The Taming of a Vixen Ch. 09-11

"Do you know how difficult it was to keep her from getting me alone this week? She's going to want to speak to me before the wedding, you know she will." Jason paced the floor, sinking onto the sofa and then jumping back up to pace some more.

"You've made it this far, Jason. And besides, isn't it considered bad luck for the bride to see the groom before the actual ceremony?" Teddy checked his own appearance in the mirror, smoothing back his dark hair with a steady hand.

"Can you believe it?" Jason spouted suddenly. "I'm going to be a father."

"Unless you tell Alyssa that you're this Jamie character, then I doubt you'll have enough blood left in you to be much more than dead." Teddy couldn't help but chuckle as his friend's face blanched. "It will be fine, old man," he said, slapping him on the back. "Don't worry so much. Marry the girl, bed her, and then let her tell you. She can play the apologetic, eternally sorry wife, you can be the big man and offer to raise her child as your own. She'll be happy, and better yet, she'll be grateful."

"You're an ass, Teddy. You know that?"

Teddy burst out laughing. "But just think, the first time you do something to annoy her, you can bring up the baby and she'll forgive you instantly. You'll have carte blanche dear boy, to sin as much as you please."

"You are so lucky that I can't have you carried up to stand next to me today, Teddy. Otherwise, I'd be laying you out on the carpet right now," Jason growled, wondering why he'd felt the need to confide in Teddy. He felt bad enough about his little deception. He didn't need Teddy's remarks to make him feel worse.

He had agonized all week over how to tell Alyssa that he was Jamie, the father of her child, the only man she had ever bedded. But every time he saw her, he just couldn't do it. He couldn't take the chance that she would walk away from him, baby or no baby. He couldn't lose her.

There was a knock on the door and Teddy walked over to answer it, bringing back a folded up piece of paper and handing it to Jason. "I think you were expecting this," Teddy said, staring at him expectantly. "The footman is waiting for an answer."

"Can't you just tell them you couldn't find me?" Jason asked, staring down at the piece of paper in his hand as if it were a poisonous snake.

"He saw you in here, Jason. Come on, be a man and open the note. Let's see what it says."

It was what he had expected, a summons. She needed to speak to him before the wedding. It was important. He should follow the footman.

"And?" Teddy cocked an eyebrow at him, a slight smile on his face. "What are you going to do, man? Are you going to tell the girl, get it out in the open so that there are no more lies between you?"

Jason glared at Teddy. "I hope that when it's your turn to walk down the aisle, Cat puts you through this."

"Hmmm I wonder if I could get away with sneaking in her window some night and despoiling her virtue. Think I could borrow your mask, old man?"

"Go to hell, Teddy."

"You need company? Because I think you're already there, my friend." He clasped Jason on the back and pushed him towards the door. "Tell her. You'll feel better having her know the truth, no matter how mad she gets."

Jason went to the door, his steps slow, almost as if he were off to face the hangman and not the woman he was to marry this day. A hangman's noose would probably have been easier to deal with than what he had to tell Alyssa.

She was waiting in a small room off her father's library. Cat, playing the lookout for this visit, gave him a sympathetic smile before shooing him into the room with Alyssa. Wearing an old dressing gown over her shift, corset and the hundred some underskirts she wore, she paced the floor, her mind whirling. How would she tell him? Would she lose him? Her heart sank as she thought of him turning and walking out on her.

"Alyssa?" Jason walked into the room, hearing Cat close the door behind him. She looked beautiful, her hair elaborately styled, pearls hanging from her tiny earlobes, a string of them gracing her throat with a huge emerald clasp.

"Jason, I'm glad you came."

"Isn't it bad luck for a groom to see the bride before the ceremony?" he asked, bending to kiss her cheek. His hand rose, his fingers brushing that same cheek before he took both her hands into his. "You're ice cold, Alyssa." He brought both of her hands, cupped in his larger ones to his mouth and blew warm air over them. "Are you all right, love?"

"No, Jason, I'm not. Could we perhaps sit down?"

"Of course," he said, drawing her over to a small sofa that was at the side of the room. It was a chaperones sofa, a place for the elders to sit to give an unmarried couple a little privacy with their talk, yet still allowing them to keep an eye out for inappropriate behavior.

"What is it, love? What has you so upset?" he asked turning to face her as she sat on the sofa next to him. He studied her face; her skin was pale and shadows bespoke of sleepless nights. The guilt of his duplicity sank even further into his conscience.

"I need to tell you something, Jason. It is important. And if you do not wish to marry me after you hear the truth of my actions, then I will understand."

She clenched her fists in her hands, worrying a small square of linen that had at one time been a handkerchief. With her mauling, it now resembled an old rag.

"I don't think there is anything you could tell me that would make me turn my back on you, Alyssa. You know how I feel about you, don't you love?" He scooted closer to her, lifting her chin and kissing her gently on her trembling lips.

