by Marquis de Happy
Interesting set-up, but was there a story in there?
-- KVK
I think you captured perfectly the Mistress/slave dynamic. When you write more, I'll happily read it.
too much telling not enough showing -- not dramatic enough
You have caught the right tone...now explore the mentality in follow up stories.
Total bliss with an older woman. What a turn on.
If you like sado-masochism this is your dish of offal.
For the read.