All Comments on 'The Play Ch. 01'

Of course from this loser author

Great job...so many possibilities and loose threads to be worked out later!

Of course, she got her fun at his expense, regardless of what the level of fun was. Now it's time to see if it was worth it!

These people might be the dumbest most clueless people I have ever read about it my life. Next chapter will be RACC as dumb as the people have been written to be what else could happen? She is fucking piece of shit and he is an ignorant loser!

I must confess to being a sucker where stories present art imitateimg or morphing in & out of life. The setting of a theater with a play, where the lead characters are following the script on and off the stage is full of possibilities and fascinating complications.

fawguy88 rates five stars from me for taking chances with a backdrop that most other authors would chuck in favor of the usual cheating heart cliches. This still could go very wrong,but so far I'm loving the multi-layered drama.

Looking forward to see, where you're taking this.

I hope you continue this one and please - DO NOT TURN HIM INTO A WIMPY CUCKOLD! There are already too many authors here without balls.

He'll be ready for reconcilliation.

It's hard enough writing a convincing story without having to write a convincing play inside of it. Five stars for the execution and the guts it took to do it.

However, the twist at the end, along with the confrontation and the difficulty in writing a play within the story...I give you 4/5

It was okay, good writing and story. Not convinced the husband wouldn't have made more of a fuss when he saw the props were missing. Stuff up a scene in the play by getting the props yourself and throwing them on stage? or sit back and watch your marriage go down the toilet.

What a gerat story! it was emotional and exciting. Well Done. 5 star all of the way.

Make up your own ending whatever that may be. I hate when the BTB crowd try to take over a story. They are only psychopaths who feel no pain for others and make up about 10% of the population. Humans don't deserve to be sent to Mexican whore houses even if they are sluts.

Be true to yourself and I will accept whatever ending you come up with.

Very good start. Got really involved with characters. Will be interesting to see how she puts things back together. Hope the husband hangs tough. What an awful humiliation she put him through.

I enjoyed this part of the story and look forward to the balance. To those commenters who think RACC or BTB are the only paths they are wrong. First he told her how he felt many times. Second she had that special rehearsal she lied about. Third the script itself should have told her what to expect. He is not torching her. He is leaving her. Why should he be humiliated. 50=50 split and irreconcilable differences. Very fair to me.

then YES! Fawguy has written more than a few cuck stories. Interesting(?), how the Graduate, (the most mainstream cuck story since King Arthur), was used as the basis for the play within the play. I fear that there are only two ways to go here....1)reconciliation or 2)Tom "loses" and ends up bitter and alone. Of course, HOW these two options play out have their own possibilities. The case may be made that he will be better without her, as she lost respect for hubby and refused to control her baser desires, and now he can't trust her anymore....BUT......this author has proven his philosophy: that taking what he can get is better than having nothing. I can't imagine Fawguy suddenly adopting a BTB stance. However, IF they get back together, GOSH I hope that she is truly sorry, and has learned a lesson not to take Tom for granted anymore. Yet somehow I doubt it, as the groundwork has been laid that Tom hasn't been doing it for her anymore (fat, balding, older, boring, jealous and controlling), and for awhile, at that. So that said, I really appreciated the "attempt" to create something different with this story, and YES, Fawguy is well on his way to scoring some points for originality. I appreciate when it is obvious that an author on this site has set out to challenge himself to a higher level. I agree with others that this must have been a greater challenge (writing a play within a story) than he has attempted prior, but since the "play" has concluded before chapter one was even over, I imagine that the future chapters will merely outline the obvious heartbreak and reactions of the characters. How skillfully THIS is accomplished will be the TRUE measure of how original and successful this author will prove out to be with this latest effort. Of course I will read it, but as tantalizing as chapter one was, I am skeptical that these characters will sustain my interest over the next few chapters that will chronicle the demise of another cucked loser. Fawguy, PLEASE check over your dialogue before posting. Will it pack the emotional punch necessary, or will it just be another useless sluts empty excuses for destroying the lives of folks she claims to love without ever understanding what real love is? I'm sure it is already written, but it is never too late to double check your work. Does it say what you really want? Is it enough to convince someone in real life? And just what will your message be to the reader? Good luck! I will vote at the end.

Only faggots engage in stage plays. period.

