Lost & Found Ch. 02

"Son, what are you not telling me, about Casey and you, I mean? He asked, softly. "I get the feeling I'm missing out on something here, something important, and it's about you and your sister..."

"Mr. Novak, may I say something please?" interjected Casey, Frank replying "Please do, Casey, and it's Frank, OK?"

Casey smiled gratefully at him. "Thank you...Frank. You probably know what I did, Sarah must have given you all the nasty details. I was such a poor excuse for a sister I made my big brother leave, I drove him away, and I lost the most precious thing I had. I only realised what a gift I'd been given after I'd thrown it away. I tried and tried to find him, and all the time I was trying to find him I was terrified that he was alone, and frightened and someone so much worse than me was hurting him more, that all the evil that people can do was being done to him. I was so frightened for him, the way I should always have been, the way he deserved."

"I searched for him because I needed to say I was sorry for all the terrible, hurtful, spiteful things we'd done to him. I know that I'll pay for what I did, I should; some sins can't be wiped away with words or tears, but I found him, and I found I loved him more than anything in this world. All I want is for Robbie to be safe, and protected, and I swear to God I will be the one to do that for him -- I'll never let him go again, for as long as I live!"

Frank looked long and searchingly at her, at the tears standing in her eyes, at her hand holding Robbie's and his arm around her, gentle and protective, and suddenly he knew what had happened between them. He looked at them in wonder, moved by the sincerity in her voice, but also understanding what kind of obstacles they were going to face, and feeling a sudden rush of deep sympathy for what was heading their way.

"Casey, I believe you, and I'm glad that you and Robbie found each other at last, and I can only wish you luck, you're going to need it. However, Robbie has three very vocal champions in my home, my wife Caitlin, and Moira and Morag, good luck convincing them, really! You're going to have to be as honest and sincere with them as you just were with me, because they're going to take a great deal of convincing. I love Robbie like a son, I'd be proud to call him son, but the girls all adore him in a very special way, and they're not going to let you off easy. The twins aren't going to be particularly happy with anyone taking Robbie away from them, and when they find out who you really are, well, just be prepared for fireworks when you tell them. For what it's worth, I'm on your side; Robbie's happy so I'm happy, and I'm pleased he's finally found a girl who'll care for him as much as you obviously do."

"Caitlin, however, is going to be something else. Robbie lived with us for a couple of years, and Caitlin took him in and made him hers, just like the twins. When she thinks of her kids, Robbie sits in there as naturally as Moira and Morag; he's one of hers, and she's going to do or say anything she thinks fit to protect her boy; if she thinks she needs to, she'll stand over him and maul anyone who gets too near, make no mistake. Think of getting between momma bear and her cubs, and you'll have an idea of what she can be like when it comes to Robbie and the girls! Convince her, and you're home free, so make sure you're completely honest with her."

Frank stood up, smiled, and gently patted her shoulder. "It's nearly time for lunch, kids, so we'll leave this alone until Caitlin gets back; as far as the girls are concerned, for now you're just Robbie's girlfriend, OK?"

Casey and Robbie nodded, and Frank left to go and order pizza.

Lunch was noisy fun, the twins Moira and Morag, loud, brash, leggy 14 year old identical green-eyed red-heads, arguing with everyone and each other, disagreeing with the pizza choices, generally causing trouble, by turns fractious, adorable and just plain annoying; in every respect, a typical boisterous Sunday afternoon in the Novak household. The girls were ecstatic Joey had brought Robbie, they loved to pester him to take them cruising in the Bentley so the neighbourhood kids could see them being driven around in such a hot car, tugging and pulling him every which way, giving him no peace, trying to hit him up for new games and game handsets, and coercing him into digging into his wallet and passing them a few bucks that Mom didn't need to know about. And he loved it, this was his family, this was how it should be. The girls were curious about Casey, and Robbie introduced her as "my new girlfriend, Case", waiting on tenterhooks to see if they'd make the connection; they didn't; as usual, they weren't really paying attention to what was going on around them, deeply involved as they were in one of their own interminable cryptic squabbles.