She responded eagerly for a moment before pushing him back. "You must let me tell you, Jason. You must let me talk. Please?" she begged, tears gathering in her eyes.

The tears were his undoing. He felt her sorrow and guilt and it made his own ten times worse. He opened his mouth to speak, to tell her he was Jamie, to get it out in the open, and felt her fingers press against his lips.

"We don't have much time, Jason. I still have to put on my gown-if you still want the ceremony to go forward after we speak. So please, don't say anything until after I tell you."

Jason closed his eyes, swallowing back the words that had been about to rush from his lips. Opening his eyes, he nodded.

"I have been unfaithful to you, Jason. I...I no longer possess my maidenhead. It happened the night the highwaymen tried to hurt me. A man rescued me. He took me to an old barn. We...we made love in the hay, Jason." She looked down at her hands, unable to meet his eyes any longer. "And then he came to me again one night, coming into my room while I slept."

Jason swallowed as she paused, opening his mouth to speak, but she continued before he could.

"Those times were before I knew you Jason, I mean, we had met but you hadn't begun to court me. After that, well he came twice more, but both times I sent him away. I couldn't betray you like that. I couldn't!" she insisted.

"Is that all?" he asked slowly, keeping his voice even.

"No."

"Then what is the rest of it?" he asked.

"I...I am with child," she said in a rush, looking up at him, then quickly looking down at her hands, tearing the handkerchief into small strips of material.

"Y...you are sure?" he asked, hating himself for not speaking the words that would ease her conscience and put the guilt where it belonged, on his shoulders.

"Yes. I mean..." she paused, wiping her eyes with what little material was left in her hands. "I think I am."

Jason sat back on the sofa, staring at the fireplace, out the glass doors that led to the garden, at the picture that stood above the mantle. Anywhere but at Alyssa. She only thought she was pregnant. She wasn't sure yet. Perhaps there was no baby and he wouldn't have to confess to his own guilt in the matter. They could put the whole of it behind them and never think of it again.

Alyssa stared at him, trying to guess his mind. But his face was blank, his body slumped against the sofa. She reached out a trembling hand, tentatively touching his arm. "Jason? I will abide by whatever decision you make. If you wish to end our engagement, I shall take the blame. It is my fault this happened. I should never have..." She couldn't finish her sentence.

Jason turned his head, his eyes finding hers and recognizing in them the determination to see this thing though. "Then I suppose you should get dressed. You can't marry me in that old dressing gown, can you?"

Her eyes huge, Alyssa felt her heart jump into her throat. "Does this mean you forgive me?"

"There is nothing to forgive, my love. You turned the bounder aside when he

came to you after our engagement. What happened before, well, there is no changing it. I wasn't a saint or a choirboy before you, and if you can forgive me those indiscretions, I see no reason not to forgive you." He leaned over, kissing her wet cheek. "Now go bathe your eyes, or else people will think I'm forcing you into this."

"But...but what about the baby?" Alyssa said, enjoying his hand on her arm, helping her up off the couch. "What if I am pregnant?" Her cheeks flushed as she said the word.

"One step at a time, my love. We'll get married, and then take it from there." He had to turn from her, unable to handle the gratitude he saw on her face.

He felt like the worse sort of cad. The only thing he could do was to show her how he felt about her. He could and would make her the happiest woman on the planet. It was his silent vow. He kissed her cheek once more. "I'll see you in a bit, love," he said as he opened the door, startling Cat from her place against it, her ear to the heavy wood.

She scurried back with a blush. Jason cocked a brow at her in askance before he leaned down and whispered in her ear. "Teddy doesn't deserve you."

Cat stared at him a moment before rushing into the room with Alyssa. "Are you all right?"

"Yes," Alyssa said, still standing where he left her. "H...he said that he'd done things he wasn't proud of and if I could forgive him than he had to forgive me."

"But the b... the baby?" Cat asked, lowering her voice to a whisper on the last two words.

Alyssa straightened her shoulders and wiped her eyes with the sleeve of her dressing gown. Jason had confidence in her; he'd forgiven her, now she had to do what she could to make him the best wife possible. "He said we'd take it a day at a time. But first, we have to get married. Come on," she said to her friend, grabbing her hand. "Let's get me dressed."

* * *

The garden bloomed with riotous colors, the heavenly scent of the flowers wafting through the air. There was a gentle breeze blowing, just enough to catch the hem of a gown and give a glimpse of a well-turned ankle.

Jason, a top hat upon his head, stood at the end of a long white carpet. It had been laid across the silky green grass of the park-like area where he and Alyssa had met that long ago day. Teddy was at his side, a huge grin on his face.

"Quit smiling like that," Jason hissed at him. "People are staring."

"I have every right to smile. I just won my wager at the club on whether or

not you'd try to wiggle out of the noose. I figure since you are down here, it'd be hard for you to get away." He kept the grin even after Jason's elbow plowed into his gut.

"You placed a wager upon my marriage?" Jason said, turning to stare with disbelief at his friend.

