Sleepwalking

"Hey, Mom. What's going on?"

"I...I just wanted to make sure you got home safely."

"We did," her daughter replied. "But I know you too well. What's really going on?"

"Oh. I was hoping you had a wonderful time on your honeymoon."

"We did, Mom. But it was our honeymoon, so..."

"Oh, right. Of course you had a wonderful time."

"Mom?" Mackenzie said in that, "Tell me what's wrong," tone of voice.

"Well. I uh...I kind of...met someone."

Her daughter's voice changed immediately to excitement and happiness.

"Seriously? Mom, that's great! Who is he? Where did you meet him? Do you really like him? Is she from the firm?"

Connie took a deep breath then said, "His name is Matt. And we met at the reception."

"That's so awesome! I'm really happy for you!"

"Thank you, honey."

"So...is he a lawyer?"

"No. He uh, he owns a catering business."

"Nice. That's good, right?"

"Um. Yes. And he's very busy."

"And?" Mackenzie asked.

"And what?"

"And...is he...handsome?"

"Oh, he's very handsome," her mother replied with that 'I'm not telling you everything' sound.

"Uh-huh."

"He is. He's very attractive."

"Mom? You're doing it again."

"I am?"

"Uh-huh. You're not telling me something."

Not ready to mention his age, Connie tried stalling by telling her daughter something else.

"He's a widower, so he understands about Dad."

"Oh, Mom. That's so sad. I mean, not that he understands, but that he lost his wife."

"It is sad. And the way it happened was just terrible."

Mackenzie was assuming a car accident of maybe even a plane crash but never even considered the war.

"I'm sure. Then again there's no good way to lose someone you love."

"No. No there's not."

"So is that it?" Mackenzie asked.

"Well, there is one thing that kind of concerns me. A little."

"Okay. And what might that be?"

"Well, as it turns out, Matt's...he's a bit...younger than me."

Her daughter laughed, mostly out of a sense of relief, then replied.

"Whew! I thought you were going to tell me was married or turned out to be gay!"

"What? No!"

"Mom. It's okay. If he's 50 or even 45 or so, what's the big deal?"

Connie's hollow laugh betrayed her, and Mackenzie picked up on it immediately.

"He's not 45, is he?"

There was a fairly long pause before her mom said, "No."

"Is he...40?"

Mackenzie's voice went way up when she said the word 'forty' as though that was the point at which she would be afraid.

An even longer pause caused Mackenzie to speak before her mom could.

"Oh, my God! Is this guy in his 20s or something?" she said indicating she was on the verge of freaking out.

"Twenties? No! Oh, my heavens, no. He's definitely not in his 20s."

"So...is at least...35?" her daughter asked, the age getting the same emphasis as before.

"Yes. He's older than that."

Now it was Mackenzie who was silent.

She finally asked, "How much older?"

Connie was unaware that she was wincing as she said, "Thirty-nine?" more like a question than a statement.

"Mackenzie?" her mom asked after several seconds of silence.

"Sorry, Mom. I was just thinking how glad I was that I went so low on my guess. That made your saying '39' seem so much better than had I just went there from 45 to 40."

"Are you upset?" her mom asked, still cringing a little as she spoke.

"No. I'm not...upset. I'm just trying to understand. That's all."

"I'm not sure I do, either, honey. That's why I wanted to talk."

Over the initial shock, Mackenzie's mind was racing to find the right words to say.

"So it's only been a week or so then, right?"

"Um...yes. A week—ish."

"Okay, then it can't be serious, so...I don't really see the problem."

When her mom didn't respond, Mackenzie said, "It isn't serious, is it?"

"Um. No. At least I don't think it is."

"But it could be."

"Maybe?" her mother finally said after hesitating for several moments.

"Wait. You said he runs a catering business. Was this guy...is he the bartender from my reception?"

"Um...yes. That would be him," her mother replied as she cringed again.

Mackenzie's reply was so unexpected that Connie was sure how to react.

"Oh, hell yeah! Go Mom!"

"So you approve?" her very confused mother asked.

Mackenzie had seen him, and had it not been her wedding day, she'd have said something about how hot the bartender was. Now that she knew he was they guy her mother was talking about, she assumed this was all physical.

