't do anything wrong, kitten. He is just removing your collar so that we can take you home."

"This collar will remain with us, angel. When we are together, Cooper or I will collar you and remove it when our time is up. It's not something that you could wear out in the vanilla world without attracting unwelcome attention."

The collar slipped from her neck and Tabby felt an immediate hollowness in her chest at its absence. Her fingers traced the skin where it had lain and something inside her grieved for its loss. "I liked wearing it, Sir," she said quietly.

Cooper retrieved the velvet bag that her collar had come in and passed it to her. "Then you should double check inside, I think that you missed something before, kitten."

CHAPTER 75

Tabby took the bag and stuck her hand inside, groping around to find what she'd missed. Stuck into the bottom corner was another, smaller pouch and she pulled it out. It was a twin to the larger bag, but only a quarter of the size.

"Open it, angel," Marcus encouraged, his blue green eyes twinkling with anticipation.

Picking at the delicate, golden string that secured the bag, Tabby unwound it and dumped out the contents into her palm. Silver sparkled catching the light from the lamps and for a minute, Tabby wasn't sure what she was looking at. When realization dawned, she gasped and smiled, picking up the necklace and holding it before her eyes so that she could see the pendant suspended between the two halves.

Three hearts joined side by side - the ones on the left and right were larger, thicker and made of gold while the smaller, more delicate heart in the center was made of silver. The center heart intertwined with the outer hearts in a way that gave the impression that its more sturdy partners were somehow protecting it.

She knew what those hearts represented and it filled her with love.

Marcus - me - Cooper - one heart for each of us.

"It's gorgeous," she said, her face shining with happiness.

Marcus grinned slyly, taking the necklace from her hand and placing it at her throat. Cooper took the ends and secured it around her neck so that it lay like a choker, flush against her skin. "You didn't think we'd send you out into the world without some reminder of who owns you now, did you, angel?"

"I...I wasn't sure what to expect, Sir."

"This is to stay on you at all times, kitten. Unless a doctor orders it off, only Marcus or I can remove it, understand?"

She nodded slowly, infatuated with her new collar. "Yes, Sir."

"Good girl. To the vanillas, that will pass as a piece of jewelry, but to anyone in the lifestyle, they'll instantly know what it means," Marcus explained, tracing the shapes of the hearts and pressing them into her skin.

"That I'm claimed," Tabby finished for him.

"That you are owned, little one," Cooper corrected empathically. Hopefully for forever. He added silently.

"Time to go home, angel," Marcus said quietly, breaking the spell that had befallen the trio.

Tabby grimaced, her disappointment evident in the reluctance of her muscles to want to move off Cooper's lap, but she detached herself and walked slowly to the door. Thankfully, Petra had had the foresight to pack her a pair of cream coloured Keds so that she didn't have to struggle with the heels she'd worn to the club.

She owed her friend a huge thank you for all she'd done as well as a smack for keeping the knowledge of Marcus' plans from her. Considering how the night, and day, had turned out, Tabby figured she could forgive her for withholding the information.

A mere twenty-four hours ago, Tabby had been painfully single, afraid and one-step away from becoming a hermit. Now, she belonged to not one, but two beautiful, caring and amazing men and suddenly her entire future looked completely different. Where there had been a huge void in front of her to look forward to, now that empty space was a riot of possibilities. The thought of being without either of them had her tripping into an emotional pothole, dreading waking up every morning, alone in her bed. In the blink of an eye, she had gone from being lonely to being part of a triad and didn't want to return to her sad existence.

Tabby gave herself a mental shake, chalking up the depression as part of the subdrop she that she still was experiencing. The wild mood swings were giving her whiplash and she couldn't wait for her hormones to settle back to normal. She reminded herself that she had lots of good things to look forward to now, and a bunch of awesome memories to keep her company while she was on her own. She had no valid reason to be depressed. In fact, her life was looking up. Now all she needed to do was to find a job and she'd have no complaints.

"You okay there, angel?" Marcus asked, watching the gamut of emotions play out on her face. Happy, sad, hopeful, determined. All flashed by one after the other as she processed her scrambled emotions into something that made sense.

"Hmm," she replied, distracted. "Oh, sorry, I'm okay, Marcus, I just wish this emotional rollercoaster ride would hurry up and be done."

