Ice Cream

I also took two days finding myself a nice new condo that I hoped to move into by Tuesday afternoon. I ordered furniture and had the cable set up after giving the complex manager a deposit. The last thing I had to do was to find a friend. I spent two days in a bbw admirer's chat room until I found just the guy I was looking for. I arranged to meet him in person and sat at a bar telling him about how great Nancy was.

I called Nancy and had her meet me at a bar I liked and had Brandon there too. I introduced them and told Nancy that he was a friend of mine. I explained to her that I was well on my way to getting my divorce, thanks to her. I also told her that my lawyer warned me against starting anything until the papers had been signed. She promised to wait for me, but I could tell by the way that she and Brandon were looking at each other that she wasn't going to.

Nancy really had been integral to my plan and I wanted her to get something out of this, so I was happy that the two of them hit it off. I liked Nancy, and I'd probably fuck her in a heartbeat but I didn't see a forever kind of love there. Monday morning I called Justine as usual to tell her good morning. She told me that she'd woken up with dark spots under her eyes, and hoped that they'd be gone when I got back. I guess that was the way she was hoping to explain whatever was left of her black eye.

"Baby," it wouldn't matter to me if you had two black eyes and looked like a raccoon," I said. "I want you so bad that we might not make it up the driveway tomorrow night.

She was really happy hearing that. She started telling me over the phone all of the things she was going to do with me. Some of them I have to admit I had never heard of. Any way I'd always gotten along great with my mother in law, so when I called her to tell her about my plan to surprise Justine with the great news that I'd been given a sales manager position and wouldn't have to travel anymore, she wanted to be there. I picked her up in the Mustang and on the way we chatted about how loud the car was and how good it felt when the acceleration pushed you back into the soft leather seats.

My timing was perfect. Apparently the tragedy that had happened just days ago with Riley hadn't slowed Justine down. Her mother was shocked as we watched Justine look around as if she was making sure that no one could see her and then slipped into the ice cream truck. She hadn't seen us because we were halfway up the neighbor's driveway behind their huge unkempt hedges.

"Why is she getting into that truck?" asked her mother. Shock was all over her face.

"I don't fucking know but, I'm going to find out," I said, pretending I was angry. Actually I knew exactly what they'd do. To keep the kids from running over to the truck, they'd drive down to the L at the end of our block. It was a dead end and not visible from the main street.

She'd be in the truck for about 10 minutes then she'd get out and jog home. That was why she always wore those fucking shorts. Maybe she also wore them because they were easy to get into and out of, but that was just my theory. We pulled in behind the truck and I got out with my mother in law hot on my heels. I yanked the door open and saw Justine straddle the ice cream man. Before I said anything two cars came screaming up beside mine. One was from the FDA the other was from the city dept of licenses.

All of us watched as Justine plunged up and down on the ice cream man only six strokes and then stood up and tried to put her shorts on.

"Aw come on baby. You promised me more this time," complained the ice cream man.

"Last week you got four strokes this week, you got six. Your math must suck because six is definitely more than four," said Justine.

"But I'm st...Oh shit," said the Ice Cream man.

"In a lot of trouble," said the man from the FDA.

"Your company is going to lose its license," said the man from the city.

"And your ass is grass Hector," said a rugged looking woman with tattoos over every bit of exposed skin except her face. The woman turned out to be his wife and the only reason he had a green card.

As I walked away from the truck Justine was screaming for me to wait. She needed to explain. As usual her next stupid statement was that it wasn't what I thought. I turned sharply and faced her.

"So you didn't just fuck the ice cream man right in front of me your mom and all of those other people?" I asked. "You didn't have sex with him in near proximity to open containers of food that are intended for children?"

"Justine how could you be so stupid?" her mother asked.

I just got into my Mustang and drove away. Justine called me a hundred and fourteen times that evening. I turned my phone off after the first one, but we live in the digital age so my iPhone's call log shows the number of times she called. Unfortunately since I'd opted for the 32gig iPhone all one hundred and fourteen messages were stored on it.

When I showed up for work the next day she was there waiting for me in the parking lot.