"Of course I approve! Mom. You're 58, not dead. If you want a...boy toy...I say go for it!"

The lack of a response forced Mackenzie to realize this wasn't purely physical.

"Mom. You...you really like this guy, don't you?"

This time her voice was kind and gentle as the realization set in.

"I think I do, honey."

Several seconds passed in silence before Connie heard, "Then I'm happy for you, Mom."

"Do you really mean that?"

"I do. I can't say I understand, but I always knew Alan was completely wrong for you. I tried to be supportive because I thought you really liked him. You guys are about the same age, and you were miserable. So if this Matt guy makes you happy, I'll try and be okay with...with him being..."

Mackenzie said, "Almost 40," to avoid saying anything with a '3' in it.

"I don't want you to think I've lost my mind, honey," her mom said almost apologetically.

"I don't, Mom. I...I just don't want you to get hurt. Again."

"I wasn't hurt by Alan. I was just...sleepwalking...by thinking it was better to be with someone who cared for me than being alone."

"And this Matt makes you feel alive?"

"Oh, honey, it's so much more than that. He...he doesn't seem younger than me when we talk. He seems like...he reminds me of your father."

"Does he make you feel like Daddy did?"

"Kind of. It's not the same, but no one will ever be like your dad, sweetie. But yes, he makes me feel like that."

"Wow. That's huge, Mom."

"I have no idea where, if anywhere, this might go, but he seems to really like me, too, and he wants to see me again. Soon."

"You're going to, right?"

"As long as you don't, you know, think I'm crazy or anything."

"Mom? You're the most amazing mother and my best friend. Dad's been gone a long time, and I've never seen you really happy since. You're also smart and you know what's best for you. So if you really like him and you trust him, then...no. I don't think you're crazy at all."

"Well, he's definitely not interested in me for my money," her mom replied, laughing for the first time.

Mackenzie knew the wedding and reception had eaten up a huge chunk of the money she'd put away over the years, so there wasn't any 'gold' for any man to dig where her mom was concerned.

"So will we get to meet him?" she asked her mom.

"I guess that depends on how things go."

"Well, if they go well, we'd love to have you both come over sometime."

Connie laughed when she realized her new son-in-law had been listening as he said, "Yes we would, Mom!" calling her that for the first time.

"Give Robert an extra hug for me, okay?" she told her daughter.

"Oh, I think that can be arranged."

The way Mackenzie said it made her mom wonder if there wasn't some 'pre hanky, panky' going on at that very moment.

"Honey? I'm gonna let you go, but thank you for being there and for not making feel like I've lost my mind."

"Mom? I love you. You know that. So if you're happy, so am I. Okay?"

"Okay. Thank you, and bye, honey!"

"Bye, Mom. Oh. And don't do anything I wouldn't do...if I could."

Connie heard Mackenzie's husband say, "You better not even want to do anything like that!" as her daughter laughed and said, "Bye, Mom! Love you!"

"I love you..."

Before she got to 'too', the phone went dead, and Connie smiled as she remembered what love was like back then. And then she realized that it could very well feel that way again. Even for her.

She looked at her phone then smiled as she got ready to answer Matt's text.

"I'm so sorry it took me so long to get back to you, Matt. I had a crazy day, so to speak, and Mackenzie just got back from her honeymoon, and we haven't really talked since she left. But that doesn't mean I wasn't thinking about you or that I don't want to see you, because I was and I do. Just let me know when and I'll be there."

As she reread the text before sending it, the warmth came back, and this time it was accompanied by a tingle; a tingle she hadn't experienced since she and her husband first met. That realization made her smile, and for the first time in a long, long time, she let herself be happy.

Satisfied, she hit 'send' then smiled again.

"If I wasn't working at this very minute, I'd suggest right now," Matt texted back just seconds later.

"Were I a selfish woman, I'd ask you to come over right now," a renewed Connie told him.

"And not being selfish is just one of the many things I like about you. But were you selfish—in that way—I'd still come over."

"I could make dinner for you one night this week," Connie wrote.

"Just once?" Matt teased adding several funny emojis to make sure she knew he was kidding.

"Ha! Okay, I could probably stand to cook twice in the same week."

"Something tells me you're a very good cook who's too modest to say so."

Connie was an excellent cook, and yes, she was too modest to say it.