At last, Caitlin arrived home, seeing Robbie's car in the drive and calling out for him as she came in, hugging him tightly, then Joey and Karen, and looking curiously at Casey, huddled in Robbie's arm. She was an older, taller version of the twins, slender and motherly, Casey noting how she linked arms with Robbie and held him close, protectively, obviously unaware she was doing so.

"Aunt Kat, we need to talk, all of us," said Robbie, his face sombre and serious. Caitlin pricked up her ears; she'd never seen Robbie like this before; something was up.

"OK, in the den. Girls, we need to talk for a while, grown-up stuff, we'll tell you about it later," shooing the two teens outside, ignoring their protests that they were grown-up's too.

Once they'd all filed in and sat down, Caitlin looked at Robbie and Casey.

"OK, baby, what's this about, and who's this young lady?"

Robbie braced himself, began speaking.

"Aunt Kat, you know all about what went on before, my...family. This is Casey, my sister, she came looking for me, she's been looking for me since I left, and we found each other by chance a couple of days ago in Sacramento." He waited apprehensively for the explosion, but, apart from a slight hardening of her eyes and a faint line appearing between her eyebrows, she just nodded, saying "Go on."

Robbie continued. "We spent a long time talking about what happened, and she told me about how she felt about me, about what she'd done, and how she was trying to make it right; I don't blame her, she was only a kid and did what she saw everyone else around her doing. She apologised to me, and to Joey and Karen, she's made it right with me, and now we want to make it right with the rest of my family, finally put this whole thing away forever. Aunt Kat, I finally found my little sister, and she found me, and we discovered something about us both. I love Casey, and she loves me, like brother and sister, but also the...other way. For me, that wipes out the past. Can you understand that?"

Caitlin was thunderstruck. Here was Robbie telling her that his sister, the girl who'd cost him so much, had come looking for him, had found him, and now he was in love with her!

She looked searchingly at Casey, noting the way she sat as he spoke, not defensively, leaning into him, passively accepting him as her protector, her eyes on his face as he spoke, her hands showing no flinching or drawing away when he took one of them, all her body language confirming what he was saying.

Caitlin finally spoke. "And you....Casey, just what have you got to say for yourself?" Her tone took away any sting her words might have had, and Casey lifted her eyes to look at her.

"Mrs. Novak, everything Robbie, Joey and Sarah have told you was true. I made poor Robbie's whole life unbearable, I cost him his big chance and took away the future he should have had. I have no excuses, I was old enough to say 'no, no more' and I didn't, it was just easier to keep on hurting him. We ground him into nothing, and threw him away. When he left, that was when I realised what I'd really lost, what I should have held onto. Robbie is my big brother, and I should have looked up to him, let him be my hero; instead, I drove him away, and that will always weigh on my heart; that I made him leave, alone and with no-one to care for him; it took strangers to be the family he needed, his own family weren't worthy of him. Now that we've found each other, I won't let him go again; I found him, and he let me back in, and I found a part of him that I need more than I can ever say. I love Robbie, in a way that you probably won't approve of, nor understand, but seems so simple to me. I couldn't be his sister when he needed me, but now I can be more than that for him, and he feels the same way, and wants that same thing from me."

Caitlin watched the tears roll down Casey's cheeks, saw Karen hold and squeeze her hand, and watched Robbie brush her hair with his lips as he smoothed it back from her forehead, noting the tears glimmering in Joey's eyes, and sighed.

"Casey, for years now I've wanted to give you a piece of my mind, and then the flat of my hand, and now I've got you here, I find I can't! Are you sure this is what you want, both of you? Because Robbie is an important part of this family, I love him like he was my own son, as does Sarah, and we look after our own, always. Will you promise me, with all of your heart, never to hurt him, to never do anything to make the hurt come back? Because if you can't swear that absolutely, you should leave, now!"

Casey looked directly at Caitlin, noted her pale, fixed features, her flared nostrils as her emotions got the better of her for a moment, all her protective instincts crowding together to defend one of her own, and said "Mrs. Novak, Robbie means the world to me; I will never hurt him again, ever. I've done enough of that, and I would die before I ever hurt him again. Now I just want to keep him close to me!"

Caitlin nodded, satisfied.

"And Joey, what's your part in all this?"

