Forget Me Not

I sighed, stood up and dropped them, kicking them into a corner. Then I stood there, somewhat self-consciously. She rinsed herself clean, turned off the water, and grabbed her towel. She climbed out of her shower, took a step, and another step, and took me in her hand as she reached me. She let out a throaty, appreciative groan as she lifted a leg onto the toilet seat. I looked down between us, and shuddered as she rubbed my shaft over and around her moist and now perfectly slick lips.

"I really do wish I was safe," she said, softly. "I would bend over right here and have you in me."

"I wish I had anything that would let me do that," I groaned. "I want to be in you so much."

"Next time. I promise. Next time, we will be with each other properly."

I dropped my hand down to her gloriously smooth lips, and she gasped as I spread her with my fingers. She stared up at me, clutching me as I slowly slid a fingertip along her, parted her, a small frown forming as I slipped a finger into her.

I teased myself into her once, twice, then pulled back, raised my fingers to my lips and licked them. Then, in one movement, I dropped down in front of her, clasped her bum in my hands and pulled her against me.

"Daniel..." she gasped.

I didn't care. My tongue was on her clit, the taste and scent of her filling my nose and mind. She clenched her hands in my hair, groaning, writhing against me, her thigh tensing against my cheek. Each slow lick I gave her made her squirm. She was soaking, delicious; her lips soft and warm under my tongue. I teased the tip of my tongue around the nub of her small, firm clitoris.

She was panting now, little desperate noises. She ground my face against her mons as she hunched against me.

I curled my tongue over, along her entrance, trying to probe into her but failing. The angle was wrong. Erika didn't seem to care, I could hear the almost desperate subvocal moaning, some profanities - but I wasn't really paying attention. I forced my mouth against her, sucked gently on her, reveling in the way she ground herself against me.

"Danny... Danny... Danny..." she begged in plaintive gasps. "Bitte... ich... ich flehe dich... Danny..."

And then she convulsed forward, stomach spasming hard against my forehead as her orgasm took her. I timed my licks to her contractions, tortured her, and she tried to get away without getting away, clutched at my scalp, clamped her thighs on my cheeks, and eventually, crying out, managed to tear herself away from me. She slumped against the sink, still shuddering, staring up at me, mouth agape, gaze only partly focussed.

Slowly, she straightened.

"Oh... oh... oh god..." she whimpered. "I... Danny... I can't stand up... help... please..."

I got my arms under her shoulders and gently helped her up. She leaned in against me, still trembling with the body-shaking aftershocks of her orgasm. She kissed me roughly, clamped her arms around me, and simply refused to let go.

.:.

We'd pushed the two mattresses together in the centre of her floor. Erika had self-consciously pulled on a clean pair of panties, claiming, with a small smile, that she had to defend herself against me. I'd stayed nude; it was pointless even trying to disguise my erection, and as I observed to her we'd already seen just about everything of one another.

She lay hard against me, her head resting on my arm, watching me, gently stroking a hand up and down my chest.

"Are you ok?"

"Yes," she whispered. "Just wish you would let me do something about this problem of yours."

"You already did once. And it was amazing. The problem is that I want to put it in you, and I'm worried that if you start something now we'll end up doing just that."

"You are probably right," she sighed. "Because I am aching for you. I wouldn't be able to control myself. "

"I feel like I'm sixteen again. Like I can't catch my breath. Like... we're in an abandoned classroom and we have two minutes before someone finds us..."

"Also."

"Anyway," I muttered, "it will go away. If it doesn't, I'll... shit, I don't know. Punch myself or something."

She snuggled in closer, threw her leg over me, pressing it to my hard cock. "You are a very understanding man. Most would think they deserved sex after tonight."

"I don't believe I deserve anything. I want whatever you give me to be a gift, not an obligation."

She kissed the line of my jaw. "I am glad I grew to know you."

"Me too."

She sighed, settled back. "I am not going to be able to work tomorrow. It is impossible. I will be too busy thinking about this. About you."

"Me neither. My day only starts when you're leaving. I have to survive to midnight, when the only place I want to be is in your arms."

"I will come past your office to kiss you goodnight."

I stared down at her. "That... that would be really nice."

"It is the least I can do for such an amazing orgasm."

I snorted, and she grinned a tired grin at me.

"Come," she sighed once more, after a silence. "We must try to sleep."

She rolled away from me, pushed back. "Spoon me? Please?" she said, hopeful.

