It's In The Wrong Catagory

This particular farmer specialized in heirloom and unusual produce, and was having trouble finding a market for some of the odder stuff until he met us. This particular day he was delivering African horned melons, also known as jelly melons, or less flattering as snot melons.

They were cylindrical little fruit, mottled orange and yellow with spikes covering them. Pretty sharp spikes. The flesh was light green and kind of slimy looking, hence the nickname.

I had tasted them and found them almost flavorless. They had just been named a new super food, and Aaron, our chef, had concocted a salad with them as the center piece. The ladies loved it.

I had walked outside to look at some bananas he had managed to grow, tiny pink little things with a lot of flavor. He'd raised a dozen trees, just for fun, and he was giving the harvest away to friends and customers. I was helping him carry in his delivery, mostly because I enjoyed talking to him and wanted to get out in the sun.

We were right beside the cart path. He was drunk, reaching for another beer, and ran all over me. I guess I should be glad it was a golf cart and not a car.

After a trip to the E.R., I had a brace on my knee, four stitches in my arm, and a killer headache. I was also out of work for two weeks, no negotiation.

I did hobble in the next day, working in the office for two hours, reaching into my book for temporary help, going over the schedule with the chef and assistant bar manager, getting ready for my 'vacation', when the club manager and the chairman walked into my office.

"Jerry, how do you feel?"

There seemed to be genuine concern in his voice. He was a good man, rising from nothing and building a successful business. He had been chairman for quite a while, and the club was his third passion, following his late wife, then his business. Despite his age, women young enough to be his daughter seemed attracted to him.

"It's the money, Jerry." he said late one afternoon when we were practically alone in the bar and he was in a mellow mood. "Put enough zeros behind a number and it makes you ridiculously handsome. I enjoy them, but it's never going anywhere. My late wife set the bar too high and I haven't found any one else who can come close."

"Sore," I said, coming back to the present, grinning. "The doctor says I can come back in two weeks, on a limited basis."

"We just want you to know, the club will take care of all your expenses, and your salary. Anything else you need, let us know."

He paused, hesitant.

"What do you want to do about Bob?"

Bob was the guy who ran over me. I knew they were worried about possible legal ramifications. I bore him no ill will, I know it was an accident, and he was a decent guy, when he was sober.

"One month suspension. What if it had been a guest, or some service guy, or even a member? The club would be in deep shit. And when he gets back, he doesn't drive a cart, for at least three months. That's my suggestion."

Both of them breathed a sigh of relief.

"Done. Thanks, Jerry. And Don wants to apologize to you. He really does feel bad about what happened."

"Tell him we'll talk when his suspension is over."

We talked a few more things over, I returned to my apartment, where a pain pill was waiting with my name on it. I was in a pleasant fuzzy fog almost instantly.

................................................

The pounding on the door was insistent. I listened to it for what seemed like forever before I finally dragged myself off the couch.

Marie almost knocked me down rushing in.

"How bad are you hurt? They should shoot that dumbass!"

I shook my head, trying to clear it. Tried to talk but it came out slurred.

"Poor baby. Let me help you to bed."

She led me into the bedroom and sat me on the bed. She took my shirt off, helped me down to my boxers, sliding the loose exercise pants off slowly to avoid hurting me. She tucked me in, ruffling my hair and giving me a quiet kiss.

I passed out. Later I half woke, feeling warm soft flesh pressed against me. It felt so good I just hugged harder and went back to sleep.

Later still I felt something warm and wet around my erection. It was such a pleasant experience I just lay there. I remember disappointment when the feeling stopped, then an even more pleasant feeling when something even warmer and wetter wrapped around me.

I opened my eyes to see Marie carefully riding me, her eyes closed in bliss. I was sure it was a dream, she was surrounded by a golden glow, smiling. It was probably the meds, but I felt tears trickle down my cheeks, I was so happy. I imagined her kissing my tear stained cheek when I faded out.

..................................................

My eyes flew open, trying to process why I felt so good. Looking over, I saw a pair of beautiful brown eyes. And an even more beautiful smile.

"Good morning, lover. Feeling better?"