"I used to love to cook when I had someone else to cook for."

"I'd never expect anyone to cook for me—or do anything else I can do myself—but that does sound really nice."

"Then let me," Connie wrote, her heart opening up to this much-younger man as the moments unfolded.

"I could clear my schedule tomorrow evening."

"Tomorrow sounds wonderful."

"Yes it does. What time works best for you?"

"I could have dinner ready around 7 o'clock. How does that sound?"

Matt smiled then again wrote, "Wonderful. See you then, Connie."

Connie's heart was beating fast as she signed off.

"I can't wait to see you again, Matt!"

He sent some smiles to her and got a bunch of hearts in return.

Both of them set their phones down and thought similar thoughts.

"I think I'm falling in love with her," Matt said as he picked the phone back up and reread her words several times.

"Had I not talked with my Mackenzie, I'd have never asked him to come over," Connie realized as she began thinking about what to make for their first sit-down dinner.

The perfect meal came to mind almost immediately. She hadn't made it in years but knew it was what she wanted to make. It was called Mustard-Crusted Lamb, and while she had most of what she needed in the house, she was going to have to get up and get to the store before it closed because she didn't want to have to do that and get ready the next evening after work.

While Matt was up to his eyeballs in work the next day, Connie found herself dreading doing the same old thing for another eight hours. She was grateful to have the job, but it was definitely a job and not something she loved. The day dragged on, and she found herself watching the clock. Each time she looked she was sure an hour or two had passed only to learn that it had been 15 or 20 minutes.

But the 'whistle' eventually blew, and she was soon home and getting ready for what she hoped was a second date. She'd never asked what their time together in the park was, but based on the kissing they'd done, it seemed reasonable to assume it had been a date. So if this could be considered a second date...

Her body shivered again as the thought of a third date and what that typically represented hit her. It had been so long since she'd made love that it both excited her and scared her to think about it happening with Matt. The entire last year she'd spent with Alan was completely sexless, and the fact that it hadn't bothered her at all now bothered her greatly because she still very much wanted to make love. It just had to be with the right man, and that most definitely hadn't been Alan.

Just the thought of being with Matt brought another even harder shiver that made her weak in the knees. It also caused a bevy of fears to well up inside her as she tried to imagine him seeing her...unclothed...for the first time. Connie took very good care of herself, but she was 58 years old, and no matter how good she looked relative to other women her age, Matt wasn't even 40 and undoubtedly looked amazing. She hadn't even seen him with his shirt off yet, but she could tell he was very well put together, and that thought made her wonder what in the world she thought she was doing.

She consoled herself with the belief that she could and would deal with that if and when the time came. For now, she wanted to look her best and make the best meal she possibly could because those were the only things currently under her control.

Connie got everything ready to put in the oven as it preheated. In a small bowl she stirred the Dijon mustard with seeds then added two tablespoons of mint leaves, and the same amount of shallots and continued mixing. She then turned on the top burner and began bringing four quarts of water to a boil for the red potatoes.

As things heated up, she went to the bedroom and picked out something to wear then went back and checked on the food. Three more similar trips allowed her to get dressed, do her makeup, and still have the entire meal ready by 7 o'clock.

With just two minutes to spare, Connie set the last of the food out, and took a quick look around.

"Not bad," she told herself, mostly for the meal, but also for the way she looked. All she could do now was hope that Matt would approve of both just as the doorbell rang.

"Matt! Hi," she said as she opened the door.

"Hi," he replied, a big smile on his face. "These are for you."

The bouquet of roses was amazing. The flowers were fully bloomed and there was Baby's Breath all around that added to their beauty.

"Matt! Thank you! These are so pretty!" she told him as he stepped inside.

"Speaking of pretty, you look fantastic," he told her.

A flood of warmth washed over her as she thanked him.

"You look quite nice yourself," she told him.

"It's been quite awhile since I wore a jacket for anything not work related," he told her as he followed her to the kitchen.

The camel-colored sports coat looked very nice with the black pants and a very dark-green shirt.

"I had no idea you were such a dapper dresser," Connie said as she found a vase for the flowers.

"Thank you, but you're the one who looks...wow."

Connie laughed and thanked him again as she felt like the little black dress she hadn't worn in months was a hit.