The set up to this point was decent. I'm not a RAAC fan. So I guess I'm hoping he goes scorched earth. He next meets Gerry and friends with a bat. So much for their acting futures. 5 stars for the writing. But reserving judgment till the end.

The start was OK, but why should the aggrieved party leave the house? Let her sleep with her fuck buddy.

Something similar happened at an Am Dram group I was a member of, 30 years ago. The trouble it caused? Bloody loads!

Waiting for part 2, now!

Hubby could have ripped off the covers and seen for himself if they had done it,and the audience would see them....among other things jess was cruel to him,she basically laughed at him at the end of the play.While I am not btb if the director set this up,hopefully hubby will make him pay,boot in the groin helps.Bet the director told them to bait hubby,make him jealous,to 'make it more real',but gerald decided to make it real,and if so hubby should file for divorce and name him and sue the shit out of him.Pp

Gerald needs some real hurting and the wife let herself go. Hope this guy stand tall. But why did he not move her out, she slipped ,so why is he leaving. Punish her.

you should have put rock salt in the shot gun shells. stings like hell but

will not kill, may break the skin

In the opening, Hubby indicates that the seduction went on right in front of him! Different from the play, much of the seduction was the Young Bull's doing! However, it is also made clear that Sweetie was an increasingly enthusiastic seductee! She seals the deal, from my perspective, NOT getting nailed on-stage, but when she starts taking the Bull's side on everything to the point of showing cruel disrespect to her husband!

Overweight, balding middle-aged Thespian men can be displayed to be as non-wimp as a martial artist! Excellent story.

5*

Good start, anxiously awaiting your next installment of The Play.

Quite the cliffhanger. Feel like calling you a bastard for leaving it there. Cautious about where you plan to take this and while it doesn't have to be BTB a RAAC ending would be disappointed. No way to justify it in my opinion. I agree with others, the lack of respect came long before the sex. I don't honestly believe she would be comfortable doing this role in front of family, friends and co-workers. Perhaps she planned being a slut from the outset.

Get visual conformation then improvise with some sweet ground and pound on that motherfuckers sweede, swing the gun straight down on his balls and spit in his face, grab a fist full of the bitches hair and rip her off the bed, hows that for realism? if they can change it up why can't he? fag should've grown some balls back at the BBQ but he dropped nuts. kinda deserved it i suppose for not taking care of his shit right then. roll on Act 2.

A really believable storyline and a very well written story.

Totally erotic and hot, and the scene of Jess and Gerald on the final night, even if she didn't get fucked was really sexy, since that fact hasn't been proven yet.

I think Jess' husband needs to get some more revenge on Gerald yet, perhaps fuck him up royally, using a cricket wicket on the bastard since his hand is fucked up. Then see if the bloke is still laughing about making him a cuckold.

A really good story that made all of the characters come alive.

Thanks for the read and hope that the rest of the story is coming soon.

A weak and dreary reconciliation. He was just so jealous, and she was only pretending. Right.

Congratulations!!!

Am looking forward to the next installment.

we were just acting. TK U MLJ LV NV

Can see it now, will be the wimp going back to the slut.

Great start. The only question. Will Tom be a man or a wimp? I'll be reading...

"betrayedbylove" will do

I like the originality, but I am a bit nervous (based on previous submissions from this author) that a RAAC is on the horizon. Fucking in public as a "joke" during the play, when it was clear others in the group were in on it, should surely result in a lawsuit. Take the profits away from the director and he won't think hubby had unrealistic concerns -- his reassurances notwithstanding. Four stars for good writing and originality.

Ready for ch 2!

I enjoyed your story. Don't take these things so seriously people, it's a STORY, a fantasy, call it what you will.... Waiting for the next part, enjoyed it so far!!!

The husband in this story was left no choice. His wife humiliated and disrespected him. He needs to do whatever is necessary to regain his self respect. He needs to do what he has to do.

He hears about and sees the underwear being removed and does nothing? He punches the guy in the mouth but the guy is grinning at curtain call? He sees his wife cheat on him but goes out for a bow before he leaves?

I really enjoyed this story. I see some REAL opportunities to explore the characters. I and see the college kids (Gerry and his co-conspirators) suffering ... One by one. I can see Gerry being the last to get what is coming to him. I am not flaw guy, but I see people dying. I foresee a later reenactment of the final stage scene, at Tom's house, but this time the gun works.

