Miracle Man

The three sat down at the food court outside of the theater and Josh wanted a hamburger.

"Where do you put it, buddy?" asked the man. "You already had popcorn and soda in the theater."

Rhonda handed the man an envelope. "What's this," he asked. "I already got what I wanted."

"It's the information on your new bank account. It's a bank in the Caymans. The US government can't look into their banking records, so they can't find out how much you have or where it came from. But you can transfer money into any US bank from there. If it was me, I'd transfer the money into one bank and then write a check and deposit that money into another US bank before spending it. You have a little over two million dollars. I promised you half but I kept more because I'm going to need another house after I announce my divorce and you said you didn't want it anyway," she said smiling.

"Rhonda, when that fat lump of crap told the world how he'd destroyed my marriage and screwed my soon to be ex-wife, that was all the redemption I needed." said Robbie.

"So you can take her back then, I hope" said Rhonda. "You know this really wasn't her fault. Jimmy can talk the panties off of a mother superior."

"Maybe not," said Robbie. "I can see your point after seeing him at work, but there are still too many things I can't get past. The first is that if she loved me as much I love her there's no way she'd have slept with anyone else. And even if she had been conned into it once, why not tell me about it so we could move on. And then there's the fact that when I did walk in and catch her, not only did she try to justify what she'd done, she wanted to keep doing it. I'm better off without her in my life."

"Robbie, you make an excellent father," began Rhonda, as she watched Josh go play on the play-scape near the food court.

"Is that a proposal?" asked Robbie.

"Oh Robbie I'm close to twice your age," said Rhonda.

"And you're close to twice as pretty as any woman I've ever seen," said Robbie. "So what does that matter?"

"You know Robbie, maybe you've been paying a little bit too much attention to Jimmy. You're as smooth as a baby's behind," said Rhonda. "Anyway you're going to be a daddy on your own soon."

"What do you mean?" asked Robbie.

"Heather is pregnant," said Rhonda.

"Oh shit, he got her pregnant," said Robbie.

"No dummy, she was already pregnant before they started, according to what the doctor says. She just didn't find out until after you left. I know this is going to be hard for you to hear but the day you caught them they already been at it for three weeks to a month. She was six weeks pregnant when you left."

"I can't believe anything out of her mouth," said Robbie. "I'll wait for the DNA tests. If it does turn out to be mine I'll do whatever I need to do for the child."

"What about Heather?" asked Rhonda. "Robbie, people really do occasionally do the dumbest things for reasons that seem like they make sense. She really does love you."

"I'll think about it," said Robbie. "But for now it still just hurts too much. Anyway I have a long drive ahead of me. We're friends now so keep in touch. And I'd really like to show Josh the farm someday. You can call me whenever you want, even if you just need someone to talk when the divorce starts."

"I will be taking you up on that," smiled Rhonda.

* * * * * *

Robbie

My timing was impeccable. Just as I got into the Mustang and turned on the radio a song that I'd forgotten came on. The guitar's tone was so syrupy and thick that it easily recognizable. It was Zakk Wylde playing with Ozzy Osborne. I came into the song during the second verse and turned it up as loud as I could laughing as hard as I could to what Ozzy sang. Maybe it was a sign. Somehow it just felt right.

"Today I saw a Miracle Man on TV crying," sang Ozzy.

"Such a hypocritical man, born again and dying." I had to really concentrate to drive at that point.

"He don't know where he's going," sang Ozzy. To jail I hope, I thought.

"But we know just where he's been," I knew where he'd been. He'd been in my wife and he was going to pay for it. It was going to cost him everything.

"It was our little Jimmy sinner. That I saw on the screen." I was singing along with Ozzy by then but I was singing, "That asshole on the screen."

"Miracle Man, Got Busted," Ozzy sang and repeated it over and over while Zakk's fiendish guitar filled in every available space in the background. I reached over and grabbed my shades as Ozzy continued to berate Jimmy sinner. I didn't need to anymore, I'd gotten my revenge, my pound of flesh or whatever it was called. I felt good for the first time in days. I might not know what lay ahead of me but it was better than what I'd left behind.