Joey looked nonplussed. "Aunt Kat, until last night I knew nothing of this; when we walked into Robbie's place last night and saw Casey, you could have knocked me down with a feather! But I believed her then, and I believe her now, and Robbie's happy, so we worked it out. Yeah, I welcomed her in, so did Karen, and you know what happened last time they met in a confined space!"

Caitlin grinned, knowing what Joey meant, and smiled at Casey. "Casey, Robbie obviously loves you, and you love him. I take it you've already talked to Frank?" They nodded, so she continued. "So I guess he's pointed out how hard this is going to be for you, the problems that you're both going to face? Robbie is special, and he's one of us, which I suppose makes you one of us now, and families hang together; otherwise, they'll hang us separately, so welcome to the family! We won't tell the girls exactly who you are; they can find that out when they're a little older. And by the way, I'm Aunt Kat or Caitlin; Mrs. Novak's what the paperboy calls me!"

As Joey and Karen left, Caitlin closed the door, obviously wanting a private word with the two of them.

"Robbie, Casey, you do know what you're doing here, don't you? This is a one-way street, there's no turning back, no do-over, no running for the border. Am I making myself clear?" They both nodded silently.

"Good, because you've chosen a hard row to hoe. People have a way of labelling, and they'll have some nasty names for what you're doing, and even worse names for the two of you. Are you going to be strong enough together to get past all that? Get through without giving-up on each other because of outside pressure? I sincerely hope so. We can help you some of the way, but you're going to have to do the lion's share by yourselves, with no magic solutions, no god-in-a-box from on-high to come down and make it right. My best advice to you is: keep your secrets, and keep them well guarded, it's the only way you'll survive!"

Her eyes were brimming, and Casey had a sudden flash of insight into why, but Caitlin said nothing further.

"And Robbie, don't ever tell the girls, they get an unhallowed thrill from spilling secrets, and this is too important to trust to them. They love you fiercely, but they've got mouths like jackrabbits, always running off at full speed, and they'll spill it eventually, by accident if nothing else."

They filed out of the den, the twins suddenly looking innocent, trying to look like they hadn't been eavesdropping, trying to pump any and everyone for information, agog to know what the adults had been discussing. Eventually Caitlin gave in, and told the girls that Robbie was getting engaged, Casey and Robbie grinning at her over their heads, immediately setting-off a barrage of questions about when, was there going to be a party, when were they getting married, could they be bridesmaids, squabbling about the bridesmaids' dresses and so on, eventually lapsing into 'twin-speak', gibberish comprehensible only to them.

Robbie and Joey left them to it, wandering off to find Frank in the garden, lying in a lounger under a spreading olive tree, drinking a beer and idly flicking through 'Sports Illustrated'. He looked at them closely. "No marks, still got all your teeth, either she's slowing down or she took it well!"

Robbie and Joey sat on the adjacent lounger and smiled. "She was OK, Uncle Frank, she accepted Casey. I'm worried about Casey, though; she's been through a lot these last few years, but these last few days have been really rough on her, and now this endless round of apologizing, dragging up the past. I'm worried about her; she can't keep beating herself up like this without paying for it. I was going to take her back home tomorrow, she wants Mom to know, make her peace there as well, but I've changed my mind, I think she needs to stay with me, just the two of us, get some stability back, before she turns into a basket-case. What do you think?"

Frank paused, took a slow, thoughtful swallow, and looked up at the sky for a moment. "There's a lot to what you say, and ordinarily I'd agree with you, but I think Casey needs to face this one last hurdle and get this off her chest once and for all; the longer she delays, the harder it's gonna get; Sarah needs to know, so they can both be at peace with this. I hear what you're saying, and I feel for her; she's a lovely girl, and she seems genuinely sorry for what happened, but I really think she needs to be square with your Mom right now; if you delay, it'll look like you're trying to hide something, and the longer you delay, the worse it will get. I really think you should take her home now, see Sarah, and close this all down for good. Trust your Mom, she may surprise you; you know she only ever wants what's best for you. Plus, if you drag this out and she finds out I knew long before she did, my life will suddenly become very complicated!" Frank gave a wry grin, and Robbie smiled in quick sympathy.

Joey stood up and stretched.

"So, are we all heading home tomorrow or not? Robbie?"

"I guess so bro."