I felt pissed from just reading this piece. It certainly drew me in.

I love the tension! Keep it up!

I seem to recall a similar story posted a few years ago with this same plot. I wish I could remember the title and author. They split up at the end...

story was good, and your writing has always been excellent , but to many misplaced or misspelled and unintended words.

a pro that needs to proof read prior to presenting to public.

Secondly he should have stopped it hen it heated up. Third he should have beat the kid more and put him in the hospital. Third he should have beat the producer or director too!!! This is a good read but it's not believable.

I bet she would have acted a jealous fool if the roles were reversed.

Very well written and creative story. Five stars.

. . . but a good stretch run finish. For most of the reading I was comparing this story to another one on Lit few years ago of similar plot; this story didn't hold up well. I must say the finish worked well. Real bullets in the gun might have been satisfying to some, but unrealistic and rather messy for stage and story.

I do always have a problem reading GB English as I am an unabashed American but I managed to get into the flow of the language. I think this is a case where the writing through the first three quarters of the story could be tightened to help the flow. In some cases terse is better.

All in all I will await the next chapter to see how things go. Can Jess save her marriage? Can Gerry find a good plastic surgeon?

I will get irritated if he goes back to her, but that means that the author has gotten me emotionally involved and shows his talent.

The husband who knows how hot wet and horny this young guy is making his wife... OVERHEARS a plot to fuck here on stage and he cannot find the time to say 11 words....."jess he says he plans on fucking you on stage tonight..."

3 seconds of speech?

I am laughing so hard at this contrived plot twist.... I gotta go pee!!!!

Don't let the slut back. Show that you do have some balls.

From the start, I kept thinking hubby should have insisted on a script change. When he discovers his cheating whore, he adds a scene where he is leaving with a hot young chick, far hotter than his middle aged wife all the while in a jot sex scene with her, fully of "simulated" sex. After all what middle aged guy wouldn't love to be making out wirh a hot chick on stage? A little ego gratification goes both ways. Hope hubby burns the bitch. She richly deserves it.

BULLSHIT!

When the prop underwear wasn't there she NEVER should have stripped!

And she CERTAINLY shouldn't have let him enter her! Sheesh!

some are for the better others not-so. TK U MLJ LV NV

Really love this story. Still five stars. Very well developed.

But he is a stupid shit for even allowing the play in the first place.

Now you will pay!! Policywank is a guy or Fag cuck shit guy, or Facebook profile guy or Annony is an fat old ugly fag will get dropped on your stories. On noooo. You will pay!!

TRASH

Talk about disrespect to her husband. Not once did she care to acknowledge her husband's serious concerns and put a stop to things. And the show must go on excuse. Clearly she started doing things to hurt and humiliate him. He was right in dumping her.

However I see RAAC coming. Somehow Tom will become the bad guy for overreacting or some other such bull shit. Even though she clearly was enjoying things, allowed things to progress and even initiated. She even had the nerve to take Gerry's side in all of the arguments. Total disrespect. Tom clearly loves her but she does not love him; her actions were meant to hurt Tom.

Just because Tom loves her doesn't mean he should stayed married to her. The trust should be gone which is just as important as love. Also her respect for him is obviously gone.

So many stories have these elements

Real life how many actors and actresses cross the line and have affairs

How hard to get balls and say hell no you are not doing that

I get tired of husbands that have no balls and self respect and help in their own cuckolding

Someone stop you hell no push aside scream your ass off

Pathetic!

....would have been to rip the duvet cover off them both just as they climaxed, and let the whole audience see them actually fucking.

There would be no room for excuses from Jess, no "we didn't really have sex", etc.. and no room to deny she was unfaithful. With a bit of luck the judge that will eventually (I hope) preside over their divorce would also be in the audience.

No man, in his right mind, would have allowed this to go so far.

He admitted he had let himself go, only in his 40's yet fat and balding, any wife married to a bloke like that, would enjoy the flirtation of a young man. Did they fuck, nobodies 100% sure, ok I accept she was way out of order but what a wimp he proved to be and then taking off and threatening divorce, without talking it through was stupid. He would live a lonely miserable existence, I will be amazed if he doesn't have her back, me being a woman, I wouldn't want him back.