This Christmas

"What, why?

"I wish I could tell you..."

"So tell me!"

"Your dad has a dull heart, he must have pushed it overboard and it acted up."

"So, can you get him better?"

"Yeah, but it's going to take a new heart to get him there."

"How long does it normally take?"

"It's hard to say, could take a month, year, week."

"Ok, I understand...thanks"

"No problem" The doctor patted me on the back and went back over to my dad.

I walked back out into the lobby and told Shady and mom what happened. Mom began to cry and Shady tried her best comfort her.

"Hey guys, I'm feeling iffy, I'm going back to the house."

"I'll go with you." Shady said jumping up.

"No Shade, stay here."

"But I want to go." Shady whined

"No, stay here with mom, keep her company." I walked out the door slowly thinking about what the doctor said, thinking about what I said to Shady, everything.

"Wait!" Shady's voice came yelling after me

"Shady go back inside." I yelled back.

"Blake wait," She said walking up to me.

"What Shady"

"I-I wanted to come."

'Shady! I can't deal with this."

"This? Do you mean us?" She asked smoothly

"No! Thi-this whole ordeal is too much, dad in the hospital, us, everything."

"Maybe you and I can handle it together."

"What do you want from me Shady?" I exclaimed "I-I can't offer you anything, I'm your brother and by God I'm madly in love you. But the one thing that I really love, I can't have."

"Says who" She asked

"The entire fucking world that's who. You say you want to be with me but there's no future in this relationship Shady, I mean we had an amazing time together but then what? We do that till Christmas then walk away and carry on with our lives? Then we come back and it's the exact same thing all over again?"

"No, I thought we...."

"What, live together, oh yeah that's it, Shady, do we tell people that we're together? No, and I can't live a lie...I mean Shady c'mon! I'm just going to go."

"....I" Shady couldn't speak

I left her there alone in the parking lot. I knew I had been cruel but I was in no mood to try to sugar coat anything.

The minute I got home I went up to my room. I grabbed all my clothes and packed up, I was leaving. I couldn't stay there, I would think about Shady to much. She would probably ignore me also. I just needed to get away from it all. So I decided to go back to collage early.

"What are doing?" A voice came from behind me

"Nothing Brian...I'm going to head out."

"Why?" He asked entering the room.

"Cause I just can't stand this anymore."

"Listen Blake, I know it's hard but you'll get through this."

"I know, dad has a bad heart but he'll get a new one."

"I wasn't talking about your dad."

I swung my head around in astonishment, did he know about me and Shady. "What do you mean?"

"Blake that might work on your mom and your other cousins but I know better. You and Shady, Yesterday in the woods, ring any bells?

Oh shit, he knew...how though, I was so careful. "Bri listen man it's not what you think."

"Oh, it's exactly what I think, you and Shady have fallen for each other, and that's why you're leaving now." He came over to me and patted me on the shoulder, "What are doing man, I know better than this..."

"I know. I shouldn't feel this way."

"Dude, I'm talking about you not sticking around and being with her."

I shot up in confusion. "Are you insane? She's....you know"

"Yeah, I know but you love her and by all I know I can't believe your running away."

"Brian, you just don't get it do you."

"Oh, I get more than you think. But I can't change your mind on this one so go on and run, I ain't going to stop you."

"Damn it Brian! She's my sister!"

"Yeah, so what"

"So..." I couldn't believe it. He was right. So what if she's my sister, but I couldn't stay anymore I had to go. "Bri, why aren't you pissed at me?"

Brian laughed and placed one arm around me "Believe it or not Blake. I don't find anything about this wrong, so I can't be pissed at you."

"Thanks man." I zipped up my last bag and went walking out the door

"Wait you're still going?" He asked

"Yeah, not because of Shady, I just need to go...call me when you know more about my dad."

"All Right." Brian sighed as I went out.

I drove off knowing that Brian was right and knowing that everything else was wrong. I still had to go though. I can't stand the fact of my dad in the hospital, made me sick even thinking about it. I got on the plane home and just wished that the whole situation hadn't happened. Shady was on my mind all the way to collage. Brian's conversation rushing through my head. Why was he so damn right about everything? I always knew that some day would come when I actually needed his advice but I never thought it would be about this. Oh well the flight is long and I need some sleep.

Tell me if you want to hear what happens next cause this story ain't done yet.