I drove the rest of that day and by sundown I was pulling in the gates of the farm. I parked the Mustang in its usual spot in the barn and started playing with the idea of improving it. There were also a few things I wanted to buy for the barn to give me the ability to really work on things here. An engine hoist and a Hydraulic lift would be great. Even as I pictured them, Dan came up behind me.

"What are you thinking about?" he asked me.

"I'm trying to picture what the barn would look like with a hydraulic lift," I said.

"I'm trying to picture you on a tractor," he laughed. "Starting tomorrow I have to teach you about farming. We have to get you ready for harvest time. The boys will be gone by then and you and I will have to watch over all of the workers we hire to help us bring in the crops." I just smiled and nodded.

"So you got him, huh?" he asked. I just nodded again

"I didn't tell anyone and I'd advise you not to either. Grandma is upset as hell about someone taking her hero down. If she finds out you had anything to do with it she'll get in your ass," he said.

"So anything else happen around here?" I asked. "I was gone for a week."

"Hm let's see," he said. "My truck is making a funny noise when I start it. Oh and Katie moved out of the house, but that's about it."

"Wow, I thought it was stressful on a parent when a child especially an only child moves out," I said. Dan just smiled.

"After you put your stuff away come on up to the house. I think there's some of that McDonald's food left," he said.

I put my gear away and headed up to the house. As soon as I walked in the door Betty was on me. "Robbie," she screamed. "I missed you. Are you hungry? I'll cook something for you."

"Uhm Dan said something about McDonald's," I said.

"You don't need any of that artificial crap," she snapped. "I'll make you something fresh. Don't worry it'll be something quick and light." She was smiling when she said it. I turned to look for Dan, hoping he'd come to my rescue but all I heard was the front door slamming in his wake.

An hour later, with my stomach feeling like I'd swallowed a box of gravy covered rocks and my bowels threatening to erupt at any second, I headed for the bunkhouse.

I tried to crawl into my bed and noticed that someone was already in it. It actually made sense. Joe and Greg were probably the biggest pigs on earth. But even they, when faced with the choice of a clean room or a filthy one would rather sleep in the clean one. I figured I'd now cleaned up two rooms, with my luck each of them had picked one.

The light came on and a very naked, very surprised Katie sat up. she didn't even bother covering up what was probably the nicest set of breasts I'd ever seen.

"Sorry Katie," I mumbled. "Your dad said you'd moved out of the house. Are you visiting one of the guys? Let me get out of here?"

"Robbie, I moved out of the house and into your room," she said. "I knew you'd be back when you took care of your problem. And I started sleeping in here because I missed you and your bed smells like you. This is our bed now." She held up the covers and I was just too tired to argue. I crawled in with her.

"Robbie you still have your clothes on," she said frowning. I pulled off my shirt and my pants but left my boxers on. "I guess that'll do for a start," she smirked.

Sometime during the night, Katie's and my body parts got all tangled up together. I wish I could say that I resisted the temptation and just moved the hell away from her. But I can't. I awoke sometime during the night with Katie's hand inside my boxers and her lips sucking one of my nipples.

"So you're finally awake," she said and went right back to what she was doing. Without even thinking about it I skinned off my boxers and rolled her over onto her back. I reached down and felt her slit and she was already warm and wet so I just slipped it inside her.

I don't think that Katie was really ready for what happened. I think she was expecting it to be like what she'd gotten used to with the younger guys. She was expecting a very tentative and probing coupling with a guy taking it easy because he still wasn't very sure of what he was doing. Some of those guys also aren't sure of the boundaries between what they can and can't do, especially with a girl as pretty as Katie. And as bad as it seems, guys, think about it, we do fuck ugly girls differently than pretty ones, we all know it.

With the more attractive women we tend to be more romantic because we're hoping for a relationship or at least a return visit. But girls we aren't really attracted to get the worst treatment because it's all about us. We just want to get in, get off, get out and get home.

It had been months since I'd had sex. And I guess I took some of my anger over the situation with Heather out on Katie. I rolled her over and just fucked her as hard as I could. There was no kissing, no foreplay, just two bodies slamming together violently towards a conclusion. She was moaning and jerking her pussy up to meet me the whole time. When she came, even though the room was dark I could see nothing in her eyes but love. I guess I should have been shocked, but all it did was remind me that I'd seen that same fucking look so many times in Heather's eyes and look how that turned out.