"And if dinner tastes anything like it smells, I may not ever leave," Matt kidded.

Connie wanted to say something along the lines of, "That would be just fine by me," but knew it wasn't the right time or place.

"Maybe we should find out how long you'll be staying then," she said instead in a cheerful tone of voice. "If you'll open the bottle of wine on the table, I'll be ready to join you by the time you're ready to pour."

Matt did that and just as he finished, Connie walked over to sit down.

"Here," he said as he held her chair.

Connie thanked him as he sat back down.

Matt took his wine glass and raised it.

"A toast. To..."

His smile disappeared as he quietly said, "Finding someone who understands."

Connie was so touched and surprised by the toast she was barely able to speak after they touched glasses.

"Your toast was perfect. Finding someone who understands is pretty wonderful," she said after they took a first sip.

Matt smiled again then said, "Yes it is."

After an initial bite that caused Matt to nearly do an imitation of Precious Pup from the cartoons of her youth who floated in the air after eating something he liked, Connie knew the lamb was a home run.

The conversation took a lighter turn after that with no mention of loss or grief. Even so, that unspoken bond was there, and both of them were keenly aware of it even though it hadn't come back up.

Matt shared how he left active duty after his five-year commitment was up and how he got into the catering business. He'd never cooked and had no practical experience, but both his mom and sister were excellent with food, and after helping them coordinate an event for a large group of family and friends, Matt pitched the idea to them, and both of them loved it.

It took a full year to really get noticed, but one high-vis client went out of her way to let her other well-off friends know about Reynolds Catering and the gorgeous young man who owned it. Soon, they needed to hire a full-time chef and bought their first of three delivery vans. With them came other employees, and now they'd expanded to five vehicles and were booked solid most of the time.

What never came up was how Matt had funded the venture, and Connie hadn't asked because she didn't care. She assumed he was probably deeply in debt and maybe even losing money, but she also thought it was at least possible he might be just in the black by now. It never occurred to her that he had a net worth close to three-quarters of a million dollars.

But the truth was Matt left Iraq with a little over a half million from the life insurance policy and something called a 'death gratuity'. The former was worth $400,000 and the latter another hundred grand. He'd also put away nearly $25,000 of his own and First Lieutenant Casey Reynolds had had about half that much in her account when she was so savagely killed.

The money was small compensation for the loss of the only woman former Marine Captain Matt Reynolds had ever loved, but it was there, and he'd used it wisely and was now making good money from his investment.

Connie did her best to put a positive spin on her job as she emphasized how thankful she was to have it.

"But it's not really something you enjoy," Matt rightly observed after listening to her for a few minutes.

"No, but I suppose that's why they call it 'work', huh?" she said with a smile that caused Matt to experience something similar to what had happened when they'd kissed at the park.

"I love your smile," he told her out of the blue.

Another wave of emotion swept over Connie as she thanked him and said, "I kind of like yours, too."

"Is it okay if I tell you how much I enjoy being with you?" Matt asked as though he hadn't already said it.

"I don't think I'd mind hearing that," she replied with a coy little smile.

"It's true. I do enjoy being with you. In fact, I can't think of anything that I don't like about you, Connie Harris."

This time there was a huge flutter in her tummy as Matt looked at her in a way that made her feel so happy she could hardly believe it was happening.

"You...you really don't know me all that well then," she replied, unable to hold his stare.

"No, but I'd like to change that," he said even more quietly than before.

Her actions made him think that perhaps he'd pushed too hard too soon, so he reached for the wine bottle and asked if she'd like a little more.

"Oh. Yes. Please."

Matt added a bit to hers then did the same to his.

"So Mackenzie's back home, right?" he asked, hoping to find something less...upsetting.

"Yes. They had a wonderful time, and now they're getting settled in."

"That 'just married' feeling is pretty amazing," Matt offered, the smile now back.

"Yes it is. And so is everything else, if you..."

Matt said, "Find the right person," at the same time Connie did, and when she laughed, he thought that perhaps he'd misjudged the situation. Maybe, just maybe, she'd looked away because she felt the same way he did, and that hope was all he needed to go back to his original game plan.

"Did you maybe want to sit down in the living room?" Connie suggested once she knew Matt was done eating.