Before I could answer she was out of bed. I heard the shower running, then she walked out wearing my robe.

"Do you need help? I'd be happy to assist you. I'll make sure EVERYTHING is squeaky clean."

She actually did help me into the shower, but there was no playing. Afterwards she helped me into a pair of running shorts and my brace.

She rattled around the kitchen, making coffee. She sat our cups down, and sat, grinning.

"How did you know I was hurt?"

"Evelyn told me. She called, inviting me to an impromptu lingerie party. I told her I'd love to. She seems really nice. I mentioned you, and she told me again how well she thought of you, and wasn't it a shame that you'd gotten hurt. I got off the phone as quickly as I could. I had to see you, make sure you were all right."

"How did you know where I lived?"

She blushed a bit.

"I had the private detective I hired for Winslow help me. It took him thirty minutes. I didn't know what else to do, I had no one to ask."

She looked around the kitchen nervously.

"Say it," I said, prompting her.

"I'm so sorry you got hurt. I knew you were alone, and I just had to come. I felt like you needed me. And yes, I used your weakened physical and mental state to take advantage of you. If you're waiting for an apology, don't waste your time, because it's not coming. I'd do it again. In fact, I want to do it again, often, and as long as you will let me. So there!"

I kept my eyes devoid of emotion until she looked miserable. Then I smiled, kissed her cheek, and told her maybe I'd take her up on that offer, AFTER she was legally free.

She practically danced around the kitchen, chattering a mile a minute. I just sipped my coffee, smiling.

She left late that afternoon. She wanted to play, but the pain was coming back, and I still didn't feel right about it, so nothing else happened.

She had packed an overnight bag[just in case, she said]and made a point of taking another shower, leaving the door open. She came out with a towel wrapped around her head and nothing else.

I admired her body, the high firm breasts, the surprisingly full bush. She saw me and laughed.

"I prefer being clean shaven, but when I found out he was cheating, I let it go, knowing he hates hair. Just another way to keep him away from me."

"Winnie the Pooh is an idiot. How in the world could any one cheat on you? Not just your body or mind, but the whole package? I'll never understand."

She sat down beside me, still nude, giggling over the nickname.

"I've thought about it, a lot. Even talked to a shrink. She said it was probably a power thing for him, having a beautiful and rich wife, while bedding practically anything that said yes. Said it had something to do with his beginnings, usually. I'll never know and frankly just don't care any longer. The fact that he never pressed me after I cut him off was an indication that he never considered sex vital to our relationship."

She looked at her watch.

"Gotta go. I have a meeting with the accountants and my lawyer, putting the finishing touches on the paperwork. I'll call you later. You better answer."

She gave me a tremendous kiss, and sailed out.

................................................

I sat and thought, consumed by doubts. I had to admit I had feelings for her. But, was I just a rebound, filling a need until she got her balance back? Could I take the chance? Plus, she had actively pursued me while she was still married. Could that be a pattern? Did I want to find out?

I passed out with a pain pill. Four hours later I woke. I had four missed calls from her. The last message said to call her whenever I got the message, he wasn't home.

I shouldn't have, but I called. She was bubbly, talking about how well the meetings went. We were on the phone an hour before I told her I had to go, the meds were kicking in again.

"Bye honey, I lo....er I'll talk to you tomorrow."

After ten days, I went back to work, mostly paperwork, staying off the knee as much as possible. I had been back two days when I got jumped. I hobbled back into the office, knowing my knee would give me hell tomorrow, wondering if I could get an appointment with my doctor.

I called Marie, gave her the whole story, telling her if she needed it, both the Chief and the ADA could testify.

"That tears it. In a way it's a good thing, giving me more to strengthen my position. I'll see if I can get a process server and an off duty cop to be here when he comes home. I'm not going to stay and fight with him, nothing he can say would matter in the least. I'll get an extended stay suite for a few weeks while they hash out the paperwork. Can I count on your support?"

"Always, but for now, just from afar. It will be better this way."

She didn't like that, not at all, but she had to respect it.

Three weeks later she walked into the bar. She had become fast friends with most of the ladies, and they would sing her praises to me.