"Of course."

I rolled over, got my penis arranged so it intruded as little as possible. She snorted softly at that, wriggled her bum gently back against me, then lay still as I crawled in against her.

"I have missed this," she breathed.

"I have missed you."

"Sleep well, Danny."

I kissed her neck. "You too, Erika."

"Wake me up if that... thing... doesn't go to sleep."

"Hah."

I buried my nose in her hair. My cock ached, but I ignored it, forced it away, an annoyance to be disregarded given the more present reality of the beautiful woman I held in my arms.

Erika's breathing slowed, grew deeper. I closed my eyes, slowly matched her breathing.

Somehow, sometime, I eventually fell asleep.

.:.

It had been a long day. I'd kissed Erika goodbye as she climbed onto her bus, then made my slow commute home. I'd cat-napped through the day, amused by the infrequent but appreciated messages she sent me. Then I'd woken for "breakfast" and started to get ready for my "day".

I leaned against the bus window, watching the world go by as it crawled in towards the city. Erika would be finishing work right about now. She'd be leaving the office, catching the tube south as far as it would go and then her bus. I wondered what her plans were for the evening. Probably an early night to make up for our disturbed sleep the night before.

I climbed off at my stop, turned left, then right, and entered the building. Bill gave me a wide smile.

"Danny, son. Enjoy your night off?"

"Yeah, Bill, thanks for that. It was just what I needed."

"Good. Quiet day today. Hopefully you'll have a quiet night too." Bill stood and handed me the pager.

"Hopefully," I agreed. I put down my bag and sunk into the battered chair. "Have a nice night, Bill."

"You too, lad. The missus is cooking me steak. She's going to nag me about the conservatory again, I can feel it in my bones."

I laughed, and waved him off home. Then I settled back into the chair, wondering what it was like to have someone to go home to.

I sighed and opened my books, staring down at them with something close to hatred. I opened a notebook, selected a page of exercises, and started to work through them, pausing occasionally to rub my temples or curse myself once more for my idiotic course selection.

Someone kissed the top of my head.

I jerked, startled, and looked up.

"Erika!"

She grinned down at me, and then slid back down off the countertop. "Hallo."

I stood and stepped around the desk; she squeaked as I pulled her unceremoniously into a bear hug. She wrapped her arms around me as she burrowed in under my chin. Then she pushed back and looked up at me, amused. "You did not even see me waving."

I shrugged, embarrassed. "Calculus," I muttered. "I'm an imbecile. I should never have chosen it."

"You will be fine, Danny, I promise," she said, still grinning.

"You look amazing. That jacket really suits you."

"I indulged myself again." She nudged a paper bag with her toe. "I brought us supper, if you would like to eat with me."

"Oh my god, I love you."

She smiled up at me. "I was just going to go home. But... I wanted to see you. To... thank you for last night. So I came here instead."

"To thank me?"

"For being so... gentle with me."

I stared down at her. "You are welcome," I said. "But you never have to thank me for that."

"Of course I do," she countered. She rose up on the toes of her sneakers, and kissed me. "Otherwise you might think I take it for granted. And I do not."

She dropped back down, and glanced down at the desk. "Mm. So. Do you have another chair?"

"Just a stool. You take the chair, I'll take the stool."

"Maybe I should just sit on your lap," she said, with a wicked grin.

"You and I both know that is a quick way to a sticky end."

"Very sticky," she agreed. "And a long way home to clean up. Oh well. Maybe next time."

She stretched up and kissed me again. "Get your stool," she said softly, "and come eat. It will get cold."

She unpacked two Itsu pots. "It's pork and noodles and things," she said. "I hope that is ok?"

"It is a million times better than the cold leftovers I had packed for myself," I replied as I put the stool down. "Thank you, Erika."

"Bitte schön, Danny."

She sat down and let out a little happy sigh. "I like this. I like being able to meet up with you for supper. I just wish I could take you to bed afterwards."

"You're evil. Now I'm going to be working until midnight with that image in my head."

She smirked. "Good. That will keep you warm and awake."

She crossed her legs, pressing her shin against my calf as she leaned forward over her pot.

"How was your day?"

"Slow," she said as she picked up a piece of pork with her chopsticks. "But good. My junior starts soon. She looks good. The head of finance loves me. It is perfect. Everything is good. I see my girl, I see my man..." she added, pushing her leg harder against me. "Everything is starting to slowly come right."

"Your man, huh?"