"Rudy, I love you so much, please let me explain," she begged. She looked like hell. She'd probably been up crying all night.

To tell you the truth, I didn't feel that damned bad. As a matter of fact seeing a person who tore your heart out by cheating on you while constantly professing their love for you, upset and hurting does wonders for your soul. I called a security guard over and told him that the woman was harassing me.

"But Rudy, isn't this your wife? The one you're always talking about and telling us all how much you love her until we're sick of fucking hearing about it," he said.

"That was yesterday," I snapped. His description of her had clearly given Justine even more insight into how much I loved her. Her head hung even lower and she started crying again.

"We're about to go through a divorce," I said. "And she can't follow me to work and bother me."

Justine collapsed and started moaning, "No divorce, please. It would kill me." Actually she didn't have to worry about that for two reasons which I'll get into later.

As I walked away the sun seemed again to be shining just a little bit brighter. After the initial meeting in the parking lot Justine simply ramped up her attempts to speak to me. She inundated everyone we knew with phone calls until they were all begging me to speak to her for the sake of the years we'd had together. That was what they claimed but in reality they all just wanted her to leave them the fuck alone too. She filled up both my personal and business email accounts with tons of letters and messages. She even started having friends of hers call me and beg me to talk to her.

Justine was determined not to go gently into that good night. Finally I agreed to speak to her one time if she'd leave me alone after that. She looked at me strangely, but agreed to it. I guess she was thinking that once we'd spoken we'd be on the path to reconciliation so she'd take that risk.

She asked me to let her know where I was staying and she'd meet me there. She could make dinner for us and everything.

I laughed in her face. "Every night, I take a different route home. I stop for a different amount of time at a different bar each time to make sure that neither you nor anyone else knows where I live," I told her.

"I'll come to your house on the night that you choose," I told her.

"God damn it Rudy it's our house not my house. I don't have a job. My name isn't even on the mortgage. All I did was pick it and my wonderful husband worked his ass off to buy it so that we and our kids can live in comfort," she said.

"Not anymore," I quipped. "Thank you for reminding me. As of tomorrow I'll file a quit claim and transfer the house to you."

"But I don't want the house," she cried. "I only want you."

"You sure have a funny way of showing me that," I snapped. "Justine if I'm so wonderful why did you cheat on me?"

"Rudy, it wasn't cheating," she said. Her eyes filled with tears again.

"Like I said," I told her. "I'll come to your house any night you want. Let's see yesterday was ice cream day. Today was garbage man. Tomorrow is mail man, and Thursday is the day you get your packages delivered. Which day should I come?"

She started crying again and told me that I just didn't understand it. If I would just listen to her everything would be alright.

"Everything will be alright for who Justine?" I asked. "How is any of this ever going to be alright for me? Is you explana tion going to somehow take away my pain and erase the memory of seeing all of those men stick their dicks into my wife?"

I guess Justine hadn't thought that far yet, she just looked down. I just wanted to have the fucking talk and get this all over with.

"Which night would you like me there?" I repeated.

"Tonight, please," she said in a very small voice. "I can't take another night away from you."

When I got to the house that evening I have to admit it felt good to be there. Justine was waiting for me as I pulled up and she'd gone all out. She had on a light sun dress that stopped about four inches above her knees. Her legs were tanned as usual and she'd done her hair and makeup like we were going out on the town.

"I'm so glad you're home," she said, grabbing my arm.

I could already smell the pepper steak cooking and my favorite beef rice as well. We sat down on the couch and as her legs parted and the dress rose I could see that she wasn't wearing any panties.

"Easy Access," she said as she watched me looking.

"Let's get to it," I said. "Start talking, the sooner you have your say the sooner I'm gone."

"No," she snapped. "Fuck that. You told me I could explain, so I need to do it my way. There are some things we'll have to compromise on but this is my meeting."

I just nodded and looked at my watch.

"Why are you looking at your watch?" she asked.

"I might have a date," I smirked. Her face fell again. Despair was written all over it. But then she just smiled and said, "Well you'd better cancel it because you're going to be here for a while." I just rolled my eyes at her.