Evelyn brought her up one day, after her tennis match.

"She seems to be such a sweet girl. You should take a look at her when this is all over. She's quite a looker, well off, and she seems to like you."

"Mrs. Everly! What an inappropriate thing to say. I don't know if you know this, but I'm going to college part time. I'll get my degree in three months. Miss Marie was in a couple of my classes, and we became friends. Of course, that was before I knew about her unhappy marriage, or that they were members here. She's all you say and more. Much more. But she's way out of my reach, and I would never embarrass her by trying to prove otherwise."

She eyed me for a few seconds before bursting into laughter.

"Jerry dear, I've always thought you were pretty sharp, for a man, but that statement just disproved that. If she likes you, and you're attracted to her, you need to do something about it. People fall in love all the time outside their social and economic levels. It's life. You love who you love. Think I was born to money? I was the fourth daughter of a Pennsylvania coal miner, we were dirt poor."

"I went to college on a scholarship, met Hal, and never looked back. Oh, I had misgivings, and my mother in law never really liked me, but we've been together thirty three years. The money is nice, but I would have married him if he were a coal miner like my father."

"I think I know you better than you think, Jerry. My father and husband are cut from the same cloth. Her marriage was over before you even met her, so there's no guilt in having feelings for her. I admire your sense of honor, but it's misplaced here. I have to go now, dear. Think about what I've said."

I did. It got worse. Mrs. Everly told her friends, and they waged a campaign, throwing us together constantly, timing it when I was available.

Marie thought it was funny.

"Come on, honey. Everybody in the universe thinks you and I together is a good idea but you. I know, I can see it in your eyes, deep down you do too. Ease off on your sense of propriety and let it happen. And don't fall back on my marriage being in the way."

"Not only have I filed for divorce, but I'm legally separated until it goes through. I didn't have to do that, I did it hoping to appease your pride."

.................................................

I thought about it, a lot. Maybe everyone was right, maybe I was a fool. Then something happened to make me think I was too late.

It was a dinner dance, a once a month affair at the club. Marie had asked me twice to accompany her, but I was concerned about the repercussions for me professionally. Even if I came as her guest, I was still an employee, and some would frown on it. I told her my reasons, but she was still upset.

I was at my usual station, observing, keeping the waitresses and staff on their toes, when she walked in.

With a date.

She came straight over to me.

"Good evening, Jerry. This is my date for the evening, Don Thompson. You might recognize the name, his family owns Thompson Manufacturing. I told him you were the best at what you do, and that you would take good care of us."

So, she had replaced me. With a more handsome man from money. Like seeking like, I suppose.

Her eyes were searching my face. Years of training paid off, because I didn't bat an eye, keeping my expression bland.

"Thank you for your confidence, MRS. Martin. The club will do everything possible to make sure you and your guest enjoy yourself. I fear I'm not physically up to speed just yet," I indicated the cane I still had to use when my knee started aching, "but I'll have Suzanne attend to you personally. Please excuse me."

I hobbled over to Suzanne, the new bar tender I had hired, to ask her to keep an eye on them. She looked at me funny, she had been here long enough to hear the rumors, but followed her orders.

I stayed for a few more minutes, watching them twirl slowly around in a waltz, before going into my office and shutting the door. I stayed in for forty five minutes, before circulating, making sure everything was flowing smoothly, before making an exit, pleading pain.

I was off the next day, but the next I was ambushed as soon as I walked in.

Mrs. Everly, Mrs. Jones, Mrs. Simpson, the Big Three in terms of member wives. Two husbands had seats on the board. The other headed our charities, doing fundraisers for sending disadvantaged youths to community college and beyond.

"Office, now!" snapped Mrs. Everly.

Wondering what was going on, I ushered them in, got them seated, and sat at my desk.

"How may I help you fine ladies this morning?" I said, pleasantly.

"You can stop being a dumbass!" snapped Mrs. Simpson.

"What?"

Mrs. Everly put a calming hand on her arm.

"What she means, dear, is that you've seriously upset a member. We're here to stop it from getting any worse."

She paused while I reflected.