"Natürlich." She smiled to herself.

"I like being your man."

"I know you do."

"I was watching Bill leaving for home earlier. And I caught myself wondering what it would be like to have someone to go home to."

"I will show you," she said, softly. She reached out and took my hand, and squeezed it briefly. "Eat, Danny."

.:.

"You will get into trouble."

"No. It's a quiet night. And I wanted to make sure you got your bus."

"Go back inside and get warm. Maybe... maybe I'll see you tomorrow for supper?"

"I would love that."

She stood up on her toes once to kiss me. "Be safe. Be warm. I will phone you when I'm home."

"Travel safe, Erika."

She smiled, and turned to climb onto her bus. I stood, watching her as she chose a seat near the back. She waved to me as the bus set off, and I sighed out a long, slow breath as I turned to make for my desk and a cup of coffee.

My phone buzzed as I got back inside. A single heart from her, and I smiled.

.:.

Dinner with Erika became the highlight of my day. She'd flounce into the building lobby, push herself hard against me as she kissed me 'good evening', then sit, smiling, leg pressed to mine as we talked about her day and ate whatever she'd brought for us to eat. She refused flat-out to let me contribute towards our dinners, insisting they were her treat and issuing the dire warning that any attempt to steal her thunder would result in me eating dry bread.

I capitulated, and she fed me, gleeful I think in her newfound financial freedom and the added liberty to spoil me. I scrounged a second chair from a storage room, and Erika would spend an hour after supper reviewing my study notes and tutoring me. Then she'd hold my hand as we walked to the bus stop, and kiss me goodnight as she caught her bus.

I couldn't recall ever being happier.

And then, on Friday as she left, she whispered "Come visit tomorrow." And that was it for my concentration for the rest of the evening.

.:.

She opened the door, and stepped forward into my arms. She clutched herself against me, and let out a soft whimper as I wrapped my own arms around her to tuck her against me. Then she let go, and rose onto her toes to kiss me. "Hallo," she breathed. "I've been waiting for you."

"Sorry. The bus was slow."

"I forgive you," she smiled. "Come. I haven't started cooking yet, so you can earn your food by helping me."

She took my hand, and pulled me across the threshold, bumping the door closed with her hip as an afterthought. She dragged me over to the kitchenette, and pushed me back against the counter to claim another kiss. "I like weekends," she declared. "I like that I can spend my evening with you. So. What would you like to eat?"

"Um..." I said, sliding my hands down her back.

"Besides me, Danny."

"Damn."

She laughed. "I have some cod, some potato chips. It is an easy meal."

"It sounds great to me."

"Also, I have some wine. Would you be helpful and open it?"

"Of course."

I reached around her, found the glasses and the waiter's friend, and pulled the cork out of the bottle. I poured us both a glass, then leaned against the counter and watched her, content.

"I like being with you," I said, after a moment. "I like... how it makes me feel, to know I have you to come to."

She slid the tray of chips into the oven. "I like being the girl you want to come to," she answered. She washed her hands, then accepted her glass of wine. "I wish I had a proper table for us, or a entertainment area, or even some free countertop and bar stools so we could just sit and talk..."

"We can stand and talk. And you can lean against me if you want to..."

"Mm. Maybe I will do that," she agreed. She moved over, rested her head against my chest. "You calm me," she said softly. "You..."

"What?"

She sighed. "You make the last few years seem less... important. You have helped me so much. I feel... blessed... that I met you when I did."

"I just feel too lucky to put into words."

She snorted. "I got the better deal."

I looked down at her. "I got a young, gorgeous, organised, driven, intelligent and motivated woman. You got a security guard."

She punched me gently in the ribs. "Do not demean yourself. Where you work is temporary. Everything else is temporary, Danny. Who you are in here..." she added, gently pushing against my chest, "That is what matters. That is what I am grateful for."

She sipped her wine. "Ilse is with Joachim and Helena this weekend. They are glamping somewhere in Glous...Glousest... scheisse, I can never pronounce the place name. Up north, like the cheese."

"Gloucestershire?"

"Yes. Normally I would be bitter. Today?" She took a breath. "Today, not so much. So. How was your day?"

"Oh, you know, the usual. Got to bed at 3am thanks to a broken down night bus, Frank the Yank woke me at six because he is incapable of being quiet, Pascal and France declared war on the United States about three past six, Joe mediated at about five past, and after that it was pointless trying to get back to sleep because of the fucking ravens."