"We're going to have a nice dinner, TOGETHER," she said. "Then we'll go and sit on the couch in front of the fireplace and you can fuck me. Then we'll talk. I'll explain my side of things and the way I see it and you can respond. Then we'll fuck again and go to sleep. Then if you really think we'll need it we can go to counseling."

"I agree to dinner," I said. "It'll probably be the last time I get this meal, so I may as well enjoy it. There will be no sex, before during or after. Hell, more than likely never again. I'm not sleeping here. This is not my home anymore. Shit I can't believe I'm sitting on this fucking couch where you f..."

Her eyes widened in shock and her hand went in front of her face. "How long have you known?" she asked.

"When I came back from Chicago, I caught you getting into the ice cream truck," I said.

"So you really didn't have a groin pull? You just didn't want to sleep with me," she hissed. "No wonder. I was going out of my mind trying to figure out why you wouldn't kiss me anymore. And you haven't told me you love me since then either." She started crying again.

I couldn't help it. I hugged her. I was trying to look at this evening like that exit interview you do with your high school guidance counselor just before you graduated All of your grades are in and you've made it, but the two of you just sit back and discuss what happened to you over the previous four years and how both of you saw them. You saw yourself as being a solid well liked student in the middle of the pack. She saw you as a lazy isolated underachiever who could have been a great student and very popular if you'd just gotten your head out of your ass and applied yourself.

Justine put the food onto the plates and I noticed that instead of us sitting across from each other, she'd seated us right next to each other across a corner of the big table. She held my left hand in hers as we both ate with our right hands. It was really fucking romantic, us sitting there holding hands, not letting go for anything, with only a single scented candle to illuminate us. For the half hour or so that we ate, I tried to put the past behind us. I brushed her hair off of her face and looked into those eyes that I had loved for half of my life and suddenly I was crying too.

After dinner we walked hand in hand over to our sofa. I lit a fire in the fireplace while she leaned against me from behind pressing her tiny breasts into my back. God I wanted her right then. But I knew that I couldn't under any circumstances. It turned out to be a night of lies and confusion. She was perfectly honest with me but she was either stupid or confused. I lied repeatedly.

She asked me if I'd had anything to do with the garbage man's savage beating. He'd also lost his job and was being sued by the city for the cost of the truck. He'd lost both testicles and would walk with a limp for the rest of his life. He had only partial sight in one of his eyes and no feeling due to nerve damage in his hands. I told her that not only was I not responsible for it, until she'd told me about it I didn't know anything about it.

She brought up the mail man. I asked her what had happened to him. She told me about him being mauled by the pit bull. His injuries were too numerous to mention. I asked her when it had happened and reminded her that we'd been on the phone at that time or shortly before. The same thing with the NPS driver whose wife was suing her, we'd been on the phone, she'd actually hung up on me to go and fuck him. Her eyes widened when I spat out the word "fuck."

"Nope, none of those are my style," I told her. "The only person I did anything to was you and the ice cream man. It was totally non-violent. He got a slap on the wrist for what he did. You got embarrassed for your part in it. The only person who really lost was me."

"Embarrassed is putting it lightly," she said. "My own mother refuses to speak to me. All of our friends act like I'm some terrible whore and none of our neighbors will even speak to me. Word is getting around too. That nice little market I buy fruit and vegetables in. The owner asked me not to come back there. It seems that a delegation of the neighborhood busy bodies got together to tell him that they would not purchase any fruits vegetables or anything else that I'd been in contact with. This town isn't that big."

"As far as the Ice Cream man's slap on the wrist, he was fired. He's getting a divorce which will lead to him being deported. His bosses lost their licenses on all of their trucks so they'll probably go out of business. That was a pretty big slap for nothing."

"You said that the only person who lost something was you. I don't see it. You're not even that upset. And you're ready to just move on and forget me. I don't think I could ever get over you, I can't eat. I can't sleep and I keep crying over you. I open a closet and see a jacket and I remember when we bought it and how you looked in it and I just cry and cry until I have no tears left. What exactly did you lose?"