I think that Katie was expecting me to just slow down or stop after her orgasm but I just kept slamming her until I was ready to cum myself. When I felt that first spurt about to happen, I pulled out and let it fly on her tummy. Katie was cumming again herself but she still looked up at me in shock. I just lay down next to her and fell asleep.

A short time later a small sound beside me in the bed woke me again. I opened my eyes and realized that Katie was crying.

"What's wrong with you?" I asked her.

"Nothing," she sniffled. With the moonlight shining through the window I could see that she was very hurt by something.

"Katie, we may as well talk about it," I said.

"It's not you," she said. "It's me. I guess I expected something different. It was good. I came twice. That hasn't ever happened to me before, but I guess I was expecting something different from you. It was like I wasn't even there. It felt like you just used me to get yourself off. You just used me like I was a whore or something. You know how girls try to act all sexy and say things like, "I like it rough."

"Well when you meet the guy who's supposed to be the one, you kind of want there to be more to it. You want it to mean something. And nobody really wants it THAT rough unless they're some kind of masochist. And it just felt like it would have been the same for you with anyone else. For all I know you could have been imagining that you were fucking Fanny or even your ex-wife."

"Katie, I've been trying to stay the hell away from you since this all started," I said. "I don't know when you suddenly decided that I was the chosen one, but there are a few problems with your thinking. Number one, I'm still married. That won't last very long now that I have the money to get out of it. But I still am. Number two, you treated me like shit for the longest time. And number three, I'm not even sure I like you, let alone anything else. But above and beyond all of those things Katie, I am BROKEN. You remember when you eavesdropped on the conversation I had with your dad? I lost the only woman I ever loved to a lying, cheating, dirt bag preacher and I may never recover from that emotionally."

"I may never be fit to be in any kind of relationship with any woman ever again, don't you understand that?" She sat up and faced me.

"But all of the things you did for me..." she began. "And you said I was pretty..."

"Katie, Eva Mendes is pretty. Rita Hayworth was a goddess. Shit, Rhonda Hubbard is beautiful, but that doesn't mean that I want any kind of relationship with any of them..."

I thought I was getting my point across but from the way her eyes narrowed I could see that I'd made a mistake.

"So when did you fuck her?" she snapped.

"Who?" I asked. "Eva Mendes?"

"No that preacher's slutty wife," she spat. "That's how you got to him isn't it. You fucked his wife and got her to make him admit to his affair with your wife. And that's why you don't want me isn't it? You want her, even though she's at least a hundred years old."

"Katie, I don't want Rhonda that way. We haven't slept together, we're just friends."

"But I don't even get the chance to be your friend," she sniffled. "And I can tell what you think of me every time you look at me. You think I'm just some kind of skank. Didn't you understand anything about the story my mom told you or were you just too busy fixing things to listen?"

"Katie, what are you talking about now?" I asked.

"Robbie, for most of my life, what I've done hasn't really been what I wanted to do. It was just a reaction to what was going on around me. I've heard the story about my mom and dad getting together four thousand God damned times. And it was just that. It was a story about something that happened a long time ago in a kingdom far away. It had nothing to do with me. But I did use it to my advantage."

"I used the story of how my mom was when she was younger, the whole fucking a lot of frogs before she found the prince thing, to get freedom to do what I wanted too. But I never really believed it. But Robbie, from the first second that I sat there beside you on that fucking couch, I knew that you were my prince. I tried so hard to pretend that I hated you and it just all went wrong. I even stole my mom's money so I could buy a fancy outfit to impress YOU."

She looked at me then and smiled. "Ya didn't know that did you?"

"If I wanted to impress any of the guys around here, I'd have waited to wear it when I went out. Why would I wear new clothes to have dinner with my family Robbie? I wanted you to see me in them. And then when you told Fanny how pretty you thought I was, it just made me light up like fireworks inside. I guess you haven't noticed this but for a girl you think is a slut, I haven't gone on one God damned date since you got here. I did make that mistake with Joe and Greg, but if you really heard us, you'd know who I wanted all the time. Even when you gave me my car, Fanny is still pissed about that, I knew you felt something for me. When you gave me that car and I drove up to the lake with all of those boys and it turned into the wildest party we've had around here in a long ass time, I didn't do anything. You can ask anybody you want. I had a couple of beers and that was it."