Robbie and Casey quietly told Caitlin what they were planning, and she broadly agreed with Frank, so they made their farewells. Before they left, however, Robbie had a quick whispered conversation with Caitlin, earning him a raised eyebrow and a reluctant nod, and went out to the car. He came back in with the two packages from the trunk.

"Moira, Morag, come here, babies, I've got something for you!" he called, and waited until they came clattering in. "Girls, these are from Case and me, early birthday presents, OK?" the twins opened their packages and squealed; inside were the latest IPad's.

"Remember, these are for your birthday, so no begging phone calls on the day, OK?" he grinned. "Happy early-Birthday from Case and me!" The twins danced around hugging Robbie and Casey, swearing undying love for both of them, then hustled off to their room to get acquainted with their new toys and boast to their friends.

Once they'd all left, and the girls were locked way in their own world with their new toys, Caitlin went looking for Frank, finding him still lounging in the shade. She sat on his lap, locking her arms around his neck, burying her head in his shoulder. Frank slipped his arm around her waist, pulling her closer to him.

"You're thinking about what happened before, aren't you?" he asked, making it more of a statement than a question.

Caitlin murmured into his neck. "I'm scared, honey. I'm scared for those poor kids. It's happening again; dear God, I thought it was over, instead it's all happening again; how is Sarah going do it this time, really? After the last time, can she go through this again, even for Robbie? I know he's not her biological son, but he may as well be, he's family, and this is a family can of worms everyone thought was safely buried and forgotten. Robbie and Casey have got some big problems coming their way, is Sarah going to be able help them deal with all of it this time round? And there's Joey to consider as well. Whether he knows it or not, he's a part of this, a big part, supposing it all comes out while she's trying to get Robbie through this? It could tear his world apart, how can anything justify doing that to that poor kid? He doesn't deserve that!"

Frank stared thoughtfully into the canopy of the olive tree, gathering his thoughts.

"Sarah believes in Robbie, and the one person that Joey cares for more in the whole world than Sarah, or Karen, I suppose, is Robbie. If Joey finds out, I doubt he'll care one way or the other; I think you give him too little credit for being the kid that he is; there's more of Sarah in him than anyone else, so I don't think we should concern ourselves too much on that front. And Sarah, before, she was alone, flying blind, and yet she got it right; now, for Robbie, there's all of us there to help carry the load and make a difference. Sarah will get them both through this, with our help. Don't worry, baby, it'll work out fine, it'll be OK; Robbie's lucky, he's got two mom's to fight his corner, can you really see anyone getting past you and Sarah? Relax, they'll be fine, it will all work itself out!"

On the drive back, Joey noted the gifts. "Smart move bro, now, when they find out who Casey is, all they'll focus on is the fact she gave them IPad's!"

Robbie grinned. "That was kind of the plan; I told you I know what makes those two little mercenaries tick!" He didn't mention the conversation he'd had with Caitlin, but privately he knew, someday the girls would have to find out; they were family too, and Robbie loved them equally; they deserved to know, so he and Casey would have to work on that.

They arrived back in Daly City just about an hour after leaving Morgan Hill, and dropped Joey and Karen off to do some browsing in Westlake Shopping Center, the two of them asserting they 'knew how to find a taxi, it's OK, go home, see you later'. As Joey had pointed out, Robbie needed to call Sarah, and they wanted to shop.

Robbie called Sarah as soon as they got in; it was almost an hour later there, and she was enjoying a post lunch nap when he called.

"Hi, Mom? It's me. I was just calling to say I'm coming home to see you, coming back with Joey and Karen, and I've got a surprise for you. What? No, you'll find out tomorrow. I told, you it's a surprise! Yeah, I know, see you tomorrow lunchtime, I love you too, Mom!"

Robbie grimaced. "OK Casey, now comes the hard part; are you sure you're up to this?"

Casey smiled gently at him.

"Baby, I've made my peace with everyone in your family except the most important one, so yes, I think I'm ready for one last showdown! If I'm to have any chance of succeeding with your family and become a part of it, I have to do this, I have to clear this all out of the way now. I told you, I'll be fine, Sarah's not like my mom & dad, she's only looking out for you, like we should have, so if she wants to unload on me, well, she's earned the right, I guess. As long as you're there I'll be fine."