"I can't recall ever offending a member in all the time I've been here, excepting the few times when I had to stop serving alcohol to someone. Who is he, and what did I do to offend him? I'll do everything in my power to make it right."

"That's the spirit, Jerry. I knew we could count on you. And the offended member is a woman. Marie Martin."

I suddenly got a really bad feeling about all of this.

"What is my offense against Mrs. Martin? Looking back, I can't recall one single instance of disrespect or slight to her."

Mrs Jones chimed in.

"Get off it, Jerry. Everyone with eyes and ears knows she's in love with you, and you feel the same way if you'll just admit it. She started crying halfway through the dance last weekend. Her date got fed up and left her. Her friends, including us, got her home. She just went out with him to make you jealous, move you along."

"Now, we expect you two to kiss and make up. Soon. If she continues to be unhappy, that would make us unhappy, and we would make our husbands unhappy. It's a trickle down effect with you standing at the bottom of the hill. Get my meaning?"

They all looked at me expectantly. I sat back, thinking for a moment, before I spoke.

"let me get this straight. Despite the job I've done or my years of service to this place, my future here come down to dating a member. The carrot or the stick, right? Marie is the carrot, my future is the stick. Have I assessed the situation correctly?"

They all had the decency to look uncomfortable and a little embarrassed.

"We're just trying to help two people we like get together, dear, please don't try to read anything else into it. You'd be really good for each other, we'd get a happy member and get to keep a person we hold in far more regard as just an employee."

I thanked the ladies gravely, promising to bring the problem to a quick resolution. They left, happily chattering.

Suzanne said it was like a bomb went off in the building when they realized I was gone and Chairman got my letter of resignation.

............................................

I disappeared for a week, using my contacts to stay off the grid, working my way through two resorts and an upscale bar three states away, while I calmed down.

The ladies should have talked to my parents.

"He's the least pushable person I've ever seen. Won't stand for it, even if it's for his own good." My mom was heard to say that often.

My dad just said I should get a job teaching mules to be stubborn, I'd make a very good living.

I stopped by on the way back. It was Sunday, and my extended family, at least the ones who could make it, often ate with my parents, bringing dishes and putting finishing touches on at the house.

Everything went quiet when I walked in the door.

"What?" I said, before everyone began chattering again.

"We're just surprised to see you, that's all. I'm surprised you still remember where we live."

I hugged her, spinning her around before setting her down.

"Way to shame me, Mom, but you know my schedule, it's hard to get home, especially on the weekend. Good news, maybe, I may have something a little more steady in the future."

We ate, I entertained them with tales from the bar and the foolish things rich people do until midafternoon.

Mom caught me out on the porch, sitting down beside me on the swing.

"What's going on, son?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about, Mom."

She reached over, gripping my hand.

"You're girlfriend came by two days ago, looking for you. Marie seems like a really nice person. She was tore up bad, what did you two fight about?"

She knew me well. If she hadn't been holding my hand I would have been up and pacing.

"She's not my girlfriend, Mom. And we haven't had a fight, even if she was."

She smoother her dress, letting me calm down.

"Well, something sure set her off. She's looked all over for you, said she needed to apologize to you. Not my business of course, but I think she loves you. And, I still need one more to make my dozen."

She knew that would make me laugh. She always said she wanted a dozen grandchildren, and the last one had appeared two years ago, number eleven.

"I'll call her when I get home. I promise."

"See you do. I'm getting on up there, I'd like to see you settled with a good woman before I go."

I kissed her cheek.

"You're sixty one Mom, and healthier than I am. You'll outlive us all."

I said my goodbyes, and was home by midnight.

...............................................

I was home for an hour, had just gotten in bed, when someone began pounding on my door. Marie.

When I opened it she jumped into my arms, nearly knocking me down. Crying and talking, I just let her go until she calmed down.

"Where have you been?! You have any idea how many people have been looking for you? Never mind, I need to tell you something before you throw me out."

I waited.

"I only went out with that guy to make you jealous. He's nothing to me. I cried when you put on your act and then left. He got so disgusted with me he left me at the dance, alone. Apparently money doesn't teach you manners."