"I already know that Katie," I said.

"But do you really know why?" she asked. I shook my head. "Because dammit, I'm done fucking frogs. I know I'm not as pure as the driven snow or an untouched virgin like your wife was, but I'll never hurt you the way she did. I will stand beside you for the rest of our lives no matter what and I swear to you that no other man will ever touch me without killing me."

"Katie, I'm just messed up in the head," I said. "Can't we just be friends?"

"I guess that's a start," she said.

We went back to sleep then and to be truthful, it was the best night of sleep I'd had in a long time. The next day, Katie actually went out into the fields with Dan and me while he showed me around. He was puzzled. "Why's she here?" he asked. "She's never had anything to do with the farm work."

I just shrugged my shoulders. "Maybe she wants to learn about farming too."

I called Rhonda and she recommended a lawyer who could help me with my divorce. Of course she spent nearly the entire conversation trying to talk me out of it. "Robbie you don't understand how far she's fallen," said Rhonda. "She's just not the same person anymore."

Rhonda also had news of her own. Jimmy had been indicted on several counts of embezzling. The church had agreed to let him plea bargain down to a shorter sentence just to make things go away and get rid of the stain on its reputation. They'd already lined up another preacher to take over from Jimmy and was calling the TV show something entirely different. The whole Miracle Man thing was over. The new preacher, another charismatic southern boy favored a more folksy down home persona.

Rhonda said that she'd met him and he was at least as phony as Jim. He'd actually tried to hit on her while his wife was less than ten feet away.

The church was going to give Rhonda a small settlement to make sure that she didn't sue them or write anything about what happened. She was, of course, being evicted from the home that she and Jimmy had lived in for the past ten years because, it, along with most of their other possessions, technically belonged to the church. They were allowing her to keep a lot of her personal things.

She invited me to come back to town in a few weeks for Jimmy's sentencing. Her divorce was already underway and since Jimmy was now penniless and bound for prison, she was sure that it would be remarkably quick.

We agreed again to stay in touch and she promised that she'd bring Josh out to the farm when this was all over. I felt good as I hung up the phone until I saw the look in Katie's eyes.

"Forget it," she said. "You're not bringing that home wrecking whore anywhere near my farm and you're not going either."

"Uhm Katie," I said. "I've already told you that Rhonda and I are only friends and..."

"You and I are ONLY FRIENDS too," she snapped. "And look at what you did to me last night"

"But Rhonda is helping me to get a lawyer so I can get my divorce started," I said.

"Okay, she can do that," said Katie.

Later, after dinner, Katie went and hung out for a little while with Fanny, whom we hadn't seen at the farm since the car incident. She was only gone for about an hour and came, flying up the road to find me as soon as she got back.

I was sitting on the porch with Dan, Betty and Grandma. Grandma was telling us again about how she was sure that Jimmy Hubbard had been framed.

"They always take the great ones away from us," she said. "I already miss him."

"You already miss who, grandma?" asked Katie.

"The Reverend Jimmy Hubbard," said Grandma smiling.

Katie rolled her eyes and smiled at me. She looked around the porch and saw that there were no more chairs. "Katie, if you want to sit down, I could sit on the banister and be just as comfortable," I said. "Or I could get you a chair from the house?"

"Katie, doesn't want to sit with the old folks," said Betty. "She probably just came to ask about something, right?"

"No Mom, I had intended to sit out here and enjoy the evening breeze with my family," said Katie. "It's no problem, I'll just sit here." She plopped her ass down in my lap and leaned back.

Dan went back to explaining the irrigation system to me, while Grandma spun theory after theory about the downfall of the great Jimmy Hubbard. She even called him the Miracle Man a couple of times and every time she said it I could hear Ozzy in the background singing, "Got busted."

"It's all about water pressure and positioning of the nozzles," said Dan.