"I lost you Justine," I said. "I lost the most important thing in my life. Since the sixth fucking grade you're all I ever think about. The human brain processes millions of thought impulses per second. Half of mine are about you. I lost my wife, my lover, my partner, my best friend, my dream girl and the mother of my children all at the same God damned time. You lost four guys, none of whom you cared enough about to even learn their fucking names. I lost six women and I loved every fucking one of them. Who wins in that comparison? Then there's the worst part Justine. I sit here right now and I can see the kids we would have had that will never be born now. So basically you and your fuck buddies murdered the kids you're dying to have?"

Justine spends a lot of time lying in the sun to get her perfect tan. The Melanin in her skin must have immediately reverted though that's impossible because she turned whiter than I've ever seen her. She started crying again.

"Can you see them Justine? We were so close to having them," I said. I leaned closer to her and looked deeply into her eyes as I continued I really wanted her to understand what she was giving up to fuck a bunch of strangers. "I can see a girl who'd be almost a carbon copy of you. She'd have been popular and a cheerleader but she'd fall in love with a guy who'd treat her right all of her life. She'd have picked her boyfriends because they loved her and she loved them, not because they were popular or on the team. God Damn it, we would have had beautiful grandkids Justine. Let's not talk about our son. Unless that boy won the lottery we'd have to support him forever. What a fucking disappointment."

"I think he'll be fine," she said. "That's exactly what they used to say about you and you turned out okay."

"I guess we'll never know because neither he or his siter will ever be born, because their mother couldn't keep her fucking legs closed," I snapped. "I lost you, we lost them. I hope you're happy Justine."

"Damn it Rudy. You are so wrong!" she screamed, her face had reddened instantly and tears filled her eyes. "You didn't lose shit. You didn't lose me. I'm right here in front of you begging you on my hands and knees to take me back. You're the only man I've ever loved. Why the hell can't you see that?" she was sobbing louder with each word.

"Justine if you loved me you wouldn't have fucked those five guys," I said.

"What five," she asked. "There were only four, the garbage man, the NPS guy, the mail carrier and the ice cream man."

Justine still wasn't coming clean. She assumed I didn't know about Mario. Well if she didn't want to bring him up, why should I.

"I didn't fuck any of them," she snapped. "I told you not to long ago that you were the only man to ever put his seed in me and I was telling you the truth."

"Justine, I know what I saw," I said.

"You saw them stick their little dicks in my pussy," she snapped. "All they got to do was touch. Okay they got to touch the inside of my pussy. Not one of them ever got more than six strokes then I'd pull them out of me. I never let any one of them cum in me because that's your job. I never let any one of them give me an orgasm because that's your job. It was just touching. I know it was bad but we didn't go all the way Rudy. It was just a game. All they ever did was to warm me up for you. If a single one of them ever meant anything to me why would I be so in control of myself and them that I could actually count the number of strokes I gave them and make them stop? The only man who ever makes me lose control is you, doofus."

I was horrified. I couldn't believe that a grown woman, my woman at that could be so God damned stupid. My jaw just flapped involuntarily but words wouldn't form.

"Justine, your ass must be jealous of the shit coming out of your mouth," I said, finally. "Whether done to completion or not sex is sex. You and I both took vows to be faithful to each other when we got married. You've broken that vow probably more times than I can count. Any one of those guys could have gotten you pregnant. There are sperm cells present in the pre-ejaculate as well. So every time you got one of those bastards hard and let him "touch," the inside of your pussy you played Russian roulette. What about diseases Justine? I don't remember seeing you make them use condoms. This is just stupid. The atmosphere and the fire had me thinking about what you mean to me but I need to leave now." I got up from the couch with her grabbing me around the waist and trying to pull me back down.

"Please, don't divorce me. Give me just one more chance," she begged.

"Justine I'm not going to divorce you," I said. "The laws in this country are skewed when it comes to divorces. Men never get a fair shot no matter what. After seeing how badly you've hurt me, I'm never getting married again so I don't need a divorce. I'm just going to leave. See you around."