"Hey, I had the inside information. How could I not jump at the chance to take their money so easily?" Teddy rubbed his stomach as the music from the small orchestra started. He watched as Cat walked down the aisle, in a stylish dark blue gown that fit like a second skin. It was low cut, the bodice studded with tiny beads that glimmered in the light. He couldn't take his eyes off of her.

Jason was having the same problem, just with a different lady. Alyssa, her face hidden by a lace veil, was walking slowly up the aisle toward him. Her dress was not the regular style of the day, which called for bustles with yards and yards of fabric. No, she wore a gown from another era, the skirt floating over the many underskirts she wore. It was white satin, the only adornment the pale blue ribbon that wrapped around her incredibly tiny waist. Off the shoulder puff sleeves left her arms and a goodly amount of chest bare, except for the lace that covered her from the veil.

He wished he could see her eyes, see the expression upon her face and know if she felt better about today. He wished he could halt this entire affair, get down on his knees and beg her forgiveness for the pain he'd caused her.

He wished he wasn't such a cad.

But then he was stepping forward, taking her hand from her father's arm after shaking the man's hand. He placed her arm upon his own, drawing her gently forward, his eyes upon the outline he could see through the veil.

The minister started the ceremony, intoning on and on about the merits of married life, asking God's blessing on all and sundry who had appeared.

Through it all, his eyes never left her face.

The vows were spoken, the rings exchanged. Blessings were asked for as they stood together. And then they were pronounced man and wife. Jason's hands shook as he reached for the veil, carefully drawing it over her head.

Her eyes, like smoky crystals, stared into his as he caressed her cheek with his knuckles before bending over her and letting their lips meet.

It was as if he kissed her for the first time; that tender meeting, moistly clinging, hearing her gasp at the heat that flooded her, even in front of all of their guests. His hand fell to her arm, pulling her even closer as his lips grew more demanding, parting to let his tongue slip across her soft mouth.

Then Teddy coughed lightly, elbowing Jason in the back. The kiss was broken.

But the light in her eyes remained, through the long receiving line and the kisses and hugs from people she barely knew. Through the luncheon and the speeches that followed. Through the glasses of champagne that upset her stomach until she switched to water. She felt him beside her, his hand on her arm, or hers upon his. Even as they stood at the top of the stairs of the front door, a crowd of townspeople in front of them to reenact an ancient tradition of throwing coins to the crowd, that light remained.

"Happy?" he asked, leaning down to whisper in her ear.

"Yes, Jason, though I worry that you'll rethink the deal you just made and it will affect the rest of our lives together."

"You are my wife now. I don't plan on letting you out of my sight, my love. Nor out of my bed long enough for you to worry about my intentions." He laughed as she blushed. "I've been thinking of nothing but you since the day you almost took my head off with that beast of yours."

"Vixen's Boy is not a beast," she said, though her voice lacked fury. What she'd told him was true; she worried about what would happen if he changed his mind. She also worried about what would happen tonight, when she would be in his bed for the first time. She could only hope that she wouldn't embarrass herself or him.

They tossed the coins to the crowd, hearing the roar and watching the people scramble after them before turning to go back into the house. Alyssa excused herself to change for the trip to his home, leaving Jason to go back into the crowded ballroom alone.

"I never thought to see the day."

He turned, his eyes widening as he stared at the woman he hadn't thought to see again. "Abigail? How did you get in here?"

"Now is that anyway to greet a lover, my darling? Can't I get a kiss first?"

"You're insane. We ended our arrangement over a month ago." He tried to walk away from her, seeing the curious look upon Edward's face and not wanting to upset his new father-in-law. But Abigail dug in her claws.

"I had to see for myself. I couldn't believe it when I heard the news that you were getting married. What did she do, offer herself up on an altar or something?"

"Abigail, I have no wish to discuss my wife with you. Now, if you'll exc..."

"You're going to want to talk to me, my darling. Especially when you hear my news," Abigail said, her voice going into a soft purr.

"I doubt there is anything that you have to say that I want to hear," Jason said, removing her hand from his arm.

"Not even that I carry your child?" she asked him, slyly sliding a finger down the front of his immaculate black coat.

"Ha! Now that is famous, Abigail. How could you possibly know if it was mine or any of the numerous lovers you've had before, during and since me. Perhaps it belongs to that young stud I found plowing into your dubious charms that night. If I recollect correctly, it seems to me he had you quite thoroughly."

"It is yours, Jason. And you will be made to answer for it," she said, her voice rising shrilly.

"Is everything all right, Jason?" Edward asked, coming up to them from behind.

"Just an uninvited guest, Edward. I was about to see the lady out."

Edward nodded, though his eyes remained wary while Jason took Abigail's arm and escorted her to the front door.

"We will discuss this, Jason. If not here, than later, but you will meet me."

"I don't see the need to meet with you, Abigail. We have nothing to discuss."

"What isn't there to discuss, husband?" came the soft but curious voice from behind him. "Who is this lady?"