"Dealing with subdrop is a real bitch, kitten. But now that we know how badly it affects you, Cooper and I will keep a closer eye on you after we play." He ruffled her hair and grinned at her. "I don't suppose that you're going to object to being pampered by us, now are you?"

She started to smile back, but broke out into a huge yawn instead. "No, Sir," she giggled tiredly.

"I think it's time to take our girl home. You coming for the ride, Coop?"

Cooper was already off the sofa and striding to the door. "And miss the opportunity to tuck our girl into bed? I don't bloody think so!" he laughed and grabbed Tabby's duffle bag up off the floor. "C'mon, kitten. Let's get you home, you look like you're going to fall asleep on your feet."

As if on cue, Tabby yawned again and covered her mouth up in embarrassment. "Sorry!" she mumbled, but had to admit that now that the evening's activities had wound down, she was positively exhausted.

Cooper slid his free arm around the back of her waist and escorted her out the front door and to Marcus' SUV. With a click of his key fob, Marcus deactivated the alarm and unlocked the doors so that Cooper could help Tabby into the back seat. "Do you want me to drive?" he offered to Marcus.

That was when the dynamic between the two men became apparent to Tabby. Though they were both dominant males, Marcus was definitely the natural Alpha of the two, with Cooper acting as his Beta - dominant in his own right but deferring to Marcus whenever the opportunity arose. Other than the playful teasing she had witnessed between the two men, Tabby never got the sense that there was competition or jealousy between the two men. What she did see was Cooper's absolute trust that Marcus would always include him as an equal, even when he wasn't.

It helped her to see the pair in a different light and somehow that made her love them even more. It also explained some of the intensity in Marcus' personality. He carried a lot of responsibility on his shoulders by taking on the role of an alpha male, and whether he realized it or not, it affected his demeanor. He could be deadly serious or almost child-like when he allowed his guards to lighten up, but he was always in control.

Marcus may have believed that he had lost control with her previously, but Tabby knew better. Even though she hadn't known the man for long, her instincts told her that he was too disciplined to forget how to behave that easily. He may have thought that he had lost control, and it may have even felt that way to him, but she suspected that it was his inner beast- that primal side of his psyche that he believed to be safely chained up inside of him - temporarily breaking out of its cage and exerting its power. Marcus had simply embraced the wild abandon of his alpha side without realizing it, but his inherent care for her had prevented him from doing anything that would truly have harmed her.

She wondered if Marcus even knew that that was happening or if he was unaware of the other side of his personality. It didn't matter either way to Tabby, she loved both sides of the man, her heart and brain loved his gentle, caring side and her body craved the dragon that lived in his soul. She only hoped that there'd be no eventual fall out from him keeping a big part of his personality repressed.

"Naw," Marcus shook his head, and opened the driver's side door. "I'll drive. You can enjoy her company on the ride." He glanced over the seat and found Tabby looking sleepy and deep in thought. "Though I think she's gonna be lights out long before we get her home."

"We've tired the poor thing out," Cooper agreed. "And fuck, if I can't wait to do it again!"

"Me too, buddy."

"I can hear you guys, you know!" Tabby called out irritably from the back seat. Despite her fatigue, she still didn't want to leave Marcus' house and wasn't looking forward to being alone in the apartment again. It was making her feeling unsettled and grumpy.

Marcus laughed and gave his friend a wink. "Good luck buddy."

Cooper climbed into the backseat and gave Tabby a stern look. "You gonna behave, little kitten, or am I going to have to take you over my knee?"

She shrank away from him and had the sense to look embarrassed by her outburst. "Sorry, Cooper. I'm just tired, I guess."

Cooper kissed her on the lips and gave her a smile that told her that he really wasn't upset with her. "Apology accepted, sweetness. It's been a real whirlwind of a weekend for you and there hasn't been a lot of sleep." He winked at her and she blushed, remembering the numerous reasons why she hadn't gotten the rest she'd needed. "That's why you need to go home now, love. Not because we don't want to keep you with us, but because you need time to decompress and sleep."

She nodded and settled into her seat as Marcus started the engine and backed down his long driveway. Tabby looked out the window for a while as they drove through Marcus' neighborhood when a question that she'd been curious about suddenly came into her mind.

CHAPTER 76

"Cooper?" she ventured. "Can I ask you a question?"

Cooper cocked his head and gave her his full attention. "Always, little one."