"Literally fucking?"

"Christ only knows. They were being incredibly noisy though."

She laughed softly. "So you must be quite tired then."

"More than normal for this time on a Saturday, yes. But you know what night shifts are like."

"I am starting to forget."

"Good," I said, and I kissed the top of her head.

"Soon you will to."

"I hope so."

"And until you do, if you need somewhere quiet to sleep... well, you know where I am."

"I might take you up on that, Erika."

"You should," she breathed. She turned slightly, tucked herself under my chin, and made a small happy noise. "I am sorry it is no feast. I wanted to go buy something special for you but... I didn't get around to it."

"I love fish and chips. I'm really easy that way. You could feed me toast and I'd be happy."

"I will never feed you toast," she laughed softly. "Roostekoek maybe, though."

"When do you have Ilse again?"

"Next Friday. Do... do you want to come spend time with us?" she added, suddenly unsure.

"Yes."

"Are you... certain?"

"Yes."

She sighed out the breath she'd been holding, and said nothing more.

.:.

"Are you ready?"

I lay back on the mattress, amused. Erika had disappeared into her bathroom carrying a brown paper bag, and had refused to answer my amused questions as to what she was up to.

"Ready for what?" I answered her.

"Close your eyes," she replied, playfully.

"Closed," I called, doing as she asked.

I heard the door open, and soft footsteps approached. "Open," she said, softly.

"Jesus Christ," I breathed, after a moment.

"You like it then," she said, amused. "I indulged. Again."

"Oh my god, that is sexy."

She slid her hands down over the black lace nightdress that fell to mid-thigh. "I like lace. I... wanted something special for tonight. So I'd feel..."

She knelt down next to me. "So I'd feel pretty," she continued, softer.

"You do not need to buy clothes to make you beautiful, Erika. You're beautiful. You always have been to me."

She took my hand, touched it to her cheek. "Joachim never told me that. In all our years together."

"Well I'm not him."

"No. You aren't. And I'm glad," she added, fiercely. She threw a leg over me, then sat on my thighs. She stared down at me. "Did you remember to bring protection this time?" she asked, eyebrow raised.

"Yes."

"Good. I have waited long enough to have you in me."

She slid my hand down over her breasts, belly, and down under the hem of her nightie to her. "See?"

"Oh god. You're..."

"For you. Yes," she groaned, as I slid my fingertip along her soaking lips. "I have been aching all day. All day I knew I was going to see you. All day I knew I was going to have you. Do you have any idea how hard it is for me to walk, talk, do anything when I am aching as much as you make me ache?"

"No," I clutched her hips and arching up against her.

She growled deep in her throat, fumbling at my pants. She undid my belt, rose up on her knees and slipped me out of my underwear, holding me as I pulsed in her hand. "It is difficult," she whimpered. "I have to fight the urge to touch myself, to daydream. You. You and your body consume me. Take your clothes off, Danny. I want you to be naked with me."

She lifted herself off me, gently stroking my shaft back and forward in her hand as I awkwardly kicked my jeans and underpants down and off my legs. Then she clambered back onto me, and held herself up, stroking my head along her lips. She stared down at me. "It is so hard to be good," she complained. "I am on the pill again. But it won't be working yet. And I hate condoms so much. But... I cannot take chances. Even with you. Uhnn... Danny... don't... don't move."

She slid me between her lips, held me to her entrance.

"Erika," I groaned, toes curling at the heat of her on me.

"Uh huh," she panted. She shifted slightly, and I felt the tip of my penis part her. She stared down at me, frowning, and rocked slowly back and forward on me, slipping me just in and just out of her. "Danny," she groaned. "Danny, you had better go and find those things. I... I cannot stop. I want you in me so much."

"God you are so hot on me," I whispered. "Better... better find those..."

"Just once, bitte... just once..."

"Erika..."

And then I shuddered as she lowered herself, groaning, all the way onto me. She stared down at me, panting, as she held me deep in her.

"Condoms," I moaned. "Bag. Pocket."

"Yes," she whimpered. "But... but I wanted this..."

She slowly lifted herself off me, and reached over for my bag. As she did, the nightdress shifted and her breast peeked out. I lifted myself up, took her nipple in my mouth, and teased it with my tongue as, she dug distractedly in my bag and found the box of condoms. She tore open the box, fumbled one of the packets to me, and let out a shaky hiss as I briefly trailed my finger along her soaking lips again.